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Didn’t see it coming.

February 7, 2015

After a disappointing season, the Tennessee Titans released OT Michael Oher. Hope he wasn’t blindsided by the news.

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Aaron Hernandez’s lawyer in his murder trial was jokingly asked a state police trooper if he had “training in football deflation devices.” Sounds like the former Patriot actually found a lawyer as dumb as he is.

 

The NFL fined 4 players from $8268 to $10,000 for their roles in the brawl at the end of the Super Bowl. Good to see the league has its priorities in order. Hitting people is almost as bad as wearing the wrong brand of clothing.

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NY Yankees officials says they have now agreed to a sit-down meeting with A-Rod. Ah yes, an early sign that spring is approaching. The circus is coming to town.

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For all those who think they might be the most insane baseball fans they know, San Francisco has finally gotten their first storm of 2015. Serious rain and wind. But some hardcore folks are already camping outside AT&T Park for tomorrow morning’s SF Giants “FanFest.”

 

Open note to Chris Paul, who has always seemed like an enlightened and decent guy, and I am sure didn’t meant to start a firestorm by criticizing one of the two NBA’s female refs: (“We try to get the ball out fast every time down the court, and when we did that, she said, ‘Uh-uh.’ I said, ‘Why, uh-uh?’ And she gave me a tech. That’s ridiculous. If that’s the case, this might not be for her.” )

It’s time for a simple statement, “I was criticizing an official because I didn’t like the calls. I thought and think they were wrong. It had NOTHING to do with her gender. I fully support the NBA’s hiring of female officials. Now let’s move on.”

 

 

 

In Northern California television news stations have put their drought stories on hold for a few days to be replaced by “Stormwatch.”

 

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Occasional disclaimer. If you’ve found my blog because of the sports jokes,   I do jokes about both sports and politics. And I realize that half the country won’t agree with my views.  Though I like to consider myself a moderate, and try to pick on both sides, even  if I pick on one side more than others….  (more material)  In any case, if  you don’t like the political jokes, please feel free to ignore. Or comment. Even criticize n comments.. Just please keep it civil.

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Former Miss. GOP state Sen Tim Johnson announced yesterday he is switching parties. “Why join the Democratic Party and run for lieutenant governor? I’ll tell you: We are all Mississippians first. Elected officials should be in the business of helping all Mississippians, not picking out who to hurt.

“The Republican Party leaders’ actions against supporting Medicaid expansion and threatening our local hospitals was the final, deciding factor for me.”

This is Mississippi, folks. Will Johnson’s campaign mascot be a flying pig?.

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Note to GOP men: On the subject of rape, STFU.

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Horrible indeed. After being made to watch his friends burned alive, he recanted his religion in writing. When he later felt ashamed, and publicly denied the conversion, he was himself publicly burned alive, but put his right hand, which had written the recantation, first into the flame, saying, “this hand has offended.”

Another Mideast horror story? Nope, Archbishop Thomas Cranmer. And these burnings all done by order of Queen Mary 1 of England, 1555-56

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Let’s play two.

January 23, 2015

 

As a child, it was hard to imagine a baseball world without Ernie Banks in it. It still is. RIP Mr. Cub. Hope heaven has a special shiny gold trophy for you with all those little flags on it.

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And yeah, MLB Hall of Fame is one thing. But what greater tribute to a man, ‪#‎ErnieBanks‬ , ‪#‎MrCub‬, is that no one ever said a negative word about him.

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You cannot make this “stuff” up: Actual USAToday.com headline – “Supreme Court will rule on safety of lethal injections.”

 

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A Southern California TV station (KSBY) is reporting that former MLB pitcher Ted Lilly has been charged with 3 felony counts of insurance fraud for damaging his $200,000 RV and not filing a claim until he purchased insurance afterwards. But hey, the guy has to feed his family. Lilly only earned about $100 million in his career.

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Some wondered if there would be repercussions when airlines no longer required electronic devices to be turned off from the moment the door is closed. Alas, here’s one: the company behind the SkyMall catalog has declared Chapter 11. ‪#‎noneedtoread‬

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And how many people read the above and think “Ooh, Skymall close-out sale!”

 

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Of course it makes sense that Tom Brady, who likes his balls “a certain way” wouldn’t have noticed that the footballs were different last week. About as much sense as David Ortiz getting confused and using Dustin Pedroia’s bat by mistake.

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How quickly things change. And here many of us thought the NFL narrative all week would be about the end of the Packers Seahawks game.

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A Southern California TV station (KSBY) is reporting that former MLB pitcher Ted Lilly has been charged with 3 felony counts of insurance fraud for damaging his $200,000 RV and not filing a claim until he purchased insurance afterwards. But hey, the guy has to feed his family. Lilly only earned about $100 million in his career.

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Kobe Bryant, 36, may soon have season-ending surgery on his torn rotator cuff. But by doing the surgery now Bryant should be healthy enough to start and be injured again next season.

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Marshawn Lynch, unhappy about recent fines, especially one on a teammate, tweeted that he was ” embarrassed to work” for the NFL. Hmm. If he wants to be really embarrassed, Lynch could sign a free agent deal with the Jets.

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Three players were ejected after a fight where punches were thrown in the Alabama-Auburn women’s basketball game last night. And a whole lot of men just put the SEC women’s final on their watch calendar.

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Seems like a lot of the people screaming at Obama for not attending the free speech ‪#‎jesuisCharlie‬ rally in Paris sure have their knickers in a knot over various free speech comments about ‪#‎AmericanSniper‬

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And the gifts just keep on coming. Rick Santorum says he is thinking of running again for President in 2016. No word on when Santorum will decide whether or not to throw his vest into the ring.

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Measles was declared eradicated in 2000. Now, thanks to the anti-vaccine movement, the CDC says that last year doctors in the U.S. diagnosed 644 cases of measles. And some wonder how anti-science politicians get elected….

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In San Francisco today, Jeb Bush acknowledged he is “seriously” considering a run for President. And Hillary Clinton “seriously” congratulated Jeb for saying it with a straight face.

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Surprise package.

December 13, 2014

Give this woman a medal: Thieves stealing packages off doorsteps is an increasing problem in the US. And a D.C. woman got fed up with things she had ordered for the holidays being swiped, so she filled a box with poop from her two dogs and left it on her porch. And yes, a surveillance camera shows a man taking it. Alas no camera shows him opening it.

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What a country. Our newest tourist attraction opening December 20? “Machine Gun America.” It will feature 50 different firearms and 10 fire lanes, Open to customers who are 13 and over. And yeah, you guessed it, Florida.

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Well, then, what’s the problem? Justice Antonin Scalia, when asked about the Citizens United decision: “the amount of money that is spent on all elections — state, local and federal — in the United States, is less than what women spend on cosmetics for a year, OK?” ‪#‎sohowdowegetSupremeCourttermlimit

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Hawaii is trying to lure the Obama Presidential Library with the offer of a location on the beach. Some Republicans are appalled, saying it would be just like President Obama to build his library in a foreign location

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#‎Lakers‬ upset ‪#‎Spurs‬. I think I see a new marketing campaign ahead for ‪#‎Charmin‬. ‪#‎KobeBryant‬

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Bears offensive coordinator Aaron Kromer apologized for being the source behind a negative story about Jay Cutler, but denied telling the NFL Network that Chicago had “buyer’s remorse” about the QB’s $126 million contract. Gosh, Kromer sounds so credible you have to wonder if he’s angling to someday be NFL commissioner.

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Junior Kentucky forward Alex Poythress tore an ACL in practice yesterday and will miss the rest of the season. Sad and a bit shocking, Kentucky had an actual junior on its team?

 

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Some media experts are conceding 2015 World Series title to ‪#‎Dodgers‬. Guess they figure LA will be defending their predicted 2014 title?

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Regarding those leaked emails between the Sony co-chairs, surely they are firing offenses. Not even for the racism. But for being stupid enough to say those sorts of things in written emails.

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Oklahoma State dismissed WR Tyreek Hill from the football team following his arrest for allegedly chocking and punching his pregnant girlfriend. Hill, a junior, ranked 2nd nationally with 996 combined kick return yards. and 11th with 150.9 all-purpose yards per game. So wonder how long before he is offered a second chance with FSU or an SEC team?

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I’m sure all the lower and middle-class voters who elected a GOP Congress this month will be heartened to see that one of the first ways they flexed their new muscles was a rider on a spending bill to lessen the regulatory burdens on our nation’s long suffering banks. ‪#‎sarcasm‬

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Lost Angeles?

November 10, 2014

So much for the ‪#‎Lakers‬’  perfect season.

 

And Charles Barkley’s favorite restaurants are now going “Our long national nightmare is over.”

 

Even ‪#‎Cubs‬ fans feel sorry for ‪#‎Bears‬ fans tonight. ‪#‎GBvsChi‬

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T.C.  (from British Columbia) suggests that most Americans turned off the Packers-Bears rout at half-time. Those who didn’t, who weren’t Green Bay fans, probably thought they had accidentally turned on a replay of a SEC game vs. a nonconference opponent.

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In a crazy world small signs of stability can be a good thing. To that end the Oakland Raiders are doing their part to be the one ‪#‎NFL‬ team that consistently sucks.

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Mark Cuban mused that the Oklahoma Thunder at this point might be better off tanking the season in a “race to the bottom”. And the Raiders are thinking. “Well, that’s one NFL race we’ve won.”

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Many thought the 49ers’ Aldon Smith would have his suspension reduced. This didn’t happen, reportedly because he didn’t do all his “counseling protocol.” So much for all those who say it doesn’t matter if athletes learn to go to class. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

 

 

Not sure if the SF 49ers are going to the playoffs, but after the “Hail Mary” offensive pass interference penalty he drew on Jimmy Graham,  CB Perrish Cox has reportedly been offered a tryout by several professional soccer teams.

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If football games were 58 minutes long ‪#‎Saints‬ would be midseason favorites to win ‪#‎superbowl‬. ‪#‎SFvsNO‬ ‪#‎cantfinish‬

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Freed missionary Kenneth Bae, back in the U.S. from North Korea, said “It’s been an amazing two years, I learned a lot.” Like maybe not to lead tour groups to North Korea?

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Arctic temperature will reach across much of the U.S. this week, with even a chance of snow in D.C. Proving some were right when they said hell would freeze over before we’d see a GOP landslide this year.

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One last thought on last Tuesday’s election. Whatever you think of President Obama’s candidates from both parties tried to hard to distance themselves from him. voters may well have figured at least they’d go for the honest ones.

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Label notation of the year award:  “May have been processed on equipment that was also used to process nuts.”   On a jar of peanut butter.

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A good kid with a gun?

July 30, 2014

A Florida mother has been arrested for letting her seven-year-old son walk to a local park alone, and having the boy carry a cellphone in case of any problems. Well, duh, it’s Florida, she should have sent the kid with a gun.

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Red Lobster is trying to turn around their ailing business by focusing on more attractive plate presentation with their entrees. Right. Would like to see the Venn diagram between those who like to take pictures of their food and Red Lobster customers.

 

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As we near the trade deadline a lot of mediocre players suddenly look very attractive to desperate teams. It’s the MLB equivalent of 15 minutes before closing time.

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This just in. #DavidPrice and #JonLester have still not been traded. And Generalissmo Francisco Franco is still dead.

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Shocking. “The Bachelorette” apparently had sex with two different contestants on the show. Does that make her an honorary guy?

 

(Although some of the former Bachelors are thinking “only two?”)

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The NFL has indicated they will not accept Josh Gordon’s “secondhand marijuana smoke” defense. Probably as well that drug testing didn’t take place during the 1970s. Or the league might have suspended any player who went to Grateful Dead concerts.’

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Adam Silver wants to change the lottery format to allow all 14 teams a relatively equal chance at the #1 pick.. The 76ers are upset, as they were 19-63 last season and were planning to tank again. The rest of the league wonders how the NBA will make this work to give one more #1 pick to the Cavaliers.

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The Chicago Cubs (44-61) beat the Colorado Rockies (43-63  last night in 16 innings. And if you watched the entire game and aren’t related to one of the players, you just might have too much time on your hands.

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#‎Cubs‬ catcher ‪#‎JohnBaker‬ pitched 2 innings tonight, got the win, & scored winning run. Could ‪#‎SFGiants‬ trade for Baker? Need his arm & bat.

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An Indiana man has won a $1 million in the lottery twice in the past three months. So he was still playing? Guess a million doesn’t go as far as it used to. Even in Indiana.

 

The “People’s Choice” awards just announced they will add a special achievement award next year just for Orlando Bloom.

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Eric Chavez retired today. He couldn’t have done it last year and let Yusmeiro Petit throw a perfect game? #SFGiants?

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The Dan Uggla era with the #SFGiants is over as Uggla was released today. It takes some work to have your tenure with a team include less hits (and walks) than errors.   (0-11 with 3 errors.)  Even pitchers are impressed.

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President Obama to Congressional Republicans in a speech today. Stop being mad all the time. Stop just hating all the time. Come on.” And the GOP responded “Hey, lay off our mission statement.”

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Just a few goals past ugly?

July 9, 2014

7-1 final. Germany hasn’t rolled over another country like this since…. oh, does this even need a punchline?
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This Brazil vs. Germany World Cup game should get us all ready for those thrilling September SEC-cupcake matchups.

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How ugly was it looking in Belo Horizonte against the Germans today? Wonder if the Brazilian team considered singing “Edelweiss” and trying to sneak out the back? #toosoon?

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#Dodgers score 5 runs off Justin Verlander in 1st, now trail #Tigers 12-5. Are both teams are taking turns emulating Brazil vs. Germany?

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Rough day for the Brazilian team. Maybe a record day for Caipirinha sales.

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Meanwhile, what a waste. Madison Bumgarner in an AL park with the DH. He was more likely to get a clutch hit than at least a few batters in the #SFGiants lineup.
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Cleveland has been selected as the site for the 2016 Republican Convention. Stand by for “Mistake by the Lake” jokes.

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Sarah Palin recently referred to today’s politics as “incorrigibly disastrous.” Well, if anyone should be an expert on “incorrigibly disastrous…”

(My friend Julia Park Tracey “I didn’t know she was polysyllabic.”)

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Two University of Miami football players, both projected starters, were dismissed from the team after being arrested on sexual battery charges against a “physically helpless” 17-year-old girl. Wonder how long it will take for them to show up “rehabilitated” on another team or on an NFL practice squad?
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This summer TGI Fridays will offer “Endless Appetizers.” $10 a person – no sharing please – unlimited refills of choices including Potato Skins, , Mozzarella Sticks and Boneless Buffalo Wings. Presumably the offer also comes with a free test for Type 2 Diabetes.

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United Airlines has announced they will outsource 630 jobs at 12 U.S. airports in a cost-saving move. So you thought that customer service was bad at Albuquerque; Buffalo; Charleston, Charlotte; Columbus, Ohio; Des Moines,. Detroit, El Paso, Sioux Falls, Wichita, Pensacola and Salt Lake City before…..

Former “Baywatch” star Pamela Anderson has filed for divorce again. So guys, they’re available.
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John Boehner wants another $3.3 million for another House investigation of Benghazi. Not sure what they hope to find out this time, though it now seems pretty certain that if Congress put as much money and effort into protecting our Embassies and Consulates as they are now into “getting” Obama, Ambassador Stevens and the others would be alive today.

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Not the Onion.

June 18, 2014

Texas Governor Rick Perry, interviewed for the NY Times Sunday Magazine, told a reporter “that he loves California, vacations in San Diego annually, visits the state about six times a year and might even move here in January when he’s done with his 14-year stint running Texas.” Where’s a border fence when you REALLY need one?

 

 

You really cannot make this sh*t up. “Rarely has a US president been so wrong about so much at the expense of so many” from an op-ed criticizing Obama’s handling of Iraq. By Dick Cheney

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The US has captured a “key” Benghazi suspect. So just for a day, many in the GOP are saying “Forget Benghazi, let’s talk about Iraq.”

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Tragic, really. Chris Bosh, talking about the Heat’s tough season. “There was no, like, genuine joy all the time. It seemed like work. It was a job the whole year.”

(My friend Jon Nedry says,  Nobody had the “do what you love” talk with him when he was younger?”)

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Oakland starting pitcher Drew Pomeranz, who entered last night’s game with an ERA under 2, broke his right hand punching a chair last night after giving up 8 runs in a loss to the Texas Rangers. And the A’s are in first place. Imagine what Pomeranz might have done if he pitched for the Cubs.

 

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Well, they’re consistent. Former GOP Rep. Allen West of Florida wrote today: “Squirrel! Benghazi suspect conveniently captured to deflect attention from all the other nightmares.” I suppose we only killed Bin Laden for the same reason.

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San Antonio’s Tony Parker -“I think everybody’s gonna come back.” Chairman Peter Holt -“Tim and Manu want to play until they die, somewhat sincerely, actually.” And Brett Favre just went out and bought a Spurs jersey.

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Who needs reality television? In Louisiana, congressman Vance McAllister, who ran on a family values platform and was caught making out on tape with a married staffer, said he wouldn’t run again. But now he is “leaning towards” changing his mind. And one of his declared opponents, Zash Dasher, is the nephew of Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson….. This all must be the fault of gay marriage.

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Rep. Lou Barletta (R-Pa.) said yesterday that the House “probably” has the votes to impeach President Barack Obama if the matter was brought to the floor. Well, it would be a change from the votes to repeal Obamacare.

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A lot of excited new U.S. soccer fans have a question after yesterday’s big win over Ghana. So is this World Cup thing 3 out of 5 or 4 out of 7?

 

While celebrating the #USA win over #Ghana, maybe millions of Americans could take the time to find Ghana on a map. #Geography. #WorldCup

 

 

In California, lawmakers today rejected a bill that would have put a label on sugared sodas, energy drinks and fruit drinks saying “STATE OF CALIFORNIA SAFETY WARNING: Drinking beverages with added sugar(s) contributes to obesity, diabetes, and tooth decay.” Gosh, because now people think they are drinking that stuff for their health?

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Rick Perry, saying he’s “preparing” for 2016 and trying to step away from his comments on gays last week ““Actually it was a pure economic message in San Francisco until a question from the audience.” Well okay then. Because as a candidate for president he’ll never get sidetracked by questions…

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A Senate panel today slammed Dr. Oz for his claims for “miracle” weight loss products – “The scientific community is almost monolithically against you.”. Guessing Dr. Oz will soon demand the hearing be transferred to the GOP-led House.

 

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Well, it doesn’t just happen to the little people. This tweet today “Hey @united landed in Dublin yesterday morning from Newark and still no golf clubs… Sort of need them this week… Can someone help!?” The tweet? Rory McIlroy. And he needs them for the Irish Open….

 

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For whom the polls toll?

June 11, 2014

 

All you need to know about today’s Republican party. Eric Cantor just got knocked out in the GOP primary for being too moderate.

 

Eric Cantor’s team showed him with a 34 point lead over David Brat in late May. Yet another reason for the GOP to discount commie-pinko things like numbers

 

 

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75.8% shooting in the first half by #Spurs. I was watching an #NBAFinals game and an #NBA All Star game broke out

 

 

If someone who was watching their first NBA game tonight was told in advance that it would be an aging team of veterans against a younger team of super stars, assume they would have figured the kids were the Spurs?

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Proof that the World Cup isn’t that big a deal in the U.S.: Brazil’s time zone is only an hour ahead of Eastern Daylight time. But matches will be shown in real time, not tape-delayed and “plausibly live.”

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John Calipari turned down an $80 million, 10 year contract to coach the Cleveland Cavaliers. Meaning that the NCAA is at least a year from putting sanctions on Kentucky.

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TCU (Texas Christian University) beat Pepperdine (a California Christian University) 6-5 yesterday to advance to the College World Series. So did God flip a coin to decide whose prayers to answer?

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The Rays have had three straight shut-out losses. Is Tampa Bay trying to be the official MLB team of the World Cup?

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Colts owner Robert Irsay, awaiting a hearing on his DUI arrest, gave an interview to the Indianapolis Star saying how addiction is a disease, but people don’t get help because of the stigma. Perhaps in his case, but how many people also don’t get help because of the cost of treatment and rehab?

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If the four Americans killed in Benghazi had been on leave in Washington, D.C. and were fatally shot by some crazy guy with a handgun, the GOP would have forgotten about them. #sadbuttrue

 

I’m the least PC liberal I know, but George Will, really?? Talking about “sexual assault” only in quotations and saying that colleges are making “victimhood a coveted status that confers privileges.” Really? Makes Limbaugh’s “slut” comment about a woman using birth control almost seem quaint.

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“America Rising,” a Republican opposition research group, attacked Hillary Clinton for being “someone who is extremely out of touch with the financial reality facing Americans,” because the two homes the Clintons purchased in Chappaqua,and D.C. cost around $4.5 million combined. The best part about this, “America Rising” was started by the former campaign manager for Mitt Romney.

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United Airlines announcement today  “We’re changing the MileagePlus® program to reward our members for their travel spending with United®. And we’re adding new ways to use your award miles, to make the frequent flyer program with the best award availability* even better. Translation, “Most of you are getting screwed.”

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Rolling in the deep.

June 2, 2014

Jacques Cousteau’s grandson is going underwater for 31 days starting next week. It will be a record for the longest time anyone has spent down in the depths. Well, other than the Chicago Cubs.

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A $40 million settlement has been reached for college athletes with NCAA branded video-games. So basketball and football players will receive from between $48 to $951 per year for each year they were on rosters. And presumably the lawyers receive $20 million.

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RIP Ann B. Davis, Alice on the Brady Bunch, who passed away at the age of 88. And this probably has a bigger emotional effect on many late baby-boomers than the death of Maya Angelou.

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For Americans confused and unsure about the negotiations that led to Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl’s release, the GOP has simplified things: “Obama did it, it was wrong.”

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Joe Biden gave the commencement address at the University of Delaware. The speech presumably took place on Saturday and Sunday.

 

Juan Carlos I of Spain will abdicate and hand the crown to his son. And in England the British are telling Queen Elizabeth II “don’t even think of it.”

 

Some in the GOP are demanding hearings into Bowe Bergdahl’s release. Exactly. How dare he not stay in Afghan custody until a Republican is President.

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From Bill Littlejohn  “MLB and Joe Torre have warned Dodger pitchers to pick up their pace, as their games are getting too long. They first became aware when arriving fans at Dodger Stadium started getting there in the first inning instead of the usual third”

 

The NRA said last Friday that Open Carry Texas has gone too far in bringing their guns to restaurants: “‘A small number (of Texans) have recently crossed the line from enthusiasm to downright foolishness.”‘ Wow. The NRA believes there IS a line to cross?

 

 

From T.C. Re: Sofia  Vergara and her fiance have split up. And millions of men around the world are thinking “There’s hope!”  And Marc Ragovin’s “The Mets have fired their hitting coach, Dave Hudgens. We had a hitting coach? asked every member of the team.

TC wants to hire a hitting coach for tips on hitting on Sofiia Vergara.

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125 degrees of separation?

May 16, 2014

FIFA’s president says the Qatar World Cup was a mistake. What was his first clue?

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Tara the cat, the internet sensation who saved a little boy from a dog attack, will now throw out the ceremonial first pitch at a Bakersfield Blaze minor league baseball game. Hey, don’t laugh. The cat probably has a better chance of throwing a decent pitch than the Mets bullpen.

 

A NY Mets employee trying to get “Lion King” tickets for Sandy Alderson’s family accidentally sent the GM’s credit card info in a group email to the NY media today. And as far as embarrassment, this episode will still probably be topped this month by something the Mets do on the field.

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Former Nixon White House aide, Jeb Magruder, 78, who served timed in prison for Watergate, has died. Before sentencing, Magruder had told the judge he had lost his “ethical compass.” And many of the post-Watergate generations reading that now are thinking -“people in politics HAVE ‘ethical compasses’?”

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Barbara Walters said goodbye to “The View.” Friday morning. And most men responded “Barbara Walters was still on TV?”

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A lawyer for supermodel Tyler Beckford’s nephew, who allegedly killed a bus driver after stealing a car and speeding through New York City, said murder charges should be dismissed because the 23 year old was too drunk to know what he was doing. What, the defendant couldn’t afford an “affluenza” defense?

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Lots of excitement over the hiring of new Golden State Warriors coach Steve Kerr. Wonder how long it will be before it’s all his fault.

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Video footage has been released of Heisman winner Jameis Winston allegedly shoplifting crab legs. Maybe the footage can serve as an audition for an endorsement contract with Red Lobster?

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Thursday, May 15, was “National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day.” Which means Friday, May 16 was “The Bleeping Scale Must Be Broken Day.”

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Julio Franco, 55, has signed a contract to be the player-coach for the Fort Worth Cats of the United Baseball League. What’s next for the Cats, trying to sign that nice young man, Jamie Moyer?

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From Marc Ragovin ” 55-year old Julio Franco has signed with the Fort Worth Cats of the Independent League. At his age it should be the Independent Living League.”

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The RNC is selling “I’ll be damned, I’m a Republican” t-shirts. And somewhere Jesus is thinking about his message of tolerance, peace and helping the poor, and thinking “You may be right.”

 

Mixed reviews on the new Godzilla movie, many centering on weaknesses in the plot. And most monster movie fans are thinking “Plot?”

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Crime$ and mi$demeanor$?

May 14, 2014

90 people were arrested today, 50 in Florida, for Medicare fraud schemes estimated to total $260 million. But to be fair, the Florida folks say they were just training to run for Governor.

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The NBA on last night’s OKC-LA officiating hiccup: “There has to be ‘clear and conclusive’ evidence. Since no replay provided such evidence, the play correctly stood as called with the Thunder retaining possession.” Translation, “you really think we’re going to admit to changing the outcome of a playoff game?”

 

The NCAA penalized Oklahoma State because the football program’s Academic Progress Rate score has dropped below the minimum standard. So the Cowboys will lose the equivalent of one day’s practice a week. But OSU avoided worse sanctions, like making the players actually go to class.

 

 

Joran van der Sloot, the main suspect in Natalee Hollowa’s disappearance, is serving a 28-year sentence in Peru for killing a local woman. And now he’s getting MARRIED. To a woman he met while in prison, who is pregnant with his child. Can we title this “Not so smart woman, exceptionally foolish choices.”?

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Really? NY Daily News headline today “Nicole Kidman sparks plastic surgery rumors at Cannes?” So what’s their next headline? “This internet thing could be really big!”?

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MLB changed the call on David Ortiz’s 7th inning hit that fell between two fielders in right field during Yu Darvish’s near no-hitter from an error to a single. Just wondering, if it wasn’t a star like Big Papi, would MLB even have considered it?

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A girl escaped with scrapes and two little boys are in stable condition after wind gusts swept their inflatable bounce house into the air with them inside. Fortunately they fell out relatively quickly although the inflatable house eventually rose 50 feet and drifted several hundred yards before landing. Some will see this story and think “lawsuit”, others will think “how do I make a bounce house do that?”

 

Dallas sports anchor Dale Hansen is back. Not doing much for the Stone Age reputation of older white Southern men: “When Sam was seen celebrating with his family — and boyfriend — the world apparently shook, we almost collided with the sun, and yet SOMEHOW, we have survived another day.”–

 

 

The Missouri legislature just passed legislation requiring women to wait 72 hours to have an abortion. If they really wanted to stop abortion maybe all these mostly male legislators could pass a law making men wait 72 hours to have sex.

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Donald Sterling now says if he can keep the Clippers he won’t have to worry about an NBA players boycott. He really thinks the team will keep playing? Heck, looks like they quit already with a minute left in game five.

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Ben Sasse, who just won the GOP Primary to run for U.S. Senator from Nebraska, says on his website “Government cannot force citizens to violate their religious beliefs under any circumstances. He will fight for the right of all Americans to act in accordance with their conscience.” Let me guess, in all his time at Harvard and Yale, one class Sasse never took was “Comparative Religions?”

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Leland Yee is still on the ballot as running for California Secretary of State. And no doubt more than a few Californians will say “Hey, I know that name from somewhere,” and vote for him.

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The Pac-12 is set to announce that it will move their league championship football game to the 49ers’ new Santa Clara facility. Well, this will guarantee fans at Levi’s stadium the ability to see top college-level talent this year, other than the Redskins in November.

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Time passages.

May 8, 2014

NBC announced Wednesday morning they have extended their Olympics TV deal through 2032. What? They didn’t tape the announcement and show it in prime time?

 

Caleb Johnson on American Idol Wednesday did a great job on “Maybe I’m Amazed.” And wonder how many younger viewers are thinking “Cool. Isn’t that a hit from the guy who used to be with Wings?”

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Charlie Crist said he left the GOP because it is now seen as “anti-women, anti-minority, anti-women, anti-gay, anti-education, anti-environment,” and because leadership “went off a cliff.” Crist better watch it, he might be making way too much sense to be elected in Florida.

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CNN is reporting that Sarah Palin says Hillary Clinton will likely reconsider her position on abortion rights now that her daughter is pregnant. And many Americans seeing another Sarah Palin story are thinking, “Can’t you go back to coverage of MH370?”

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Bizarre factoid of the day. Most Americans probably don’t know the Prime Minister of Canada. But they know the Mayor of Toronto.

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Johnny Manziel is saying that teams who pass on him in the draft will regret it. Even Richard Sherman is saying, “Dude, less is more.”

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Target’s interim CEO John Mulligan “Our guests can shop with confidence at Target.” Wonder if he added under his breath “If they pay cash.”

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Venture capitalist Tim Draper “When you work for your government, when your government forces you to do something, it’s slavery. We need to take it back.” Right, because if he didn’t live in California, instead of ending up a billionaire, Tim feels he might be a trillionaire by now?

 

Male whine of the day. .MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough,”This is not about Bill Clinton This is about the women who were eviscerating Monica Lewinsky, who for 18 years was quiet and, by the way, lived a life of shame and her entire existence reduced to a punchline,” Well, no one is claiming Bill is a saint. But it’s wrong to say that a 22 year old woman was capable of making her own bad choices?

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Tim Lincecum is doing a great job of pitching to contact. Unfortunately the contact he is pitching to is the wall.  #SFGiants.

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Hillary Clinton, when asked today if she is running for President in 2016. “I am somebody who really has to mull things over. Stay tuned. When I know, you’ll know.” Even Brett Favre is thinking “Jeez, lady, make up your mind.”

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A dinosaur threw out the first pitch at today’s Padres game. Saw that headline and thought “But Jamie Moyer didn’t even play for San Diego.”

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Stay classy. Former Dodgers’ manager Tommy Lasorda, a friend of Donald Sterling, said of V. Stiviano “I don’t wish that girl any bad luck, but I hope she gets hit with a car.” Hate to hear what Tommy hoped about any of the SF Giants when they won the World Series in recent years.

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Something missing?

May 5, 2014

Tiger Woods said that missing the Masters wasn’t that bad. “Speak for yourself” said CBS.

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Didn’t everyone have this figured? NL pitching leaders as of May 5 with 5 wins – Greinke, Wainwright, Machi… #SFGiants

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The Supreme Court ruled today that city councils can begin their meetings with prayer, even if it plainly favors a specific religion. Okay, so let’s see what happens when some council decides to include, say, a Buddhist or Muslim prayer…

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Who says politicians are never honest? Lindsay Graham – “Our Democratic friends, for the most part, have been in the tank over Benghazi. Some guy said this about me yesterday on the left: The only reason I cared about this was because I have six tea party opponents. Well, if that’s true, I’m the biggest scumbag in America.”

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Saturday was the Kentucky Derby, Monday was Cinco de Mayo. Which for many Americans means finding out the answer to a question – do you get a worse hangover from bourbon or tequila?

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Governor Chris Christie on the Brooklyn Nets “They’re not in New Jersey anymore. They’re not my team — I’m a Knicks fan. And so the fact is, I just don’t care.” Makes sense that Christie would root for the Knicks, their year has made his look good by comparison.

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Former PayPal exec Rakesh “Rocky” Agrawal is no longer with the company after sending out late night tweets saying amongst other things that PayPal’s global communications VP was a “useless middle. manager” and a “piece of s***.” Agrawal says he quit before tweeting, but just guessing he’s not expecting a reference?

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A Hong Kong company has come up with a new “Paper Clip” armrest for planes, which has a double decker format they say will eliminate the armrest battles most fliers face regularly. Wonder which U.S. carrier will try it first, presumably as soon as they figure out how to charge an “arm room fee.”

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You really cannot make this “stuff” up: .Steve Wiles is running in the GOP primary for North Carolina state Senate, touting his support for a gay marriage ban. And the Winston-Salem Journal is reporting Wiles worked for years as a drag queen emcee known as ‘Miss Mona Sinclair’ at a Winston-Salem gay bar.

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Jameis Winston apparently was carrying crawfish, crab legs and butter when he walked out of a Florida Publix without paying. But the Heisman winner insisted he did not steal the butter, because he left it in a bin before he left the store. Maybe that explains why FSU has already reinstated him?

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Stay classy. Stacey Campfield, the Tennessee state senator who once said HIV and AIDS originated from a man having sex with a monkey, just wrote in his blog “Democrats bragging about the number of mandatory sign ups for Obamacare is like Germans bragging about the number of manditory sign ups for ‘train rides’ for Jews in the 40s.”

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From my funny friend Jerry Perisho: Oregon State fired head basketball coach Craig Robinson, the brother-in-law of Pres. Obama. Fox News said the firing was part of the Republican resurgence. MSNBC said it was due to right wing radicalism on campus. CNN said, “Oregon is nowhere near the Indian Ocean, so we don’t care.

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For some variety, Dwight Perry’s sideline chatter.  (And he included one of my jokes)

http://seattletimes.com/html/sidelinechatter/2023524610_chatter04xml.html

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What’$ in a name?

January 28, 2014

A New Jersey couple is auctioning off the rights to name their baby girl, with bids starting at $20,000. Wonder how much of the proceeds they are setting aside for future therapy.

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Southwest Airlines announced today they will start flying to Aruba, the Bahamas and Jamaica. Hope they have comprehensive pilot training first… from the air those Caribbean islands all kind of look alike.

 

 

Five pro-marijuana billboards are supposed to be set up around Met Life Stadium for the Super Bowl. And if serious pot-heads are in charge, at least four of the billboards should be up by February 3.

 

 

You can’t make this “stuff” up. One thing missing at Met Life Stadium this Super Bowl, will be the Met Life blimp. Because the weather will be too cold and dangerous for it to fly…..

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Ticket prices to the Super Bowl on sites like Stubhub are apparently falling rapidly this week. Let’s see. A chance to stand in long security lines to sit outside in the cold and possible snow for 4-5 hours, for a view that won’t be as good as on a big-screen TV at home. This after you’ve figured out New Jersey Transit or the bus system because there are no parking passes and taxis aren’t allowed within a mile of the stadium…. Can’t imagine why.

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Stephen Glass, who was fired from the New Republic in the 90s for fabricating parts of almost every article he wrote, went to law school and passed the bar. After New York turned him down he came West, where he has been trying to “demonstrate the moral character required to practice law in California.” Today the State Supreme Court turned him down. Some cynics would say he has demonstrated EXACTLY the moral character of many lawyers in California….

(Wonder how many job offers Glass has gotten from the banking industry. Or Wall Street?)

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Just for the fun of it can some member of the “lame-stream” media ask Sarah Palin what she thinks of the Arizona Republican Party censuring John McCain for being too liberal?

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Meanwhile in Virginia,  former GOP senator John Warner has endorsed Dem. Mark Warner for a second term in the U.S. Senate. So how long will it take the Arizona Republican party to censure him too?

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Sochi mayor Anatoly Pakhomov on gay people – “It’s not accepted here in the Caucasus where we live. We do not have them in our city.” Is he angling for a guest spot on Duck Dynasty?

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GOP Rep. Trey Radel of Florida, who pleaded guilty to cocaine possession in November, will resign from Congress today. The most disappointed people? Democrats who were lining up to run against him.

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Seemed like the players were a bit more into the Pro Bowl this year. But want to get them to be REALLY competitive? Losing team players have to keep wearing those uniforms at least through next year’s pre-season games.

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Guess I’m an old fogie now because I remember when people used to debate Grammy acts based on what they actually sounded like, instead of what they wore and how outrageous their visuals were….

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Royal Caribbean is cancelling a cruise over hundreds getting the norovirus. But maybe they have it all wrong. Maybe the line should market the ship as “The only cruise where you’re guaranteed to actually LOSE weight.”

 

In the German town of Rasdorf, a farm shed caught fire and exploded, reportedly due to methane gas from 90 flatulent cows. The cows all survived, although one was treated for burns. Maybe it was a bad idea to give old lady Leary that lantern.

 

 

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Only one more shopping day

December 20, 2013

Until the first NCAA football FBS bowl game of the year.

 

And if you know the name of the game, and who’s playing, and you’re not an alum of either team…. you probably have two much time on your hands.

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The NFL said today it “strongly opposes” the FCC trying to end their 40-year sports blackout rule. Right. Because the average team only made $44 million in operating profit last year. (Source – Forbes) The owners have to feed their families.

 

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Kobe Bryant, who just returned from a torn Achilles, has fractured his knee and will miss at least six weeks. So wonder how much Jack Nicholson is offering for courtside seats to the Clippers?

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Olympic figure skating champion Brian Boitano came out as gay today. “I’m shocked” said absolutely nobody.

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Whatever you think of President Obama, sending Russia a U.S delegation w/ ,  &  does perhaps rank as the most elegant one, or rather three-finger salute of his presidency.

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Pope Francis now has stated that he supports breastfeeding and he is okay with women doing it in public. Can we start a pool on when Rush Limbaugh’s head will explode?

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Airbus, which would like airlines who buy their planes to put fewer seats in them, did a recent study of passengers. 54% said “an increase of comfort in economy class was critical or absolutely critical.” Perhaps those 54% should have a more reasonable dream – like winning the lottery.

 

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As a British phone hacking scandal broadens, now it’s been revealed that Prince William referred to Kate as “babykins.” The Palace is not amused, but hey, on the other hand, an heir to the throne saying sweet nothings to his own wife…..

 

 

John Boehner is calling out “conservative groups”, Peter King said Rand Paul owes “that patriot,” NID Director James Clapper, an apology for saying he should resign for “lying” to a Senate committee about govt surveillance, and Glenn Beck called Chris Christie a “fat nightmare.”   Remember when not belonging to any organized party meant being a Democrat?

Somewhere Will Rogers is smiling.

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So the government apparently has had access to some of our phone calls. On the other hand, in the private sector, Target apparently allowed access to 40 million Americans’ credit cards.

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Fortunately there appear to be no fatalities after the roof collapsed at London’s Apollo Theatre tonight during a performance of “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. although as many as 80 people may have been injured. But think of all the men who reluctantly went along with their wives who had said “Honey, just come with me to one show, how much could it hurt?”

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“Duck Dynasty” is on hiatus, after their star was suspended for anti-gay comments. So what are viewers to do who find “Honey Boo-Boo” too intellectual?

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Well of course she did. Sarah Palin has defended Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson: “Free speech is an endangered species. Those ‘intolerants’ hatin’ and taking on the Duck Dynasty patriarch for voicing his personal opinion are taking on all of us.” Right. Free speech is important… unless it’s from anyone taking on Sarah herself.

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So this is what Phil Robertson actually said when asked what is sinful. “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men.” Uh, START with homosexual behavior? Why didn’t he start with “sleeping around?” Except that that would alienate too many of his fellow conservatives, including the junior senator from his home state of Louisiana.

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Economic Stimulus?

December 4, 2013

About $500 million spent on free agents this offseason in MLB and the Yankees have spent about half of it. 28 teams are aghast. And the Dodgers are thinking “We can top this.”

 

 

Cyber Monday, Giving Tuesday, What’s next “Back To Work Wednesday?”

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Two security guards at Houston’s Reliant Stadium were fired for having their pictures taken with Tom Brady. Maybe the team should have cut the guys a break, it’s not like any reasonable person would want a picture taken with one of this year’s Texans

 

The best news for t-shirt vendors near Fenway Park tonight. They can print over all the “Johnny Damon traitor/Judas” shirts and substitute “Jacoby Ellsbury.

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Jacoby Ellsbury has signed a 7 year, $153 million contract with the Yankees. This is apparently part of the new NY strategy – “Austerity as long as we are not competing with the Red Sox.”

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A new study shows U.S. students well below average compared to the rest of the world in math, particularly in their ability to apply mathematics to real world situations. No kidding. As at FedEx field Sunday where we saw issues with counting to 10 and even 4.

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Brett Favre is the offensive coordinator for Oak Grove High School in Hattiesburg, MS, and his team is playing in the state championship Friday. The real question, how does Favre make play-calling decisions in time to avoid delay of game penalties?

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Arizona coach Bruce Arians sent 15 plays to the NFL to highlighting “obvious” officiating errors during the Cardinals 24-21 loss to the Eagles. Wonder if the officials sent back a list of 15 or more “obvious” coaching errors.

 

 

The Washington, D.C. tree was formally lit Tuesday night. The way things are going in our nation’s capitol, wonder if President Obama had to threaten a nuclear option to prevent John Boehrner from subjecting the tree to a filibuster.

 

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While he declined to attend, Peyton Manning took the time to sign and return a wedding invitation sent to him by a “lifelong fan.” Nice to see an NFL player making news for signing something other than a citation or bail contract.

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The California GOP is taking some heat for a fake Obamacare website. (coveringhealthcareca.com as opposed to the real coveredca.com) Wonder how long it will take an confused out-of-state Republican to trash the site as not working correctly.

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Delta Airlines bumped 50 passengers at Gainesville Airport when they used their plane to accommodate the University of Florida men’s basketball team, whose charter had a mechanical problem. That’s the basketball team. Had it been the UF football team this year, Delta probably would have put them on a Greyhound bus.

 

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Paul Walker seemed like a really cool guy who did a lot of good with his stardom. And he died way too young. But as far as it being a tragedy? Mechanical or not, racing or not, that car was going really really fast. The real tragedy would have been if they spun out of control and hit another car or innocent bystanders crossing the street… IMHO

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Friday Night No Lights ?

October 25, 2013

So tonight, no MLB postseason baseball, no NFL football. In other words, recent business as usual in Southern California.

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And so far, two very sloppy games. But then you can’t spell #WorldSeries without “E”s.

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In a recent interview, Brett Favre said ‘God only knows the toll’ (with his concussions) and admitted forgetting some details about his family life. Of course, there’s a name for people who forget that kind of detail. They’re called “men.”

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The GOP keeps attacking Obamacare. In part no doubt because they think Americans would be better off with the great Republican alternative healthcare reform plan that the party has put forward in great detail…. Oops, never mind.

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Cory Vaughn, a Mets minor leaguer currently playing for the Scottsdale Scorpions in the Arizona Fall League, is recovering after being bit in the leg by a scorpion. Good thing the kid doesn’t play for a team affiliated with the Detroit Tigers.

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Ted Cruz has railed against other members of Congress and staffers for accepting federal health insurance support. No doubt he’d prefer to pay his own way, except it turns out that Ted gets health insurance though his wife, who is an executive at Goldman Sachs….

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Kraft has recalled some of their cheese products after they changed color and showed signs of spoilage before their expiration date. Shocking !   Kraft actually created cheese products that had an expiration date?

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According to USA Today, U.S. Patent and Trademark Office received a registration application for the name “Washington Bravehearts” for the purpose of “Entertainment in the nature of football games.” The Redskins claim they have nothing to do with it. Makes sense, it’s the team’s long suffering fans who truly need to be bravehearted.

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The GOP chair of a North Carolina county precinct apparently was forced resign yesterday after an interview aired on the Daily Show where he defended tougher voter ID rules and said “if it hurts a bunch of lazy blacks who want the government to give them everything so be it.” Wonder if he had to resign for the racism or the stupidity .

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Now that pictures have surfaced of Doug Gansler’s hanging out at his son’s graduation party with underage drinkers, the Maryland attorney general (and gubernatorial candidate) is saying, several days later, that he made a mistake by not trying to stop the party. Uh, what he means is, he made a mistake by not realizing these days that EVERYTHING gets posted online.

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This is the same Gansler who made a public service commercial saying parents are the leading influence on their kids’ behavior when it comes to alcohol, noting, “It’s never too early to talk to your kids about smart ways to say, `No.”‘.   Uh and it’s also never too early to say “I made a mistake.”

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Rumors out of Tampa say the Buccaneers coach Greg Schiano may be fired before the end of the year. In Schiano’s favor, not sure who Tampa Bay could get instead willing to take over that mess.

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Ah yes, the private sector. United Airlines cancels a flight from SF to JFK tomorrow for “airport conditions.” Computer doesn’t rebook passengers. No options within several hours. Called them to negotiate Newark as an option. While talking to the agent, United puts in a new flight SF to JFK a few minutes after the cancelled flight. Still doesn’t rebook cancelled passengers on it. In fact, says the flight is sold out in the booked class. 15 minutes later supervisor gets it done manually. (So did the ACA designers use an airline website model?)

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Rock bottom.

October 21, 2013

The Boy Scouts have removed the 2 men who toppled the ancient rock formation in Utah from their posts as scout leaders. No doubt giving thousands of idiots a good lesson – if you’re going to do something that stupid, don’t put it on YouTube.

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The Houston Texans released rookies Sam Montgomery, Cierre Wood and Willie Jefferson, allegedly for smoking marijuana. Wonder if the three could be picked up by the Seahawks or Broncos?.

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And go figure, smoke pot in the NFL and you get released?  Take steroids and you get suspended a few games but make it back for the playoffs.

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It was pretty clear after four days that people in the SF Bay Area missed #BART a lot more than they missed the federal government.

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The BART strike is over. Now let’s see if both sides can recover from the plague millions of Californians have wished upon their houses.

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So how did the Minnesota Vikings and NY Giants coaches motivate their teams for MNF?    Winner might vault to the top of the BCS standings?

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Jim Leyland is stepping down as the Detroit Tigers’ manager. Wonder if those late-inning relief ALCS pitching meltdowns were the tipping point. If so, guess the Tigers’ won’t be interviewing Dusty Baker.

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Stanford graduate Andrew Luck, after the Colts win over the Broncos yesterday. “We didn’t let the outside sphere of influence creep into the locker room.” Can’t imagine how Luck gets that nerdy reputation.

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The ghost of Russ Hodges: “The Giants win a game, the Giants win a game”

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So when Marissa Mayer changed the work at home policy at Yahoo, it was pretty clear she didn’t have childcare issues. Now with the latest update, pretty clear she doesn’t use Yahoo mail either.

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Stories out of Texas indicate that Senator Ted Cruz is still popular in the state after leading the U.S. into a shutdown. So where is Rick Perry and his talk of secession when we really need him?

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Gov. Chris Christie is withdrawing his appeal of the recent ruling in favor of gay marriage in New Jersey. Christie says he has a “constitutional obligation to enforce the law.” That and apparently he can read the national poll numbers.

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Oregon’s defensive coordinator apologized for calling Washington State coach Mike Leach “low class” for leaving in his starters and throwing for two late TDs in the Ducks 62-38 win, saying “There’s no excuse, but sometimes right after the game the adrenaline is still flowing and I made a huge, human error in judgment. I wish I could take it back, and I promise it won’t happen again.” Possible translation “I was reminded we might want to run up the score ourselves later this season to impress BCS voters..”.

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Semi-serious stuff below . You have been warned…

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Today’s 12 year-old school shooter apparently got a handgun from his parents. Just wondering, if we prosecuted parents for the crimes of their minor children using their guns, and EVERY time a child accidentally shoots themselves or someone else, think folks might try a little higher to keep their weapons in a safe place?

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Lawyers for James Holmes, the man accused of killing 12 and wounding 70 in the Aurora, CO theater, are arguing that after the shooting police coerced and misled him into talking to them about bombs found in his apartment, and said his statements shouldn’t be used against him. Right. So maybe a dozen or more lives were saved but the cops were out of line. Yet another example of why attorneys are so beloved in the US.

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What happened to Adrian Peterson’s two year old son is a tragedy. But anyone but me having a bit of a hard time with the all the sympathy for the Vikings star when he had only found out the kid existed a couple months ago, and never met his son until the toddler was dying in the hospital?

 

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VOTE and other four letter words….

October 7, 2013

John Boehner this morning: “The votes are not in the House to pass a clean debt limit.” Gosh. If there were only a simple way to find out whether or not the Speaker is right.

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And Boehner says while refusing to let the House vote on a clean bill simply to end the shutdown, President Obama “has my number.” What? 1-800-Douchebag?

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Canadian-born Texas Senator Ted Cruz today linked raising the debt ceiling to defunding Obamacare. Amazing, a man born in a country where everyone has healthcare, working in a job where everyone has healthcare, doesn’t think everyone else deserves healthcare.

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Bizarre fact about Stanford football this year. The only game that is not sold out is the “Big Game” against Berkeley. Of course, as my friend Michael McNabb put it, “Cal is taking a bye year.”

Back to sports for a bit:

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#AndrewLuck does what his former coach couldn’t do this year. Beat Pete Carroll and the Seahawks.

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Pittsburgh Pirates team payroll, about $66 million. $7 million less than A-Rod, Vernon Wells and Alfonso Soriano by themselves.

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Okay, who had the New Orleans Saints and KC Chiefs 5-0 and the NY Giants 0-5? Now all you liars put your hands down.

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51-48.  So who decided that today the Cowboys and Broncos were going to play arena football?

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A 9-year-old boy got through security and onto a Delta Air Lines flight at Minneapolis Airport without a ticket this week. But no doubt TSA found and confiscated his bottle of water?

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Manti T’eo and the San Diego Chargers played the Raiders in Oakland Sunday night, and fans in the “Black Hole” had a banner ready: ““R.I.P. Lennay Kekua.” Well, that might answer one question, where do Stanford Band members go after they graduate?

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From Jim Barach  “California youth football league will start to fine teams that win games by more than 35 points. The ruling has caused three of the teams to cancel games they had scheduled against the Jacksonville Jaguars.”

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A California youth football league will start to fine teams that win games by more than 35 points. The ruling has caused three of the teams to cancel games they had scheduled against the Jacksonville Jaguars. – See more at: http://hqprincegeorge.com/home/hart_attack/news/v/Local/272724/Hartley-Miller-s-Hart-Attack-October-4-2013-Edition-439#sthash.4IcKrR46.dpuf

A California youth football league will start to fine teams that win games by more than 35 points. The ruling has caused three of the teams to cancel games they had scheduled against the Jacksonville Jaguars.

Jim Barach of WCH

– See more at: http://hqprincegeorge.com/home/hart_attack/news/v/Local/272724/Hartley-Miller-s-Hart-Attack-October-4-2013-Edition-439#sthash.4IcKrR46.dpuf

At the California GOP convention, many attendees said they were worried about mid-term elections after this shutdown to repeal Obamacare. Well, maybe Boehner will just lead the next shutdown to try to repeal the 19th amendment.

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British newspapers are reporting that Prince Harry may soon marry his girlfriend Cressida Bonas. Prompting a singular response from male British royal watchers – WWPW – What will Pippa Wear?

 

Apparently U.S. forces have captured a major Al Qaeda leader in Libya, a man who was wanted for the 1998 bombings of U.S. embassies in Africa. Finally, something for which the GOP will not blame Obama.

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Games people play

October 5, 2013

Now John Boehner is urging President Obama to negotiate on the shutdown, saying “This is not some damn game.” Well, if it’s not some damn game, why doesn’t the Speaker simply call a damn vote.

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Apparently the elevators at O.co Coliseum have already had issues. Everyone has fingers crossed for the plumbing. When they talk about if Oakland can make it to game 5 or 7 in a series, they may really mean whether the stadium will hold up that long.

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If you don’t have a NL team to root for to get to the World Series, may I suggest Pittsburgh. Not only are the Pirates the underdogs, but they have a fun young team, a beautiful stadium, and oh yeah, it will drive ratings-hungry Fox television executives crazy.

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Dusty Baker was fired by the Reds when Cincinnati once again failed to make it out of the first round, in their third playoff appearance in the last four years. Three in the last four years. Somewhere Cubs fans are just weeping.

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The Atlanta Braves didn’t even sell out their playoff game Thursday night. Maybe to increase attendance they should play during the halftime of a University of Georgia football game?

 

This Max Scherzer guy is pretty good. Maybe if ESPN and FOX hadn’t been so focused on Yankees-Red Sox more Americans might care about the ALDS because they would have seen the Tigers, and for that matter the As, play several games.

 

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LA Dodgers hit into so many double plays Friday night; if it weren’t for the color of their uniforms fans might think they are watching the 2013 SF Giants.

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Alex Rodriguez is now suing Bud Selig. Any way they can both lose? #douchebags

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A-Rod says in his lawsuit that ‘MLB is trying to destroy me.” Methinks the Yankees slugger is doing a pretty good job of that by himself.

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Friday night, Alex Rodriguez filed his second lawsuit of the day. This time against the Yankees team doctor and the hospital for misdiagnosing his left hip injury during the 2012 playoffs. Shame A-Rod’s lawyers can’t file a lawsuit against the guy in his mirror.

 

Jesse Ventura said on CNN’s Crossfire tonight that he might run for President in 2016. Even Donald Trump is thinking “You’re delusional.”

 

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Another thought on the GOP government shutdown “Kamikaze missions rarely turn out well, least of all for the pilots.” From the editorial pages of that commie pinko rag, the Wall Street Journal.

 

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Penn Gov. Tom Corbett, asked about his lawyers’ statement comparing legalizing gay marriage to legalizing marriage for children “It was an inappropriate analogy. I think a much better analogy would have been brother and sister.” So what is Corbett doing? Trying to divert media attention from the crazies in Congress?

 

 

 

Let them eat cake, after they put in on layaway first?   Nebraska GOP Rep. Lee Terry on still accepting his salary during the shutdown: “Dang straight. I’ve got a nice house and a kid in college, and I’ll tell you we cannot handle it. Giving our paycheck away when you still worked and earned it? That’s just not going to fly.”

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