Posted tagged ‘Trump jokes’

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Bracket building

March 13, 2017

As Americans focus on their brackets, many sites ask for tie-breakers like guessing the score of the final game. Wouldn’t it be more a test of skill to ask entrants to name one player on each of their final four teams?

 

As everyone expected, one Tim Duncan retired the Spurs had a shot for best record in NBA.

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Tim Tebow got his 1st hit of Spring Training for the Mets today. Hope he didn’t trip on his way to first over that blind squirrel carrying a nut.

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Mexico eliminated from #WBC after given wrong information on tie-breakers #WTF? So Trump will blame baseball when they don’t pay for wall.

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Every time he opens his mouth, #SteveKing shatters the myth of white supremacy.

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Kellyanne Conway is now backpedaling on her claim that Obama was spying on Trump with microwaves and TVs, saying she was speaking “generally” and “I’m not Inspector Gadget.”
What, her claims aren’t just #alternativeevidence?”

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KellyanneConway “I’m not in the job of having evidence.” Well, when she’s right, she’s right.

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Jonathan Tran, the White House fence jumper, was released on his own recognizance, ordered to comply with a mental health evaluation and told he cannot have guns. Where’s the NRA outrage on this one?

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Trump’s latest tweet -“It is amazing how rude much of the media is to my very hard working representatives. Be nice, you will do much better!”
Yeah, the media is so rude, they occasionally fact check and remind Trump people of what they themselves actually might have said in the past. Tragic, really.

 

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So were people massacred in Bowling Green because they knew too much about the building of surveillance microwaves and televisions?

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CBO report  Proposed GOP healthcare will result in 14 million fewer insured by 2018 Waiting for Trump & company to tweet about #alternativenumbers

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So did someone in GOP say hell would freeze over before they’d take people’s insurance? #blizzard2017

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Clearly Trump was wrong when he accused Obama of tapping his phones. Obama was REALLY tapping his microwaves.

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Obamacare promise “If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor.” Trumpcare promise- “If you like staying alive you can keep staying alive.”

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Apparent rationale behind #Trumpcare is rural low-income older folks dumb enough to have voted for him don’t deserve healthcare.

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Schwarzenegger says he is not running for Senate. Turning down a chance to be the sanest reality star in Washington?

 

In women’s NCAA tournament, #UConn, winner of 107 straight, was given overall #1 seed. In related news committee announced water was wet.

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One brief shining minute.

March 7, 2017

So if the Cavs win it all this year, does Andrew Bogut get a ring?

(Bogut was injured about 30 seconds into his first game with Cleveland.)

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Your tax $$ at work. Andrew Bogut, before his injury,  couldn’t practice before game w/ #Cavs today because of work visa issues. Ah those scary Australians.

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After Kawhi Leonard’s 39 point performance tonight in a 112-110 win over the Rockets, which included a late clutch three, a block and then two game clinching free throws, the Spurs star got chosen for a “random” drug test. Will the test reveal if Kawhi was born on this planet?

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Israel beat South Korea and Taipei in #WorldBaseballClassic. Shocking even serious baseball fans who didn’t realize Israel had a team in #WBC

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GM to lay off 1,100 in Michigan. Somehow I missed the Trump tweet taking credit.

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The Israeli cabinet approved a plan to decriminalize marijuana. Cool. Two words: kosher Doritos.

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Meanwhile, in England, parliament is debating a ban on high heels in the workplace. Seems to me there’s a simple solution, high heels can be a required part of the dress code if men have to wear them too..

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#BenCarson talks about “immigrants who came here in bottom of slave ships.” Proving again. even med schools have share of #cantfixstupid

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Somehow I must have missed Ben Carson talking about the immigrants who built those grain silos in Egypt.

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So now Kellyanne Conway says of Trump’s claim that Obama wiretapped Trump Tower “He’s the President of the United States. He has information and intelligence that the rest of us do not.”
Forgetting perhaps that Trump doesn’t believe in intelligence briefings?

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The chaotic first Trump travel ban was immediate because “if the ban were announced with a one week notice, the ‘bad’ would rush into our country during that week.” The revised ban signed today takes effect March 16. So the “bad dudes” have slowed down?”

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The U.S. Soccer Federation has a new policy that says national team players “shall stand respectfully” during national anthems.
So good to see such a fine upstanding sport as soccer is focused on what’s really important.

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So it’s $200,000 to get into #MaraLago & hang out w/ Trump on weekends. What’s the price for where he’s planning to spend summer weekends?

 

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Reducing # of insured by 20 million in US will take care of some of Social Security deficit. Can’t collect benefits when dead.

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The GOP proposal to replace Obamacare would allow insurers to charge 30% more to anyone who goes without coverage for more than 2 months, or to anyone who turns 27 and doesn’t immediately buy their own insurance.
But this isn’t a mandate. The same as the travel EO isn’t a Muslim ban. #sarcasm

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Distractions.

February 17, 2017

Pittsburgh police are allegedly considering multiple felony charges against Jets CB Darrelle Revis for his role in a “street altercation early Monday morning.”
Is this a shameless attempt to get the Knicks out of the NY headlines?

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Barry Zito’s first album has now made the Billboard Country Music chart, debuting at #39.  39. What are the odds?  The same number as the speed of Zito’s fastball.

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Any chance we can take a page from the @NBA and start instituting technical fouls for Presidents?

Tonight at Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport a Frontier Airlines and Southwest flight clipped wings. No injuries, although both planes were evacuated. But presumably Southwest requested the video for a “wanna get away” commercial.

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Delta is planning to add free meals back to long-haul flights within the US in coach class. Of course, any $20 or so increase in domestic fares would be purely a coincidence.

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The #Thimble token has been voted out of the Monopoly game. And millennials are going “What’s a Thimble?”

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The FBI arrested a avowed South Carolina white supremacist who was trying to buy a gun from an undercover agent. The man said he wanted to carry out an attack “in the spirit of Dylan Roof.”
But hey, he’s white. So no terrorism problem. Move along, nothing to see here.

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As #Trump finds new media targets. remember old saying “If 1 person calls you an ass, ignore them, if 10 call you an ass, buy a saddle.”

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Trump says his administration is running “like a fine-tuned machine.” Uh, more like a Rube Goldberg machine . #TrumpNewsConference

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So was goal of #TrumpNewsConference to make @SNL give up because they can’t come up with satire stranger than reality?

#TrumpPressConference on Melania “She gets so unfairly maligned…” Guessing he hasn’t seen #FreeMelania movement?

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Trump – “We’re gonna find the leakers. They’re going to pay a big price for leaking.” But the stuff they were leaking, on Russia, etc – Move along, nothing to see here.

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Ret Vice Adm Bob Harward turned down Trump offer for National Security Advisor. CNN says he told friend it was “a “s*** sandwich,” #myhero

JudicialWatch estimated Obama’s travel expenses totaled $97 mill in 2 terms. Taking April 1 in pool for date Trump eclipses that.

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A just released nearly 400 page FBI file details an investigation on Trump and his father Fred allegedly “not wanting to rent to blacks” in the 1970s. So this couldn’t have been announced in October along with Weiner’s emails?

April Ryan, a longtime White House reporter and Washington bureau chief for American Urban Radio Networks, is African American. She asked Trump today if he planned to include the CBC (Congressional Black Caucus) “in your conversations with your urban agenda, your inner-city agenda.”
He responded by asking if they were “friends of yours,” &, “I tell you what, do you want to set up the meeting?”

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So if John Boehner was still around would Trump ask him to set up a meeting with the Orange Caucus? #TrumpPressConference

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Changing seasons.

February 6, 2017

Another reason baseball is the best sport. When the World Series game 7 was tied after regulation, both teams got a turn to bat.

 

SF 49ers fans should relax w/ Kyle Shanahan. Not like the 2017 team is going to have many 25 point leads to blow.

 

Clydesdales were originally bred in Scotland. Maybe that’s why there was no “aww” story this year. Budweiser was afraid they’d be accused of taking jobs away from real American horses.

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Wonder how many craft-beer liberals are buying Budweiser & Bud Light for the first time ever this week? #boycottbudweiser

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Tom Brady still can’t find his Super Bowl jersey. Anyone asked Putin?

 

Now the lieutenant governor of Texas has asked the Texas Rangers to join in Houston PD to help find Tom Brady’s missing Super Bowl jersey. How long until this gets blamed on a member of the liberal media?

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If  Tom Brady really is GOAT can we give an assist to Pete Carroll and Kyle Shanahan’s 4th quarter Super Bowl play calling?

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On a brighter note, some children in Africa this am can trade in their  Indians World Champions shirts for some shiny new Falcons ones.

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MLB is proposing to raise lower part of strike zone to the top of the hitter’s knees, from its current “the hollow beneath the kneecap.” Pitchers are thinking fine, if they actually start calling strikes above the waist.

 

We learned one thing this weekend. Sean Spicer can take a joke a lot better than his boss.

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George H.W. Bush got a standing ovation today before #SuperBowl. But heck, compared to the current White House occupant, George W. would get a standing ovation.

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A Jacksonville woman is being sought by police for performing oral sex on a man and posting it to social media. The alleged act took place at the county courthouse. Back on your game, Florida.

 

Americans have to be wishing  Trump was half as  focused on Serious issues facing this country as he is on the NY Times.

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In a 2004 book called “The Librarian,” by Larry Beinhart, author of “Wag the Dog,” there’s a right-wing conspiracy backing an ineffectual president. They try to create a terrorist act to keep him in power for a 2nd term. Scary book. Glad it’s only fiction….

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Rep. Matt Gaetz from Ft. Walton Beach, introduced a bill to dissolve the EPA. I trust Gaetz also feels it would be a waste of money for the Feds to spend any money the next time Florida has any oil spills or other environmental disasters.

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Obama – Christians did bad things “in the name of Christ.” GOP outrage. Trump-“You think our country’s so innocent.” GOP crickets #WTF?.

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Trump terrorism speech “All over Europe it’s happening. It’s gotten to point where it’s not even being reported. Like #BowlingGreenMassacre?

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Some of this stuff you just can’t make up. Melania Trump has a lawsuit against the UK Daily Mail for libel, and the paper has published a retraction of rumors that she worked as an escort. Okay, so far so good, and it’s understandable the First Lady would be upset.

BUT, her lawyer claims “plaintiff had the unique, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, as an extremely famous and well-known person … to launch a broad-based commercial brand in multiple product categories, each of which could have garnered multi-million dollar business relationships for a multi-year term during which plaintiff is one of the most photographed women in the world.”

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Degrees

January 30, 2017

That moment when you turn on sports talk radio for comparatively calm and reasonable conversation. #trumpweek1

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OKC’s Enes Kanter says he apologized to his teammates after breaking his arm by punching a chair during a game with Dallas last week. But did he apologize to the chair?

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On a lighter note, because we need some of those these days, Serena Williams is a damn good tennis player.

 

On another lighter note, who did the Clippers think they are tonight, the Lakers?

 

And he’s adorable too. So jealous.

 

Nikki Haley, saying that at the UN, we will “show our strength, show our voice, have the backs of our allies and make sure that our allies have our back as well, For those that don’t have our back, we’re taking names…”
Of course, the way things are going, the US could have a lot fewer allies to worry about.

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Yeah, there are some truly terrifying men in the world today. How long until some country decides to put in an American ban?   Or specifically orange Americans?

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Dr Gholam A. Peyman, born in Iran, US resident since 1970s, invented LASIK. Can we ban Trump supporters from having the surgery? #Muslimban

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A Thailand court sentenced man to 11 yrs in prison for posting material online judged “insulting” to monarchy. Scary. Hope Trump didn’t see it.

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Iran’s Asghar Farhadi is nominated for best foreign film, now may not be able to attend Oscars until he gets some sort of a waiver, fast.  Can Meryl Streep accept for him, with speech time?

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Trump has given Steve Bannon of Breitbart News a seat on the National Security Council. I’m ready for Bobby to come out of the shower now.

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Federal Judge Ann Donnelly temporarily blocked President Trump’s Executive Order on refugees with an emergency ruling that applies to detainees already in the United States, or those mid-flight. She said that sending the refugees home now could cause them “irreparable harm.”
Standby for Trump’s tweet calling for removing Donnelly from the bench in 3.2.1….

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Just wondering, what happens with flight attendants from the 7 banned countries? #malicewithoutaforethought

 

A rare serious thought  for a change. Ok, I understand that there are threats that many US civilians don’t understand and so there may be more reasons we don’t know behind Trump’s executive order about citizens of some Muslim countries.
On the other hand, when we live in difficult and nuanced times, what stands out to me is that this EO was dashed off with all the calm reasoned well-thought-out logic of a 3 am Twitter post.

 

 

 

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Could be greater?

January 25, 2017

Lebron James is not happy with the Cavs. “We’re not better than last year, from a personnel standpoint.” And last year Cleveland was so heartbreaking close….

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Following on our President’s lead the Chicago Cubs have asked for investigation to prove they also won 2016 World Series games 1, 3 & 4.

 

Tostitos has come up with “alcohol sensor bags.” While the bag won’t be sold to the public at least this year, they will light up green if you breathe on them and the sensor doesn’t detect alcohol. If it detects alcohol the bag will flash red with a “don’t drink and drive” message.
Cool idea, but if you’ve got to go looking for a Tostitos bag to decide if you’ve had too much to drink, you’re probably drunk.

(and if you finish the bag, alcohol might not be why  you’re impaired.)

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The San Diego bowl group announced they are terminating Poinsettia Bowl to focus on the Holiday Bowl. Hope this doesn’t bring colossal disappointment to some .500 team this year who will just miss the postseason.

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#BrentMusberger is retiring. Any way we can convince Brent to take Joe Buck with him?

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Sad.  Mary Tyler Moore, 80, has passed away.   In her honor, all women should embrace their inner spunk.  – “You’ve got spunk. I hate spunk.”

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In practice for Sunday’s Pro Bowl in Orlando Ravens kicker Justin Tucker hit a 75-yard field goal. Stay tuned for Sean Spicer to say tomorrow how President Trump made an 80-yard one in college intramurals.

 

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White House plans to take action to address governmental “inappropriate” social media use. Psst. Look in the Oval Office

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Trump vows no federal aid for sanctuary cities like NY & San Francisco. Does that mean we can stop paying federal taxes too?

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GOP Rep. Lamar Smith. “Better to get your news directly from the President. In fact,it might be the only way to get the unvarnished truth.”  #whythereisnosatire

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And here we go….President Donald Trump tweeted early today that he is ordering a “major investigation” into voter fraud. Like his major investigation into Obama’s birth certificate?

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This makes sense: U.S. intelligence says evidence of Russia hacking our election, so Trump going to investigate voters in blue states. #WTF?

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So can some journalist who wants to be next Woodward/Bernstein please find some evidence of illegal GOP voters?

 

Trump on his CIA speech: “I got a standing ovation. In fact, they said it was the biggest standing ovation since Peyton Manning had won the Super Bowl and they said it was equal.”
Guess the President doesn’t remember in 2016 Denver won the Super Bowl in SPITE of Peyton Manning.

 

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So now torture is a good thing. I forgot, what position did @realDonaldTrump appoint Jack Bauer to?

 

 

From T.C.  So I went to see the movie “Patriots Day” and discovered that it had nothing to do with football, Brady or Coach Belichick. Next on the agenda is to watch record 14 Oscars nominations film “La La Land”. This movie is about the state of Donald Trump’s brain, right?

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Now that the Women’s March is over, what’s next? Well, for starters hope everyone involved is registered to vote and plans to exercise that right. Beyond voting, it’s not too soon to start paying attention to candidates for the future. And while congressional and most state elections aren’t until 2018, there are many municipal and local elections in 2017, which matter too, a lot. City councils and school boards not only set local policy, but also they can be stepping stones for higher office.
In addition, contact your state and local elected officials when you feel strongly about something, They do keep track of numbers.
But short version, get involved and stay involved. The country you save may be your own.
And now back to your regularly scheduled snark.

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One America?

January 21, 2017

Not that America ever could unite easily on anything. But for a suggestion, could I suggest that after Trump’s inaugural that pitchers and catchers report early?

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But yes, it won’t be TOO long until the jokes about rich white privilege can at least temporarily be focused on the Yankees.

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I’m all for protests against our new @POTUS . But will these protesters remember to make as much of an effort for the 2020 election?

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Obama’s last phone call as President was apparently to thank Angela Merkel,. Yes, Germany is last bastion of liberalism #whythereisnosatire

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On a brighter note for moderates and liberals, Trump now has his own @realDonaldTrump AND @Potus twitter accounts. Maybe it will keep him busy enough to limit the damage?

 

 

So how many people woke up this morning with the hope of hearing at 12noon. “I was just kidding.”

 

Some complain that Trump’s speech was reminiscent of Batman villain Bane. How silly, it was much more Darth Vader.

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It was a great Inauguration speech for all those who hate waiting between Olympics for all those USA USA USA!! chants.

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“We are going to be protected by God”. Uh, if God was protecting us Trump probably wouldn’t be making this speech.

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“For too long a small group of people in Washington have reaped the rewards”. But now I’m going to make sure my rich friends get their share

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“Righteous people”. Code for “white men”.

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Hate idea of #PresidentTrump as much as anyone. But anyone idiotic enough to protest by destroying property is playing into his rhetoric.

 

#AmericaFirst would be lot more believable if it not spouted from lips of man whose 2 out of 3 wives have been immigrants. #Inauguration

 

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Yes, he’s comedy gold, but I’d have preferred to spend day struggling to think of a good inaugural ball pantsuit joke. #Inauguration

 

And now, the end is near, and so I face the final curtain… #InauguralBall

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“Identity politics” is tossed around like “snowflakes” as a derogatory term these days. But I would venture that most people who do the tossing are people who don’t feel justifiably threatened and scared by the new administration.

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From Marc Ragovin :” Wonderful inaugural speech by Trump. I hear the Russian judge gave it an 11.”

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Voting and other consequences

January 19, 2017

Russell Westbrook left off as a starter for the NBA All-Star team?!. Ah for the days when inexplicable voting by Americans just impacted meaningless exhibition games.

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Stanford has 11 players on rosters of the four teams left alive in this weekend’s NFL championship games.  The next closest school, Alabama, has 7.  #nerdnation

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Trump has appointed Woody Johnson as his ambassador to Great Britain. So Johnson will do for America’s reputation in England what he’s done for the Jets?

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Trump talking about huge crowds for inaugural concert .  Based on actual numbers even the Montreal Expos are giggling.

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El Chapo has been extradited over to US. So will Trump name him Drug Czar?

 

Now GOP has set precedent hope Senate Dems feel justified not voting on any potential Supreme Court nominee. Only 1383 days to next election.

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Trump doesn’t like PC, wonder why he didn’t ask the Stanford band to perform at inaugural – they could have played Yellow River.

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So when Trump takes oath of office will he be saying “So help me, me.”?

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Spokesman Sean Spicer says Trump’s incoming cabinet will have diversity. Yes, rich and richer.

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Rumors are that Trump plans to privatize the Corporation for Public Broadcasting. So will PBS be replaced by “Trump TV?”

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Rick Perry “After being briefed on so many of the vital functions of the Department of Energy, I regret recommending its elimination.”
Because, hey, don’t we all want to close things down when we have no idea what they do?

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Donald and Melania Trump arrived at their inaugural concert to the music of the Rolling Stones’ “Heart of Stone.” #Truthinadvertising

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Treasury secretary nominee Steven Mnuchin admitted in confirmation hearing today while he headed OneWest Bank, he now regrets kicking some people out of their homes. And one of the “”most troubling” of the foreclosures “was actually to the Octomom.”
At the Onion they are going, “that’s it, we quit. Can’t compete.”

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Trump in a speech tonight, “Next time, four years from now, next time we’re going to win the old fashioned way.” As in without Russian help or by getting the most votes?

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Nancy Sinatra, when asked how she felt about Trump using “My Way” for the first dance at his inaugural, responded, “Just remember the first line.” Three words “You go girl.”

(And now, the end is near, and so I face, the final curtain…..)

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And then there was #1

January 9, 2017

Only bad thing about Clemson’s amazing win is that somewhere Lane Kiffin is smirking.

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At the end, only thing that could have saved #Alabama & #NickSaban was the #Stanford band. #NationalChampionship

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The National Championship was close to 4 hours long with over  4 minutes left in 4th. Even Yankees and Red Sox were saying “guys, speed it up already.”

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Steelers assistant coach Joey Porter was arrested last night outside a Pittsburgh bar after allegedly assaulting the doorman. Porter is charged with aggravated assault, simple assault, resisting arrest, public drunkenness and disorderly conduct.
Wow.. Imagine what might have happened if Pittsburgh actually lost.

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On a brighter note for the #Raiders, their 13 point loss to the #Texans was the closest game of Wild Card weekend. @espn

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Tom Brady about the upcoming game with the Texans “There is nothing easy about this game for our offense.” He had the grace not to add “our defense, however, is salivating.”

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Early this morning @realDonaldTrump called #MerylStreep “over-rated.” So congratulations to all those who had “about 8 hours” in the pool.

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So if any country wants to launch attack on USA during Trump’s presidency, guess they just need the distraction of a celebrity insulting him.

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Marissa Mayer apparently will resign from Yahoo when the sale to Verizon is finalized. Will Mayer then run for office in California touting her business experience?

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John Kerry issued a formal State Department apology today for “decades of discrimination against LGBT employees and job applicants.”
Waiting for the House GOP rebuttal.

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Donald Trump has fired Charlie Brotman, 88, the Inaugural parade announcer for every President back to Eisenhower in 1957, and replaced him with a 58-year-old volunteer.
Anyone known one of those male cats who gets introduced to a new home and has to urinate in EVERY single corner to mark his territory?

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Trump hurting a lot of feelings w/ his inaugural parade. He fires 88-year-old announcer, then tells Chris Christie he can’t be a float.

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Trump’s now to officially name son-in-law Jared Kushner as a senior White House advisor per @NBCNews “#IfthePresidentdoesititisnotillegal

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An Emirates Air flight from from Muscat, Oman to Dubai was cancelled yesterday after baggage handlers found a loose snake on board. Wonder how they decided the snake was loose – if it was female maybe it wasn’t wearing a hijab?.

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Trump met today with the chair of Alibaba. The Chinese company was placed back last month on a list of counterfeit marketplaces by the United States Trade Representative over selling fake and pirated goods. But maybe Trump isn’t worried, figuring no one would want to make knock-off Trump branded merchandise.

 

Monica Crowley, Trump’s choice for director of communications for the National Security Council, was recently accused of many instances of plagiarism in her 2012 book, and in a 1999 Wall Street Journal article. Now Politico says they have found several more instances of plagiarism in her dissertation.
Maybe Crowley doesn’t want to the NSC job, but rather to be Melania’s speechwriter.

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Kellyanne Conway complained today about Democrats calling for an independent bipartisan commission to investigate election allegations about Russa. “It’s curious and a little bit humorous that Democrats would talk about anything bipartisan … given how they have vowed to obstruct everything we do.”
Just wondering, where was Kellyanne’s outrage when Mitch McConnell in January 2009 vowed to make Obama a one-term president?

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The convicted Charleston mass murderer (yes, I am deliberately not using his name), asked the judge in his death penalty trial not to allow the prosecution to use words like “evil.”
Uh, actually while the word is overused, seems like this is one of those times “evil” is completely appropriate.

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Clowning around

January 4, 2017

 

Someone changed name of #Browns training facility on Google Maps to “Cleveland Clowns.” Prompting demands for an apology, from real clowns

 

But okay friends and readers, since someone went on Google Maps to put the name “Cleveland Clowns” on the Browns training facility, surely bright minds in California can come up with a equally creative map “fix” for the San Francisco 49ers corporate offices.

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In a Thai National Park a French tourist who spotted a crocodile reportedly ignored warning signs and went off the trail to take a selfie with it. She is recovering in a local hospital with a leg bite. Another Darwin “missed it by THAT much.”

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Last Sunday, a baggage handler for United Express ended up flying from Charlotte to Washington-Dulles accidentally locked inside the plane’s cargo hold,
Well, guess we know the answer to the question -what’s the next low fare option for United after “basic economy” fares?

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Brent Musberger last night on Joe Mixon, who was seen on video hitting a woman and fracturing her face “He’s just one of the best, and let’s hope, given a second chance by Bob Stoops and Oklahoma, let’s hope this young man makes the most of his chance and goes on to have a career in the National Football League,”

Actually makes you long for the days when Brent was just ogling the Alabama QB’s girlfriend..

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ESPN reports that a 32-year-old Starbucks barista won more than $900,000 in the Westgate Las Vegas SuperContest, the world’s most prestigious football handicapping contest.
Shouldn’t that report say “a FORMER Starbucks barista?”

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Starbucks barista won over $900,000 in Westgate Las Vegas football handicapping SuperContest. Now he can at least afford his own coffee.

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Last week McDonald’s opened a new location on the ground floor of a building owned by the Vatican, around the corner from St. Peters. Perfect for those who want to cheat on their diets and confess at the same time?

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In Roane County, WV, a man who was just elected sheriff in November was arrested on his 3rd day on the job, allegedly for stealing meth from the evidence locker. West Virginia?! Time to catch up, Florida.

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Three months after the robbery in Paris, Kim Kardashian West has officially returned to social media with a post on Instagram #Ourlongnationalnightmareisover #sarcasm

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Megyn Kelly announced she is leaving Fox News. So congrats to all those who had January 3 in the pool.

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House Republicans this morning dropped their plan from last night to gut the Office of Congressional Ethics. Who’s in on the pool with me as to when they reintroduce it?

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The National Enquirer headline in checkout aisle touts “proof” that Obama was born in Kenya, and says “Trump already bringing dignity back to the White House.”
Standby for Trump tweeting that the Enquirer should be the US paper of record.

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Julian Assange denied again that the Russian government was the source of Wikileaks’ hacked emails from the DNC and John Podesta. And why should we doubt the man who denounced censorship on the Kremlin’s “Russia Today” channel?

 

from Bill Littlejohn: “The Golf Channel honored Tiger Woods on his birthday Friday by airing a 15-hour marathon that chronicled his major championship highlights from the 1997 Masters to the 2008 U.S. Open, plus features on his life. In that case, shouldn’t there have been a couple of episodes from ‘Law and Order SVU’ thrown in?” . . .

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Numbers game.

December 14, 2016

Gregg Popovich has 1,109 career wins in the regular season. 1,001 of them were with Tim Duncan.

 

Despite announcing the wrong winner last year, Steve Harvey has been invited back to host the next Miss Universe pageant. Forgiveness? Or FOX figuring that viewers hoping for another flub will give them all-time high ratings?

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Jim Brown is a legend but wonder why Donald Trump met with Ray Lewis. Hope it wasn’t for advice on how to get away with murder?

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Lions CB Darius Slay, on the Pro Bowl being in Orlando instead of Hawaii “It’s really pointless.” Uh, has the Pro Bowl ever been anything but?

(Idea, what if being picked as a Pro Bowler just gets you two free tickets to Hawaii. Save the wear and tear and potential injuries Of course this would disappoint at least a dozen fans.).

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WR Michael Floyd was arrested for DUI and failure to obey a police officer after he was found allegedly passed out in his running car early Monday morning on a Scottsdale street. Today the Cardinals released him. When will they ever learn – if you want to stay on a team and get arrested, you’d better be a superstar.

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Lane Kiffin already has his first controversy as coach of FAU, by signing East Mississippi Community College QB De’Andre Johnson. Johnson was a top prospect who was dismissed from Florida State he was seen on video in a bar punching a woman.
So congratulations to all those who had December 14 in the pool

 

At San Francisco Intl Airport (SFO), a traffic management program is in effect, causing some arriving flights to be delayed an average of over 2 hours. Or as frequent fliers in and out of SFO call it “Wednesday.”

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Reports are that at least 300 employees of Google and Twitter and other tech companies have signed a pledge to refuse to help Trump build a Muslim registry. Of course there’s another way out of this, have Yahoo or AOL volunteer to build the registry; then it just won’t work.

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Conagra Brands, the company that makes Reddi-wip, said they may have a shortage this Christmas due to a fatal explosion at a Florida nitrous oxide plant this summer. The horror. This could mean not only no aerosol whipped cream this holiday, but no dregs of nitrous oxide in the can to help survive your relatives.

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Good to see #Trump taking time between insults, celebrity pics & thank yous to tweet about tragedy that is #Aleppo. Oh, wait, never mind.

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Trump is considering Carly Fiorina as Director of National Intelligence. Because after the report of Russian hacking Donald might want Carly to do to Intelligence employees what she did to those at HP?

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Carly Fiorina in the debate after Donald Trump insulted her face. “I think women all over this country heard very clearly what Mr. Trump said.” Yeah, and it sounds like in the end Carly herself paid about as much attention to what he said as many women.

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After meeting with Trump, #Kanye tweeted today #2024. Isn’t it a little premature to think of taking on President #CoryBooker?

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BP announced it is moving headquarters from Houston to Denver. This following Exxon-Mobil moving its headquarters to the White House?

 

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from Marc Ragovin “The NY Yankees have signed Reuben Tejeda to a minor league contract. He reportedly is head over heels with the move.”

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Leaving the lights on.

November 28, 2016

So this year it’s the “Motel 6 Cactus Bowl,” on Dec. 27 in Phoenix. Do the winners all get a free night at a Motel 6, and the losers get two nights?

 

The Big Ten reprimanded Jim Harbaugh and fined Michigan $10,000 after Harbaugh complained bitterly about the officiating Saturday. A small excerpt “Two penalties called all day [on Ohio State “Multiple holding penalties let go, multiple false starts…”
So wonder if Wolverine backers already have a Gofundme account set up to pay the fines?

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Ohio State could make the College Football Playoff without winning their own division.   Would that make them an honorary member of the SEC?

 

A United flight from San Francisco to Tokyo had to return to the airport today following an engine failure after takeoff. No word about potential compensation for passengers, or about a future “engine” fee.

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Hoping the attacker ends up  the only fatality on OSU campus today. But my immediate bus-to-hell thought “Dudes, you won the game.”

That and “anyone seen Harbaugh this morning?.” #morebustohell

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Trump supporter NY Rep. Chris Collins today “”What do I know about Mitt Romney? I know that he’s a self-serving egomaniac who puts himself first, who has a chip on his shoulder, and thinks that he should be president of the United States.”
Does this even need a punchline?

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Trump is threatening to “terminate” deal that Obama made with Cuba. Does he realize even his supporters like cigars and rum?

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Apparently Twitter users are going after Ivanka Trump after she posted a picture of her youngest child, with the caption “I cannot believe Theodore is 8 months old today. Happy Birthday Little Teddy Bear.”
But come on, we all know the Trumps are so special they get birthdays every month. #onlythelittlepeoplejustgetonebirthday

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The NY Times reports that Steve Bannon talked to Julia Jones, a former partner on a Reagan film project, about “genetic superiority,” and “the desirability of limiting the vote to property owners.”
Ah yes, building that bridge to the 18th century

 

Trump is naming Georgia Rep. and Obamacare critic Tom Price as Secretary of Health and Human Services. Price tweeted “House Republicans’ #BetterWay plan will protect the principles of health care: Accessibility, Affordability, Quality, Innovation, & Choices.”.
Okay, fine, but how come all these GOP critics never thought health care needed reforming until Dems actually passed the ACA?

 

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Got to love this one forwarded to me by Roberta.

@stats_canada

In addition to winning the 1967 Stanley Cup, the Maple Leafs won all subsequent Cups if you deduct the dozens of teams who won illegally

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Amateur hour.

November 23, 2016

 

The SF 49ers, embroiled in a financial battle over stadium management with Santa Clara, have now slammed the city’s “‘disturbing trend of frivolous actions”
Uh, doesn’t “disturbing trend of frivolous actions” basically sum up the 49ers’ recent coaching decisions and draft picks?

 

 

Jill Stein is raising money for a recount in MI, WI & PA. Of course if Stein had really cared about the election she could have just not run.

 

RIP #Ralphbranca. So somewhere in heaven is #BobbyThomson smiling while he takes batting practice? #Dodgers #Giants

 

San Antonio @Spurs won again by 5, tonight against Hornets. Will #Popovich just send out a video of last night’s rant and say “ditto?”

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Wendell Carter, a power forward considered the top uncommitted recruit for 2017, says he is going to Duke. These are tough decisions for these young men, deciding where to spend several months of their lives.

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At this point aren’t all the warnings about the Samsung One Note 7 smart phones just a suggestion for potential terrorists on how to catch a plane on fire?

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Trump has decided “the law’s totally on my side, the president can’t have a conflict of interest.” So while the Donald accused Hillary Clinton of “pay-to-play” with her foundation, he’s going to take care of things by getting richer and richer while IN the White House.

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In California, as of today an estimated 1,797,333 unprocessed ballots remained in California from the Nov. 8 election. Wow. If only we had some creative high-tech talent in the state to work on a faster solution.

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Carnival pulling the plug on their new “Fathom” volunteer-work oriented cruise line, which was designed for an “under-served market of consumers who want to have a positive impact on people’s lives”
Turns out the positive impact most cruise passengers really want on vacation is more about tipping waiters who bring them beer and umbrella drinks

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Well, to be fair #BenCarson is probably as qualified to be Secretary of HUD as Donald Trump is to be President of the United States.

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In March, Donald Trump tweeted “The people of South Carolina are embarrassed by Nikki Haley!” Today he appointed Haley Ambassador to the UN. Does this mean the Donald has changed his mind. Or is he showing us what he thinks of the UN?

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#BetsyDeVos for Education secretary. Guess it makes #Trump sense, put someone in charge who doesn’t believe in public schools….

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The NEA teacher’s union estimates that 1/3 of their members voted for Trump. And now the Donald has put a voucher advocate who hates public schools as head of the Dept. of Education.
Mean bitch karma is clearly bipartisan.

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Worst and worstest?

November 21, 2016

The NFL played a game tonight in Mexico City. And Mexico is thinking “Wait, Trump is accusing US of sending criminals across the border?”

 

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SF 49ers coach Chip Kelly, asked if he received any assurance from Jed York on his job next year. “No, we haven’t had any conversations about that at all. About anybody’s job security.”
Of course, in Kelly’s favor, who else might want to take on this mess?

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U.S. Soccer just fired national team manager Jurgen Klinsmann. So congrats to all those who had Nov. 21 in the pool.

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The Washington Redskins keep on winning. I blame Obama.

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But is it just me or does the @NFL have a LOT of lousy football teams?

 

At Chicago’s O’Hare airport, hundreds of workers have announced a strike for Nov 29. They are waiting until Tuesday theoretically to miss the holiday weekend.
But okay, two days after Thanksgiving weekend? Should be lots of people still stuck at O’Hare.

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LB Jerrell Freeman today became the second Chicago player suspended in a week for violating the NFL’s policy on PEDs.
The Bears are 2-8. Maybe this should be a warning to others, not only will PEDs get you suspended, they apparently don’t work.

 

Though easy material keeps on coming, I was really looking forward to tough task post-election of writing pantsuits jokes.

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Imagine if Michelle Obama decided to stay in Chicago not to move girls from school in 2009. Would have been uproar on wasting taxpayer $$$.

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So just guessing Green Day is not performing at Trump’s inaugural.

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Mark the date, November 20, 2016.  Donald Trump tweeted  “I have always had a good relationship with Chuck Schumer. He is far smarter than Harry R and has the ability to get things done. Good news!”

So shall we start a pool on the date Trump decides Schumer is an idiot and/or crooked?

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If Donald Trump really wants to keep illegal immigrants from getting jobs he doesn’t need a wall; just make it felony resulting in jail-time to hire them.

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From Bill Littlejohn:  ““President Obama inviting the Chicago Cubs to the White House before he leaves office reminds one of a similar situation the last time the Cubs won the World Series, Pharaoh invited the Cubs for a visit just before the Ten Plagues of Egypt.”

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Costa rica?

November 15, 2016

 

Ok, regarding this #MakeAmericaGreat again stuff. Did @realDonaldTrump not realize we have a men’s soccer team?

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Don’t look now, but the Lakers are respectable again. So is it Luke Walton coaching or Kobe Bryant leaving?

 

ESPN headline  “The CFP race is setting up for an unpredictable and likely controversial finish.”  In other words, water is wet.

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Lots of Big 10 teams in the top rankings now.   Add another  conference where teams can beat up on each other but still rank higher than Pac 12 teams who do the same thing.

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Columbia University has at least temporarily stopped its mens’ wrestling team from competing during an investigation of “lewd tweets.”
Once again, bad enough to make the comments, criminal stupidity to put them on the record in tweets. Even Ivy Leagues apparently #cantfixstupid

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Apparently 49ers QB Colin Kaepernick, 29, has NEVER registered to vote. And he thinks Hillary Clinton is an imperfect leader….

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For election should we really blame #AlGore? If he hadn’t invented internet Hillary’s emails & Trump on Twitter wouldn’t have happened.

 

Maybe we shouldn’t be surprised that a America who thinks you can find true love on reality show also thinks you can find president on one.

 

Democrats need to remember, it’s as important to keep fighting forward when we’re winning as to fight back when we lose.

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Wait, I can’t just fire everyone in Congress I don’t like? #PresidentTrumps1stTantrum

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Has anyone thought that maybe putting #SteveBannon in the White House is to make #Trump look statesmanlike by comparison?

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So has anyone told Rudy Giuliani that if he becomes Secretary of State he can’t count on FBI friends to bail him out?

 

New sore winner prize to @RealDonaldTrump: if no electoral college “I’d have campaigned in N.Y. FL & CA, & won even bigger & more easily”

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Twitter says it is cracking down on hate speech. Just in time to keep deranged Tweeters from affecting the US election. Oh wait, never mind.

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USA doesn’t have “Leader of the Opposition” like UK does, but Democrats need one now to inspire w/ positive message. I nominate @CoryBooker

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Drained?

November 11, 2016

So about when will Donald Trump realize that it is now HIS alligators and his swamp?

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Have to think George W. Bush is smiling just a bit. Decent chance many will no longer think he’s worst US President In recent memory

 

Melania Trump and Michelle Obama apparently had a nice meeting in the White House today. Assume Melania asked Michelle for names of her favorite florist, chef, restaurants, speechwriter….

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If #Trump is really going to start deporting immigrants how will Melania get her nails done?

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Well, at least Thursday night Americans could take a break & have the biggest thing that sucks on TV be the #Browns. #CLEvsBAL

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And early in the game, the Browns were actually ahead.  Until they reverted to form.  There alas went the 49ers best chance at a #1 draft pick.

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NY Giants WR Victor Cruz, asked about Donald Trump post-election “My mom told me one time that if I don’t have anything nice to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. So I’m gonna stick to that one.”
#notsodumbjock

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Alabama football coach Nick Saban claimed today he had no idea there was a Presidential election Tuesday. “We’re focused on other things here”. Sigh. Pretty sure those other things don’t include education.

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Your non-election Florida item for the afternoon: According to police affidavits, FIU senior TE Jonnu Smith’s girlfriend was upset about him not paying enough attention to her, so she poured boiling water on him. Smith is now out for the season with multiple burns. Oh, and she’s pregnant with their child. And you thought YOUR parents were embarrassing.

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Rudy Giuliani on plans to “lock her up” with Hillary Clinton “I think that somebody should review that very carefully, as to how bad is that evidence. And if it isn’t as bad as some of the exaggerators think it is, then maybe the best thing to do is forget about it and move on.”
“Some of the exaggerators?” And Rudy said it with a straight face.

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The Obamacare federal exchange had more than 100,000 signups yesterday, their largest day of the year. Lovely, so the threat of fines doesn’t spur people to action, but the threat of a Trump presidency does.

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Waiting to see Trump announce simple new health plan that is much cheaper than Obamacare – “You get well without a doctor or you die”

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So far Donald Trump’s transition team is heavy on Heritage Foundation types, K street lobbyists and GOP insiders. So was “drain the swamp” simply to get easier access to some of the bottom feeders there?

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Going to be interesting to see if Donald Trump has any women in his administration. One problem, leaving misogyny aside, is any woman attractive enough to be “his first choice” might well not want to get within groping distance.

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Wondering with all these ambitious legislative plans if #GOP has forgotten about that little 60 vote rule in Senate they loved so much.

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Someone gave the Donald his Twitter account back    “Just had a very open and successful presidential election. Now professional protesters, incited by the media, are protesting. Very unfair!”

Such a gracious winner.

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Apparently some anti-Trump protests are blocking traffic in the SF Bay Area. (Interstate 80). While I’m as upset about this election as anyone, making people late for work, childcare pickup, etc, etc, is a really good way to turn off anyone even a little bit moderate.

 

 

Many of these Trump protesters are young, some too young to vote. (Although I sure hope those who could, did.) But thinking about it, I can understand how this election hit the younger generation especially hard.
They have grown up with concepts we middle-aged and old farts never did: global warming, the idea of racial equality, anti-bullying and sexual assault messages, openly LGBT friends, taco trucks on the corner…. And with a soft-spoken African-American president.
It’s not just that we’ve elected a Republican, it’s that we’ve elected a man who at times has gone against all these people and things, and more. That is very very scary.

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Same time next century?

November 2, 2016

So expecting the @Cubs to repeat in 2124?

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After tonight I am really going to miss baseball. But I am NOT going to miss Joe  Buck.

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Clearly the worst position in sports to be in is to have a 3-1 series lead? #Cubs #Indians #Warriors #Cavs

 

Well that was fun, so what time is game 8? #WorldSeries

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So many ex-A’s making a difference in #WorldSeries maybe @Athletics should get a playoff share.

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#DavidRoss becomes only man in @MLB history to hit home runs off both #AndrewMiller & #MarkGrace #WorldSeries

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Try explaining this game to someone who’s never paid attention to baseball before? #WorldSeries @Cubs @Indians

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And even to serious baseball fans, what  is this sport being played by pitchers who can’t go 6 innings?

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Time to just cancel school in #Chicago & #Cleveland tomorrow already? #WorldSeries #Game7 @Cubs @Indians

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We interrupt warm fuzzy World Series feelings to remind everyone about the Cubs’ owners, the Ricketts famiiy. They launched “Future45,” a conservative PAC who want the 45th President to be a Republican. They spent big against Bernie, and are now spending many  millions in pro-Trump attack ads against Hillary Clinton.

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Today is #NationalStressAwarenessDay How could have I forgotten that?

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#AnthonyWeiner mess is disgusting enough to make Democrats long for good old days when our most problematic douchebag was #JohnEdwards.

 

Awful morning news to hear two policemen ambushed and fatally shot in Iowa. Waiting for Trump to angrily tweet about the news for his campaign. Oh, wait, American-born white male suspect with a Confederate flag Never mind.

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#PaulRyan campaigns across the country for #GOP like he’s playing Password, and #Trump is the secret word he can’t say.

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Trump tweet today about how he is “going to repeal and replace ObamaCare. We will have MUCH less expensive and MUCH better healthcare.”
Of course Trump won’t tell us how he’s going to do this. Like everything else it’s a secret….

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So some GOP congressmen are now worried about a potential impeachment crisis with Hillary Clinton over emails. Haven’t they been planning already to come up with some impeachment reason on Nov 9? When they could find time between votes repealing Obama.

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In North Texas, someone blocked an official polling place sign with a Trump sign, and glued razor blades into the bottom of the placard. A poll worker sustained minor cuts while removing it. #Stayclassy

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Happy Day of the Dead.

November 1, 2016

Or as they call it in the U.S.  – “National half-price candy day.”

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You think you have a hard week at work, imagine all the teachers who have to deal with kids crashing off a sugar high that started Monday night.

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Election has really ruined #Halloween horror movies this year. No way to make fiction scarier than reality.

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Interesting to see some people rooting against the Cleveland Indians because of their Chief Wahoo mascot. But many of those people have no problem with the Chicago Cubs despite their star closer being suspended 30 games for domestic violence. #Priorities

 

Tim Tebow, who is hitting 147 in the Arizona Fall League, apparently slightly injured his right knee trying to steal second base. Shocking many sports fans that he ever got to first base.

 

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New England LB Jamie Collins will have his 4-year rookie contract expire at season’s end, and he was asking for big money. Today the Patriots traded Collins to the Browns. Talk about deflating.

 

Good news for #Bears fans, their team won on #MNF. Bad news for #Bears fans, now for a while they might be stuck with #JayCutler

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In China, a 20-year-old man climbed into a giant panda enclosure to impress two women he was with. While the panda grabbed the guy, and head-butted him, the idiot escaped with only “his pants torn to shreds.” One of those moments you really wish pandas were carnivores.

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A new poll found that while 46% of Americans view Hillary Clinton favorably and 47% unfavorably. those who prefer Fox News split 13% favorably, 84% unfavorably. In related news, the poll found that water is wet.

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Trump campaign manager Kellyanne Conway said today “we don’t plan on making the Comey investigation the main centerpiece of our messaging.” Sounds like Conway pays about as much to what the Donald actually says as Mike Pence does.

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John #Kasich says he wrote in #JohnMcCain‘s name on Presidential ballot. How long until #Trump announces plan to build a wall around Ohio?

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And finally,  while we’re on the subject of emails, there’s this letter from Harry Reid to James Comey: “In my communication with you and other top officials in the national security community, it has become clear that you possess explosive information about close ties and coordination between Donald Trump, his top advisers, and the Russian government – a foreign interest openly hostile to the United States, which Trump praises at every opportunity.
‘The public has a right to know this information. I wrote to you months ago calling for this information to be released to the public. There is no danger to American interests from releasing it. ”

This all would be a lot more fun if it weren’t real.

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Nobody’s perfect.

October 28, 2016

Jon Stewart, when he quit “The Daily Show” in 2015. “I’d covered an election four times, and it didn’t appear that there was going to be anything wildly different about this one.”

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Another reason baseball is the BEST sport. In a 1-0 game you can’t just play keep-away & try to run out clock. #WorldSeries #Indians #Cubs

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The World Series reminds us again that #As really are a farm system for the rest of MLB. #Crisp #Zobrist #Lester #Russell #Davis #Otero

While the SF Giants are not in the World Series, Giants fans had to like to hear ESPN’s play-by-play announcer Dan Shulman on Indians pitcher Tomlin “”he can handle bat though he’s no Bumgarner.”

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The U.K. Telegraph finally posted an interview with Bob Dylan saying he “absolutely” wants to attend the Nobel Prize Ceremony “if it’s at all possible.”
Actually, Dylan probably gave the interview on the day he won the award, it’s just taken them this long to translate it.

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A recent Chapman University poll showed that 32% of Americans are afraid of climate change, while 42% are afraid of clowns. #BeamMeUpScottieThereIsNoIntelligentLifeOnThisPlanet

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In a debate with Tammy Duckworth, who is a Purple Heart winner from the Iraq War and double amputee, Sen. Mark Kirk made a jab at her mother’s being from Thailand. Among those who have criticized him, KellyAnne Conway. Thereby answering a question “How low do you have to go to be called out by the Trump campaign?”.

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Today is #NationalChocolateDay. And women are going “Isn’t EVERY day ‘National Chocolate Day?'”

 

Pac 12 Commissioner Larry Scott, answering a reporter’s question about a TV contract that has Cal playing back-to-back weeknight games during a tough academic period. “That hasn’t been a parameter, academic schedules per se, so it hasn’t come up… Well of course not, the idea of big conference television contracts started with the SEC. #whatacademicschedules?

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An American Airlines flight at O’Hare caught fire when a tire apparently blew on takeoff. Expect flight delays. And for United Airlines to immediately institute a tire maintenance fee.

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“New” Clinton emails may be from #AnthonyWeiner. Will #FBI agents reading them get hardship pay for needing to take so many showers?

 

No doubt Hillary Clinton is furious over the alleged Anthony Weiner messages being used to reopen her FBI email investigation. On the other hand, she has to be very thankful sexting wasn’t an option during Bill’s time in the White House.

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Rumor today that if Hillary Clinton wins she would like to name Biden as Secretary of State. Wonder if this means Joe, who would be 81,  wants to run for President in 2024?

 

From T.C.  “Tickets for this weekend’s games at Wrigley will average $5,000 ea. Of course, this includes Steve Bartman’s ticket. The Cubs gave him $10,000 to go watch the game at a bar in Miami.”

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On and on…

October 26, 2016

4 hours & 4 minutes for 5-1 Chicago win. Good thing Cubs have plenty of fans because these first two World Series games  would not convert many to MLB

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Blowout baseball games are really only fun to watch if you’re a fan of the team doing the blowing-out. Another reason Fox might consider showing more regular season games to create national rather than regional interest….

 

Just one game and one win, but tonight did Lakers get a taste of what it might have been like to have Kobe Bryant retire sooner?

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Yoenis Cespedes has opted out of his #Mets contract and plans to test free agent market. Because 4 teams in 6 years wasn’t enough?

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Looking at all these bundled-up players in 40 degree temperatures during the World Series makes me nostalgic for Candlestick Park.

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A police report on the crash that took the life of Marlins pitcher Jose Fernandez found “a strong odor of alcohol” and evidence that whoever was driving the boat was speeding and driving with “recklessness” that was “exacerbated by the consumption of alcohol.”
Sad, really sad. But “I am shocked, said nobody.”

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American is going to be the next major U.S. airline to start selling “Basic” economy fares – no changes, standby, seat assignments, etc. So how low can they go – the option to fly as cargo?.

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Newt Gingrich tweeted today “‘For the record Megyn Kelly is wrong, I don’t have anger management issues. I do have media bias issues!” Wonder if he was shouting while he wrote it.

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Story out of Australia is that two beautiful young women who were contestants on the “The Bachelor” did indeed find love. With each other. Hmm, if this becomes a thing might increase U.S. men’s viewership.

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All of this “repeal and replace” about Obamacare that the GOP is spouting. Of course what they don’t spout is that they want to replace it with nothing.

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Trump says he’s going to spend over $100 million on his campaign before election day. Has someone told him he can’t take this loss off his taxes?

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Trump today “I will never, ever take the African-American community for granted — unlike Hillary.”‘
Okay but while the Donald castigates Hillary for what she didn’t do in the Senate, why, with all his decades-old business empire can Trump not name a thing he has done as far as minority hiring and other outreach?

 

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Donald Trump said last week that “I will reverse Obama’s executive orders & concessions towards Cuba.” Meaning besides travel that Cuban rum & cigars will become illegal again. Forget sexual assault, racism, healthcare etc, this might be the “trump” card for Hillary to woo white men.

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From Alex Kaseberg  “A youth football team was kicked out of its league in Rhode Island when they snuck a grown man into their lineup. Man, Johnny Manziel cannot catch a break.”

Folks I suppose became suspicious when the team beat the Browns.

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From Paul Lander.  Indeed, the gift that keeps on giving:   “Happy 69th Birthday, @HillaryClinton. Don’t forget to send the Republican Party a thank you for the gift of nominating Trump.”

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