Sweet home Alabama

Posted December 14, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: Uncategorized

Steve Kerr had “Sweet Home Alabama” playing today during #Warriorspractice. Just guessing if they win again it will be 2nd year Golden State won’t get White House invite.

Bad news for Clemson Tigers. Not that it really matters, but in all Red State CFB Playoff, all of a sudden, USA has a whole lot of new fans.

Another Hannukah miracle. Who ever thought that Steve Kerr, Gregg Popovich and Charles Barkley would all be in agreement on anything? #DougJones

Now that we have #DougJones in the Senate, can we move on to getting the #SFGiants a power-hitter? @SFGiants

Wednesday it was Tavis Smiley. So the Christmas Advent Sexual Harassment calendar hasn’t missed a day yet.

So now that #RoyMoore has lost will they fire their “Jew attorney?”

63-yr-old Alabama white man quoted Tuesday “I just love the unborn far too much to ever vote for a national Democrat.”
Fortunately more of the state decided they love the “born.”

Colorado GOP Sen. Cory Gardner “I hope Senator-elect Doug Jones will do the right thing and truly represent Alabama by choosing to vote with the Senate Republican majority.”
Uh, Sen. Gardner, Colorado went for Hillary. When are you going to do the right thing and truly represent Colorado by voting with Democrats?

US Deputy AG Rod Rosenstein told Judiciary Committee he sees “no good cause” to fire Robert Mueller. How long until Trump tries to fire Rosenstein?

Let’s look at this another way. Anyone doubt if Al Franken were being replaced by a GOP senator, McConnell would have him sworn in by the weekend?

Roy Moore really disappointed today. Not only did he lose Senate election, but apparently all Alabama jobs for mall Santas have been filled.

For all of us who cheered #HiddenFigures#BlackWomen deserve another ovation after Alabama.

Roy Moore still thinks he can get a recount in Alabama. Well, what do you expect from a man who convinced himself that 14 was 18.

 

Sad for Dan Johnson’s family. The Kentucky state legislator, accused of molesting a teenager at his church where he was a pastor, apparently shot himself.  But have to wonder how many girls and women have committed suicide over the years after being molested.

 

Just to start a non-political controversy for a change, who do my friends and readers think should be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame who isn’t already in?
I’m thinking “The Carpenters.” Don’t laugh. Plenty of soft-rock and pop acts in there. Karen had one of the best voices ever, and they were very successful standing out from the crowd.

Advertisements

Roll Tide.

Posted December 13, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: Uncategorized

Tags: , , ,

As promised, two words I thought I’d never say. Roll Tide!!! #ThankyouAlabama

 

So has Alabama suddenly become America’s team?

#PopovichBarkley2020?

Forget small quantity of oil lasting 8 days. #DougJones turning Alabama blue is a true Hanukkah miracle.

Jose Canseco – “These women complaining against sexual misconduct are just racist against ugly men.” Guess that home run ball off his head hit him harder than we thought.

Reportedly Astros saw that Yu Darvish was tipping his pitches in World Series. Question of the day – why couldn’t the Dodgers see it?

Four best words of the morning for San Antonio fans “Kawhi is back tonight.”

But Leonard only played 16 minutes, and then Spurs lost to Mavericks.  Wonder if Pop told him “we did better without you.”

Nick Saban may have gotten more write-in votes than the difference between #DougJones & #RoyMoore#RollTide

Doug Jones margin of victory is less than Alabama write-in total. How often does a Democrat say “Thank you @SenShelby”

Bannon basically attacked Ivanka w/ his “special place in hell for Republicans” line. And crickets from @POTUS. What about a special place in hell for fathers who don’t support their daughters? @realDonaldTrump

Tweet of the day from Meghan McCain “Suck it, Bannon.”

Wonder if Roy Moore’s “Jew” lawyer just quit.

Roy Moore still not conceding – “God is in control.” Yeah, and clearly she was pissed.

Wonder if Roy Moore only rides a horse because he hears it attracts teenage girls.

Moore said this morning that Alabama voters should “vote their conscience.”   Wonder if he wishes he could take that back.

 

Fox headline “Roy Moore, battered by the media and the establishment, loses in huge Alabama upset.”
How about “Roy Moore, battered by his own past actions and statements, loses in a state where a monkey in a Santa Suit could have won with an ‘R’ by his name.”

Trump is saying he never met some of the women who have accused him of sexual assault, despite there being pictures of him with them. So what @POTUS is really telling us is that he has dementia?

Trump saying again he wants to end ‘chain migration,” since Port Authority wannabe bomber got in because of one of his relatives.
But hey, isn’t “chain migration” how US got stuck with Ivanka, Jared, Don Jr, & Eric in influential positions?

Anyone who believes there are “many fine people” on both sides should read some of comments on SF Mayor Ed Lee’s death on FoxNews website. But be prepared to throw up.

Mistakes were made.

Posted December 11, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: football jokes, political jokes, Trump jokes, Uncategorized

Tags: , , , , ,

Giancarlo Stanton sounds positively giddy about leaving #Marlins for #Yankees. And of course NY fans & media will be so supportive if he has anything less than an MVP year.

 

NFL warned teams today it will begin “significant discipline” to anyone engaging in offensive conduct or contact against game officials.”
What about discipline for offensive officiating?

On a non-political note, three of the nicest words for Tuesday are “Kawhi Leonard ‘probable.”” #GoSpursGo @Spurs

According to Hank Schulman Stanton has been spending “Octobers in Europe unable to really watch the playoffs because it just kills him.”
Save this post if Yankees miss 2018 Postseason

Derek Jeter, on Stanton trade “No, there isn’t anything I would do differently.” Has someone checked former Yankees’ captain for concussions?

 

Maybe they don’t have Louis Vuitton stores in Lithuania?

Now it’s #CarsonWentz who is out for the season. With three weeks to go how many stars will be left for the @NFL playoffs?

Oops. Neither Bangladesh nor Brooklyn were on Trump’s travel ban list.#PortAuthority

#PortAuthority suspect said he made his bomb at work. And some people feel guilty about wasting employer time by with games or online shopping.

Dept of Education under Betsy Devos has stopped cancelling student loan debt for those defrauded by failed for-profit schools. Because how could they acknowledge it might have been a major mistake to attend Trump University?

Just imagine if when @BarackObama went to Hawaii for vacation he stayed at resort owned by his family & made a profit off trip. GOP heads would have exploded.

If you’re really “pro-life” it seems like a no-brainer to vote for man who successfully prosecuted murderers of four little girls. @GDouglasJones

 

December bringing different man or men every day accused of sexual harassment. This is becoming like a very twisted advent calendar.

It”s only Monday & this week #RyanLizza#MarioBatali…. Beginning to think it’s a bad idea to put men in positions of power.

Waiting for @realDonaldTrump to respond that he doesn’t get what all #KaylaMoore fuss is about “I have a Jew son-in-law.”

 

Just wondering, how many people have attorneys (plural) and KNOW what religion they all are? #KaylaMoore #NoMoore

Considering #KaylaMoore‘s “Jew” lawyer comment & his friend talking about child brothels, I understand why #RoyMoore tried to lie low weekend before election.

Crickets on #PortAuthority from @realDonaldTrump If alleged wannabe terrorist had been from country on his travel ban he’d have tweeted within 30 seconds.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders says on Trump sexual assault allegations “American people knew this & voted for him,”   So WTF was Donald Trump doing going after Bill Clinton 20+ years later after his election?

Trump attacks @NYTimes for saying he watches 4-8 hours of TV a day. Maybe he means he really watches 8-12 hours….

Home stretch

Posted December 10, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: Uncategorized

It takes a lot of work for a perfect season. With their 4th quarter performance today it appears as if the Browns are up to the task.

Cleats, heck.  How many on the Bills & Colts in today’s Buffalo blizzard considered switching to ice skates?

Rex Ryan dissed Geno Smith, Smith called his former coach a “coward,” today Ryan compared Geno to a marshmallow. These two are more entertaining than watching Giants.

Baker Mayfield won the Heisman easily with great stats. But with a preseason arrest and other issues  he can thank Cam Newton, Johnny Manziel and Jameis Winston for getting committee to drop “integrity” from their mission statement.

Is there an award for the most runner-up finishes for the Heisman?  (Stanford has five since 2009.)

 

Alabama has a chance to get even many of us on West Coast to root for #CrimsonTide in CFB Playoffs this year.    Just elect #DougJones

We like to think national conversation about sexual assault has changed. But Ben Rothlisberger still remains popular in Pittsburgh.

No one in Alabama can find Roy Moore. Have they looked inside mall Santa suits?

Just imagine if that reporter had tweeted a picture making @realDonaldTrump’s hands look too small?

Whatever the Trump crowd size was at Pensacola rally, it was certainly a very WHITE Christmas event.

If lying about crowd size is cause for losing your job when is Trump resigning?

“We call it a tipping point, I think, so many accusations, so many cuts, so many drip, drip, drip — when it got to the 14-year-old’s story, that was enough for me. I said I can’t vote for Roy Moore.”
Another liberal for Doug Jones. Nope, Alabama GOP Senator Richard Shelby.

Alabama Sen Richard Shelby said he didn’t vote #RoyMoore but wrote in a “distinguished Republican name. And I think a lot of people could do that.’
Works for me. Or may I suggest Alabama voters write in Nick Saban?

Cory Booker, talking about Al Franken “My question is, why isn’t Donald Trump doing same thing — who has more serious allegations against him, w/ more women who have come forward.”
Too soon to start pool when Trump will tweet with stupid nickname for @CoryBooker?

 

 

Can we have a moment to remind Alabama voters that not only is @GDouglasJones a former prosecutor, he is a hunter who owns guns?

Still the captain?

Posted December 9, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: Uncategorized

Tags: , , , , ,

If Yankees win 2018 World Series will they vote Jeter a playoff share?

 

So too soon to investigate former Yankee Derek Jeter for possible collusion?#Stanton

Maybe it’s time to rename them the Flori-duh Marlins.

If you already rooted against @Yankees then it’s not sour grapes if you start rooting against Stanton right? @SFGiants

Ohtani claimed he wanted a small market team. So will LA revert to calling themselves the Anaheim Angels?

United and Delta now doing basic economy fares on transatlantic flights. Because international flights weren’t fun enough without bargain-hunting families with children getting assigned to all middle seats and then trying to bug other people on the plane to switch with them.

 

As a candidate @realDonaldTrump mocked a disabled reporter. Last night he mocked a sexual assault victim. Make America Gross Again? #MAGA

At Trump’s first White House Hanukkah Party, did he tell them Christmas is back, bigger and better than ever?

At least one of the women who came forward about Roy Moore has been receiving death threats. And some still wonder why women don’t speak out.

 

We’ve gone from Senate candidate who dated children to congressman who wanted staffers to have his children. Can see why GOP is family values party.

Trump attacks @CNN after date error for being Fake News. But crickets on @FoxNews having to rescind the Roy Moore yearbook forgery story.

After Friday’s rally and ‘Lock her up” chants in Pensacola maybe the rest of Florida wants to secede from the Panhandle?

Fox News ranted about about acquittal in Kate Steinle case. Where’s their outrage on what seems much more egregious Daniel Shaver case?

What a world, many mass shootings & GOP still supports all gun owners. But idea that one #MeToo allegation might be false to them discredits all women.

More snow in Atlanta. Maybe someone shouldn’t have said hell would freeze over before the GOP endorsed a pro-slavery child molester for Senate.

GOP absolutely will fight for female baby’s right to be born so she can grow up & then be mocked & derided when she complains about sexual assault. #Prolifemyass

Coming soon, Dodger Doritos?

Posted December 8, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: Uncategorized

LA City Council voted to legalize marijuana sales starting in 2018. And we thought a lot of fans were late to Dodgers games until now…. #dudewheresmyticket

 

LaVar Ball now wants both his sons to play overseas. Thinking Europe response “Uh, no, we have Louis Vuitton stores too.”

Former Team USA gymnastic doctor Larry Nassar sentenced to 60 years in prison. Can they put him in general population?

So maybe besides all the other bets on Thursday Night Football there should be an over-under on injuries?

Cleveland Browns fired Sashi Brown, executive VP in charge of their personnel dept. #Browns fans shocked – team HAS a personnel dept?

Are millennials into bitcoin because they missed out on beanie babies?

Or is  “bitcoin” millennial for “tulip bulbs?”

 

United Airlines has a waiver for winter weather. On December 7. In Atlanta, Georgia. But no, we don’t have climate change.

So while we work up to @realDonaldTrump & @MooreSenate can GOP start by calling for Blake Farenthold to resign?

Pantene says the color of the year for 2018 will be “Ultra violet.” Waiting for tweet from Trump complaining that it’s not orange. #fakecolor

 

So Trump is going to have a physical next year. Will that include a visit to his dentist? #DentureDonald

White House @PressSec said @realDonaldTrump will undergo a physical next year & results will be made public. Right after he releases his tax returns?

Arizona GOP Rep. Trent Franks said he is resigning over asking female staffers about becoming a surrogate for his child. Why do I guess that wasn’t phrase he used? Cue Paul Anka #Havingmybaby

GOP claims to be the party of personal responsibility. Until they get elected.#Franken #Conyers #Moore #Trump

Donald Trump Jr tweeted an attack on Al Franken this morning. Donny claiming moral high ground is like Hillary Clinton claiming to be expert on email servers.

Damn, now #NewMexico. Time to reset the mass shooting clock to zero again. And for NRA to claim all students should be armed

Roll tide?

Posted December 7, 2017 by left coast sports babe
Categories: football jokes, political jokes, Trump jokes, Uncategorized

Tags: , , , , ,

Open note to the good people of Alabama. Hard for me to say this, but vote in Doug Jones & I will actually root for Nick Saban & Crimson Tide. Once anyway. #Priorities

Rafael Palmeiro, 53, says he is contemplating a return to MLB. Uh oh, nobody tell Jamie Moyer.

Roger Goodell has signed a $200 million contract to remain NFL commissioner. Yeah, that man really needs a tax cut.

Cowboys to debut new uniforms this weekend. Unfortunately for Dallas fans they will still have same old Cowboys in them.

Former gymnasts & their parents pushing for maximum sentence for ex-Team USA doctor Larry Nassar. And indeed it’s a risk. If he ever gets out of prison he could run for office as a Republican.

If San Antonio Spurs could just add one good player, they could be a great team this year. @kawhileonard @Spurs

Pfizer is introducing a generic Viagra for “only” about $32 a pill. That’s still a stiff price.

GOP House just approved bill to allow gun owners to carry concealed weapons across state lines. But we’re still out of luck with marijuana gummies.

So for safety reasons Nikki Haley indicates we might not send US athletes to #WinterOlympics2018 in Korea. Even more encouragement for Kim Jong Un to try his missiles to US mainland?

Maybe Russia and the US can have their own games, where all the medals go to Putin and Trump.

Think we could get bipartisan agreement on a special place in hell for those who run red lights at left turn and get stuck in intersection so people going straight can’t go on green.

Now it appears #RoyMoore was dating his wife while she was still married. Wonder how “Christian” bakers feel now about THAT wedding cake?

 

A Delta flight from JFK to Seattle, which is over 6 hours, had all toilets malfunction and had to make a bathroom break stop for passengers in Billings. At Spirit Airlines they’d have probably passed around paper cups for $5.

San Francisco central subway reportedly is falling further behind schedule. Construction started in 2011, supposed to open in 2018, city says 2019, and main contractor now estimates 2021.
If we’re doing a pool, dibs on 2025.
If Senator Franken steps down tomorrow to do the “right thing” can he also call on GOP colleagues and President to do the same?
 –

While we move forward against sexual predators in politics, remember, past allegations matter. But can we focus on those currently in office? JFK & Ted are dead, Bill & H.W aren’t running again….

WH said Trump slurred words at end of speech today because he had “a dry throat.” Right. And Hillary wasn’t healthy enough to be President. #sarcasm

Trevor Noah on The Daily Show reminds us Donald Trump is very sensitive about his appearance & so we should absolutely not tweet or post things about  #DentureDonald

 

One of worst things about all sexual harassment stories coming out is that no matter who you are, someone you’ve admired will be or has been caught. Beginning to think men have real self-control issues.

Democrats calling for resignation of one of their most popular Senators. GOP putting more $$$ into campaign of man who wasn’t fit to serve BEFORE sexual allegations. Still think there’s no difference between parties?