Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ category

You unlock this door with a key…..

July 23, 2016

So will the video highlights and lowlights of the #SFGiants week since the the All-Star break be narrated by Rod Serling?

(younger friends readers can ignore this Twilight Zone reference.)

SF Giants not only got their first win in a week, they had their first lead in a game in a week.  They have now held a lead for exactly one inning since the All-Star break.

 

Pitcher Chris Sale was scratched and sent home from his star today following that the White Sox said was “a “non-physical clubhouse incident.”
Hmm, if they they trade Sales to the Nationals who have Papelbon will Washington become the first clubhouse with thermo-nuclear capability?

 

You really cannot make this “stuff” up. Chris Sale apparently was scratched from tonight’s start because he decided he didn’t like the throwback uniforms, and cut them up, with a knife. ‪#‎Ifonlyhewasarmed‬

An Oklahoma City Store is selling Kevin Durant jerseys for 48 cents. Are they selling them in the BBQ section as kindling?

Trump’s original statement on Munich shootings: “This cannot continue. The rise of terrorism threatens the way of life for all civilized people, and we must do everything in our power to keep it from our shores.”
Uh, what about mental illness, and guns? Or for that matter bullying? Those aren’t in his platform.

 

HillaryClinton‬‘s pick of ‪#‎TimKaine‬ must have been pretty good, ‪#‎Trump‬ is back to tweeting about ‪#‎Pocahontas‬ again.

 

Forget to the “right” or “left,” ‪#‎TimKaine‬ pushes ‪#‎Hillary‬ ticket to more “likable. ‪#‎ClintonKaine‬

Thinking a lot of people are going to go from “Tim who?” to “Smart choice” really fast in this election. ‪#‎ClintonKaine‬

 

#‎Trump‬ loves ‪#‎Sanders‬ since he’s not on the ticket, if ‪#‎Hillary‬ had chosen ‪#‎Bernie‬ the Donald would be tweeting today about communism

 

 

 

 

So DNC emails to my mind reveal more political infighting than any real difference making in the 2016 Primaries. But putting that sort of stuff in writing? Have no problem if Debbie Wasserman Schultz ends up being told to fall on her sword for this one. ‪#‎couldbeawinwin‬ ‪#‎cantfixstupid

 

17 people were injured when a ferry from the World Financial Center made a rough landing in Jersey City tonight. Most of the injuries were minor, at least compared to being stuck in New Jersey.

 

 

 

from JD – singalong  time?

 

Oloompa, doompadee doo:
I’ve got a brand-new puzzle for you.
Oompa, loompa, doompadah dee:
if you are wise, you’ll listen to me.

What do you get with a Trump and a Pence?
Lies and resentment and sound without sense.
Staying up late just to vent all that hate
won’t help to make our country great.
(Shouldn’t this be obvious?)

Oompa loompa doompadee damn:
most of us know that it’s all a scam.
Want to help our country improve?
Dumping Donald Trump should be your first move.

KaineTouchThis?

July 22, 2016

Hillary Clinton has selected Tim Kaine as her running mate. #YesWeKaine

 

Donald Trump “Tim Kaine may be fluent in Spanish but he can’t make a taco bowl as good as the one in Trump Tower.”

So ‪#‎Panik‬ on DL, ‪#‎Duffy‬ on DL, and the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ gold-glove winning shortstop is the one who makes 3 errors in game….‪#‎WTF‬ #SFGiants

If Bochy had resisted the urge to use DH, ‪#‎Madbum‬ would have been up in bottom of 4th with bases loaded instead of Blanco. ‪#‎SFGiants‬.

Fortunately since he is not pitching Saturday Madison Bumgarner is available to pinch hit.

RIP‬ ‪#‎DennisGreen‬. Stanford fans remember him for the important things – he went 3-0 in Big Games, and his 1990 team upset #1 Notre Dame.

Many Americans are unaware that ‪#‎HillaryClinton‬ is a year younger than ‪#‎DonaldTrump‬. Maybe because she has an age appropriate spouse?

Alas, it’s been almost 10 years since we lost the woman who really should have been commenting on Trump’s speech, but her comment on Pat Buchanan’s speech from 1992 will do just fine: “It probably sounded better in the original German.” ‪#‎MollyIvins‬

But here’s the 2016 quote:  “I’m overjoyed to see Donald Trump and most Americans embrace most of the issues that I’ve championed for years. My slogan remains America first.” David Duke

Yep, she’s the Donald’s daughter alright. After her speech last night, Ivanka Trump posted a tweet. About her policies, promises, politics.. ? Nope.
“Shop Ivanka’s look from her ‪#‎RNC‬ speech” with a link where to buy the dress at Macy’s.

The dress ‪#‎IvankaTrump‬ wore for her speech last night, from her own clothing line, was made in China. ‪#‎MakeAmericaFakeAgain‬

 

#‎IvankaTrump‬ did look pretty in dress at ‪#‎RNC‬ from her own clothing line Wonder if she looked like fairy princess to children who made it?

 

How often do I say this, but well played ‪#‎STLCards‬, well played! ‪#‎silverlining‬ in a tough week. 16 innings against ‪#‎Dodg-ers‬. ‪#‎SFGiants‬

Knicks point guard Derrick Rose “With these teams right now, they’re saying us and Golden State are the super teams, and they’re trying not to build that many super teams.”
Uh, is Rose daring the NBA to drug test him?

 

One of ‪#‎Trump‬‘s tweets last night – “This is a movement.” Yes, a bowel movement. ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

So in all seriousness, we heard a lot last night about how much Trump’s employees adored him. But I’ve been in the travel industry a long time, never heard any of the love – have gotten things like this direct quote from an unidentified employee at an unidentified Trump hotel – back in 2012 -“Just so you know he does not own the hotel – we all hate his policies!!!!”

And a contender for airline euphemism for the day, from Southwest. “We continue to manage through lingering disruptions following performance issues across multiple technology systems Wednesday,”
Translation, “We’re still cleaning up from our complete bleeping computer crash.”

Not a dream

July 21, 2016

 

“I gratefully accept your nomination for President of United States”. So okay, who was holding out a shred of hope ‪#‎Trump‬ might say “Just kidding?

So regarding the hashtag ‪#‎TrumpIsWithYou‬. Can America get a restraining order?

So somehow I missed the part about poor young American women having modeling jobs taken from them by immigrants. ‪#‎TrumpSpeech‬

Just guessing during this campaign that ‪#‎Trump‬ is not going to be plagiarizing Teddy Roosevelt on that “speak softly” part.

If ‪#‎Trump‬ is half as wonderful a boss to little people as his daughter claims wonder why 1 or 2 of them aren’t speaking at ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ ?

Tom Barrack, about Trump “You learn how to be a man by watching your father.” So does that mean Donald Jr, and Eric will soon be trading in their wives for younger models?

“When you have my father in your corner you will never have to worry about being let down”. Unless you married him. ‪#‎Ivanka

 

If America really wants an orange president is it too late to draft an oompa loompa?

If America was half as bad as ‪#‎Trump‬ is saying tonight why are all these immigrants trying to come here?

 

Now I understand why ‪#‎Trump‬ is so orange. Because it makes it impossible to tell how red he is in the face.

So wonder how many of those ‪#‎RNC‬ delegates who actually cheered Trump talking about ‪#‎LGBTQ‬ community knew he was talking about gay people?

Trump Campaign chief Paul Manafort on sexism allegations, some women will vote Trump because their HUSBANDS “have trouble paying for family bills,”

 

Wonder how many reasonable Republicans are wondering how quickly we could repeal the 22nd amendment? ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ ‪#‎Trump‬ ‪#‎Obama3rdterm‬

Uh, does ‪#‎Trump‬ know that ‪#‎MikePence‬ did such a good job in Indiana that he might not have been re-elected this November?

So ‪#‎Ivanka‬ takes about “affordable and accessible child care.” Uh, has she listened to her father about that wall? ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

Is this what it felt like to be watching in early 1930s Germany? ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

 

#‎SFGiants‬ had night off. Fans who turned in to ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ discovered there are scarier things than Casilla coming in with a 1 run lead.

To extend her 15 minutes, ‪#‎RielleHunter‬ brings 8-yr-old daughter w/ ‪#‎JohnEdwards‬ on ‪#‎GMA‬. Reminds us both ‪#‎Dems‬ & ‪#‎GOP‬ make bad VP choices.

Rielle Hunter, John Edwards’ former mistress, has written a book children’s book, let their 8-yr-old daughter illustrate it, and has now given an interview with Good Morning America, along with the kid by her side, on what “great co-parents” she and her ex-lover are.
Uh, just thinking even a semi-great parent wouldn’t throw a poor little girl who was born into pretty embarrassing circumstances, into the public eye. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎cantfixnarcissisticeither‬.

Many RNC delegates thought ‪#‎TedCruz‬ was condescending, and that’s before they had to look up “servile.” ‪#‎servilepuppydog‬ ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

 

Now it looks like not only does Melania Trump not have a college degree in design and architecture as claimed, she may not even have attended university. So maybe she didn’t even learn there was a thing called “plagiarism.”

Silly commotion over ‪#‎MegynKelly‬‘s top at ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ yesterday. Could have been worse, person in skimpy outfit could’ve been ‪#‎ChrisChristie‬

Ted Cruz is being attacked by many at the RNC for saying last night to “vote your conscience.” For implying that most of them HAVE a conscience?

 

Reports are that the NBA is moving the 2017 All-Star game from Charlotte to New Orleans over North Carolina’s anti-LGBT law. And guessing players are thrilled over this display of progressive values- who wouldn’t prefer to spend the week in New Orleans?

MLB commissioner Rob Manfred talked today about limiting the use of relievers “Our relief pitchers have become so dominate at the back end that they actually rob action out of the end of the game, the last few innings of the game.”
Uh, clearly Manfred hasn’t been staying up late enough to watch many SF Giants games.

Today is ‪#‎NationalJunkFoodDay‬ Come on, this is America, EVERY day is National Junk Food Day.

A new company has developed, “Modobag,” which they say is the world’s first rideable motorized luggage And you think travelers rushing through the airports while looking at their phones are a menace now

Dreaming?

July 20, 2016

Right about now after the last week both the SF Giants and GOP have to be hoping to see Bobby come out of that shower.  #Dallas

#‎SFGiants‬ have had the lead in exactly one inning since the All-Star break.

 

#‎SFGiants‬ feeling sorry for ‪#‎Dodgers‬ with ‪#‎Kershaw‬ potentially needing back surgery. Maybe they can ship ‪#‎Cain‬ to ‪#‎LA‬ as a replacement.

#‎SFGiants‬ have had the lead in exactly one inning since the All-Star break.

The Big 12 is thinking of expanding in football, from 10 teams to 12. Arithmetic, what a concept.

 

Paul Ryan, at a meeting of the Texas GOP, talked about the football rivalries like A&M and Texas, “When one of the teams advances to a big bowl game or a national championship, don’t you root for the Aggies if you are a Longhorn?”
The speaker got booed. Good thing Ryan didn’t try that in the Florida delegation with the Gators and Seminoles. He might still be in intensive care.

 

Paul Ryan also talked about Ohio State and Michigan rooting for each other in bowl games because they were in the same conference. Does the man realize that Ohio is in an open-carry state?

 

Well, not sure what @realDonaldTrump might plagiarize on Thursday, but just guessing it won’t be Reagan’s “tear down that wall.” ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

Reports are that John ‪#‎Kasich‬ turned down an offer to be “most powerful VP in history.” So was @HillaryClinton reaching across the aisle?

So wait, if ‪#‎MeredithMcIver‬ wrote speech what about lie Melania told about writing it herself. ‪#‎IOYIYR‬ ‪#‎IOKIYT‬ (It’s OK if you’re Republican, or Trump.)

 

‪#‎MeredithMcIver‬ to take blame. Will Trump fire her? Not for plagiarizing but for saying for saying Melania always admired ‪#‎MichelleObama‬

Donald Trump “Good news is Melania’s speech got more publicity than any in the history of politics especially if you believe that all press is good press!”
So how is the Donald going to start his speech Thursday? “Four score and seven years ago, all we had to fear was fear itself, but I have a HUGE dream that it’s time for Americans to ask what they can do for their country….”

 

After watching ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ a lot of people are thinking by comparison that ‪#‎OscarsNotSoWhite‬

So, okay, I think I’ve got this straight: The GOP wants Loretta Lynch to be disqualified as U.S. Attorney General for prejudice after her meeting with Bill Clinton. But it’s okay for Chris Christie to have the role after saying Hillary should be locked up. ‪#‎SMH‬

 

N.H. GOP state rep and Trump advisor Al Baldasaro said Hillary Clinton “should be put in the firing line and shot for treason.” Uh, speaking of treason, doesn’t threatening a potential President fall into that category?

 

So @realDonaldTrump says ‪#‎TedCruz‬ didn’t “honor his pledge” And who should be more expert on not honoring pledges than man married 3 times.

Not that I quote Caitlyn Jenner almost ever, but on the bathroom issue, she noted that former Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, former Mississippi Rep. Jon Hinson & former Florida state Rep. Bob Allen had all been arrested for “lewd behavior” in men’s restrooms,
“Maybe what we should do is ban Republican representatives at a state level from being in the men’s room.

A Florida girl not chosen to be a cheerleader has threatened to sue if she isn’t named to the high school team. ‪#‎ifonlyshewerearmed‬

 

Apparently many Twitter users were incensed that Megyn Kelly was wearing a spaghetti strap form-fitting top today to cover the RNC for Fox. Probably all Republicans. Democratic women would support Megyn’s right to dress as she pleases, and men would think the incident deserves a longer investigation.

How often does @HillaryClinton applaud ‪#‎TedCruz‬? ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

Did ‪#‎Trump‬ give ‪#‎TedCruz‬ an ‪#‎RNC‬ speaking slot because Cruz’s dad still might know some of those assassins? ‪#‎Fearfactor‬ ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

‎MikePence‬, “I’m a Christian, a conservative and a Republican, in that order.” Just like it says in the U.S. Constitution…. ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ ‪#‎WTF‬?

Running jokes?

July 19, 2016

Many in the California delegation at ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ have gotten norovirus. Talk about a sh*tty convention.

 

With many in California delegation felled by norovirus at ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ good thing they have TP.

 

If norovirus spreads throughout ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ guessing delegates will decide which gender sign is on NEAREST bathroom will not be a priority.

Many in GOP loved ‪#‎MelaniaTrump‬‘s ‪#‎RNC‬ speech. African-Americans just sigh “Another white woman getting credit for a black woman’s work”

Trump campaign on ‪#‎MalaniaTrump‬ ‪#‎speechgate‬ “When Hillary Clinton is threatened by a female, the first thing she does is try to destroy the person.” So “Blame Hillary.”
Congrats to all those who had “Tuesday morning in the pool.

Paul Manafort, Trump’s new campaign manager “These were common words and values. To think that she would be cribbing Michelle Obama’s words is crazy.”
Uh, does Manafort think the American public is crazy?

Question of the convention for Thursday night now, WWDP – “Who Will Donald plagiarize?” ‪#‎MakeAmericaDuplicateAgain‬.

Trump seems obsessed with the idea of ‪#‎CrookedHillary‬..  Maybe Freud was right about projection. ‪#‎CrookedDonald‬ ‪#‎CrookedMelania‬?

So why did ‪#‎KimberlinBrown‬ speak tonight? Was she turned down by ‪#‎DWTS‬? ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

The founder of “American Muslims for Trump” delivered tonight’s ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ benediction. Founder and only member?

Traffic over the Hudson is a “nightmare” after a construction crane on the Tappan Zee Bridge collapsed this morning. Hoping this wasn’t caused by a Chris Christie jumping up and down tantrum over not being named Trump’s running mate.

Chris Christie defending Melania Trump’s speech, said that 93%  of it was original.  So open note to students. Try this excuse next time you’re about to be tossed out of a class or flunked for plagiarism. I’m sure the teacher or professor will understand. ‪#‎SMH‬

That’s it, next year the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ need to cancel ‪#‎AllStar‬ break for all players.  Simulated games every day to keep fresh.

 

Who’d a thunk seven years ago that would be a lot more relevant on the than ?

Clayton Kershaw apparently felt discomfort in his back after simulated start this weekend, and his return is uncertain. SFGiants fans wish him the best, maybe a relaxing vacation on a beach until sometime in November.

This spring in talking before a small group of advisors, George W. Bush allegedly worried that he “would be the last Republican president.”
And somewhere Dick Cheney just giggled.

 

The NY Daily News is reporting that Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly and others are considering walking out if Roger Ailes leaves the network. Promise?

What was real point of ‪#‎Trump‬‘s scripted ‪#‎RNC‬ convention tonight, that he chose ex-wives who at least did good job of raising his children?

Donald Trump’s campaign will not fire anyone over ‪#‎Melaniasspeech‬. Translation, maybe Donald wrote it for her. ‪#‎speechgate‬

RIP Garry Marshall, 81, who created “Happy Days”” and directed “Pretty Woman.” Let’s hope it wasn’t the reviews from “Mother’s Day ” that killed him.

Trump goes after Bill over women when the Donald has had multiple affairs and marriages, he goes after Hillary for being crooked when he has had many of his own shady deals, and now it turns out after going after Biden for plagiarism, his wife Melania helps herself to Michelle’s speech.
Since Trump also seems obsessed with attacking Elizabeth Warren maybe time to check his family’s past resumes for requests for affirmation action?

So here’s what I don’t get. Nothing against Melania who presumably didn’t figure on a presidential campaign in her “for better or worse” vows. Still how easy to come up with a semi-apology, saying either that she must have read Michelle’s speech or that was part of her speech where she had help, whatever. …
And then Melania could have added something gracious like “We have very different ideas about how this country should be run, but we both want the best for our children and for our country’s future.” .But would that have been too reasonable for today’s GOP?

It must be Hillary’s fault

July 18, 2016

Now she’s rubbed off on the latest Mrs. Trump.   #plagiarism #crookedmelania?

To be fair someone who’s repeated same marriage vows 3 times probably doesn’t have a real problem with plagiarism. ‪#‎Melania‬ ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

 

 

So which is better, admitting she lied about writing the speech, or admitting she plagiarized? ‪#‎CrookedMelania‬ ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬

Before the plagiarism allegation popped up, that moment when a Presidential candidate’s third wife talks about how loyal he is. ‪#‎whythereisnosatire‬ ‪#‎MelaniaTrump‬ ‪#‎RNC2016‬

#‎RNCinCLE‬ is so backwards we could be watching in black and white. Except that there is almost no black and too much white.

So far ‪#‎Trump‬‘s ‪#‎RNCinCLE‬ is proving you can’t have a circus without elephants.

 

Leborn James today officially told the Cavs that he is returning to Cleveland. But not presumably this week during the convention.

#‎Melania‬ Trump, “Donald gets things done.” She should know; including the divorces from his first two wives.

This Republican convention makes you long for the comparative sanity of ‪#‎TheBachelorette‬

Another reason to dislike Trump in Northern California. By his VP choices he has sullied the name of the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ beloved right fielder. ‪#‎Pence‬

The GOP managed to stop an attempted voice vote today over convention rules. The anti-Trump people clearly erred, they should have tied their protest to defunding Obamacare.

Trump on Obama’s response to the latest police shootings: “sometimes the words are OK, but you just look at the body language, there’s something going on. Look, there’s something going on, and the words are not often OK, by the way.”
Again, this is the Donald trying to be in Presidential mode.

Although Trump does seem a bit obsessed with Obama’s body language. Maybe he’s getting old. Used to be the Donald only cared about body language in a swimsuit competition.

Paul Ryan is being mocked for a large selfie with GOP interns that was whiter than a picture of polar bears in winter. Forget the open carry of guns, clearly some people cannot be trusted with selfie sticks.

Christopher Correa, the former Cardinals scouting director, was sentenced to 46 months in prison Monday for hacking the Houston Astros’ player personnel database and email system. Correa was the only person charged in the case.
St. Louis chairman Bill DeWitt Jr, had said it was “roguish behavior” by a handful of individuals.
Didn’t they say the same thing at first about Watergate?

(and as a number of friends pointed out, 46 months is longer than some people get for rape and DUI murders in this country.  #priorities)

In Chicopee, Massachusetts, a 15 year old boy was killed after, while looking for a friend in the afternoon, he knocked on the side door of the wrong house, and the homeowner shot him. ‪#‎ifonlytheboyhadbeenarmed‬

(and for the record, both the boy and the homeowner were white.)

TC brings up the next worry facing Americans – and Canadians-  let’s hope Melania does not steal our jokes.

Missed calls?

July 18, 2016

 

MLB’s Joe Torre sent a memo to managers and GMs telling them to stop arguing balls and strikes “This highly inappropriate conduct is detrimental to the game and must stop immediately.”
Uh, Joe, what about the “highly inappropriate conduct” of so many missed calls?

Alphonse Taylor, Alabama’s starting right guard and a pre-season All-SEC pick was arrested for alleged DUI Sunday am. Well, no doubt Nick Saban will suspend him for at least a quarter of the season-opener, which is against…. USC.
Never mind, I am sure Saban will take care of matters internally.

Two Florida teens were playing “Pokemon Go” in a car outside a house at 130am when the homeowner, hearing a noise, fired several shots at them. The kids were uninjured but found several bullet holes in the car in the morning. So what’s next for players, Pokeguns? ‪#‎ifonlytheywerearmed‬

So when Scotland leaves after Brexit will it no longer be the British Open? ‪#‎TheOpen‬

Although, seriously on a lighter note has there ever been a more riveting sports competition between two men over 40?  #Hoorayforoldfarts

 

More sad news this morning, this time out of ‪#‎BatonRouge‬ . Seriously this ‪#‎goodguywithagun‬ idea is not working in the US.

Trump today – “How many law enforcement and people have to die because of a lack of leadership in our country? We demand law and order.”
So if the Donald gets elected he’s just going to demand people stop shooting each other? If only there wasn’t that pesky 2nd amendment.

The president of the Cleveland Police Patrolmen’s Association wants Gov. Kasich to temporarily suspend “open carry” for the sake of security during the RNC convention.
So where is Trump’s reply telling the police how much safer they will be with all those “good guys with guns?”

Actor Antonio Sabàto Jr.will apparently now speak at the ‪#‎RNCConvention‬ for Trump. Even ‪#‎DWTS‬ is going, “who?”

 

So Mike Pence in a joint “60 Minutes” appearance with Donald Trump spent much of his time trying to explain the Donald’s positions in a more measured way. So will Pence be known as “The Trump Whisperer?”

 

 

 


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