Posted tagged ‘NCAA jokes’
February 25, 2018
If Donald Trump had played college football we’d all be nodding our heads in agreement on a diagnosis of CTE.
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With the increasingly depleted Spurs somehow still in third place in the West, Gregg Popovich should be coach of year. Period. #smokeandmirrors
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Shaquille O’Neal’s son, Shareef, just announced he is decommitting from Arizona. Because he just found out the program is dirty, or because they didn’t offer HIM $100,000?
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Curt Schilling retweeted a conspiracy theory saying 17 yr-old Parkland survivor David Hogg is a paid crisis actor. Only charitable interpretation of this is that baseball players also can get too many concussions.
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Teresa Stadlober, an Austrian cross-country skier, lost a silver medal when she took a wrong turn during a 30km race. Wait, I thought it was men that wouldn’t ask for directions.
LeBron James, complaining about not getting foul calls in loss to Spurs – “We’re at a point now where we protect the shooter more than the driver.”
Maybe he should stick to politics?
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Canadian ski crosser David Duncan, along with his trainer and wife were arrested for alleged DUI in a stolen vehicle in South Korea. Know Canada is doing well with medals but maybe trying too hard to prove they are equal of American athletes.
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Meanwhile, USA has won gold in #Curling Let’s hope this isn’t a sign of the apocalypse.
Pistons coach Stan Van Gundy called NCAA “one of the worst organizations” in sports. Why stop at “in sports?”
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Trump on his proposed military parade “We’ll see if we can do it at a reasonable cost. If we can’t, we won’t do it.”
What, he didn’t say Mexico would pay for it?
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United Airlines and Delta have now cut off discounts for #NRA. How bad is it when you have a worse reputation in the US than airlines?
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Donald Trump mocked John McCain yesterday. So let’s see, now it’s people with terminal cancer. How long until he goes directly after a Parkland survivor?
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Imagine GOP reaction if a President @HillaryClinton sent Chelsea over to South Korea to “shore up diplomatic relations?”
Asked in Korea if her father’s idea of arming teachers would work to protect students Ivanka Trump responded “To be honest, I don’t know.”
Six words Donald has never spoken.
Frustrating as a Democrat that we call out extremist Republicans like #CPACbut then often put in our own litmus tests that punish moderates. #DianneFeinstein
But let’s be real about Feinstein. Democrats not endorsing her means simply that she didn’t get a majority of 2700 activists at state party convention. The Democratic convention isn’t CPAC, but it’s also not a sampling of mainstream Democrats.
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Here’s what I really don’t get about political litmus tests. None of us agree with our spouses, partners, or even friends on all issues. So why do some of us demand our politicians agree with us on everything? #HowToLoseElections
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, Olympics jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
November 17, 2017
House tax bill would not allow fans who make mandatory “donations” to universities for the right to buy expensive college football or basketball tickets to deduct those donations as charity.
Just guessing they’re not hyping this part of the bill in red states.
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No Kawhi Leonard, no Tony Parker, 23 point deficit to OKC, and Spurs win. Just possible Popovich is a very good coach.
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Now Jameis Winston accused of groping a female Uber driver. Buccaneers wishing he had stuck to grabbing crab legs?
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Gymnast do take hard falls. Has anyone checked #GabbyDouglas for concussions?
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Battle between Jerry Jones and Roger Goodell may turn out to be more riveting than 90% of NFL games this season.
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Sad when it’s come to seeing #JesseJackson trending & you’re almost relieved it’s “only” Parkinson’s disease – not him dying or being accused of sexual assault.
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So after Trump pardons Thanksgiving turkey will he then ship it to Mar-a-Lago to be secretly cooked & sold to guests at $100 a plate?
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Saying Mike Pence’s policy of never being alone with another woman makes sense is like saying people should never go to museums w/ famous works of art because it’s too hard to look and not touch.
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Trump tweet “Put big game trophy decision on hold until such time as I review all conservation facts. Under study for years. Will update soon with Secretary Zinke. Thank you!”
Who knew that some in the party that doesn’t give a damn about poor children and immigrants have a soft spot for elephants?
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Trump “unexpectedly” released list of 5 conservatives he might appoint to Supreme Court. Bribe for when more sexual assault accusations come out?
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Kayla Moore says President owes them thank you for taking “focus off Russia.” Except Trump might not be happy – Moore story also takes focus off Trump.
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Guess no one told @realDonaldTrump, that a- it’s “FrankenSTEIN,” and b- Frankenstein was the doctor. Monster he created had no name.
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Amazing GOP contortions to convince themselves that any woman who accuses a Republican is an angry liar & anyone who accuses a Dem a wronged saint.
Sarah Huckabee Sanders – “Difference between Franken and Trump is that Franken has admitted wrongdoing.” Right, adults do that.
So with Sarah Huckabee Sanders logic, any man who denies sexual harassment or abuse is innocent. I missed her exoneration of Bill Clinton.
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Trump says Al Franken “really bad.” Because he groped a woman’s breast instead of grabbing her by the pussy?
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That moment when you think a zygote is worthy of protection but a teenage girl is not. #KaylaMoore #RoyMoore
Categories: football jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: college football jokes, Janice Hough, kayla moore jokes, moore jokes, NCAA jokes, Trump jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
November 14, 2017
Arkansas has suspended freshman QB Cole Kelley, 20, after a DWI arrest, for at least one game. Coach Bielema: “Starting games here is a very big deal. Social media and everything else around, he’s going to be held to a higher standard. … ”
A DWI arrest at 20? Higher standard than what?
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UCLA players accused of shoplifting are on flights home. That’ll teach them – shoplift designer sunglasses & you could be forced to spent a week away from classes at a deluxe hotel.
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On a lighter note, USA Today projections for 2017-18 Bowl Games. Holiday Bowl Dec 28 – Stanford vs Michigan. #HolyHarbaugh
France is apparently considering legalizing sex with 13 yr-olds. In related news #RoyMoore is considering retirement to Paris.
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Shooter today in Rancho Tehama another angry white guy. Standby for more GOP thoughts & prayers,” & talk about mental illness while cutting funding for mental health.
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Everyone who insists #RoyMoore‘s behavior was normal for Alabama at the time, forgets that people thought he was creepy AT THE TIME.
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Now Paul Ryan is calling on Roy Moore to step aside. Unless he gets elected in which case he’ll want Moore to resign after voting for tax cuts.
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McConnell floating idea of Sessions as write-in candidate for Alabama Senate. Though apparently AG has same possible Alzheimer’s memory problems as Moore. #ICantRecall
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Paul Ryan “House will adopt a policy of mandatory anti-harassment & anti-discrimination training for all Members & staff. ” What about Oval Office?
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Trump got off a plane tonight from the Philippines and promptly tweeted “May God be with the people of Sutherland Springs, Texas. The FBI and Law Enforcement has arrived.”
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Question of night, will @realDonaldTrump delete tweet referencing 9-day-old mass shooting instead of today’s, or double down on it?
#SutherlandSprings #RanchoTehama
Categories: football jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, roy moore jokes, sessions jokes, Trump jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
September 26, 2017
FBI says sting found multiple bribes, payouts involving Arizona, Auburn, Oklahoma State & USC. There’s corruption in NCAA basketball, I’m shocked.
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Meanwhile, at Louisville, men’s basketball coach Rick Pitino expressed “complete shock” that his university is also involved in the investigation.
Pitino is shocked? He’s like the guy overseeing gambling in Casablanca.
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Auburn & USC are two of schools snared in NCAA men’s basketball sting. Tigers & Trojans fans are just glad it wasn’t their football teams.
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Ah for the days when #SFGiants really and truly sucking in 2017 would have been one of things folks in Bay Area were most upset about.
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If we got rid of national anthem before sporting events could eliminate controversy AND shorten game times. #winwin
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Peyton Manning reportedly a “possible” 2018 candidate for U.S. Senate. Will his campaign be sponsored by Budweiser and Papa John’s?
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Repeal of Obamacare will not come to a vote. So officially dead, again. For now. Forget Trumpcare we should call this GOP mess Zombiecare
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AG Sessions gave a talk on free speech at Georgetown. Protesters were banned from the speech. #WhyThereIsNoSatire
Reportedly Khloe Kardashian is pregnant with Cavs’ Tristan Thompson’s baby. Odds just went up for Warriors to be disinvited again as champions in 2019 by White House.
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So Twitter is going to 280 characters? Waiting for the Trump tweet taking credit.
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Trump couldn’t get Hurricane Relief to Puerto Rico as “it’s an island.” Somehow 1 of those athletes he trashes, Tim Duncan made it to USVI.
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Trump on Puerto Rico- “It’s very tough because it’s an island.” Hawaiians praying they never need federal help while he’s in office. #WTF?
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New poll of 2,200 Americans found 54% knew Puerto Ricans are US citizens. Would love to see same folks polled about Hawaiians.
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Maybe it would be simpler to learn who in the Trump White House HASN’T used personal email for government business?
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In Palm Beach Gardens, a woman was arrested allegedly for trying to run down her lover with her Mercedes. Her intended victim happened to be her daughter’s husband. She told police he had recently told his wife about the affair, and the “revelation ruined her relationship with her daughter.”
Back on your game, Florida.
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From Marc Ragovin “So it looks like Trump will no longer invite nfl or nba teams to White House celebrations. “That is really gonna affect our plans,” said nobody on the Knicks.”
Categories: basketball jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: basketball jokes, Janice Hough, NCAA jokes
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September 21, 2017
Ryan Trahan, a Texas A&M athlete, has been told he may lose his eligibility over “Neptune bottles”, his ecologically friendly steel reusable bottle company, because the NCAA thinks it he might be profiting on his “athletics reputation or ability.”
Trahan, a freshman, is a cross-country runner. And we all know that sport is about the fame and big bucks. #WTF?
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LaGuardia power failure this am resulted in many flight delays. It was the biggest power outage for NY in the summer not involving the Mets.
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Anyone else think it’s not just their records – colors of #49ers #Rams uniforms make it look like watching college teams?
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Apparently #AaronHernandez had CTE. Maybe Mama Boucher was right about “foosball is of the devil.”
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Charles Barkley, scoffing at today’s “soft” NBA players, said when he was playing, players “flew commercial and we were able to play back-to-back.”
And we walked to school five miles in the snow, uphill, both ways…
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Ok, now it’s SNOWING in Montana. You don’t have to be a scientist to get the idea that Mother Nature is really not happy with us.
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Everyone thinking “relax, no way abomination known as #GrahamCassidy will pass” – we thought no way Trump gets elected either. #keepcalling
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So Jimmy Kimmel is being branded as a “Hollywood Elite” by supporters of our Reality Television Star President. #whythereisnosatire
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Entire island of Puerto Rico is w/out power; restoring it may take “months.” These are US citizens. Sorry Trump, “stay safe” isn’t enough.
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Iowa Sen Grassley on Graham-Cassidy “You know, I could maybe give you 10 reasons why this bill shouldn’t be considered. But Republicans campaigned on this so often that you have a responsibility to carry out what you said in the campaign.”
And why should this promise be different from most other campaign promises?
Facebook will now apparently release the Russian election ads, and Mark Zuckerberg said company was determined to make it “much harder” for anyone to interfere in elections and to “use our tools to undermine democracy.”
Then after his statement did Zuckerberg go out to lock the barn door and look for his horses?
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Haley –Trump name calling worked w/ Kim Jong Un- Every other international community referring to him as ‘Rocket Man.’” What are we, 6?
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Trump calls Kim Jong Un “Rocket Man” Kim Jong Un calls Trump “mentally deranged US dotard” This would all be much more entertaining if they both didn’t have weapons of mass destruction.
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#Dotard” – I guess you find it in the dictionary after “Covfefe.”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: 49ers jokes, Janice Hough, Kim Jong Un jokes, NCAA jokes, Trump jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
February 22, 2017
The Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum is sending the Apollo 11 Command Module on a tour around the U.S. to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the moon landing. 50 years?! Wow. Assume the capsule will travel cross country with its left blinker on.
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After receiving a new NCAA notice of allegations that brings the total to 21, Ole Miss officials announced they are self-imposing a one-year bowl ban for the 2017 season.
What a shame after their great 2016 bowl appearance…. oh, wait, they were 5-7. Never mind.
Rumors are that Kirk Cousins might be traded from the Redskins to the 49ers. Would be the owner equivalent of going from one frying pan into a younger frying pan.
In April, McDonald’s will have a promotion where all soft drinks, even the extra-large size, will be only $1. Using the restroom, however, may be $5.
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“7 Earth-size planets found orbiting nearby star” How long until Trump takes credit for making galaxy great again. HUGE
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So this intentional walk change in MLB is for real. Got a better idea with same time results, let the pitcher still throw his 4 pitches, but take one of the between-inning commercials and put it on half the screen. Then shorten one of those breaks. #dontmesswithbaseball
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Kellyanne Conway hasn’t been seen lately. Wonder if she’s in the same “undisclosed location” they used to put Dick Cheney?
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From Politico article talking to Trump associates “Leaving him alone for several hours can prove damaging, because he consumes too much television and gripes to people outside the White House.”
So basically Twitter has become his way of screaming “You punks get off my lawn?”
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If protestors were paid as often as @POTUS & @PressSec seem to think they are, they’d be rich enough to vote GOP.
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Pence says GOP will bring “individual responsibility back to American health care.” In other words, if you’re sick it’s your responsibility.
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So if transgender bathrooms are a states’ rights issue, does that mean that, for example, marijuana is too?
As much as some conservatives freak out, guessing most have been in bathrooms with transgenders & HAVEN’T EVEN NOTICED.
It’s as dangerous to allow trans kids in school bathrooms as it was to visit Bowling Green during the massacre. #ProtectTransKids
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Reportedly six White House staffers left last week after failing FBI background checks. Considering some of the stories on those who DID make it through, even to the Cabinet, you do have to wonder what these guys did.
Marc Ragovin FTW
Lakers President Jeanie Buss has fired her brother Jim because of the team’s poor record. “Amateur,” said Kim Jong-Un
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: 49ers jokes, Janice Hough, McDonalds jokes, NASA jokes, NCAA jokes, transgender jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
June 29, 2016
Following on the NBA championship of the Cavs, the Indians have won 12 games in a row. For those who think Cleveland’s just piling on, don’t worry, the Browns’ pre-season starts soon.
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The NCAA has a new rule that all bowl-eligible teams with 6-6 records must be chosen for a bowl before any teams with a 5-7 record are offered the games.
With all due respect, isn’t a bowl game for a .500 team the football equivalent of a participation trophy?
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The NFL Players Association doesn’t want the active players named in the Al-Jazeera PED report interviewed by the league, but Peyton Manning apparently will cooperate. So long as the interview is sponsored by Papa John’s and Budweiser.
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Michael Phelps tonight won the 200-meter butterfly and became the first U.S. male swimmer to qualify for five Olympics. Whereupon he celebrated by yelling “You punks get out of my pool.”
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2015 Seahawks backup QB Tarvaris Jackson was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon after a woman in Florida accused him of threatening her with a gun last week. Now, newly signed backup QB Trevone Boykin has been charged with assault causing bodily injury after an Dec 31 incident with a police officer at a bar before the Alamo Bowl.
Who’s next for Seattle? Johnny Manziel is available.
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Johnny Manziel says he is going sober on July 1. For the troubled QB’s sake, I hope he’s right. But hard not to quote Inigo Montoya: “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means”
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The Miss Teen USA pageant says they are dropping the swimsuit portion of their competition, replacing it with an athletic wear competition. For all men who only tuned in for the swimsuits, three words “tight yoga pants.
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The California “Adult Use of Marijuana Act” is officially on this November’s ballot. Well, it’s high time.
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#HeterosexualPrideDay. Really? Just go to a lot of frat houses, where every day is #HetrerosexualPrideDay.
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Regarding that story of Christy Sheats, the Texas mom and gun-rights advocate who fatally shot her daughters, reports are now that police had been called out 14 times since 2012 to their home, calls involving Christy’s having a “mental crisis.”
And she was still allowed to have guns? #wellplayedNRA #sarcasm
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Surprisingly little media attention to Istanbul only a day after the attacks. Must not have been any Americans killed. Sigh.
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I miss President Obama already: “Now somebody else who has never shown any regard for workers, who has never fought on behalf of social justice issues, they don’t suddenly become a populist because they say something controversial in order to win votes. That’s not the measure of populism. That’s nativism or xenophobia or worse. Or it’s just cynicism.”
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A new Quinnipiac University poll says Donald Trump has the support of 1% of black voters. That many?
Categories: baseball jokes, GOP jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Cleveland jokes, Janice Hough, Manziel jokes, marijuana jokes, Michael Phelps, NCAA jokes, NFL jokes, pageant jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
April 11, 2016
The NCAA reportedly approved a 3-year moratorium on new bowl games. What a disappointment for all those 6-6 teams who just missed last year’s postseason.
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That moment when even #ESPN on #BaseballTonight says “It’s an even year, don’t bet against the #SFGiants. #Hellhasfrozenover
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Jordan Spieth is still the favorite at 7-1 to win the U.S. Open in June, at the Oakmont Country Club in Pennsylvania. Assume Oakmont doesn’t have any water hazards?
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Even if you’re not a #Warriors fan have to appreciate that their quest for the record has knocked #KobeBryant farewell tour off #ESPN Wed
Urban Meyer is upset with the new NCAA rule deregulating electronic communication with potential recruits, which means coaches can now send unlimited texts to student-athletes. Translation, Urban Meyer doesn’t know how to text..
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Suppose we shouldn’t be shocked but Mr. “Make America Great” again can’t even make his children register to vote correctly? #cantfixstupid #butcanweelectstupid
Monday was #NationalPetDay. And cats are sniffing “EVERY day is National Cat Day.”
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Warriors announcer Bob Fitzgerald wasn’t very happy with Spurs fans waving thundersticks yesterday, calling them “some jerk off fans trying to screw up the telecast.” Well, if Golden State ends up playing back in San Antonio am sure those fans will go out of their way to be welcoming.
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The White House has asked Congress for $1.9 billion to fight Zika, and the CDC is saying “Everything we look at with this virus seems to be a bit scarier than we initially thought,” and that it has been linked to a “to a broader array of birth defects throughout a longer period of pregnancy…”
And the GOP in Congress is now accusing Obama of trying to “politicize” Zika. Right, because heaven forbid the US try to protect fetuses in a way that costs money
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Donald Trump says that John Brennan’s pledge not to waterboard is “ridiculous.” Right, because who knows more about effective interrogation, Trump or the director of the CIA? And who is Trump planning to appoint to the job – Jack Bauer?
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Joe Biden said in an interview that while both Democratic candidates are “totally qualified”, he would “like to see a woman elected.” Maybe especially because it would be easier for Joe to think Hillary was inevitable than to think he could have started late like Sanders and actually won.
Newly released court documents say that Robert Dear Jr., who confessed to killing three people at a Colorado Planned Parenthood clinic, told police he dreamed he’ll be met in Heaven by aborted fetuses wanting to thank him for saving unborn babies. So where are the GOP “pro-lifers” applauding him right here on Earth?
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Tim Spector, a professor at King’s College, London, said that dieting is less about calories, and more about good bacteria. So cheese, chocolate, nuts, and red wine are all smart choices for those trying to control their weight. Well, that calls for opening a bottle!
Categories: baseball jokes, football jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: ESPN jokes, Janice Hough, Kobe jokes, NCAA jokes, SFGiants jokes, spieth jokes, Trump jokes, Warriors jokes, wine jokes, zika jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
March 19, 2016
Tough loss for Yale after a valiant comeback against Duke today. But to ease the pain guessing when they get home the players’ butlers will make the martinis extra dry.
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Even with a loss, how often will these Ivy League #Yale kids have the life experience of being cheered as underdogs? #dukevsyale
Well, whatever other troubles #Obama has this week, having his #MarchMadness pick #Kansas out before the #Sweet16 won’t be one of them.
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Between the #CBS #MarchMadness shows and the commercials I think we’re just not seeing enough of #CharlesBarkley
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That moment when ESPN tells you you’re at about the 92th percentile in their March Madness brackets going into Saturday night games andnd then you realize that in a midnight whim you picked Gonzaga into the Sweet Sixteen…. 🙂 (Am now 97% – #dumbluck #abouttofall :-)))
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Stat of the night from #ESPN: #Warriors & #Spurs combined have fewer losses going into tonight (16) than next best team (#Cavaliers 19).
And even tonight, (17 )
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Wonder how many #MarchMadness players watched #GSvsSA game and realized some #Spurs stars are old enough to be their fathers? #GoSpursGo
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Okay, heaven knows I am not a Donald Trump fan. But trying to protest by blocking public roads? Chris Christie can tell you that’s not a winning political strategy.
A U.S. Court of Appeals dismissed a class-action lawsuit filed by a woman that Fresh Inc, tricks customers with their $24 “Sugar Lip Treatment” because only 75% of the product twists up beyond the tube opening, so you have to dig the last 25% out. . Uh, just maybe because if you really care about that kind of value you could just buy a $2 Chapstick?
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An 18 year-old showing his gun to his friend accidentally fatally shot that friend on Friday in Copiague, New York, Your move, Florida. #ifonlyhisfriendwasarmed
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Now Trump is questioning if Mitt Romney is really a Mormon? What’s next, will Trump ask if the Pope is Catholic?
So in the general election does #Trump plan to question if #Hillary is really a woman?
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Herman Cain says Donald Trump is not a racist. Nein, nein, nein.
From Marc Ragovin, “Bernie Sanders campaigned in Flagstaff, Az. the other day. Although the way his run has been going, he should have chosen Tombstone.”
Categories: March madness jokes, political jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: brackets jokes, Janice Hough, March madness jokes, NCAA jokes, NCAA tournament jokes, Spurs jokes, Trump jokes, Warriors jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
March 18, 2016
So will the DVD of the 2016 Men’s Basketball Tournament be titled “The Bad Seeds” #MarchMadness
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Looking like the folks who seeded the NCAA tournament were about as good at their jobs as the Michigan Democratic pollsters who had that big win for Hillary.
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Oops. #marchmadness headline “Las Vegas SuperBook Has Michigan State As Favorite To Win NCAA Tournament”
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Only thing that could have saved #MichiganState today was a #JimHarbaugh punt. #MarchMadness
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Many thought #MichiganState should have had a #1 seed. So would they have lost to #16 seed #Hampton too? #MarchMadness
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Even #MiddleTennesseeState alums didn’t have them winning this game. #MichiganState #MarchMadness
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Happy 2nd round of March Madness. That morning when millions of Americans wake up and realize their retirement plan will not include millions made on betting the perfect bracket.
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73-67 #Warriors over #Mavericks at halftime. Did someone decide to play by #NBA All-Star Game rules and not tell us?
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This kid clearly wants to be drafted by the Spurs and Gregg Popovich. Or at least Pop wants him as his media spokesman: Baylor’s Taurean Prince, asked after their upset loss how the Bears were out-rebounded by Yale. “You grab it with two hands, and you come down with it, and that’s considered a rebound. So they got more of those than we did.”
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The Colts are going to retire Peyton Maning’s #18 and build him a statue. But before it’s installed the Broncos are interested in seeing if the statue can lead them to another Super Bowl win.
Chicago White Sox star pitcher Chris Sale says the team is demanding a meeting with chariman Jerry Reinsdorf over Adam LaRoche’s retirement and executive V.P Ken Williams “bold-faced” lying to players.
Remember the good old days when the White Sox’s biggest problem was Ozzie Guillen shooting off his mouth?
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Former Toronto Mayor Rob Ford is seriously ill and in the hospital with cancer. Wishing him the best. Hard to realize now but there was a time not that long ago when Ford might have been the brashest, loudest and most politically-incorrect politician in North America.
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Hulk Hogan won $115 million in a lawsuit after Gawker published a sex tape of him with his (then) best-friend’s wife. Now that’s the kind of combination of money and family values that might get Hogan an offer of a place in a Trump cabinet.
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On brighter note, #MittRomney‘s awful 2012 Presidential campaign is no longer the most embarrassing performance out of Michigan. #MichiganState
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Sad news that Ravens CB Troy Walker, 23, has died after an accident on a dirt bike, when he was apparently riding in dark clothing at night without lights and collided with a car. Proving alas that with all the dangers in the world, high up there is testosterone poisoning.
FOX News is slamming Donald Trump for his vitriolic attacks against Megyn Kelly and his extreme, sick obsession with her.” FOX thinks such vitriol and obsession should be reserved for Hillary Clinton.
Categories: GOP jokes, March madness jokes, political jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: 73-67 #Warriors over #Mavericks at halftime. Did someone decide to play by #NBA All-Star Game rules and not tell us? -, March madness jokes, Michigan state jokes, middle tennessee jokes, NCAA jokes, tournament jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
March 18, 2016
#Duke vs #Yale for a #SweetSixteen berth. Most of America will find this as appealing as a choice between #Trump and #Cruz #MarchMadness
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But really, Yale vs. Duke? Hope the Dunkin’ Donuts Center in Providence sends out a rush order for extra chardonnay.
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North Carolina started 2nd half on a 22-6 run after being basically tied with Florida Gulf Coast at halftime. Did coach Roy Williams remind the Tarheels at halftime that no one may remember who wins in any given year, but being the first #1 seed to lose to a #16 would be forever.
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Nice for the kids playing in early March Madness games today. They got to relax and watch players their dad’s age kicking the crap out of the Trail Blazers. #Spurs
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Sorry, when a #9 beats an #8 you do not get to crow all day about picking an upset in your bracket. #MarchMadness
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Seriously, does #Butler EVER lose in the first round? #MarchMadness
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So I no longer have a perfect bracket, but I did figure out the channel for TruTV. #smallvictories.
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MLB has announced Yasiel Puig will not be disciplined for an November alleged domestic violence incident involving his sister at a Miami nightclub. Is it too soon to start a pool on the date of Puig’s next incident?
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A U.S. college student has been sentenced to 15 years hard labor in North Korea for stealing a propaganda poster of Kim Jong Il from a restricted area at a hotel. So really, is he being sentenced for the theft or for the stupidity?
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Anonymous has decided to release Donald Trump’s personal information. Waiting for the Donald to demand we need to start deporting all hackers. #thiscouldbefun
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Laura Bush, after talking about isolationism and xenophobia then told a reporter “‘Don’t ask’ if I’ll vote for Trump.” Hmm, maybe SHE’s the smart one in the family.
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As if you needed more reason not to go to Carl’s Jr., whose founder was staunchy anti-choice and anti-gay, the CEO has he wants to open a completely automated restaurant with no human employees. Well, makes sense, most actual humans don’t want to eat there either.
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Chip Kelly on Colin Kaepernick “If he’s here on April 4 we’re going to coach the heck out of him, and he’s going to work his (tail) off.”
Sounds like Kelly is behind Kap 1,000%. #ifyougetthisreferenceyoumightbeold
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Sarah Palin said her husband is still in intensive care but she is “so thankful for today’s medical technology including 3-D X-rays, temporary pain blocks and epidurals. I’m voting for their continued use…” But of course Palin can’t wait to get back on the road to campaign against Obamacare.
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Many in the GOP love to quote “the Biden rule” about approving a Supreme Court Judge. But one, Biden was talking about a judge deliberately retiring to allow a president to pick another younger justice with the same views, and two, this was in 1992, and Biden said “before the political season is underway.” As if in 2016 the “political season’ ever stops.
Marco Rubio says he’s not interested in running for V.P. in 2016. Translation, maybe he can’t stand Trump or Cruz any more than many of us.
Categories: baseball jokes, GOP jokes, March madness jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Janice Hough, March madness jokes, NCAA jokes, tournament jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
March 16, 2016
This year like every year with the NCAA tournament many Americans fantasize about a 16 beating a 1. Well, the Lakers DID beat the Warriors….
Sellout crowd in Dayton for a #FirstFour game between Tulsa and Michigan. Just guessing there isn’t a lot to do in Dayton.
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Researchers are now saying that CTE could result from any contact sports. So maybe when Roger Goodell said that the risk playing youth football was similar to the risk of “sitting on your couch” he meant if your team’s play on Sunday (or in March Madness) caused you to start banging your head into the wall.
Apparently some of the Chicago Cubs are not happy with the new rules banning smoke-less tobacco for players at Wrigley Field. John Lackey” “We’re grown men. People in the stands can have a beer, but we can’t do what we want? That’s a little messed up.”
Uh, people in the stands can bet on the game at casinos too.
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Adam LaRoche retired and is giving up $13 million because the White Sox say he can’t keep bringing his 14 year-old son into the clubhouse. Just thinking if LaRoche hit say, .297 instead of the.207 he hit year the team would have not only still allowed the kid but designed him bats and washed his uniforms.
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One of United Airline’s new security questions for their Mileage Plus accounts is “What month is your best friend’s birthday?” And millions of men are going “WTF, I’m lucky if I can remember what month is my WIFE’S birthday.”
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At the Cincinnati Zoo today, a polar bear got out of its enclosure, but apparently has been “contained.” Who knows the reason for the escape. Maybe the bear thought it had a right to be armed?
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Donald Trump says “there could be riots” if he loses the nomination. As opposed to the riots if he wins it?
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So if Senate GOP won’t even consider Merrick Garland, who even Judge Roberts likes, they are saying they think they’ll get a better option from President Trump or Clinton? #batshitcrazy
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So if Hillary Clinton gets elected but the Dems don’t take back the Senate will Mitch McConnell declare in January 2017 that since it is only 36 months until the last year of her term it would be inappropriate to consider any pick she makes for the Supreme Court?
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So now some Republicans are saying they might consider President Obama’s Supreme court pick in November if Clinton wins the election. At which point Obama should pull back Garland and nominate someone to the left of RBG.
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Apparently a new Donald Trump ad against Hillary ad has footage of Clinton barking like a dog to mimic still another ad against her last month. The tag line? “We don’t need to be a punchline!”
And someone in the Trump campaign wrote that with a straight face….
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Jerry Springer said of the GOP primary “if they’re going to do my show, they should start paying me.” Are you kidding, there’s no way the Republican debates and primary process have had the calm, reasoned maturity of the Jerry Springer show. #bycomparison
“The president told me several times he’s going to name a moderate but I don’t believe him. [Obama] could easily name Merrick Garland, who is a fine man. He probably won’t do that because this appointment is about the election. So I’m pretty sure he’ll name someone the [liberal Democratic base] wants.”
Senator Orrin Hatch, MARCH 13, 2016.
I do not think I would play chess with Obama.
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Categories: airline jokes, GOP jokes, March madness jokes, Supreme court jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: basketball jokes, Cubs jokes, Janice Hough, March madness jokes, Merrick Garland jokes, NCAA jokes, Supreme Court jokes, Trump jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
March 15, 2016
And haven’t pressed “submit” tonight, either you don’t care or shouldn’t you be working on your brackets?
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As we approach March Madness, remember, nothing is certain but death, taxes, and Kansas finding a way to lose before the finals.
In retrospect one reason shows like “The Bachelor” are so popular – you get to watch people make really stupid decisions and it doesn’t affect the fate of the world? #Presidentialprimaries
So now Pete Rose’s lawyer is denying that Rose sent Trump a baseball saying “Mr. Trump, please make America great again.” The Donald claims the baseball was an endorsement.
And how could you doubt either of these fine gentlemen? #sarcasm
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Disney has announced that Harrison Ford, 73, will return for a fifth Indiana Jones movie in 2019. Only this time the lost relic will be Jones himself.
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The US House is holding two hearings on the water crisis in Flint, Michigan. Would that they keep at this with the same intensity they have on Benghazi.
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New England Patriots safety Nate Ebner will take a leave of absence from the team to train for the U.S. rugby team and this summer’s Olympics. Other international rugby teams just demanded a guard on the rugby balls.
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A traffic monitoring group says that the average San Francisco commuter spent more than three days in traffic in 2015. And down in Los Angeles they’re thinking “amateurs.”
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Rick Pitino, defending his embattled Louisville program, says that the problem was a graduate assistant, Andre McGee “whose sole responsibility was to make sure they do the right things.”
Right, because in major programs, all graduate assistants have the power and the $$$$$$ to hire prostitutes. And none of the coaching staff would have any clue.
I think I like “pushed into a lifeboat better.”
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Hillary Clinton was caught on a “hot mic” speculating about Chris Christie’s reasons for endorsing Donald Trump. “Did he have a debt or something?” Whatever you think of Hillary, the woman is not stupid.
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So what’s the difference between #MarcoRubio and #JebBush? About three weeks? #GOPPrimary
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Ben Carson, in explaining why he endorsed the Donald, said that even if Trump “turns out not to be such a great president … we’re only looking at four years.” as opposed to if the Democrats win “multiple generations and perhaps the loss of the American dream forever.”
Wow, well at least someone thinks Hillary is powerful.
So folks saying they always knew #Trump #Clinton would be 2016 Pres. candidates also will pretend their 1st weekend brackets are perfect?
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Donald #Trump is saying. “We need to bring our party together.”. And never has Tonto’s quote been more apt – “Who’s ‘we’. white man?”
#TedCruz, doubling down on promise to be a strong president for Israel. Sorry, I thought we were choosing President for the US? #GOPPrimary
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Since #TedCruz might be last alternative to #DonaldTrump would like to thank the San Antonio #Spurs for reminding us of the possibilities of sanity in Texas.
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Jerry Brown, “If Trump were ever elected, we’d have to build a wall around California to defend ourselves from the rest of this country.”
Another reason we Californians love Governor Moonbeam 2.0. (He did add “By the way that is a joke. We don’t like walls, we like bridges.”)
Categories: GOP jokes, pitino jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Bachelor jokes, Florida jokes, Janice Hough, March madness jokes, NCAA jokes, NCAA tournament jokes, Rubio jokes, tournament jokes, Trump jokes
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March 14, 2016
Open note to whoever leaked the NCAA tournament brackets, and thus spoiled CBS’s efforts to turn the selection show into a bloated two-hour commercial fest; mean bitch Karma wants to shake your hand.
Coach John Calipari is not happy with Kentucky’s #4 seed. Because few of his one-and-dones can count that high?
The NCAA is looking into finding out who leaked their #MarchMadness brackets. While they’re at it can they also find the person who decided a two-hour selection show was a good idea? #criminalstupidity.
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Stanford has fired men’s basketball coach Johnny Dawkins. What ingratitude for the man who brought them 2 NIT championships.
ESPN reports that in a Congressional committee discussion today on concussions Jeff Miller, the NFL’s senior V.P. for health and safety was asked if the link between football and neurodegenerative diseases like CTE has been established: And he said “The answer to that question is certainly yes.
Hmm, is this because Mike Ditka endorsed Trump?
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My friend Pat Markevitch saw a Marco Rubio rally on TV.. A Sanders supporter was in the crowd holding up a Bernie sign. Rubio said “Don’t worry, you won’t get beat up at my rally”.
Isn’t it nice to know someone in the GOP has standards?
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I may make jokes about Florida, where I went to high school. But my friends who still live there get revenge every four years – because their votes actually COUNT in a presidential primary and election. #Californiabluerthanblue
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Polls showing #Trump crushing #Rubio in Florida. Is this because Floridians really don’t know Trump, or because they really do know Rubio?
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Tinder apparently was down Monday. The horror. So Americans had to meet their Ms. and Mr. Right Nows the old fashioned way – in a bar.
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Sarah Palin canceled her appearance at a Trump rally because her husband Todd has been injured in a snow machine crash. Waiting to see how they can make this Obama’s fault.
So after feeling the TEENIEST bit guilty for making a bus to hell joke about Todd Palin’s snow machine accident, I now hear that Sarah Palin, on her way back from Florida to Alaska to see him, stopped off to appear at a Trump rally…. #johnmccainsgiftthatkeepsongiving .
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Pete Rose is the latest to endorse Trump: The Donald is really racking up the famous athletes who had a lot of collisions with other players and walls.
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Ditka, Rose, Hogan, Damon…. The list of Trump endorsers grows. So how does it not yet include Donald Sterling?
Metro North and LIRR commuter trains to and from New York City normally allow riders to drink. But they will be dry Thursday, St Patrick’s Day, through 5 a.m. Friday. Meaning, it’s chug-a-lug time before boarding. #ifonlytheywereallarmed
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Florida jokes, Janice Hough, March madness jokes, NCAA jokes, NCAA tournament jokes, Trump jokes
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March 13, 2016
LSU turned down an NIT invitation and said they will not play in this postseason. Well, with 38 points in the SEC opening game not like they played in that tournament either.
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SF Giants infield definitely leading the league in college boys – Posey/FSU, Belt/Texas, Panik/St. Johns, Crawford/UCLA, Duffy/Long Beach St, Susac/Oregon State, Tomlinson/Texas Tech… And Mac Williamson/Wake Forest, Osich/Oregon State, Samardzjia/Notre Dame….
Should be fun during March Madness.
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Mississippi State’s Dak Prescott, expected to be one of the first QB’s taken in next month’s draft, was arrested yesterday for DUI. So was Prescott just trying to prove he’s NFL ready?
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Categories: GOP jokes, political jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: 76ers jokes, bracket jokes, Janice Hough, March madness jokes, NCAA jokes, NCAA tournament, tournament jokes, Trump jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
June 11, 2015
Two Texas girls, 7 and 8, trying to raise money for Father’s Day, had their lemonade stand shut down by police for lack of a permit. Well, of course, it’s Texas. The girls should have been doing something safer like borrowing their parents’ guns to set up a shooting range.
So after game 1 of the NBA finals the “experts” said the Cavs had no chance, then after games 2 and 3, that the Warriors were in big trouble. And now they’re planning the Golden State parade again. Which means Cleveland is likely to win game 5?
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Stay classy, GOP. Senator Mark Kirk from Illinois, during a Senate Appropriations Committee hearing: “I’ve been joking with Lindsey (Graham). Did you see that? He’s going to have a rotating first lady. He’s a bro with no ho.”
(and just for a minute, can we imagine the reaction on Fox News if a Democratic senatory said that?)
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After five players were suspended last year for academic reasons, and QB Everett Golson transferred, Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly said today that all his players are “at-risk” academically. “Honestly, I don’t know that any of our players would get into the school by themselves right now with the academic standards the way they are. Maybe one or two of our players that are on scholarship.”
And down in the SEC and ACC they’re going “What academic standards?”
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Florida Gov. Rick Scott signed a new law requiring women to wait at least 24 hours to have an abortion. Of course if they really wanted to reduce unwanted pregnancies and possible abortions the state would impose the same waiting period for men wanting to have sex.
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Beech Grove, Indiana mayor Dennis Buckley, talking about trouble and recent arrests. “This isn’t anything new. We have been concerned about this for at least two years, and there have been just some quiet talks with (them) concerning the number of police runs down there and the fact that they’re draining our resources every single day. It’s my opinion as mayor that this has to stop.”
Is he talking about some bar, restaurant or strip club? Nope, Buckley’s talking about the local Wal-Mart.
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Pizza Hut, in an effort to increase sagging market share, has introduced a pizza with mini hot dogs in the crust. The only problem with promotions like this, if they work, they decrease the number of years customers will be around to buy Pizza Hut products.
Whole Foods is opening new chain of lower-priced stores that will be called “365 by Whole Foods Market.” (365 is a house label for Whole Foods products.) But if they really want to attract shoppers who both know their brand and want to save money, why doesn’t the chain call the new markets “Half Paycheck.”?
From my funny friend Alex Kaseberg “As great as Triple Crown winner, American Pharoah, was at the Belmont Stakes, he would have lost in 1973 to Secretariat by 15 lengths. To put 15 lengths in perspective, that is over ten Kim Kardashian asses.”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: GOP jokes, NBA finals jokes, NCAA jokes, Texas jokes, Walmart jokes, Whole Foods jokes
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May 12, 2015
Dennis Norfleet, Michigan’s all-time leader in kick returns and kick return yards has been dismissed from the program over a disciplinary issue with new coach Jim Harbaugh. Shall we start a pool with which SEC team Norfleet will end up?
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Jim Harbaugh and Michigan have self-reported four minor violations to the NCAA. One of them, that he sent an autographed helmet and jersey to a high school auction benefiting a scholarship fund. (Which apparently Jim didn’t know was illegal.) Really good to see that the NCAA is focused on the important things.
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Verizon is buying AOL. In hopes that finally two wrongs do make a right?
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So apparently in yesterday’s apparent road rage incident involving George Zimmerman, both Zimmerman and the man who allegedly shot him -resulting in minor injuries -had guns with them at the time. And Darwin is thinking “Missed a two-fer by THAT much”
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Tom Brady’s agent has accused Ted Wells of running a biased “sting” investigation on “Deflategate”, and Wells has fired back defending himself and the report. I’m wondering how long until one of the fired Patriots’ employees decides to supplement his severance pay with a book deal…..#whenyoureinaholestopdigging?
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Today President Obama’s Tuesday fast-track trade deal was stalled in the Senate….by Democrats. And over at Fox News heads are exploding. #dowehavetopickaside?
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Just got a pre-sale notice for the Radio City Music Hall Christmas Spectacular. So is it time for stores to start decorating?
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The U.K. Daily Mail is reporting that the real reason Lindsey Vonn and Tiger Woods split up is that she found out he cheated on her. “I can’t believe Tiger would do that” said nobody.
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A woman gave birth on an AIr Canada flight to Japan, and said she hadn’t even known she was pregnant. Another graduate of “Abstinence only” education?
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Donald Trump has apparently TRADEMARKED the slogan “Make America Great Again” for his Presidential campaign. Is he trying to top “Mission Accomplished?”
Per Duane Kuiper, #SFGiants are hitting 5 for 26 with the bases loaded in 2015. Matt #Duffy with the bases loaded is 3 for 4. #McGehee who?
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The SF Giants have a much maligned farm system. But starting today. Pitcher Chris Heston, catcher Buster Posey, first baseman Brandon Belt, second baseman Joe Panik, shortshop Brandon Crawford, and third baseball Matt Duffy. Every single one of them home-grown talent.
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MLB has tightened security for its game balls after Deflategate. Angels pitcher C.J. Wilson commented “Obviously, there’s not as much that you can do to baseballs. I mean, you can’t change the density of the baseball at any point — unless you dunk them in water. Then they’re going to be 9 ounces, and everyone’s going to blow their arms out.” Hmm. wonder how he knew that?
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Lindsay Lohan, who still has more than half of her 250 mandated community service hours to go from a 2013 reckless driving conviction, apparently missed her first day Tuesday at a Brooklyn preschool. This could really put her in jeopardy with Hollywood’s “37 strikes and you’re out” policy.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: deflategate jokes, George Zimmerman jokes, Harbaugh jokes, Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, SF Giants jokes, Tiger jokes, Tom Brady jokes, Trump jokes
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April 8, 2015
The NCAA’s supervisor of officials said none of them saw the CBS video feed on the controversial out-of-bounds call at the end of the national championship game. But today Dan Gavitt, the NCAA’s VP told ESPN that officials DID see it. Ah, well this ought to reassure all the Duke conspiracy theorists….
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The Boston Celtics are making a late push for the #8 seed in the Eastern Conference. Isn’t that the NBA equivalent of making it to the March Madness play-in game?
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The mayor of Hillsboro, Mo, population 2,800, died March 9, but was re-elected yesterday. Well, maybe the voters figured, it’s been a month, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
New York Knicks owner James Dolan just said in an interview “You got to believe, baby! I believe, I believe!” And even Cubs fans are saying “Are you bleeping nuts?”
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Someone is selling a New Orleans Saints Super Bowl ring on Craigslist. Maybe one of the Jets should buy it, might be their best chance at getting a ring.
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Mitt Romney who had Duke over Wisconsin in the NCAA championship, tweeted “Should have put $10,000 on my bracket. Congrats, Coach K and @DukeU,” Prompting an immediate call for Romney to reconsider entering the 2016 race, from Pete Rose.
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I understand the American way of justice, and it’s mostly a good thing. Still seems somehow odd to spend millions of dollars saving a critically injured man’s life, and then millions of dollars to try him, and then probably now millions of dollars over appeals to a death penalty conviction. #BostonMarathonExplosion
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A new book about the White House says that during a fight after the Monica Lewinsky affair came to light, Hillary Clinton called Bill a “g*ddamn b*stard” and that she had him sleep on a couch for a few months. Some say the revelations could hurt Hillary’s candidacy. Thinking it might make a lot of women like her better.
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Aqib Talib, a CB for the Denver Broncos, who had charges dropped after an alleged gun incident in 2011, is apparently being investigated again for allegedly firing a gun into the air during a fight at a Dallas nightclub. So clearly the Aaron Hernandez trial is serving as a cautionary lesson to other NFL players. #facepalm #cantfixstupid
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Pitcher Chris Heston missed his Opening Day start for the Sacramento River Cats. Bummer. #SFGiants
(and the way his start went, he may never have that start.)
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The media is reporting that last year Barry Manilow married his manager and apparently long time partner. Garry Kief. I am shocked, said absolutely positively nobody.
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A scary thought about that South Carolina case. If the person with the cellphone video saw what really happened, what about that officer’s partner?
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As Rand Paul is getting unfavorable coverage for lecturing journalists, especially female journalists, on how to do their jobs, #”#Randsplaining is trending on Twitter. Well, it’s a good thing for Paul that if he stays in the Presidential race he won’t have to be dealing with this sort of thing in future. #cantfixstupid #cantfixarrogant either.
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Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Clinton jokes, Duke jokes, Janice Hough, Jets jokes, NBA jokes, NCAA jokes, Rand Paul jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 7, 2015
Oops. The NCAA’s supervisor of officials admitted today that the officials who gave possession to Duke after a late out-of-bounds play, didn’t have all the angles that CBS had. Although the TV replay showed the Blue Devils’ Winslow touching the ball with his fingertips. But to be fair, with amateur sports it’s not like the NCAA really has the money to do it right.
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If we’re going to have legalized discrimination, can some state become a pioneer in saying businesses do not have to serve stupid people? Because #cantfixstupid
Mitt Romney finished in the the top 1% of contestants in the ESPN NCAA tournament challenge, having Duke and Wisconsin and Duke winning it all. President Obama was in the 40th percentile. Of course, had Obama done as well as Romney the GOP would accuse him of having neglected his duties to focus on basketball.
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Kentucky coach John Calipari says he expects “five to seven players” to declare for the NBA draft. It’s a scary choice for these young men. But since returnees must be academically eligible, they’ll have to figure out how to find the classrooms.
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From Marty Robinson: “In Monday night’s NCAA championship game, Duke rallied to beat Wisconsin, earning their 5th title in the Coach K era. “Wonderful” said absolutely nobody outside of Durham.”
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Last night’s Miami Marlins opener was delayed 16 minutes by rain in the second inning, because the roof operators couldn’t get the roof closed fast enough. If only their supervisor had been armed.
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As pictures of all of these plastic cups full of something that isn’t beer circulate after Opening Night for the Cubs at Wrigley Field, here’s a tip for other teams: If you are doing a major renovation on your stadium, do the bathrooms first.
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Norwegian Cruise Line has an “enhanced” room service menu on some of their ships. And those menus will include a “convenience charge” of up to $7.95 per order. “Convenience charge?”! And many airlines are thinking, why didn’t we think of that?
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Mercedes Benz is coming out with a pickup truck. The perfect vehicle for all those cowboy politicians who still want to pretend they can relate to the “common man.”
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LeGarrette Blount, suspended 3 times at Oregon, and arrested last year for marijuana possession has now been suspended without pay for the 1st game of the 2015 season for a “violation of the league’s substance abuse policy.” This is clearly part of football’s strict “10 strikes and you’re out” policy.
An unnamed NBC source told Vanity Fair that Brian Williams “could not say the words ‘I lied.’ …He couldn’t explain what had happened. Asking ‘Did something happen to [my] head? Maybe I had a brain tumor, or something in my head?'”
Sounds increasingly clear that Williams was in the wrong business, He sounds less like a newsman than a politician.
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Despite a perhaps less than stellar record, Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel has won re-election. Should we be surprised? The town’s residents have a long history of supporting the “devil you know.” I mean, how many people have given up being Cubs fans?
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Lots of headlines about Derick and Jill Dillard (neé Duggar, of “19 Kids and Counting” having their first baby last night…. And thinking, as popular as this show is in some circles, wonder what the reaction would be if they were African-American?
Don McLean’s ‘American Pie’ manuscript sold for $1.2 million, Now, “American Pie” is iconic enough that even the younger generation knows the song. But many of them are wondering “What’s a manuscript?”
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A white police officer has been arrested and charged with murder after a video showed him repeatedly shooting and killing a 50 year old black man who was running away. Well, this might get some changes made. Wonder how many states will outlaw cellphone videos?
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The scariest thing about #WalterScott video is wondering how many of these shootings have happened where there is no cellphone video.
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Rand Paul is the latest to declare for 2016. While Paul has many interesting libertarian policies, he’s also come up with gems like this, opposing mandatory vaccination because of “many tragic cases of walking, talking normal children who wound up with profound mental disorders after vaccines.” Sigh #Cantfixstupid Even with medical school degrees.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: American Pie jokes, Chicago jokes, Cubs jokes, Don Mclean, Duggar jokes, Duke jokes, Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, Rand Paul jokes, Wisconsin jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
April 5, 2015
Some Kentucky players didn’t shake Wisconsin’s hands, Andrew Harrison calls Kaminsky the N-word. Guess another problem with the one-and-done mentality is that not only do professors not teach them anything, Calipari didn’t teach them how to lose.
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But really, Wisconsin had motivation from a Final Four loss last year late on a Kentucky 3-point shot. Had many Wildcats been revenge minded from 2014 they’d have had to track down high school opponents.
Frank Kaminsky said of the racial slur from Andrew Harrison after the racial slur last night. “He reached out to me, we talked about it, [I’m] over it, Nothing needs to be made out of it.”Classy of Frank. Of course, maybe it helps that a- this might have been the first time that a white guy from Illinois with Polish heritage got attacked with the N word, and b – the Badgers won.
At least 29 arrests in Lexington after Kentucky’s loss to Wisconsin last night. Come on, can’t they make it 38 misdemeanors and 1 felony?
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Well, on the brighter side for Kentucky players, they’ll get a lot more comfortable in losing next year playing next year for the 76ers, Lakers, Knicks…
Apparently after the semi-final game, Kentucky fans were rioting and lighting things on fire in the streets. Imagine how classy they would have been if the Wildcats actually won.
“Tell him good bye.” #LonSimmns, 91, has passed away. Another great who will not outlast Candlestick. #Byebyebaby
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Rick Santorum, “Tolerance is a two-way street. If you’re a print shop and you are a gay man, should you be forced to print ‘God hates fags’ for the Westboro Baptist Church because they hold those signs up?” Uh oh. Is Santorum feeling so confident that he’s willing to risk the truly looney vote?
The Obama family attended Easter Sunday Alexandria’s Alfred Street Baptist Church, a predominantly African-American church. No doubt the reaction from many conservatives was split between accusing the President of pandering to minorities, to saying this confirmed his Muslim Baptist tendencies.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Janice Hough, jokes about march madness, Kentucky jokes, March Madness, NCAA jokes, Wisconsin jokes
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Left Coast Sports Babe 