Posted tagged ‘Palin jokes’
September 26, 2014
The SF Giants clinched a playoff spot due to another Brewers meltdown. So did they have Champagne mixed with Gatorade in tonight’s game cooler?
(Sure looked like it when the bullpen imploded in the 6th and 7th)
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Nothing is certain but death, taxes and Tim #Lincecum against the Padres. #SFGiants
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Anyone easily offended, skip to the next item. Anyone tired of vanilla clubhouse speeches, cover your children’s ears and listen to the Reverend Hunter Pence. http://deadspin.com/we-now-go-live-to-hunter-pences-dirty-dirty-mouth-1639410347?utm_campaign=socialflow_deadspin_twitter&utm_source=deadspin_twitter&utm_medium=socialflow
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Stay classy. Fox News’s panelist Eric Bolling asked yesterday if a female fighter pilot may be called ‘boobs on the ground. Well, a Fox News panel can certainly be called “boobs on the air.”
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Anyone who has the attitude that Washington, D.C. is good for nothing, clearly isn’t a fan of an NFL team needing to get healthy.
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Have to wonder with all this controversy over the Redskins name, would it be any different if Dan Snyder were less of an a**hole and the team were less of a train wreck?
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Washington looked so overpowered tonight that out of habit House Republicans called for a Congessional Investigation against Obama. #Redskins #Giants
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So much for that ‘special relationship” between the U.S. and England. The Dolphins and Raiders are playing in London this Sunday. We couldn’t have sent over better teams, like say, Oregon and Florida State?
(My friend Jeff K. says ” It’s a showcase game. Trying to see if England can take one of those teams off our hands and send them down to some international league.“)
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A 6.2 earthquake hit near Anchorage, Alaska this morning. So will Sarah Palin blame this on the “lame-stream” media or Obama?
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Alex Kaseberg says the earthquake was so strong it shook Sarah into a bookstore.
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Mitt and Ann Romney are dropping hints that Mitt might run again in 2016. Perfect. Because Romney is like that ex who looks good from a nostalgic distance, until you start spending time with him/her again and get reminded why you dropped them.
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Attorney General Eric Holder has resigned and says he will step down as soon as a successor can be confirmed by the Senate. This Senate?! Means Holder will probably be around through the end of President Obama’s term.
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-The Orioles had clinched. So did Evan Meek groove a pitch to #DerekJeter ? #Yankees
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#ESPN & #RogerGoodell seem hell bent on making Congress look credible by comparison.
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At the University of Texas, new coach Charlie Strong has drug testing of football players on pace to double. This was reported by the Austin American-Statesman and presumably every SEC football recruiter.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Fox News jokes, Janice Hough, Jeter jokes, Palin jokes, Redskins jokes, SF Giants jokes, Washington jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
September 22, 2014
A fake ad on Twitter suggested that Apple iOS 8 users could charge their phones in the microwave. Apparently some people have tried. And somewhere Darwin is weeping.
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After a long separation, Bruce and Kris Jenner have announced they are divorcing. Apparently the train wreck that has become the NFL is taking too many headlines away from the Kardashians.
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So #BruceJenner and #KrisJenner are divorcing. Guess Kris finally decided for sure she wasn’t gay?
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SF WR Anquan Boldin claimed the officiating cost the 49ers “another game” yesterday. Of course, what’s this team really needed was the refs to call the game over after three quarters.
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A German FIFA executive says he doesn’t think the 2022 World Cup will be held in Qatar. Because they’ve finally come to their senses on the heat? Or because someone is offering a FIFA a bigger bribe?.
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Need to tell #Panda that salary drive year means hitting more than his weight in Sept. He’s barely hitting Lincecum’s weight #SfGiants
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Baltimore Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti complained today that the ESPN report about the Ray Rice case was from “a majority of the sources [who] are people that work for Ray Almost everything in there is anonymous, but it’s clear from the subject matter that it’s Ray’s attorney, it’s Ray’s agent, it’s Ray’s friends.” Possibly, but one thing Bisciotti didn’t say was that anything in the report was untrue.
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Sarah Palin defended her family on Facebook after the brawl earlier this month where police were called, with a post that included a picture of Bristol with a gun ‘“I love my Bristol! My straight-shooter is one of the strongest young women you’ll ever meet. I have to say this as a proud mama: right up there with their work ethic and heart for those less fortunate, my kids’ defense of family makes my heart soar!”
This might be the first time that “Bristol Palin” and “work” have been mentioned in the same sentence.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: 49ers jokes, iPhone jokes, Janice Hough, Kris Jenner jokes, NFL jokes, Palin jokes
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September 13, 2014
Virginia Tech, who upset Ohio State last week, today lost to Eastern Carolina. Just thinking if you are a Big Ten fan, might be safe to make vacation plans during the BCS playoffs.
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In tonight’s UCLA-Texas football game, UCLA won the coin toss, and elected to defer. But then Texas chose to kick off. So the Bruins got the ball to start BOTH halves. Texas edukation at its finest.
To be fair, maybe the Longhorns wanted to receive in the third half?
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Just to put things in perspective, BC, with a 37 to 31 win tonight over USC, was inside the Trojan 35 yard line 7 times. 2 times LESS than Stanford last week.
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Unlike Stanford, Boston College decided not to use the 30 yard line to go into their prevent offense.
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Although today, Army was shut out by #Stanford 35 to 0. Clearly this is Commander in Chief Obama’s fault.
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More “stuff” you cannot make up. Newt Gingrich has now signed the “Family Leader” group’s “Marriage Vow,” which includes a “pledge to uphold the institution of marriage through personal fidelity to my spouse and respect for the marital bonds of others.” So Newt will not cheat on Calista, the third wife he cheated with when he was married to his second wife, with whom he cheated with on this first wife….
Dan Snyder said of Roger Goodell- “We are fortunate to have him as our Commissioner. The entire Washington Redskins organization strongly endorses his efforts…” Well, yeah, no sh*t. With Goodell lately, the Redskins name drama has been knocked completely off the front page.
Some statements don’t even need a punchline: This advice to Ray Rice “To Ray, or anybody else… It’s all about how you control yourself.” From Chris Brown.
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Taylor Swift is now saying “I didn’t really love any of my exes’ So how long until she turns that sentiment into a song?
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New MLB slogan: When we suspend players, it’s because they only illegally hit baseballs.
So police were called to that brawl involving the Palins, and the family was asked to leave. No arrests have been made but the investigation is ongoing as apparently it was a “verbal and physical altercation” Guess it’s not just the President Sarah means when she says “Charge in, strike hard, get out. Win.”
The average space between airline seats in 1990 was about 34-36 inches, now it’s more like 30-32. Well, it’s a good thing that Americans are getting smaller too…. Oops, never mind.
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Police detained a man on a Southwest plane in Seattle because on 9/11 other passengers noticed he was using names for his wi-fi hot spot like “Southwest – Bomb on Board.” and “The Bomb is on this Seat.” Then something about the flight attendant being hot. No word on charges, but figure they should include felony stupidity.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: BCS jokes, Goodell jokes, Janice Hough, Newt Gingrich jokes, NFL jokes, Palin jokes, Texas jokes, USC jokes
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September 11, 2014
In South Africa, verdicts can take two days. And in Thursday’s’s first day of the verdict in the Oscar Pistorius trial the judge says Pistorius is not guilty of murder. Wonder if she grew up in Los Angeles? Or if she wants to move there.
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In San Francisco, 49ers announcer Ted Robinson on KNBR-AM said Monday about Janay Rice, “How does she marry him after that? How does she go in front of Goodell? That’s pathetic to me.” And Robinson got suspended two games. The same original suspension Rice got…….
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So Ray MacDonald plays after his domestic violence arrest, as Aldon Smith did after his DUI arrest and announcer Ted Robinson gets suspended for his insensitive comments. So is the lesson here in the SF football world, we’ll give you due process on whatever you do as long as you keep your mouth shut?
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Indiana Pacers star Paul George “I don’t condone hittin women or think it’s coo BUT if SHE ain’t trippin then I ain’t trippin.. Lets keep it movin lol let that man play!” So where’s the app that says “You are a public figure, do you REALLY want to post that?”
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Tough Thursday night NFL game for women #SteelersRavens. – the team supporting the alleged rapist against the team that supported the wife beater.
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Now according to OTL, several sources are saying Ray Rice told Roger Goodell in June that he had punched his fiancee in an elevator, and “that he was sorry and that it wouldn’t happen again.”. Though the NFL commissioner just said “when we met with Ray Rice and his representatives, it was ambiguous about what actually happened.” Hard to believe, but Rice may come out of this looking better than Goodell.
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So is there a 2014 unwritten rule that in Northern California one baseball team must s*ck at all times? #SFGiants #As
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Bud Selig today, asked about the Rice/ Goodell situations says that a domestic violence “has been discussed (by MLB), because we’re sensitive to all issues.” Right, another of Selig’s “blue ribbon committees.” Amazed the man hasn’t strained an arm patting himself so hard on the back.
Paloaltoonline.com notes that Stanford football is “not ready to push the panic button” after last week’s loss to USC. And based on last week, if the Cardinal offense got close to the panic button, they probably couldn’t hit it.
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Kanye West went to a hospital emergency room in Australia for “a pretty intense migraine.” About as big a headache as many Americans get hearing about him and Kim?
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Sarah Palin on the mess in the Mideast. “War is hell. So go big or go home, Mr. President. Big means bold, confident, wise assurance from a trustworthy Commander-in-Chief that it shall be worth it. Charge in, strike hard, get out. Win.” And just imagine, John McCain wanted this woman to be a heartbeat away from the Presidency.
A 6th-grade teacher in D.C. will apologize to students for asking them to draw comparisons between George W. Bush and Adolph Hitler. So they think she should have asked for comparisons between Cheney and Hitler?
(And yes, I know what she did was flat out wrong as a teacher and she should be reprimanded. Teachers should be held to a higher standard. Joke-writers on the other hand…..)
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Cheney jokes, Janice Hough, Kanye West jokes, Palin jokes, ray rice jokes, Roger Goodell jokes, Stanford jokes
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August 3, 2014
At a Swedish church. a woman found 80 skeletons stuffed into Ikea bags. Apparently they were excavated during a renovation five years ago and not reburied. Well, yeah, because presumably no one could figure out the instructions.
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Bristol Palin, who released a memoir, was on Dancing with the Stars twice, and had her only reality show, is now suing her baby daddy Levi for child support of $1750 a month dating back to 2012. Bristol claims zero income for 2013 and 2014. Guess she couldn’t do something unthinkable like go on welfare, or actually get a job?
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The #SFgiants are the only team in major league baseball with four different pitchers who have thrown a complete game. And many younger fans are thinking “what’s a complete game?”
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Michael Morse clearly turned a fly ball into a double tonight, but the SF Giants’ Jake Peavy let it get to him enough to give up four runs. So where do you go to find a “pitcher whisperer?”
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Jimmy Graham dunked a football over the goalposts today after a touchdown in the Saints scrimmage, a move that will be illegal this year this season. Wonder how many violations it will take to get a two-game suspension.
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A lot of angry, ignorant people were against bringing that American humanitarian doctor infected with Ebola to an isolation ward in an Atlanta hospital. Wonder how many of them are also anti-vaccine?
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Robert F. Kennedy Jr, whose first marriage ended in divorce, whose second wife killed herself while they were estranged, and who has allegedly been having a 2-year affair during his engagement, got married again today to Cheryl Hines. A smart woman, who knows? But she’s got the foolish choices part down.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes
Tags: IKEA jokes, NFL jokes, Palin jokes, SF Giants jokes
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July 9, 2014
Argentina over the Netherlands 4-2 in a penalty kick shootout. Setting up a World Cup final with Germany. Over-under on Nazi War Criminal jokes in the next 4 days?
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On a brighter note for the World Cup host country, think of all the underprivileged children in Africa who will be be thrilled with their “Brazil, 2014 Champions” shirts.
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Heard the US has offered to have a ceremony honoring the Brazilian soccer team. Their suggested venue? Wrigley Field.
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So Germany vs. Argentina for the World Cup Championship Sunday in Rio De Janeiro. For Brazilians that must be like a World Series game 7 featuring the Yankees played at Fenway, or the Dodgers at A T & T, etc…..
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Headline “Last Year’s Champion Drops Out of Tour de France.” And the response across America “Who?”
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Sarah Palin is saying she would like to join “The View.” Good thing Barbara Walters has retired. This prospect might have killed her.
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After Hobby Lobby, some religious leaders have asked President Obama to be exempted from his forthcoming executive order prohibiting federal contractors from discriminating against LGBTs. But okay, folks, if the point is limiting birth control and abortions, what better sex than gay sex?
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An LA jury found the Dodgers partly liable for the injuries to Bryan Stow, ordering them to pay only $4.5 million of an $18 million verdict. $4.5 million!? That’s less than a half-year contract for an average rental player at the trade deadline.
Lebron James’ second free agency tour continues without a final decision. Here we thought Lebron wanted to be Michael Jordan. Appears now he wants to be Brett Favre.
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Edward Snowden has asked for an extension on his one-year Russian visa. So, okay, people disagree on if he is guilty of a crime. Snowden CLAIMS, however, “If I could go any place in the world, that place would be home.” So if true wouldn’t you think he’d want to publicly defend himself back home in a trial?
President Obama today in Texas about the “immigration crisis.” “Are folks more interested in politics or are they more interested in solving the problem?” If Obama has to ask maybe he really hasn’t learned that much during four years in Washington.
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Joe Montana, playing in a flag football game which will be the final game at Candlestick Park this weekend “My jersey just got here. I’m pumped, it’s almost time for the game. #cantwait.” Flag football? Have news for Joe. Most of us CAN wait. Forever if need be.
Former New Orleans mayor Ray Nagin, 58, was sentenced today to 10 years in federal prison on corruption and graft charges. Which in Louisiana means Nagin may be released just in time to run for Governor.
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“Can’t fix stupid” item of the day. A small Pennsylvania newspaper does a reader opinion feature on various topics, complete with a photo of the responders. And a Bloomsburg University student opined on the Redskins name controversy. Campus police saw the picture, recognized it and arrested him for jumping bail in a DUI case…..
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From Marc Ragovin, on the story about two members of one of the NY Mets’ Single A minor league teams being recently arrested for drag racing. “I guess this gives new meaning to being on the fast track to the majors.”
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes
Tags: brazil jokes, Germany Argentina jokes, immigration jokes, Janice Hough, Nagin jokes, Palin jokes, Snowden jokes, World Cup jokes
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July 9, 2014
7-1 final. Germany hasn’t rolled over another country like this since…. oh, does this even need a punchline?
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This Brazil vs. Germany World Cup game should get us all ready for those thrilling September SEC-cupcake matchups.
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How ugly was it looking in Belo Horizonte against the Germans today? Wonder if the Brazilian team considered singing “Edelweiss” and trying to sneak out the back? #toosoon?
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#Dodgers score 5 runs off Justin Verlander in 1st, now trail #Tigers 12-5. Are both teams are taking turns emulating Brazil vs. Germany?
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Rough day for the Brazilian team. Maybe a record day for Caipirinha sales.
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Meanwhile, what a waste. Madison Bumgarner in an AL park with the DH. He was more likely to get a clutch hit than at least a few batters in the #SFGiants lineup.
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Cleveland has been selected as the site for the 2016 Republican Convention. Stand by for “Mistake by the Lake” jokes.
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Sarah Palin recently referred to today’s politics as “incorrigibly disastrous.” Well, if anyone should be an expert on “incorrigibly disastrous…”
(My friend Julia Park Tracey “I didn’t know she was polysyllabic.”)
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Two University of Miami football players, both projected starters, were dismissed from the team after being arrested on sexual battery charges against a “physically helpless” 17-year-old girl. Wonder how long it will take for them to show up “rehabilitated” on another team or on an NFL practice squad?
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This summer TGI Fridays will offer “Endless Appetizers.” $10 a person – no sharing please – unlimited refills of choices including Potato Skins, , Mozzarella Sticks and Boneless Buffalo Wings. Presumably the offer also comes with a free test for Type 2 Diabetes.
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United Airlines has announced they will outsource 630 jobs at 12 U.S. airports in a cost-saving move. So you thought that customer service was bad at Albuquerque; Buffalo; Charleston, Charlotte; Columbus, Ohio; Des Moines,. Detroit, El Paso, Sioux Falls, Wichita, Pensacola and Salt Lake City before…..
Former “Baywatch” star Pamela Anderson has filed for divorce again. So guys, they’re available.
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John Boehner wants another $3.3 million for another House investigation of Benghazi. Not sure what they hope to find out this time, though it now seems pretty certain that if Congress put as much money and effort into protecting our Embassies and Consulates as they are now into “getting” Obama, Ambassador Stevens and the others would be alive today.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes
Tags: airline jokes, brazil jokes, germany jokes, GOP jokes, Janice Hough, Miami jokes, Palin jokes, Republican jokes, World Cup jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
April 28, 2014
Leaving the racism aside, Donald Sterling also appears to be an incredible misogynist. Wouldn’t you think a beautiful woman who wants to be a temporary rich man’s mistress can find someone who’s a bit less of an a**hole?
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It will may only last as long as this playoff series but the Golden State Warriors have to thank #DonaldSterling for temporarily making them America’s Team.
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As much as other professional sports team owners are decrying the comments of the NBA’s Donald Sterling, have to wonder how many of them are hoping no one has tapes of THEIR phone conversations?
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As #DonaldSterling story completely dominates the media, have to wonder who leaked the tapes? #ClivenBundy?
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So the NAACP was going to give Donald Sterling a lifetime achievement award? What’s next? The NCAA planning to honor John Calipari for his commitment to student athletes?
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Hardest thing for the GOP in dealing with Donald Sterling’s comments other than dealing with the fraction of their constituents who agree with him, is trying to figure out how to spin that President Obama’s response is wrong.
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Sarah Palin, speaking at an NRA convention, said that gun-free zones are “stupid on steroids.” Thereby challenging all those who thought if there was anyone who should be an expert on “stupid on steroids…”
During Sarah Palin’s NRA speech she complained that the “Obama administration wants you ID’d” for having a gun. Okay, I guess being ID’ed should be reserved for truly dangerous things, like voting.
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Got to love United Airlines, sending a message at 632p saying that a 629p flight has been delayed at least an hour but “please be at gate for boarding PRIOR to the original scheduled departure time as the departure time could be revised again.” Uh, not exactly.
(And then sending the SAME, be at the gate before the originally scheduled 629p flight boarding time, at 730p…)
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NBC is adding Johnny Weir and Tara Lipinski to next week’s Kentucky Derby telecast as fashion correspondents. Thereby making the most asked question after “Who will win?” “What will Johnny wear?”
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The San Jose Sharks, originally up 3-0 in their series with the L.A. Kings, are now up 3-2 and reeling. Isn’t it kind of early for the team to be in late-round playoff form.
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A Phoenix man was arrested for using Craigslist to find sex with a horse. Really? Craigslist? Isn’t there an app for that?
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New NFL director of football operations Troy Vincent says he can see the NFL adding a developmental league. Don’t they already have that? It’s called the SEC.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Clippers jokes, Donald Sterling jokes, Janice Hough, NBA jokes, NFL jokes, Palin jokes, Sterling jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
March 1, 2014
A different sort of post today, after a memorial service for Jean Crawford, my dad’s partner of 26 years. Since she was basically my step-mother, I can’t claim I inherited my twisted sense of humor from her. But she shared it. And was always supportive. A funny, fabulous woman who was with us only 67 years.
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And since she was more liberal than I am – only political jokes tonight. More sports tomorrow.
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What a scary situation with Putin’s potential invasion of the Ukraine. Makes us long for those more innocent days when the biggest mess in Russia was their Olympic hockey team.
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Headline “Putin-Obama relationship in deep freeze.” This might be the frostiest interpersonal time for a U.S. President since Hillary found out about that blue dress.
Sarah Palin is in “Told Ya So” mode because she warned in 2008 that Obama’s reactions might lead to Putin invading Ukraine. And when asked about Crimea, Palin presumably responded, “well yeah, invading there too.”
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Joe Biden told an interviewer he was “given every sh*t job in the world” by Obama. Uh, isn’t “every sh*t job in the world” the Vice President’s job description?
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At least 28 people were killed by men wielding knives in China. Are they trying not to gloat too much at the NRA?
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An 8-year-old Cincinnati boy was shot and killed Saturday by one of his brothers. Police said the shooter was was playing with a loaded handgun that he thought was a BB gun. If only the 8 year old had been armed.
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Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Biden jokes, Janice Hough, Obama jokes, Palin jokes, Putin jokes, Ukraine jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
September 26, 2013
Mariano Rivera, 44, left the mound at Yankee Stadium tonight for the last time. “A promising career ended so young” said Jamie Moyer.
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O.J. Simpson has apparently been accused of stealing cookies in prison. What’s his defense going to be… if my clothes still fit, you must acquit?
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Apparently Cory Booker has been exchanging some flirty tweets (no pictures) with a Portland stripper. Oh, the indecision of it all, Some of his opponents would like to use this against the unmarried Newark mayor, but then it would go against their accusations of him being gay…..
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CNN reports that pilots snoozed in the cockpit of an Airbus A330 flying to London last August, (Apparently a Virgin America plane.) Stand by for a “pilot coffee” surcharge.
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From Bill Littlejohn: “New part-owner Shaquille O’Neal apologized to Sacramento fans for calling their team ‘the Queens’ back in the day.He did, however, encourage them to bring back their cow bells to the arena when Kobe Bryant comes to town”
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Sarah Palin is threatening to endorse Primary opponents for GOP Senators who don’t go along with Ted Cruz? Maybe Cruz should really endear himself to Palin and quit his Senate term halfway through.
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Bud Selig took over as acting MLB commissioner on Sept. 9, 1992, saying repeatedly he wouldn’t stay on in the job. He has now announced he will retire in 2015. When presumably Bud will join Cher on a farewell tour.
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Some try to compare Eli Manning to his brother Peyton. But the way the Giants started off this year, maybe the more apt comparison now is to his dad Archie with the Saints.
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An apparent deal has been reached on a U.N. resolution to require Syria to dismantle its chemical weapons stockpiles. Hmm, time for the House to vote to overthrow Obamacare again.
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Dodgers fans might want to skip this one – Even in a lost season there are joys. Like Tim #Lincecum striking out Yasiel #Puig three times in 7 innings. #SFGiants
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Wendy Davis is running for Governor of Texas. And somewhere Ann Richards and Molly Ivins are smiling.
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Woo hoo! Faceback says they are finally going to have an “Edit” function for original posts. So dyslexics and people who just type too fast – untie!
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Bud Selig jokes, Mariano Rivera jokes, MLB jokes, NFL jokes, Palin jokes, Ted Cruz jokes
Comments: 4 Comments
May 27, 2013
Arizona Diamondbacks pitcher Ian Kennedy missed his start today because he cut himself washing the dishes. And all over America, men are going “See, honey, I’d love to help clean up but for men that stuff is dangerous.”
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Sarah Palin attended the NBA playoff game in Indianapolis last night. Presumably to root for Miami. It might have been the only way for Palin to prove she could stand the Heat.
The Seattle Seahawks, with 5 players suspended since 2011 for PEDS, called a players only meeting today, reportedly “about not making the same mistakes over and over.” Taking the PEDS? Or getting caught?
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Apparently Donald Trump has spent over $1 million exploring a potential presidential bid in 2016. Say what? The guy wants us to trust him with the U.S. budget, and this is his idea of a good use of money?
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Sergio Garcia says he hopes to meet up with Tiger Woods in person to apologize for his “fried chicken.” Many fans would prefer the two wait to meet up until “Celebrity Boxing.”
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Toronto Mayor Rob Ford said that the media is a ‘bunch of maggots’ for reporting allegations that there is a video of him smoking crack. Wow. What’s next for for Ford if he has to step down… running for Governor of Alaska?
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So the Royal Caribbean fire, 3 nights into a 7 day cruise, appears to have been rather quickly contained, the ship did not lose power, there were no injuries. Plus everyone on board is getting a refund and a certificate for another cruise. But the happiest folks without a doubt- everyone at Carnival Cruise Lines.
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Embattled Rutgers AD Julie Hermann said that university President Robert Barchi has assured her she will keep her job. Uh, but doesn’t that assume Barchi will keep his?
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Since Memorial Day is a good day to remember we are all Americans and in this together, in that spirit will post that Clayton Kershaw, who gave up 4 runs in yesterday’s loss, had not allowed more than 3 earned runs in his last 22 starts. Yes, he is a great pitcher, yes, he is a L.A. Dodger. (Okay, I’m done now.)
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–A recent poll indicated 54% of Americans still oppose “Obamacare.” And let me guess, before the bill passed, about 99% of that 54% already had health insurance.
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Danica Patrick’s boyfriend Ricky Stenhouse Jr, caused her car and another to wreck in yesterday’s NASCAR race. Guessing there’s a moratorium on “women driver” jokes between them for a while.
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From Marc Ragovin :Tampa Bay Rays’ pitcher Roberto Hernandez, who was formerly known as Fausto Carmona, got hit hard by the Yankees the other day and now has a 2-5 record and a 5.72 era. Asked to comment, Rays’ manager Joe Madden said ‘he’s just not pitching like himself these days.'”
So if anyone hadn’t eaten enough junk food this weekend, the Bachelorette started tonight: Junk food for the mind
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: baseball jokes, Janice Hough, Palin jokes, Rob Ford jokes, Rutgers jokes
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May 5, 2013
Another walk off win for the SF Giants. 10-9 in ten. Salvaging a night where a possible “MLB The Show” curse caught up with Buster Posey – he hit into a bottom of the ninth inning-ending double play.
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Rough week to be a sports fan in Los Angeles. The Dodgers’ Hanley Ramirez, back on the DL, was on the active roster for less time than the Lakers and Clippers lasted in the playoffs.
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CB Cliff Harris was cut by the NY Jets after he was arrested for marijuana possession. This is the same Harris who was pulled over for driving 118 MPH in 2011 while playing for Oregon, asked “Who’s got the marijuana in the car?” a-nd responded “we smoked it all.” So does 2 + years now count as short-term memory loss?
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Kentucky Derby winning purse – $1,439,800. And the winner himself just gets chicken feed, or rather, horse feed.
(Augie does point out that the winner is probably at least happy with the stud opportunities.)
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Previously unbeaten Kentucky Derby favorite Verrazano, whose owner is from New Jersey, ended up 14th in the race. If he doesn’t perform better next race, he’s been threatened with retirement to Jersey.
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At an NRA convention, Sarah Palin spoke of Maggie Thatcher as “her hero.” Even though Thatcher refused to meet with Palin, and as Prime Minister supported gun control — overseeing a bill passed in 1988 outlawing semi-automatic guns. If Baroness Thatcher wasn’t dead, this might have killed her.
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A 35-year-old Arizona grandmother is being held and charged in the death of her 3-year-old grandson, who allegedly shot himself in the face with her handgun. Which she had left in her backpack with her meth pipe. Your move, Florida.
“The Great Gatsby” remake is opening, with Leonardo DiCaprio and Carey Mulligan reprising the roles played in 1974 by Robert Redford and Mia Farrow. Wonder how many people will think, “Great story, will there be a novelized version?”
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A bat that Mickey Mantle used in 1964 will be up for auction. And as confirmed by x-ray, the bat is corked. Once again, can we just put an asterisk on the banner outside the Hall of Fame and be done with it?
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New NRA president Jim Porter has called Barack Obama a “fake president,” referred to the Civil War as “the War of Northern Aggression,” and said that we should train all civilians to use standard military firearms to fight tyranny. Thus perhaps trying to prove the NRA’s stance that the US has a mental health problem not a gun problem.
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TC says “a small group of protesters want the NFL to change the name of the Washington Redskins. The league is considering “The District of Columbia Redskins” to appease descendants of the first President.”
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Finally a serious note. 43 years ago. May 4, 1970. Kent State The students who were killed would be grandparents by now: http://www.cleveland.com/metro/index.ssf/2013/05/kent_slayings.html
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: baseball jokes, Janice Hough, Kentucky Derby jokes, NRA jokes, Palin jokes, thatcher jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
May 11, 2012
You cannot make this stuff up dept: One of the people criticizing President Obama for his gay marriage decision, saying that “we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home,” is Bristol Palin.
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Here’s an interesting reaction to President Obama’s statement: “It is significant,” but “I, for one, am dissatisfied with half steps. I hoped for a leap from our president.” The speaker – Meghan McCain. Must be some interesting dinner table conversation in that family..
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Sarah Palin after President Obama’s saying his daughters influenced his thinking on gay marriage: “It would have been nice he had been an actual leader instead of merely reflecting what many teenagers think after one too many episodes of Glee.” Guess Sarah thinks Obama should have been watching more serious television – like Dancing With the Stars.
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Yahoo’s beleaguered CEO Scott Thompson allegedly said he wasn’t the one who fabricated a Computer Science degree and that he never noticed the bogus degree on his resume. If true, forget the lying, the man is too STUPID to be a CEO.
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If Thompson gets fired from Yahoo he certainly has a chance to catch on at Costa Cruises – the man has “fell into a lifeboat” down cold.
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The parents of an 18 month old said they were ordered to leave a JetBlue flight because the little girl was apparently on a no-fly list. Well, sounds like a TSA mistake. On the other hand, most frequent fliers can relate to being terrorized by onboard toddlers.”
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Howard Stern, who is going to join “America’s Got Talent,” says he would be a better judge than Jennifer Lopez is on American Idol: “If I sit there and just sit in a beautiful dress and tell them they’re wonderful, they’re not going to get anywhere.” And Steven Tyler said, “Wait, that’s my job.”
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.Less than two days after she said she became a Swiss citizen, Michele Bachmann is giving up that Swiss citizenship. Saying that she was making the quick change to prove she is a “proud American citizen.” Either that or she’s hoping to impress Mitt Romney as a potential running mate.
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Now that he’s with the NY Jets, Tim Tebow has changed the name of his dog “Bronco” to “Bronx.” What? Guess it was too unwieldy to call the pup “Meadowlands.”
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Time Magazine’s latest cover on “Extreme Parenting” shows a mother breastfeeding her four-year-old son, both of them standing up. And most teenagers think their parents had the most embarrassing little kid pictures of them….
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Gas prices have fallen as much as 20 cents a gallon in the U.S. in the last month. Stand by for Mitt Romney taking credit for it.
Leaving the marriage issue aside, here’s a question for my friends and readers of all political persuasions: Will there be an OPENLY gay male pro athlete in one of the major U.S. sports in the next 20 years? (Baseball, football, basketball, and sure, why not, hockey)
And if so, what sport? My friend Michael Duca suggests basketball: “just because sooner or later someone’s going to notice the one guy who does not have 7 children by 9 mothers.
Categories: sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: gay marriage jokes, Janice Hough, Palin jokes, parenting jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
April 5, 2012
Two A’s-Mariners games last week, Marlins-Cardinals tonight, the rest of MLB starts Thursday or Friday. Sorry Bud Selig, less is more; “Opening Day” is awesome. “Opening Week” s*cks.
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But really, we won’t know it’s really opening day until Cubs fans break out their new “Wait until next year” shirts.
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The Masters starts Thursday morning, from Augusta National Golf Club. One of the few places on Earth where Mitt Romney is referred to as “a regular guy.”
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Bond fans screaming “Say it ain’t so?!” Due to a Heineken contract, James Bond will be drinking beer instead of a martini in his next movie. What’s next, 007 telling women he wants to wait for physical intimacy until they are in a committed relationship?
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According to the autopsy report, “white powdery substances and a spoon with white residue” were found in the hotel room where Whitney Houston died. Sad, but “I’m shocked,” said absolutely nobody.
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Ryan Gosling apparently saved a British journalist named Laurie Penny from being hit by a car this week in New York. Earning him respect and admiration from his fellow actors, once they found out she didn’t work for “News of the World.”
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Macy’s flagship store in New York had to evacuate due to a small basement fire today. You know what that means. Stay tuned for Macy’s new “Two Day Fire Sale with One Day Special Preview.”
(or as my friend Rich suggests “Black Flower Days.”)
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John McCain urged Mitt Romney “not to rush to judgment” when picking his running mate. Gosh, wonder why he would say that?
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Kentucky coach John Calipari said he’s not planning to coach the New York Knicks or any other NBA team – “Kentucky is the best job in basketball coaching, why would I leave?” At least not until the next NCAA investigation.
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Sarah Palin’s appearance on the “Today” show apparently didn’t turn out to be the ratings boost NBC had hoped for. Does this mean “Palin-sanity” is over?
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Levi Johnston, 21, has announced that his latest girlfriend, Sunny Oglesby, 20, is pregnant. Levi told TMZ.com the pregnancy was an unexpected surprise: “Things happen and we are both happy with what came of it.” Yeah, looks like Bristol Palin’s abstinence campaign is really working.
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Ryan Seacrest will be taking part in NBC’s Olympic coverage. Wonderful. Stand by for “Who’ll win the Gold? We’ll find out, after the break….”
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Rick Santorum went bowling with some friends and staffers today, and ended up with three strikes and two spares while scoring 145. So at least when faced with a bowling lane, Rick proved it was possible for him to go towards the center.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Calipari jokes, Janice Hough, Opening day jokes, Palin jokes
Comments: 1 Comment
January 24, 2012
Mitt Romney says Gingrich is “erratic,” Newt Gingrich says Romney “can’t be trusted.” Who’s winning? President Obama.
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Costa and their so-to-be-ex Captain are going at each other hot and heavy in the media as to assigning blame for the crash and sinking of the Concordia. Will the famous term for buck-passing be updated to “throwing someone under the cruise ship?”
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Who knew? The true MVP of the 2011 49ers might have been Ted Ginn. Jr.
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Open note to all spammers. Work on spelling. Doesn’t exactly inspire fear in your targets when they get an email supposedly from Paypal titled “account suspended, for your proection (sic).
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A rumor going around about Ryan Braun is that he says his failed drug test is the result of his taking medication for an STD. (Herpes.) Not that I want to impugn anyone’s good name unnecessarily but considering the number of children along with the reputations pro-athletes have…. does anyone really think he’s the only one taking such medication?
Or to put it another way, if meds for an STD made you test positive for PED’s, wouldn’t we have a lot more players on the 50 day shelf?
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All these folks ragging on Steven Tyler for his lousy rendition of the National Anthem. It could have been MUCH more painful to watch – Tyler could have had a wardrobe malfunction.
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Kia Motors said it is recalling 145,755 cars in the United States because of potentially faulty driver airbags. Wow. Kia has sold over 145,000 cars in the U.S?
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Two part joke with my comedy writer friend Paul Seaburn, who wrote the first joke below:
“India’s government wants an apology from Jay Leno for a joke where he said that the Golden Temple, which is India’s holiest shrine, could be Mitt Romney’s summer home. Romney wants an apology too for putting the idea into his wife’s head.
My following joke. Wonder how long until we see a Leno joke about Britain’s crown jewels upsetting Newt Gingrich for the same reason.
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Chicago White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf on his former manager – “Regarding Ozzie Guillen’s departure last September, I want to make it clear that he left with our organization’s blessing.” Translate, Reinsdorf told Ozzie, don’t let the clubhouse door hit you in the “behind.”
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Quote of the night on “the Bachelor” from model Courtney ” “I’m a nice person, don’t f*ck with me.”
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Royal Caribbean sent a long email to past guests reassuring them on the cruise lines safety procedures and even including links to videos on the subject. Here’s a simpler idea – just send out an email “Our captains don’t joyride.”
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Rick Santorum’s spokesman said Mitt Romney called him to “concede victory” in Iowa. But Romney’s spokeswoman said his campaign didn’t concede, that “Gov. Romney (just) called Sen. Santorum to congratulate him on the Iowa results.” Can’t imagine where politicians get the reputation for doublespeak.
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Sarah Palin said that Chris Christie’s comment that Newt Gringrich was becoming an embarrassment “was reflective of a lack of self-discipline.” Well, if anyone is an expert on a lack of self-discipline….
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Sarah Palin also said of New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie that he got his “panties in a wad.” Sarah, really? Is that the visual you want to inflict upon the world?
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A new study published online by the New England Journal of Medicine finds that some people are allergic to cold. “See, I just cheated on Hillary for my health.” said Bill Clinton.”
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Costa Concordia jokes, Costa jokes, cruise jokes, GOP debate jokes, Janice Hough, Palin jokes, Romney jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
October 6, 2011
Or should we say R.iPeace.
But hey, give the man credit. Steve Jobs is already accomplishing things in the afterlife. He just knocked Sarah Palin’s “I’m not running for President” announcement off the front page.
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Probably too soon for jokes about iHeadstones or iCoffin jokes. But not that much too soon. (Two of my anonymous friends have already suggested something containing either would have a crappy camera.)
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Wonder which will come first, Jobs’ memorial service, or the first “tell-all” book.”
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Meanwhile, back to Palin jokes: Sarah announced that she will not run for president in 2012, and said the decision was “prayerfully considered.” Wonder if that means God responded to her prayer with “Are you out of your bleeping mind?”
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Fox regular lead baseball analyst Tim McCarver will have a “minor heart-related procedure” this week and be replaced in the booth by Terry Francona. Baseball television viewers the world over wish McCarver the best, but think he should take plenty of time off to recover, say until at least 2014.
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St. Louis has scored 18 runs against Philadephia pitching in just four games. Yes, the Phillies are a strong team. But before the national media tries, again, to anoint their pitching staff as the best in baseball, remember SF Giants’ pitchers would call 18 runs a bad week.
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Michael Vick says the Philadelphia Eagles will no longer use the name “Dream Team.” “Nightmare” is more like it.
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My friend Jerry Perisho points out: “There was a squirrel at the Cards-Phillies game. And, it wasn’t Bud Selig.”
(My only squibble with that joke, it’s insulting to squirrels.)
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The WAC commissioner apologized for an “excessive delay” when replay officials took 22 minutes to review a play in last weekend’s Hawaii-Louisiana Tech game. 22 minutes for a decision on one play?! Who was in the replay booth? Brett Favre.
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St. Louis has scored 18 runs against Philadelphia pitching in just four games. Yes, the Phillies are a strong team. But before the national media tries, again, to anoint their pitching staff as the best in baseball, remember SF Giants’ pitchers would call 18 runs a bad week.
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Stanford’s Andrew Luck now apparently has security guards when he is going to and from games, in part to protect him from countless professional autograph hunters. Fortunately Luck is still able to attend classes on his own, probably because these pros haven’t considered the idea of a Heisman candidate QB actually GOING to class.
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A high school kicker from Carson, NV hit a 64 yard field goal last weekend. He’s been offered several college scholarships and a tryout with the Philadelphia Eagles.
Quote in response to those who are denigrating Michelle Obama’s “Let’s Move” campaign against child obesity “I think it’s a really good goal to encourage kids to eat better. I’ve struggled with my weight for 30 years, and it’s a struggle. And if a kid can avoid that in his or her adult years, more power to them, and I think the first lady’s speaking out well.” The speaker? Chris Christie.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: major league baseball playoffs jokes, Palin jokes, Palin not running for president jokes, Steve Jobs death jokes, Steve Jobs jokes, Tim McCarver jokes
Comments: 4 Comments
September 22, 2011
Okay, the NFL season is officially in full swing: Jerome Simpson and Anthony Collins, are under investigation by law enforcement officials, after a package with about 2.5 pounds of pot was delivered and signed for at Simpson’s residence. And of course Simpson and Collins are teammates, on the Cincinnati Bengals.
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NFL sent a memo to all teams warning of fines, suspensions and more if players fake injuries during a game. “Are you trying to destroy the sport?” asked FIFA?
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Some would say the relatively close wild card races in Major League Baseball are a reason to expand the playoffs? Really? Watching the Red Sox and Rays alternate choking this week makes me think neither of these teams deserves to be in the playoffs as it is.
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Photosensitive epilepsy sufferers can have seizures triggered by “flashing lights or rapidly changing or alternating images.” How long until Facebook starts posting warning disclaimers?
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From Bill Littlejohn: “Oklahoma University has given Bob Stoops a seven-year extension worth $34.7 million. And the really good news is that it doesn’t count against the team’s salary cap”
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Another month, another Palin book, this time a memoir from Bristol Palin’s ”baby daddy” Levi Johnston. Not surprisingly, he disagrees with much of what Palin herself wrote. And clearly Johnston is not ready to relinquish the limelight. It’s a shame Bristol and Levi couldn’t work it out, the two of them certainly seem to deserve each other.
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According to a recent poll, 72 percent of Republicans and Republican-leaning independents do not want Sarah Palin to run for president. Funny, that’s about the same precentage of Democrats who do want her to run.
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The two UC Berkeley hikers, Josh Fattal and Shane Bauer, who were arrested while hiking and accused of espionage, were finally freed by Iran. Which is good news. But I have to keep wondering….all the places in the world to hike, maybe they could have chosen a trail that wasn’t near the border of a country that barely has relations with the U.S?
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“Clayton Kershaw established himself as a candidate for the NL CY Young award with his 20th win last night while he lowered his ERA to 2.27. But should his 2011 record have an asterisk? Five of those wins (and five earned runs allowed in 42 innings) were against the Giants.
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Okay, all these people complaining about facts like “The top 10% of earners in this country pay 70 % of the taxes, leave out facts like “The top 1% of earners make more than the bottom 50% combined.” It’s like saying “The Yankees pay the highest luxury tax in MLB, we should cut it to be fairer to them.”
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Facebook has become like the Chicago weather. Don’t like it, no problem. Wait five minutes and it will change.
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Facebook changed their site in a major way AGAIN last night. (And, alas, “improved” the UK English version this morning to eliminate that solution.) Who do they think they are? Netflix?
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Actual serious note at the end here below for a change:
In some situations I am a pro-death penalty Democrat. Troy Davis didn’t seem like one of those situations, though admittedly I only know what I have read recently. But in any case, if his execution happened during a GOP presidential debate there would probably be cheers from the audience. And that makes me sad.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: facebook jokes, football jokes, Levi Johnston book jokes, Palin jokes
Comments: 4 Comments
September 15, 2011
Target’s website crashed as a frenzy of shoppers tried to purchase the new “Missoni for Target” line. The response from millions of American women -“Target has Missoni?” The response from millions of American men -“Who the heck is Missoni and what team does he play for?
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The U.S. – Mexico border crossing between Tijuana and San Diego was closed Wednesday after scaffolding from construction at the crossing fell on more than a dozen cars. Well, that’s one way to keep out illegal immigrants – have our roads and infrastructure collapse to the point that no one can get in.
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Speaking of overload – GOP presidential candidate Rick Perry met with Donald Trump Wednesday night in New York. Were they discussing the Donald possibly being Perry’s running mate? Or just thinking of opening their own branch of “Hair Club for Men?”
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Commented my friend Alex Kaseberg on the Perry-Trump meeting: “They could both die from the crushing weight of their egos.”
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Now Michele Bachmann is talking about the HPV vaccine making girls “retarded.” Is that what happened to her?
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A new book coming out claims Sarah Palin had a very quick fling with Glen Rice when he was playing for Michigan. How quick? Apparently Sarah referred to it as a “Fab Five Minutes.”
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Sports and political words buzzing over the Palin-Rice fling. Well, at least we know Sarah never slept with Lebron James. They might flirt but neither of them would be likely to go all the way.
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The Sarah Palin-Glen Rice story, even it’s a nonstory, has even taken some media attention away from Rick Perry for a day. Not to say that the Texas Governor likes the limelight, but rumor has it Perry’s now got his staff looking for a female athlete who will admit to a one-nighter with him before HIS marriage.
(Note, it has to be a FEMALE athlete.)
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“Not exactly” award of the day: Tom Brady, talking to reporter about the Patriots home opener told fans to “start drinking early.” A Patriots spokesman later said Brady wanted to clarify his remarks, he just “wants everyone to drink a lot of water, stay hydrated.” Yeah, right.
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So what’s next for Glen Rice now that he’s been named as having had a fling with Sarah Palin back in the 1980s. Media interviews for sure, but how long until he nabs the big prize -a spot on “Dancing with the Stars?”
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A new option on Australian passports for gender allows applicants to choose between “M,” “F”, and X” options, the latter for people of ambiguous or transgender sexuality. Three gender options? That’s probably about two too few for San Francisco.
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On a non-sports, non-politics note, a little reminder that when things go wrong with travel that it could be worse. Had client just miss plane from Dulles to SF today because she was delayed in Washington. Ended up standby on a plane two hours later. And was at airport in time to see orginal flight return after an engine caught on fire….
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Bachmann vaccine jokes, Glen Rice jokes, Palin jokes, Palin-Rice jokes, Rick Perry jokes, Target jokes. Bachmann jokes
Comments: Be the first to comment
September 7, 2011
Chaz Bono is facing criticism as a “Dancing With the Stars” contestant from some who claim it’s not about the transgender issue, but about the fact that Chaz is only a “star” by virture of having famous parents.
Right, as opposed to being someone who earned their stardom by both having a famous parent and getting pregnant at 16.
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But let’s be real. Would any actual star (as opposed to “wants to be a star”, “used to be a star”, or “thinks being on reality tv made them a star”), actually have any interest in being on the show? Just asking.
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The Baltimore-New York game ended after 2a Wednesday morning at Yankee Stadium. No extra innings, just a four hour rain delay. It could have been worse – if there was a similar rain delay with a Red Sox-Yankees game, they’d be lucky to finish by daybreak.
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Meanwhile, the New York Mets-Florida Marlins game went to the 12th in South Florida. Anyone want to hazard a guess on how many dozen fans were left in the stands?
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Eddie Murphy is the host of next year’s Oscar telecast. Is he going to appear as his live or animated version?
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Carol Bartz is apparently out as CEO of Yahoo. This surprised many people in Silicon Valley, who based on results were unaware that anyone was actually running Yahoo.
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Regarding California’s Proposition 8, the now-overturned but soon-to-be-appealed anti gay marriage ban, I have one question: With all the major GOP presidential candidates running on platforms that are anti-government intrusion, how come not ONE of them has come out and said that legislating marriage like this is a waste of time and money?
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When Wolf Blitzer asked him about the Bush administration record, Dick Cheney responded “I’m not inclined to make any mea culpas.” And later the former V.P. returned George W.’s phone call to answer “what’s a mea culpa?”
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Ohio State had suspended four players for the team’s season opener against Akron for receiving impermissible benefits. But new coach Luke Fickell said all of them would be reinstated for this week’s home game against Toledo. Yep, the Buckeyes don’t want to be shorthanded when they start playing the tough teams.
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Every week in the NFL, teams release their injury lists. In the NCAA this year, will teams start releasing their “suspended, arrested and/or academically ineligible” lists?
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Sarah Palin apparently ran an half-marathon in Iowa this weekend. Of course Palin said she would have preferred to run a full marathon but that going halfway was better for the people of Iowa.
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For Canadian readers: U.S. college football national champions Auburn paid $950,000 to Utah State to play them, and then barely won 42-38, by scoring two touchdowns in the game’s last three minutes. Heck, for $950,000 Auburn could have paid for a far easier opponent, like the Toronto Argonauts.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: baseball jokes, Chaz Bono jokes, Cheney jokes, Dancing with the Stars jokes, Janice Hough, Palin jokes
Comments: 3 Comments
September 2, 2011
Hard to believe (in the U.S) it’s almost time for the first regular season professional football game of the year. And after LSU-Oregon Saturday night, the Saints-Packers kick off next Thursday.
Wisconsin 51, UNLV 17. Many fans who tuned into this opening night college football game were unaware UNLV had a D1 team. And after tonight, they’re still not sure.
Oxymoron containing sentence of the day: Sarah Palin is traveling to South Korea to speak at the “World Knowledge Forum” (Isn’t this like John Edwards speaking at a Marriage Forum?)
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Ohio State is struggling to regain their reputation after the football benefits scandal. But the university reported today that three more players received impermissible benefits of $300 or less this year. AFTER the suspensions and Tressel’s firing. Can’t imagine how football players get the reputation of being stupid.
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San Jose police are looking for people who grabbed bags of marijuana that spilled onto the road from a truck that crashed in south San Jose last night. Apparently the driver fled the crash, and bystanders grabbed all but a few bags. Have the police tried stakeouts in front of local shelves stocked with Doritos?
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Much controversy out there about Chaz Bono, as a transgender man, being on “Dancing With the Stars.” Because some believe it condones unacceptable behavior. Well, yeah, it’s a slippery slope. Next thing you know the show will be glorifying young women who have children out of wedlock.
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But really, all this controversy about Chaz Bono, and openly gay contestant Carson Kressley. Do these guys really offend both straight men who watch the show?
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Sarah Palin professes to be very excited about her first trip next month to South Korea. Apparently one of her favorite songs the one she knows as the Korean version of “Hail to the Chief” – “Seoul Man.”
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And the playground antics continue. President Obama changed the date of his planned jobs speech after Republicans complained that it conflicted with a planned GOP primary debate. A lot of commotion on behalf of Americans who wanted to hear the speech and see the the debate too. All three of them.
No one likes wasting money, so I understand why many in the GOP are upset by the failure of solar energy company, Solyndra, after a $535 million loan guarantee by the Energy Department. Of course, I would understand it more if those same Republicans had been complaining over the $1 trillion plus wasted on the Iraq war.
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from T.C. A human foot wearing a running shoe washed ashore in Vancouver this week. This is the 11th incident in BC since 2007. Photos are being sent to Rex Ryan for identification.
Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: Chaz Bono jokes, college football jokes, DWTS jokes, LSU jokes, Palin jokes
Comments: 2 Comments
Left Coast Sports Babe 