Posted tagged ‘NFL blackout jokes’

Only one more shopping day

December 20, 2013

Until the first NCAA football FBS bowl game of the year.


And if you know the name of the game, and who’s playing, and you’re not an alum of either team…. you probably have two much time on your hands.

The NFL said today it “strongly opposes” the FCC trying to end their 40-year sports blackout rule. Right. Because the average team only made $44 million in operating profit last year. (Source – Forbes) The owners have to feed their families.


Kobe Bryant, who just returned from a torn Achilles, has fractured his knee and will miss at least six weeks. So wonder how much Jack Nicholson is offering for courtside seats to the Clippers?

Olympic figure skating champion Brian Boitano came out as gay today. “I’m shocked” said absolutely nobody.

Whatever you think of President Obama, sending Russia a U.S delegation w/  does perhaps rank as the most elegant one, or rather three-finger salute of his presidency.

Pope Francis now has stated that he supports breastfeeding and he is okay with women doing it in public. Can we start a pool on when Rush Limbaugh’s head will explode?

Airbus, which would like airlines who buy their planes to put fewer seats in them, did a recent study of passengers. 54% said “an increase of comfort in economy class was critical or absolutely critical.” Perhaps those 54% should have a more reasonable dream – like winning the lottery.


As a British phone hacking scandal broadens, now it’s been revealed that Prince William referred to Kate as “babykins.” The Palace is not amused, but hey, on the other hand, an heir to the throne saying sweet nothings to his own wife…..



John Boehner is calling out “conservative groups”, Peter King said Rand Paul owes “that patriot,” NID Director James Clapper, an apology for saying he should resign for “lying” to a Senate committee about govt surveillance, and Glenn Beck called Chris Christie a “fat nightmare.”   Remember when not belonging to any organized party meant being a Democrat?

Somewhere Will Rogers is smiling.

So the government apparently has had access to some of our phone calls. On the other hand, in the private sector, Target apparently allowed access to 40 million Americans’ credit cards.

Fortunately there appear to be no fatalities after the roof collapsed at London’s Apollo Theatre tonight during a performance of “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. although as many as 80 people may have been injured. But think of all the men who reluctantly went along with their wives who had said “Honey, just come with me to one show, how much could it hurt?”

“Duck Dynasty” is on hiatus, after their star was suspended for anti-gay comments. So what are viewers to do who find “Honey Boo-Boo” too intellectual?

Well of course she did. Sarah Palin has defended Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson: “Free speech is an endangered species. Those ‘intolerants’ hatin’ and taking on the Duck Dynasty patriarch for voicing his personal opinion are taking on all of us.” Right. Free speech is important… unless it’s from anyone taking on Sarah herself.

So this is what Phil Robertson actually said when asked what is sinful. “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men.” Uh, START with homosexual behavior? Why didn’t he start with “sleeping around?” Except that that would alienate too many of his fellow conservatives, including the junior senator from his home state of Louisiana.