Posted tagged ‘Janice Hough’
April 20, 2015
Apparently in Kansas City some fans are complaining because the hot dogs on “$1 Hot Dog Night” were not exactly top quality. These are probably the same folks who complain about day-old sushi.
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Kraft Foods says they are getting rid of artificial preservatives and synthetic colors in their “Original Macaroni and Cheese” starting in January 2016. Have to wonder, without the day-glo orange color, how many kids will stop eating the stuff?
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Tim Tebow has formally signed a one-year deal with the Philadelphia Eagles. Let’s hope Tim didn’t take that “City of Brotherly Love” nickname too seriously.
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Pelicans coach Monty Williams said that the Warriors crowd noise during game one was “a little out of hand.” Did he think Golden State fans would hear this and be quieter tonight. #cantfixstupid
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The #1 NFL player as far as merchandise sales last year was Seahawks QB Russell Wilson. Wonder how many fans bought stuff to pass on?
(My friend Arne says “there was a run on his jerseys…”)
Chris Christie is against legalized marijuana and says “we have an enormous addiction problem in this country.” So is the New Jersey Governor proposing the equivalent of lap-bands for pot smokers?
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In Parma, Missouri, five out of a total of six cops resigned after the town elected a black woman mayor. So if Hillary gets elected will they turn in their citizenship?
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Former N.J. Gov and CEO of bankrupt MF Global Jon Corzine is apparently considering starting his own hedge fund. Will the firm’s logo be a fox guarding a hen coop?
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President Obama and his family took an unscheduled hike in Virginia’s Great Falls Park yesterday. Let’s see, no golf included, no Air Force One or helicopter needed…. maybe critics will go after him for bringing too much attention to the park and thus contributing to future overcrowding? #cantwin
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SF 49ers right guard Alex Boone apparently told HBO’s “Real Sports” about former coach Jim Harbaugh ” “This guy might be clinically insane.” Just wondering, what percentage of NFL coaches does Boone think aren’t?
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A recent CNN-ORC shows no clear favorite for the Republican presidential nomination. Though since the primaries are about a year away have to wonder how many Americans could name the options. #toomanyridersintheclowncar
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The SF Chronicle reports that Cal wide receivers coach and recruiting coordinator Pierre Ingram was arrested last week during a prostitution sting for allegedly soliciting an officer. Yet another ill-advised and incomplete pass for the Bears?
Jon Stewart announced that his final episode of “The Daily Show” will be August 6. Wonder how many prospective Presidential candidates have now decided to announce they are running on August 7.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Chris Christie jokes, food jokes, hot dog jokes, Janice Hough, Jon Stewart jokes, NBA jokes, New Jersey jokes, NFL jokes, Tebow jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 20, 2015
Say what? The NY Post reports that NYC Mayor Bill De Blasio’s hopes that a “draft de Blasio’’ movement will result in his beating Hillary in the primaries like “George McGovern successfully challenged the initially front-running establishment candidate, Edmund Muskie, more than 40 years ago” And we all know how well that worked out for the Democrats.
Today is 4-20. Let’s hope protesters in favor of marijuana legalization remember to show up before 4-21.
Jon Stewart told the UK Guardian that he is leaving The Daily Show because he was becoming increasing depressed by US politics and cable news. Which alas is how many Americans feel about coping with current events without him.
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Both the Oakland and Kansas City benches emptied for the third straight day during today’s game and five Royals were ejected after Kelvin Herrera threw a 100 mph fastball behind Brett Lawrie. Almost a shame the two teams don’t meet again until late June. – some say baseball doesn’t get high TV ratings because it’s not a contact sport.
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Tim Tebow is joining the Philadelphia Eagles. Meaning it will be a close competition between him, Matt Barkley and Mark Sanchez for the QB most likely to have Philly fans scream “Jesus Christ.”
Marco Rubio today “I also don’t believe that your sexual preferences are a choice for the vast and enormous majority of people. In fact, the bottom line is I believe sexual preference is something that people are born with.”
Is the Florida Senator saying he has conceded the bat sh*t crazy vote?
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Donald Trump apparently retweeted (then deleted) a tweet saying “If Hillary Clinton can’t satisfy her husband, what makes her think she can satisfy America. Thinking if Donald Trump can’t make TWO marriages work what makes him think he can deal with tough international relations.
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A new book says that Ronald Reagan believed in extra-terrestrial life and in 1985 told Mikhail Gorbachev at a peace summit that “he was sure the two superpowers would co-operate if Earth was threatened by alien invasion.” Don’t laugh too fast… alien invasion might explain some of the candidates we have running for President.
(My friend Suzanne G. says I have now disrespected aliens.)
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A British study found that drivers who were dehydrated (drinking 25 ml -less than an ounce of water) an hour, made as many mistakes as drivers who were over the DUI limit. Of course, imagine that drivers who drink a LOT of water are more likely to speed to get to a restroom.
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Texas Rangers GM Jon Daniels says he’d like to give Russell Wilson a shot but . “Obviously, he’s got a pretty good thing going on with the Seahawks, and we’re not going to get in the way of that.” Translation, Wilson’s a decent baseball player but he’s not THAT good.
(Alex B. says “Wilson was going to give baseball a go, but Pete Carroll told him to pass.”
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Apparently the Lily Pulitzer collection for Target caused a shopping frenzy Sunday morning online and at Target stores. And if you have any idea what that means you probably don’t have a Y chromosome.
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Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes
Tags: 2016 Presidental election jokes, 4 20 jokes, De Blasio jokes, Janice Hough, Jon Stewart jokes, marijuana jokes, Rubio joke, Tebow jokes, Trump jokes
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April 18, 2015
And of course two weeks into the season didn’t we all have the #SFGiants ace being #ChrisHeston?
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Is it too soon to nominate #ChrisHeston as NL Rookie of the Year? #SFGiants
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The SF Giants have placed pitcher Jake Peavy on the DL for a back strain. Wonder if Peavy strained it by turning around so often to watch where balls hit off him were going.
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Last night Pablo Sandoval “barreled” (ESPN’s word) into Baltimore 2B Jonathan Schoop trying to break up a double play. Today the O’s put Schoop on the DL with a partially torn PCL and, sprained MCL.
Panda isn’t making himself too popular with any fans wearing Orange and Black.
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Pete Rose has been hired as a guest studio analyst for Fox. No word on how much the network is paying him. Or on how much Rose made for betting someone would offer him a baseball-oriented job.
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As if we needed proof that in some parts of the US, the state bird is the football: Ohio State drew over 99,000 fans today. For a Spring intra-squad scrimmage game.
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Many celebrities today at various Earth Day rallies. Wonder how many arrived on private planes?
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Carly Fiorina is the latest “maybe” entrant in the 2016 race. “I will probably be running for president in a few short weeks.” All these indecisive people…. are they waiting to see if they can hire as a campaign manager Brett Favre?
Fiorina also says that if she gets in the race, she can block Hillary Clinton from playing the “gender card.” Alas, with her record at HP Carly can’t block Hillary from playing the “halfway competent” card.
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Rand Paul today said the GOP needs to “tax cuts to help poor people.” Sort of like fighting wars for peace?
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Kendall Schier, originally credited with being the woman winner of the this week’s St. Louis Marathon, was stripped of her victory because officials found she actually joined the race after the last checkpoint. And a new generation learns the name “Rosie Ruiz.”
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After the Wizards’ Paul Pierce said the Raptors didn’t have “it”, the Toronto fans and media have been all over him. The Sun newspaper in fact had a picture of Pierce as Gandalf, the OLD Wizard. Did the Sun forget? Gandalf knew about getting rings.
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So has #ARod really gotten his swing back? Or has he just found an undetectable PED?
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: A-Rod jokes, Earth day jokes, Janice Hough, NBA jokes, SF Giants jokes Carly Fiorina jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 16, 2015
Too easy but someone’s got to do it. The Apple Watch, scheduled to be in stores April 24, now won’t be there until June. Isn’t the first function of a watch to be on time?
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Chris Christie Tuesday said if elected President that he would enforce federal law against states that have legalized marijuana. “I will crack down and not permit it.” Whatever happened to small government “states’ rights” conservatism?
Guessing whatever electoral map the New Jersey Governor has in his head never included California, Washington and Colorado?
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A West Virginia woman is suing Walt Disney Corporation, claiming that the company somehow inserted a rubber chip in her body without her consent. Really, does she expect to convince a judge or jury that Disney does ANYTHING for free?
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So last year United Airlines took away free alcohol on international flights in coach Now they’re announcing that as of June 1 they’re offering free beer and wine to international economy class passengers. Kind of the airline equivalent of doubling prices before a “Buy one get one free” sale.
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Washington State Auditor Troy Kelley has been indicted on tax-evasion charges. You’d think if nothing else he’d have been smart enough not to get caught.
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So with the Warriors having the best record in the NBA, and the Spurs having the best record over the past few weeks, Vegas has of course made the favorite to win the championship – the Cavaliers. Well, makes sense, they are the closest team to the East Coast.
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Toronto-based Ashley Madison is going public but in England. Going to to be interesting to see how many people buy stock who will swear they never use the website.
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Really? Rush Limbaugh and others are attacking Hillary Clinton for not tipping at Chipotle, and for not introducing herself and mingling with other customers. So a- how many of these folks tip at fast food restaurants, and b- if she HAD gone in and started talking to customers, Clinton would have been accused of disrupting normal Americans’ lunch for a photo op. #canweactuallytalkaboutissues?
If she had left a $20 she’d have been criticized for trying to buy votes. #cantwin
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The NBA playoffs are starting. But to put in perspective how crazily long the process is, if baseball used the same format, the World Series “Fall Classic” could end in December.
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The D.A in the Aaron Hernandez case said “the fact that he was a professional athlete meant nothing in the end.”. True, but had Hernandez not been an athlete they’d have locked him up and thrown away the key a long time ago. Instead of after a months long trial with the best defense money could buy.
#BruceBochy turned 60 today. As the #SFGiants and #DBacks game goes into the 12th, right about now he’s got to be feeling 70.
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Some of the younger generation may find it hard to imagine travelling without cellphones. But just as hard to imagine now travelling with luggage without wheels.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: airline jokes, Apple jokes, Chipotle jokes, Chris Christie jokes, Disney jokes, Janice Hough, NBA jokes, rush limbauh jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 15, 2015
“I am shocked”. Said absolutely no one. #AaronHernandez.
Turns out the person who most needed an #NFL team in #LosAngeles was Aaron Hernandez.
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Aaron Hernandez actually looked surprised when he was found guilty of murder. Was he counting on talking to OJ for advice on finding the real killers
Now that Aaron Hernandez has been found guilty, will they try him for those other two murders? Guessing the Patriots regrettably have given up on pinning him with those under-inflated balls.
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Cleveland Browns coach Mike Pettine on drafting Johnny Manziel. “We had the information that everyone else in the league had. It’s easy to look back now and say ‘What did you miss?”. And even Captain Obvious is snickering, “Really?!”
Actual warning on a frozen pizza “Not ready to eat. Cook before serving.” #cantfixstupid
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But the winner is. A New York man found bedbugs in his rental car. Someone apparently told him he could kill them by saturating them with alcohol. Which he did. And then sat in the car and lit a cigarette. Did kill the bugs. And the car. First and second-degree burns for him. Plus the #cantfixstupid award for the week. So far.
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Kim Kardashian has an actual book coming out May 5. It’s a collection of selfies titlled “Selfish.”. Give her credit for truth in advertising.
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Okay, who else saw the headline about a man arrested for landing a helicopter on the Capitol lawn and thought. “Secret service joyride?”
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United Airlines is offering Mileage Plus members the chance to use their miles to attend a batting practice event with the Los Angeles Dodgers. The way the SF Giants are hitting, they might have a similar event and make it a tryout.
The Cleveland Browns unveiled new uniforms yesterday, with nine different jersey combinations. Team president Alec Scheiner. “We could be like Oregon of the NFL.” Like “Oregon?” Meaning almost but not quite good enough to win the BCS championship?
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In Hillsborough County, Florida, near Tampa, the sheriff’s office has shut down a training school for “top earning exotic dancers and models.” after complaints of loud noise and late parties. Shame. Might have actually been classrooms where they could have gotten a lot of the state’s “student-athletes” to attend.
Cheryl Rios, CEO of “Go Ape Marketing” in Dallas, posted that she thought women could run business but didn’t think a woman should ever lead a country., “‘With the hormones we have, there is no way [a woman] should be able to start a war.” And said she would move to Canada if Hillary Clinton became president.
Not that Canada would take her, but at least Rios didn’t threaten to move to England. #cantfixstupid
“Not with a bang but a whimper.” Was T.S. Eliot thinking about the Lakers, who are putting an exclamation point on their lost season with a loss at home to… .Sacramento?
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: #cantfixstupid, Aaron Hernandez jokes, Browns jokes, Giants jokes, Hernandez guilty jokes, Janice Hough, Kardashian jokes, secret service jokes
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April 14, 2015
The San Antonio Spurs are playing so well down the stretch, the NBA may end up classifying Ensure as a PED.
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Wow. Just wow. That mother who dangled her 2 year-old over a cheetah enclosure, and then accidentally dropped him has been placed on leave from her job. Which is, or rather was – assistant director of a Columbus, Ohio “Kindercare” childcare center. #cantfixstupid #whythereisnosatire #NottheOnion
Will someone please tell the #SFGiants that the sign on the ATT Park grass is not spelled Opening Weak. #OpeningWeek
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The #SFGiants are scoring like folks at an #AARP convention with a Viagra shortage.
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The Chicago Cubs are offering a new “Mac and Cheetos” hot dog For all those fans who have decided maybe it’s not worth living to wait until next year.
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Considering all the injuries this year so far #SFGiants home opener could have been worse. #Madbum could have fallen off the horse.
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Billy Joel, 65, and his 33 year old girlfriend are apparently expecting a baby daughter. Stand by for a change from “Uptown Girl” to “Up-all-night Girl.” “And when she wakes up And makes up her mind…..”
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Some educators in Atlanta are going to prison over illegally inflating test scores for students from struggling schools. Idiots. If only they had just done it for athletes….
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Bus to hell time. Can they transfer Lawrence Phillips to the same prison as Jerry Sandusky?
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Carly Fiorina said in an interview on “Morning Joe” that Hillary Clinton, while an “inspiration to women”, doesn’t have a record of “accomplishments.” I guess Carly figures she knows accomplishment. How many women have gotten their companies to pay them $20 million to leave?
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The top Republican and Democrat on the Senate Foreign Relations Committee said they have reached a bipartisan agreement on legislation that would allow Congress to review a final nuclear deal with Iran. What? Must be a joke. This sounds too rational
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The San Antonio Express-News reports that Joan Cheever, a chef who has been feeding the city’s homeless for the past decade, was cited last night by police with a $2,000 ticket for serving food without a permit. She plans to argue in court that under the 1999 Texas Religious Freedom Restoration Act, she has a right to serve food to the homeless because she considers it a free exercise of her religion.
Okay, where are the defenders of Indiana and Religious Freedom on this one??!!
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If President Obama wants to do something with that “sponsor of terrorism” label he took off Cuba a lot of women would have no problem if he put it on Saudi Arabia.
Jeremy Lin on the Lakers “I do think we’re headed in the right direction.” Well, if the goal is a lottery pick, yes indeed
The makers of “Kind” bars have been warned by the FDA because “the products do not meet the requirements” to say the bars are a “good source of fiber” with “low sodium” and “no trans fat.” Well, as if anyone expected to find wood chips in “cottage” cheese.
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Here we go again. John Boehner today said Obama should re-engage U.S. combat troops in Iraq to fight ISIS. Is the Speaker volunteering to go over and lead them?
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Hint to drivers: When a sign under a stop sign says “Cross traffic does not stop” it refers to the street your street is crossing. All cars. Not a comment on cross i.e. angry drivers #cantfixstupid #nearmiss #didnthavetimetobeawitnesss
From Marc Ragovin: “Upon kicking off his presidential run, Marco Rubio said “Yesterday is over, and we are never going back.” He then unveiled a five minute commercial featuring him and a superimposed Ronald Reagan.”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: #cantfixstupidid, Billy joel jokes, Boehner jokes, Carly Fiorina jokes, Cubs jokes, Indiana jokes, Janice Hough, SF Giants jokes, Spurs jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 13, 2015
Of course, the way things went, the SF Giants might have had better luck scoring if they were playing polo.
Even though some may think that three World Series rings in five years is getting old, it’s important to remember. The Chicago Cubs won back-to-back World Championships in 1907-08. #SFGiants #carpediem
Tom Brady bounced his opening day pitch at Fenway Park today. But to be fair, the Patriots don’t have a Marshawn Lynch equivalent Brady could have handed the ball to.
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Maybe the #SFGiants are having a hard time batting with all those rings on their fingers?
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Meanwhile, the first Monday night baseball game of the season will feature the Yankees vs the Orioles. Guess those three nationally-televised games against the Red Sox didn’t give the Bronx Bombers enough exposure?
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Barry Bonds has spoken up in support of A-Rod and says he doesn’t know why baseball and the Yankees aren’t celebrating his milestones. Now, I am NOT a fan of Alex Rodriguez, but baseball’s attitude to him is a bit like Dr. Frankenstein complaining about someone building a monster. #chicksdigthelongball
Yeah, I know, “Anything can happen.” But does anyone really care who gets the 8th seed in the NBA Eastern conference?
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Marco Rubio is the latest entrant into the 2015 Presidential race. Two candidates now from Florida. Better make that clown car a convertible.
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An Alaska Airlines flight had to make an emergency landing to rescue an employee who got stuck in in the cargo hold (which was at least pressurized.) The airline has stated this incident was a complete aberration, and not a test to see how it might work in future to transport passengers on their lowest fares.
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So apparently that Alaska Airlines employee who was trapped in the cargo hold fell asleep in there. Asleep?! Really?! United Airlines is now trying to figure out how many “comfortable bed” tickets they can sell in cargo.
Another headline today about 100 people sick on a cruise ship, this time the Celebrity Infinity, which holds over 2,000 passengers plus over 1,000 crew. So 100 out of about 3,000 people. That’s much better odds for avoiding vomiting etc than most people get on say, spring break.
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From Bill Littlejohn, Apparently Wisconsin basketball coach Bo Ryan caused quite a stir with his post-NCAA Tournament “rent-a-player” comment. Now the Oakland A’s are considering suing for trademark infringement.”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: A-Rod jokes, airline jokes, Alaska Airlines jokes, Brady jokes, clown car jokes, Janice Hough, madbum jokes, Opening day jokes, Rubio jokes, SF Giants jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 12, 2015
Congrats to Masters’ champion Jordan Spieth. And how young is Jordan? The first people he hugs after his win are his parents.
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Arlo Guthrie is on a “50th Anniversary Alice’s Restaurant Tour.” Well, now you can still get anything you want, if you can remember what it is you wanted.
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Hillary Clinton today announced her candidacy for the Presidency. The speech was sponsored by Captain Obvious.
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Pence, Ishikawa, Cain, Peavy, Belt… Now the latest SF Giant to get injured this year was Casey McGehee last night with a strained knee. Has someone informed the team that “Eight Men Out” is not a desired goal for the home opener?
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The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim seem determined to dump Josh Hamilton. Well, if they’d eat most of his salary maybe the SF Giants should take a chance on him? #poweroutage
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The NY Knicks and Orlando Magic, both lottery teams, combined for 15 points in the second quarter of Saturday night’s game. 15 points combined. Not a typo. And more than a few college one-and-dones suddenly thought, maybe staying in school another year doesn’t sound that bad.
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Anneget Raunigk, 65, of Berlin, already has 13 children, and is now 21 weeks pregnant with quadruplets, using donated sperm and eggs. Even the Octomom is thinking “Is she nuts?”
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On a brighter note, Raunigk should be transitioning to diapers about the same time she trains her toddlers out of them.
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Overhead (for real) at farmer’s market. Woman runs up to husband “Why are you in line here?”. He says “It was a long line. Figured their stuff must be good.”.
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There was a “fatal incident” Sunday at the Richard Petty Driving Experience at Walt Disney World in Orlando. The attraction, which was scheduled to close in late June anyway, allows tours to drive NASCAR at speeds of up to 165 mph. Let’s hope the victim wasn’t texting at the time.
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Rand Paul today, “Some of the hawks in my party, you can’t find a place on the globe they don’t want boots on the ground.” For a guy who can be bat sh*t crazy, Paul does have these astonishing moments of making sense.
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In Cleveland, a 3-year-old child apparently fatally shot a 1-year-old boy in the face. If only the baby had been armed.
A 2 year-old who fell into the Cleveland Zoo’s cheetah enclosure after being dangled over the edge by his parents is recovering. Apparently mom and dad went into the exhibit to rescue him, but as a local TV station reported “the cheetahs made no attempt to interact with the child or the child’s parents.” Making the big cats in this case, much smarter than the humans. #Cantfixstupid
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Marc Ragovin, “What a remarkable display of golf at the Master’s. It left me …. Spiethless”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: #cantfixstupid, age jokes, Giants jokes, Hillary jokes, Janice Hough, Jordan Spieth jokes, Knicks jokes, Masters jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 11, 2015
Eight errors for New York so far in five games. Time to refer to them as the YankEEEEEs?
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So the Red Sox and Yankees, after 19 innings Friday night, had the early game Saturday night for national television. Wonder how many people on the the East Coast went to bed, woke up and thought “My gawd, they’re STILL playing.”
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That 19 innings for the Red Sox and Yankees Friday lasted seven hours and five minutes, including a 16 minute power outage delay. And somewhere George Steinbrenner is thinking “Seven hours? Why I hired and fired Billy Martin fast than that.”
The NY Yankees are trying to void $6 million contract bonuses for A-Rod for each person he passes on the all-time home run list, saying they are no longer “milestones”, and they are prepared to go to arbitration over it. This could end up better than “The War of the Roses.”
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Forget about hearts in San Francisco. The 2015 Giants appear to have left their bats in Arizona.
So the Atlanta Braves put a punctuation mark on their rebuilding year by trading All-Star closer Craig Kimbrel before the season even started. And they are now, 5-0?! #Itsafunnygame
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Okay, so #Madbum is 1-1 with a 5.40 ERA. #Kershaw is 0-1 with a 5.84 ERA. #Giants #Dodgers #Miserylovescompany
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Providence beats BU 4-3 in the #FrozenFour final. But who but me hears “Frozen Four” and thinks of the last #SFGiants fans left during most late weeknight games at Candlestick.
And wonder how many parents hear “Frozen Four” and think ‘Dear Gawd, not MORE sequels.”
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Tiger Woods may or may not ever get back to the top of the golf world, and he may still have the biggest galleries. But Woods will never be as beloved as Phil Mickelson.
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Tiger Woods teaching his children not to swear would be kind of like Madonna trying to teach her children to dress appropriately.
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The Yankees are now 1-4. Of course, it’s early times, but how long until New Yorkers start looking forward to the Jets season?
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Why should the Yankees get all the headlines? – MLB announced that Mets closer Jenrry Mejia has been suspended 80 games after testing positive for stanozolol.
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Mets closer Mejia “I know the rules are the rules and I will accept my punishment, but I can honestly say I have no idea how a banned substance ended up in my system.” Got to be tempting for MLB to offer a 50% reduction in suspension to the first guy who says “I admit it, I blew it, they caught me.”
From Marc Ragovin – “Reuben Flores of the NY Mets is the very definition of a shortstop. He stops the ball and all of his throws come up short.:
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From Gary Bachman; “There’s a campaign to put a woman on the twenty dollar bill. And ‘In God We Trust’ will be replaced by “You Go Girl.'”
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For those at FOX who want to get a jump on head explosions in advance of Hillary’s announcement tomorrow: “In my opinion, President Obama is an honest man.” Raul Castro.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes
Tags: Frozen Four jokes, Giants jokes, Janice Hough, Masters jokes, Mejia jokes, Mets jokes, Red Sox jokes, Tiger Woods jokes, Yankees jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
April 10, 2015
Cleveland Cavaliers’ Kendrick Perkins had a 9-step travel that the referees did not call. 9-steps?! “Amateur” sniffed Michael Jordan.
In Allen, Texas, a rancher was given a $266 citation for doing what he’s been doing for years, riding his horse to Taco Bell. Apparently it’s not allowed to ride on a public street. Now, if he’d just walked downtown carrying a couple shotguns….
Spurs beat the Rockets in Houston tonight 104-103. Are we sure that up in the rafters of the Alamodome along with all those banners there aren’t really ancient portraits of Duncan, Ginobili and Parker?
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So regarding this announcement Sunday, wouldn’t it be more of a headline if Hillary Clinton said she WASN’T running for President?
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Kentucky’s Karl-Anthony Towns may be the #1 NBA draft pick and he has said it obviously would be a little special” to play for the Knicks. Makes sense. Towns only spent one year with the Wildcats – he’d enjoy the chance to spend more years with top college-level players.
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Big news at the Masters. Tiger Woods will make the cut! (Oh, yeah, and some guy broke the 36 hole course record. Details, details….)
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Sad to hear of the passing of Richard Dysart, Leland McKenzie in LA Law. Hard as it might be to believe, for eight years there were actually lawyers you WANTED to see every week. #venusbutterfly
As the NHL regular season draws to a close, San Jose Sharks fans are asking Toronto Maple Leafs fans “So what do you do now to be disappointed during the playoffs?”
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The Grateful Dead sent a letter to their fans announcing two new concerts in June at Levi’s Stadium in Santa Clara on June 27 and 28. “Since we made the decision to go back to Chicago to say our final goodbye, it has become clear to us that we first need to return to our beginnings, where we first said hello — to each other and to all of you.”
Yep, talk about having million$ of rea$on$ to make thing$ clearer.
From Marc Ragovin “Troy Polamalu has retired. His final message to Steeler Nation: “I’m outta hair.”
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So on the day that it is first announced MLB is sending out “pace of game” warning to players, at the time of writing this post, the Red Sox and Yankees are heading towards 7 hours in an extra-inning game. Karma and her sister Irony are mean bitches.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: baseall jokes, Grateful dead jokes, Janice Hough, NBA jokes, Red Sox Yankees jokes, Texas jokes
Comments: 5 Comments
April 9, 2015
Hard to be believe there will come a time when Tiger Woods retires, and ESPN will have to report who’s actually leading a golf tournament as opposed to how Tiger is doing on the course.
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The seven top Kentucky scorers are all leaving early for the NBA draft. But the WIldcats are still favored to win the NCAA championship in 2016. Seinfeld used to talk about rooting for laundry, heck, this is rooting for a recruiting class.
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President Obama visited the Bob Marley museum in Jamaica and commented that he “had all his albums.” Some in the GOP immediately responded “That’s it, proof that Obama’s a ‘stoner.'” Some in the younger generation responded “what’s an album?”
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We’re almost to the NBA playoffs, which don’t end up with a catchy name like “World Series” or “Super Bowl.” Guess there’s just not enough of a ring to “April-May-June Madness”
The Minnesota Twins have scored 1 run in their first 36 innings. Are they trying to become the official MLB team of Major League Soccer?
#TroyPolamalu has retired. Many #Steelers fans will fly their hair at half mast.
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Well this should make for a fun locker room…. Last year Seahawks DE Michael Bennett called Jimmy Graham “one of the softest players in the NFL.” Now after Graham was traded from New Orleans to Seattle, Bennett said today in a radio interview “I still feel the same way, just because he’s on my team I don’t stop feeling that way.”
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An Icelandair plane enroute to Denver was hit by lightning. It landed 7 1/2 half hours later despite a hole in its nose. The aircraft will now be christened “Keith Richards.”
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Atlanta Hawks forward Thabo Sefolosha apparently fractured his tibia while interfering with police after the 4am stabbing of Indiana Pacers forward Chris Copeland outside “1 Oak.” Hmm, will the Knicks strategy to win next year involve giving opposing players nightclub passes?
From Marc Ragovin “Seen in New York: “Welcome to Madison Square. Where the Rangers and Knicks have combined for one President’s Trophy””
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The Padres’ Ian Kennedy out with an injury while pitching in the third. Shocking, the 2015 SF Giants are capable of breaking a player who isn’t on their own team?
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Hard for SF Giants fans to watch Casey McGehee make 2 errors tonight, AND hit into a double play with runners at 1st and 3rd in the 9th. Although Mcgehee is hitting .294. And Pablo Sandoval is hitting .167. #theoryofrelativity
From T.C. – the groaner of the week. “Cubs fans had to pee into cups as the restrooms at Wrigley Field were out of order on Opening Day. For those that drank more than a couple of beer, they needed to use a relief pitcher.”
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Chris Christie apparently is going to ratchet up his campaigning next week after falling in most polls. One of his NH supporters, Bill Greiner told CNN “John McCain was left for dead in 2007 and 2008, and look what happened. Gov. Christie is very similar to McCain.”
Does this mean the NJ Gov. will get the nomination and then pick a complete whack job for a running mate?
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On a serious note, just wondering, if they can put a camera and computer in a little phone, or a watch, why can’t they put a camera in a gun? Like a police gun. Like all police guns.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: baseball jokes, Janice Hough, Kentucky jokes, Knicks jokes, marijuana jokes, Masters jokes, NBA jokes, SF Giants jokes, Tiger Woods jokes
Comments: 5 Comments
April 8, 2015
The NCAA’s supervisor of officials said none of them saw the CBS video feed on the controversial out-of-bounds call at the end of the national championship game. But today Dan Gavitt, the NCAA’s VP told ESPN that officials DID see it. Ah, well this ought to reassure all the Duke conspiracy theorists….
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The Boston Celtics are making a late push for the #8 seed in the Eastern Conference. Isn’t that the NBA equivalent of making it to the March Madness play-in game?
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The mayor of Hillsboro, Mo, population 2,800, died March 9, but was re-elected yesterday. Well, maybe the voters figured, it’s been a month, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
New York Knicks owner James Dolan just said in an interview “You got to believe, baby! I believe, I believe!” And even Cubs fans are saying “Are you bleeping nuts?”
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Someone is selling a New Orleans Saints Super Bowl ring on Craigslist. Maybe one of the Jets should buy it, might be their best chance at getting a ring.
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Mitt Romney who had Duke over Wisconsin in the NCAA championship, tweeted “Should have put $10,000 on my bracket. Congrats, Coach K and @DukeU,” Prompting an immediate call for Romney to reconsider entering the 2016 race, from Pete Rose.
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I understand the American way of justice, and it’s mostly a good thing. Still seems somehow odd to spend millions of dollars saving a critically injured man’s life, and then millions of dollars to try him, and then probably now millions of dollars over appeals to a death penalty conviction. #BostonMarathonExplosion
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A new book about the White House says that during a fight after the Monica Lewinsky affair came to light, Hillary Clinton called Bill a “g*ddamn b*stard” and that she had him sleep on a couch for a few months. Some say the revelations could hurt Hillary’s candidacy. Thinking it might make a lot of women like her better.
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Aqib Talib, a CB for the Denver Broncos, who had charges dropped after an alleged gun incident in 2011, is apparently being investigated again for allegedly firing a gun into the air during a fight at a Dallas nightclub. So clearly the Aaron Hernandez trial is serving as a cautionary lesson to other NFL players. #facepalm #cantfixstupid
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Pitcher Chris Heston missed his Opening Day start for the Sacramento River Cats. Bummer. #SFGiants
(and the way his start went, he may never have that start.)
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The media is reporting that last year Barry Manilow married his manager and apparently long time partner. Garry Kief. I am shocked, said absolutely positively nobody.
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A scary thought about that South Carolina case. If the person with the cellphone video saw what really happened, what about that officer’s partner?
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As Rand Paul is getting unfavorable coverage for lecturing journalists, especially female journalists, on how to do their jobs, #”#Randsplaining is trending on Twitter. Well, it’s a good thing for Paul that if he stays in the Presidential race he won’t have to be dealing with this sort of thing in future. #cantfixstupid #cantfixarrogant either.
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Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Clinton jokes, Duke jokes, Janice Hough, Jets jokes, NBA jokes, NCAA jokes, Rand Paul jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
April 7, 2015
Oops. The NCAA’s supervisor of officials admitted today that the officials who gave possession to Duke after a late out-of-bounds play, didn’t have all the angles that CBS had. Although the TV replay showed the Blue Devils’ Winslow touching the ball with his fingertips. But to be fair, with amateur sports it’s not like the NCAA really has the money to do it right.
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If we’re going to have legalized discrimination, can some state become a pioneer in saying businesses do not have to serve stupid people? Because #cantfixstupid
Mitt Romney finished in the the top 1% of contestants in the ESPN NCAA tournament challenge, having Duke and Wisconsin and Duke winning it all. President Obama was in the 40th percentile. Of course, had Obama done as well as Romney the GOP would accuse him of having neglected his duties to focus on basketball.
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Kentucky coach John Calipari says he expects “five to seven players” to declare for the NBA draft. It’s a scary choice for these young men. But since returnees must be academically eligible, they’ll have to figure out how to find the classrooms.
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From Marty Robinson: “In Monday night’s NCAA championship game, Duke rallied to beat Wisconsin, earning their 5th title in the Coach K era. “Wonderful” said absolutely nobody outside of Durham.”
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Last night’s Miami Marlins opener was delayed 16 minutes by rain in the second inning, because the roof operators couldn’t get the roof closed fast enough. If only their supervisor had been armed.
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As pictures of all of these plastic cups full of something that isn’t beer circulate after Opening Night for the Cubs at Wrigley Field, here’s a tip for other teams: If you are doing a major renovation on your stadium, do the bathrooms first.
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Norwegian Cruise Line has an “enhanced” room service menu on some of their ships. And those menus will include a “convenience charge” of up to $7.95 per order. “Convenience charge?”! And many airlines are thinking, why didn’t we think of that?
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Mercedes Benz is coming out with a pickup truck. The perfect vehicle for all those cowboy politicians who still want to pretend they can relate to the “common man.”
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LeGarrette Blount, suspended 3 times at Oregon, and arrested last year for marijuana possession has now been suspended without pay for the 1st game of the 2015 season for a “violation of the league’s substance abuse policy.” This is clearly part of football’s strict “10 strikes and you’re out” policy.
An unnamed NBC source told Vanity Fair that Brian Williams “could not say the words ‘I lied.’ …He couldn’t explain what had happened. Asking ‘Did something happen to [my] head? Maybe I had a brain tumor, or something in my head?'”
Sounds increasingly clear that Williams was in the wrong business, He sounds less like a newsman than a politician.
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Despite a perhaps less than stellar record, Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel has won re-election. Should we be surprised? The town’s residents have a long history of supporting the “devil you know.” I mean, how many people have given up being Cubs fans?
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Lots of headlines about Derick and Jill Dillard (neé Duggar, of “19 Kids and Counting” having their first baby last night…. And thinking, as popular as this show is in some circles, wonder what the reaction would be if they were African-American?
Don McLean’s ‘American Pie’ manuscript sold for $1.2 million, Now, “American Pie” is iconic enough that even the younger generation knows the song. But many of them are wondering “What’s a manuscript?”
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A white police officer has been arrested and charged with murder after a video showed him repeatedly shooting and killing a 50 year old black man who was running away. Well, this might get some changes made. Wonder how many states will outlaw cellphone videos?
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The scariest thing about #WalterScott video is wondering how many of these shootings have happened where there is no cellphone video.
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Rand Paul is the latest to declare for 2016. While Paul has many interesting libertarian policies, he’s also come up with gems like this, opposing mandatory vaccination because of “many tragic cases of walking, talking normal children who wound up with profound mental disorders after vaccines.” Sigh #Cantfixstupid Even with medical school degrees.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: American Pie jokes, Chicago jokes, Cubs jokes, Don Mclean, Duggar jokes, Duke jokes, Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, Rand Paul jokes, Wisconsin jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
April 6, 2015
On Opening Day at Yankee Stadium, A-Rod apparently got the loudest ovation of any player when he was introduced. Figures, most comics work nights and had the day off.
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The NY Times reported today that Jeb Bush listed himself as Hispanic on his 2009 voter registration form. So where is Donald Trump’s call for Jeb’s birth certificate?
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Anyone but me think Mike Krzyzewski must have a really scary looking portrait in an attic somewhere? #NationalChampionship #Duke
Two controversial calls down the stretch that both went the Blue Devils’ way should do wonders for Duke continuing to be universally loved across the country.
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Bo Ryan, 67, would have become the oldest coach in NCAA tournament history to win his first national championship if Wisconsin won tonight. 67?! Makes Ryan about the average age of the San Antonio Spurs.
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The Los Angeles Dodgers won 6-3 today, but Clayton Kershaw gave up 3 runs in 6 innings. That’s it, he’s clearly over the hill.
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Pedroia and Ramirez on space for 324 home runs each. Pablo Sandoval on pace for 486 strikeouts. #OpeningDay #Redsox #SFGiants
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So much for all those who thought Kentucky could beat an NBA team. Of course, they still might be able to beat the Lakers.
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The Cubs went 0-13 with runners in scoring position and lost 3-0 on “opening night.” So how many of the Wrigley faithful are breaking out new “Wait until next year” t-shirts?
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From my friend Scott Russell. “It is apropos that the Red Sox play Boston College in their exhibition opener and the Philadelphia Phillies on opening day.” Scott does not say whether he believes Boston College or the Phillies to have been tougher competition.
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In most of Europe, Easter Monday is still a holiday. So why did we in the US fight for independence again?
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The playoffs may be different, but for Sunday night, age and treachery still overcome youth and skill. #Spurs #Warriors
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In Albuquerque, New Mexico, a father allegedly decided he was too drunk to drive, and got his 13-year-old son to take him on a beer run. Then dad got into an argument in the store and fired his gun eight times. (fortunately hitting no one.) He was arrested by cops who were conducting a DWI checkpoint across the street. Your move, Florida.
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So in Missouri, a GOP lawmaker has proposed that a bill that would ban food stamps for being used to buy “cookies, chips, energy drinks, soft drinks, seafood or steak.” Yeah, because you’d hate to have them waste money on tunafish? #dotheythinkbeforetheycomeupwiththeselaws?
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: coach k jokes, Duke jokes, Janice Hough, Jeb jokes, one and done jokes, Opening day jokes, Red Sox jokes, Wisconsin jokes, Yankees jokes
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April 5, 2015
Some Kentucky players didn’t shake Wisconsin’s hands, Andrew Harrison calls Kaminsky the N-word. Guess another problem with the one-and-done mentality is that not only do professors not teach them anything, Calipari didn’t teach them how to lose.
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But really, Wisconsin had motivation from a Final Four loss last year late on a Kentucky 3-point shot. Had many Wildcats been revenge minded from 2014 they’d have had to track down high school opponents.
Frank Kaminsky said of the racial slur from Andrew Harrison after the racial slur last night. “He reached out to me, we talked about it, [I’m] over it, Nothing needs to be made out of it.”Classy of Frank. Of course, maybe it helps that a- this might have been the first time that a white guy from Illinois with Polish heritage got attacked with the N word, and b – the Badgers won.
At least 29 arrests in Lexington after Kentucky’s loss to Wisconsin last night. Come on, can’t they make it 38 misdemeanors and 1 felony?
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Well, on the brighter side for Kentucky players, they’ll get a lot more comfortable in losing next year playing next year for the 76ers, Lakers, Knicks…
Apparently after the semi-final game, Kentucky fans were rioting and lighting things on fire in the streets. Imagine how classy they would have been if the Wildcats actually won.
“Tell him good bye.” #LonSimmns, 91, has passed away. Another great who will not outlast Candlestick. #Byebyebaby
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Rick Santorum, “Tolerance is a two-way street. If you’re a print shop and you are a gay man, should you be forced to print ‘God hates fags’ for the Westboro Baptist Church because they hold those signs up?” Uh oh. Is Santorum feeling so confident that he’s willing to risk the truly looney vote?
The Obama family attended Easter Sunday Alexandria’s Alfred Street Baptist Church, a predominantly African-American church. No doubt the reaction from many conservatives was split between accusing the President of pandering to minorities, to saying this confirmed his Muslim Baptist tendencies.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Janice Hough, jokes about march madness, Kentucky jokes, March Madness, NCAA jokes, Wisconsin jokes
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April 3, 2015
Off the coast of North Carolina, a man was rescued from atop his overturned sailboat after being lost at sea for 66 days. Presumably they’ve already optioned Tom Hanks for the movie.
Tiger Woods has announced that he is playing the the Masters. And why not? He’ll still have his weekend free.
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So with all this talk about “religious freedom” and “Christian values” etc, isn’t it time for some pharmacy owner to stand up and say, for starters he/she will refuse to fill Viagra prescriptions for unmarried or divorced men?
Congrats to Sarah Thomas, who will this fall become the NFL’s first full time woman official. All kidding aside, if she has been able to deal with the abuse it took to become a football official in the first place, Thomas should be just fine in dealing with NFL players.
Former Florida State DB P.J. Williams was arrested this morning in Tallhassee, FL and charged with DUI. Williams is projected as an NFL first round draft pick. So is Williams trying to be drafted by the 49ers, Redskins or Cowboys?
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A British couple who won a million pounds in the lottery in 2013, won another such jackpot last Friday. Wouldn’t you think one of the first things most people would do with a million pounds is stop playing the lottery?
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And okay, no one has details on the UN pact. But so for Republicans, what would be worse than President Obama being part of a Nuclear Deal with Iran? Being unable to come to a deal with Iran? Or was he wrong to negotiate in the first place? #somanywaystobewrong.
Okay, we’ve upped the ante lately but so alas this probably won’t be an overall award winner for 2015. But can we give the “bat sh*t crazy” award for April to Michele Bachman with this FB update
“With his Iran deal, Barack Obama is for the 300 million souls of the United States what Andreas Lubitz was for the 150 souls on the German Wings flight – a deranged pilot flying his entire nation into the rocks. After the fact, among the smoldering remains of American cities, the shocked survivors will ask, why did he do it?”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: florida okes, Janice Hough, NFL jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
April 1, 2015
Governor Jerry Brown has called for 25% percent mandatory water use reduction in California. So okay, it’s now our civic responsibility to drink wine!
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Don’t THINK this is an April Fool’s. Barbara Walters apparently wants Monica Lewinsky to join “The View.” Where no doubt besides doing interviews Monica will have a forum for telling America that she just wants to be left alone.
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So Kentucky is heading towards a potential 40-0 season. Greatest basketball team of all time? Or more like the greatest crop of high school recruits making a pit stop on the way to the NBA?
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All this excitement from millennials over the new Apple watch. What’s the next new thing going to be – the Apple calculator?
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A woman was arrested at San Jose International Airport after a UPS employee saw her walking inside a fence, the 5th such security breach at the airport in a year. It’s apparently easier to get over a fence at San Jose than to get a bottle of water past TSA.
Gary Dahl, 78. the inventor of the Pet Rock has died. And if you think “the what?” guessing you are not a baby boomer.
Now that Pet Rocks are back in the news suppose it’s only a matter of time until PETA posthumously vilifies Gary Dahl for not respecting the rights of rocks.
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Senator Bob Menendez of New Jersey has been indicted on Federal Corruption charges. Your move, Illinois.
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McDonald’s announced they are raising working pay at all their company-owned U.S. restaurants. So that their employees can now afford to eat somewhere besides McDonald’s?
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Seahawks LB Bruce Irvin sent out a tweet this morning that he’d been arrested for a DUI, then 30 minutes later said it was an April Fool’s joke. Hmm, how drunk did he have to think it would be funny to make that joke?
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Now the Republican-lead House the Arkansas has passed a “Religious Freedom Restoration Act” of its own. And Wal-Mart immediately issued a statement saying it threatened to undermine “the spirit of inclusion” in the state and “does not reflect the values we proudly uphold.”
Again, impressive. Who knew you could get WAL-MART on the moral high ground?
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Anyone but me think at first that #Walmart coming out in support of gay rights was an #AprilFools joke? #thetimestheyareachangin
From Marc Ragovin “The NY Mets announced today that injured second baseman Daniel Murphy, who recently said he would be uncomfortable with a gay teammate, will need to undergo a rehab assignment before he can come off the disabled list. And word is he’s insisting on going to Indiana.”
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes
Tags: California jokes, drought jokes, Indiana jokes, Janice Hough, McDonalds jokes, Pet Rocks
Comments: 2 Comments
April 1, 2015
USC AD Pat Haden tweeted today he will skip the College Football Playoff meeting this week in Indianapolis. “I am the proud father of a gay son In his honor, I will not be attending the FP committee meeting in Indy this week.” Impressive work by Indiana, who knew you could give USC the moral high ground?
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After supporting the new “religious freedom” law strongly, Indiana Governor Mike Pence today said “we’ll fix this and we’ll move forward.” Translation, “we had no idea that even old boys’ clubs NCAA and NFL would be against it. and we’ve $uddenly got million$ of rea$on$ to rethink thi$.”
New “Daily Show” host Trevor Noah is taking heat for tweets from a few years back that were misogynistic and/or racist. This should be interesting, Noah may turn off some regular viewers, but he might be the first person on the show to be defended on FOX News.
We’ll see how it plays out with Trevor Noah’s offensive tweets. But was anyone but me just a bit annoyed that the Daily Show had to go all the way to South Africa to find someone to replace Jon Stewart, rather than hiring a woman?
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Coach K and his former player-assistant coach both have chances to hoist banners this year. #Stanford #Duke #NITTournament #NCAATournament
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The average salary this year in Major League Baseball will top $4.25 million. You know what that means. Beer prices are going up.
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Phil Jackson, trying to reassure Knicks season tickets holders for next year said “We have a clear plan.” Uh, so did Custer.
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Josie Canesco, 18, daughter of Jose, was arrested for alleged DUI this morning. Maybe the apple doesn’t stagger far from the tree.
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Alabama RB Tyren Jones was already suspended for “conduct not to the standard of the football program. Now he was arrested for marijuana possession, the third Crimson Tide player arrest in four days. Yep, Nick Saban really is running an NFL type program.
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Asked why Tampa should make him the first NFL pick this year, Jameis Winston responded “Because I’m the best player in this draft.” Well, it’s a better answer than “Florida has cheap crab legs.”
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New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft said today in court that Aaron Hernandez told him he was innocent of murder. Well, and why would Kraft think anyone connected with the Patriots would have reason to lie?
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Just a hint to political fundraisers – putting “URGENT” on emails asking for donations is a great way to get things urgently put into the spam box.
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Tough time to be a environmentally conscious Californian. Starbucks gives you a 10 cent discount for bringing a reusable cup. But washing that cup takes water…..
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From Gary M, in response to my suggestion that the Falcons pay guys from local frats rather than paying a fine to pipe in crowd noise…. “Good idea, but the frats probably can’t make bail till after the weekend.”
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: #Marchmadness jokes, coach k jokes, Daily show jokes, Florida jokes, Indiana jokes, Janice Hough, NCAA jokes, NFL draft jokes, NIT jokes, trevor noah jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
March 31, 2015
Oops. Virgin Atlantic’s inaugural flight from Manchester, England to Atlanta was set to receive a “water cannon salute” from airport firefighters as it departed. Except apparently someone pressed the wrong button and sprayed, not water but foam, which clogged the plane’s engines and grounded it overnight. #cantfixstupid, airline division winner for the week.
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The NFL has fined the Atlanta Falcons $350,000 and take away the team’s fifth round draft pick in 2016 for illegally piping crowd noise into the Georgia Dome. And in Seattle they’re just giggling.
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Regarding that $350,000 fine that the Falcons got for piping in crowd noise, wouldn’t it have been cheaper for Atlanta just to have given free tickets to local frat boys?
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The German prosecutor on the Germanwings flight says now that medical records indicate the co-pilot had been suicidal in the past. Damn shame his therapist talked him out of it.
A woman gave birth in an Uber car Monday morning in Manhattan. Uber apparently had the car cleaned afterwards for the driver. But then they also gave him a pair of Knicks tickets. As if the poor guy hasn’t had enough trauma?
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Three #1 seeds and Michigan State in the Final Four. Means that those most likely to be winning their respective pools are generally risk adverse sports fans who happen to be from East Lansing.
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For the first time since 1996, Tiger Woods is not in golf’s 100 top ranked golfers. Standby for an ESPN special on “The Fall of Tiger.”
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Justin Bieber, in a USA Today interview – “My life is not easy” “I feel so sorry for him,” said nobody.
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Aaron Hernandez’s fiancee today on the witness stand said she had “‘learned to compromise’ over his cheating because their relationship ‘was worth fighting for.” File this under “Maybe-maybe not smart woman, REALLY foolish choice.
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McDonald’s is apparently testing a plan to serve breakfast all day long. The experiment will start in San Diego. But really, wouldn’t Colorado be more appropriate?
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Stubhub is suing the Golden State Warriors, because the team is telling season ticket holders that they can only resell tickets online through Ticketmaster. Otherwise they could lose ticket rights and/or playoff tickets. The issue, how much the Warriors make in “scalping’ service fees. Awful, this billionaire on billionaire violence…..
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An interesting and positive sidelight perhaps of this Indiana law. Not so much who is condemning it, but in who is not supporting it. Usually with civil rights issues these days, there are a host of GOP leaders and Presidential wannabes screaming freedom and states’ rights. But from Palin, Jindal, Trump, Perry…. crickets.
(after I wrote this at first Cruz and Santorum and actually Jeb Bush came out in support of the law. So the clown car is loading up. But not a word from Palin…. maybe Bristol made some friends on DWTS who she’s invited to the weddin.)
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Moving on from fraternities, now at the University of Mary Washington in Virginia, a college rugby team has been suspended indefinitely over an audio where the players can be heard chanting “Finally found a whore, she was right and dead…”
Okay, leaving the nasty nature of the words aside, shouldn’t any college student in the country now know that ANYTHING you say now 24-7 in a group of people can and will be recorded and held against you? #cantfixstupid
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From T.C. “GB QB Aaron Rodgers was celebrating with the Final Four bound Wisconsin Badgers basketball team. When asked if he was looking to recruit a tight end with a basketball background like Gronk or Jimmy Graham, he replied, “No, I’m actually looking for someone that can recover an onside kick”.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: #cantfixstupid, atlanta falcons jokes, Final Four jokes, Janice Hough, marijuana jokes, McDonalds jokes, Tiger Woods jokes, Uber jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
March 29, 2015
Carly Fiorina said today there’s a ‘higher than 90 percent’ chance she’ll run for the GOP presidential nomination. And why not? Why should there be a “no girls allowed” sign on the clown car?
Carly Fiorina attacked Hillary Clinton Sunday saying that Clinton “doesn’t know what leadership means,” and that her “character is flawed.” And who better to opine on those two subjects than a woman whose leadership and character prompted HP’s board to pay her $20 million just to go away.
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Indiana Governor Pence said it was “not a mistake” to sign the “religious freedom” law. Have to think some other governors agree with him – particularly those who compete with Indiana for convention business.
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Passengers had to be rescued after the Coney Island Cyclone got stuck on its first ride of the year. And many New Yorkers are thinking that this spring rather than riding actual roller coasters they’ll just stick to watching the Mets
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Apparently some people are taking selfies in front of the New York East Village building that blew up last week, resulting in 25 injuries and probably two deaths. Which is shocking on two levels, perhaps less that folks are that insensitive, but more that they are stupid enough to post them publicly.
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Not only is there no Cinderella this year, Mike Krzyzewski, Tom Izzo, John Calipari and Bo Ryan probably can recite the answers, and the questions, from Final Four reporters by heart.
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These days Duke too has embraced the “one and done” philosophy. Which for many basketball fans just means they can now just hate individual Blue Devils for a shorter time.
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British Airways says some of their frequent-flyer accounts have been hacked. and some Executive Club members may not be able to use their miles until the airline resolves the issue. And perhaps until British Airways and others figure out how to add a “mileage security” fee.
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Alabama coach Nick Saban last year signed Jonathan Taylor, a 6’4″, 335 pound defensive lineman, who was dismissed from Georgia’s football team after an arrest for felony domestic violence. Saban said at the time “he was the kind of guy that deserved a second chance.” Now Taylor has been arrested again for domestic violence. I guess “the kind of guy that deserved a second chance” translates to “he’s a 6’4″ 335 lb defensive lineman.”
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One week until MLB opening night in Chicago. Where the temperature today was a high of 46 degrees and the low tonight is projected at 37. Heck, if baseball wanted it to be that cold for the first game maybe they could have asked the demolition crews at Candlestick Park to hold off a little longer.
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Why does #religiousfreedom so often mean “freedom for everyone to follow MY religion?
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: baseball jokes, Carly Fiorina jokes, Chicago Cubs jokes, Duke jokes, Final Four jokes, Indiana jokes, Janice Hough, Mets jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
Left Coast Sports Babe 