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Closing time?

December 9, 2015

The Phillies have traded their closer, Ken Giles, to the Astros. Well, at least this means Giles might actually start having some games to close.

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Trump is now taking on President Obama’s comment about Muslims-Americans being “our friends and our neighbors, our coworkers, our sports heroes”.

The Donald tweeted “What sport is he talking about, and who?” Well, leaving aside Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, for starters, Trump may also be proving that it’s not just boxers who behave as if they’ve been hit in the head one too many times. ‪#‎notthegreatest‬

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Carmelo Anthony now says he’s frustrated by a lack of calls from referees this season. But really, don’t all sentences involving Melo say he is frustrated about SOMETHING?

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Browns coach Mike Pettine said that “I imagine repercussions would be harsh” if QB Johnny Manziel has another off-field transgression.
It’s all part of the NFL and Cleveland’s “12 strikes and you’re out policy.”

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United Airlines says that in Feb. 2016, they will bringing back free snacks for economy passengers. And in Jan. 2016 presumably they will raise all fares $10-20?

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Angela Merkel has been named Time’s “Person of the Year.” Waiting for Donald Trump to complain about yet another American job going to a foreigner.

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Samsung apparently wants to get into the self-driving car business. Okay, some statements don’t even need an (un-PC) punchline.

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The latest report is that a man named Enrique Marquez, who was the one who purchased the assault rifles for the San Bernandino shooter “so his name wouldn’t be on file,” told friends at a party that “There’s a lot of Muslims in our own backyard, just ready to go haywire and attack.”
If true, this proves once again that while we may fear terrorism, we have as much to fear from ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia suggested that affirmation action means that African-American students are”being pushed into schools that are too advanced for them” and that “most of the black scientists in this country do not come from the most advanced schools.”
Wonder if Scalia’s views were shaped by the fact that fellow justice Clarence Thomas went to Yale.

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The accused Planned Parenthood shooter today in court shouted that he was a “warrior for the babies.” So since all the GOP candidates support police, who will be the first to declare a moratorium on pro-lifers entering the U.S.?

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In Austin, the University of Texas has told “Come and Take It Texas,” and “DontComply.com”, two gun-rights groups that they will not be allowed to go ahead with their plan for a mock mass murder, featuring fake guns and blood, on campus this weekend. The groups planned to use the event to demonstrate how much safer students would be with guns..
Right, because nothing says safety like a bunch of armed people who are stupid enough to think this was a good idea.

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But finally a serious question,  can we get bipartisan agreement from my pro and anti-gun friends on this proposal?   If you buy a gun for someone who would have issues getting it on their own, or if you give someone like that a gun, or if you are careless with your gun and someone uses it, accidentally or on purpose, to injure someone else, you are criminally liable as at least as an accessory.

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Take a bite out of this?

December 9, 2015

 

St. Petersburg Mayor Rick Kriseman says he is banning Donald Trump from his city “until we fully understand the dangerous threat posed by all Trumps.”
Not often do I say this but, “well played, Florida.”

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Now, back to the usual Sunshine State items:  A Florida burglary suspect who apparently was partially eaten by an alligator while trying to avoid police by hiding in a pond – the alligator ended up being euthanized by police. Really? Shouldn’t the gator have been rewarded for helping law enforcement?

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Think maybe we can convince George Zimmerman some kid wearing a hoodie is hiding in a Florida pond? ‪#‎gatorpower‬

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One of the quotes of the day: “This whole notion that somehow we need to say no more Muslims — and just ban a whole religion — goes against everything we stand for and believe in.” Another commie-pinko liberal railing against Donald Trump?
Actually, the quote is from Dick Cheney.

 

Another thought on Donald Trump’s idea to ban all Muslims entering the U.S. Uh, names don’t always indicate religion – my husband, for example has the last name Schwartz and was raised Catholic. And plenty of people convert. So what does the Donald propose? A Bible test at the border?

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Monday’s nonstop Air France flight bound from San Francisco to Paris on was diverted to Montreal because of a bomb threat that turned out to be a false alarm. The plane continued on to Paris in the morning.
So now passengers are focused on the important things – like “Do we get extra frequent flier miles for this?”

 

Good to see someone associated with the NCAA has a sense of humor. Football games between BYU and Utah are referred to as “The Holy War.” And this year the two teams are playing in the Royal Purple Bowl, played in Las Vegas.

Although to be fair, there’s a lot of praying over games in Vegas.

 

Douglas Tompkins, 72, who founded North Face clothing, died of hypothermia after his kayak capsized in southern Chile. So did Mother Nature finally decide to enact some karmic revenge on Tompkins for all the people his products kept protected from weather?

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ABC is remaking Dirty Dancing with a three-hour TV movie. Well, that ought to go about as well as the Sound of Music with Carrie Underwood. ‪#‎isnothingsacred‬?

 

In Fremont, California, police were called when an injured man climbed out of a garbage truck. Apparently he had fallen asleep in a trash bin and survived two compaction cycles. “Missed it by that much,” said Darwin

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So maybe it wasn’t all his immigrant wife’s fault: CNN is reporting that investigators now think the American-born San Bernandino shooter may have also planned a 2012 attack with someone else, but “got spooked” and abandoned it.

 

 

From Christopher Green, one of my friends up North – “Canada is already committed to 25,000 Syrian refugees in the next few months. I’m not sure that we’ll also be able to accommodate all the American refugees next November if Trump wins.”

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The $200 million dollar man.

December 5, 2015

Zack Greinke signed a 6 year, $206 million deal with the…. Arizona Diamondbacks? Well, maybe Greinke figured he would do better without all that post-season pressure.

 

#‎SFGiants‬ might have done just fine with Greinke deal: They don’t risk $200 million on a 32 yr-old pitcher & Zack’s no longer with the Dodgers.

 

 

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So Trump has backed down from his demand that CNN donate $5 million for him to participate in the next GOP debate. And the Donald expects us to think he can take on, China, Putin, ISIS….. he can’t even stand tough with a measly cable network.

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Aaron Hernandez has reportedly now been moved to a segregated unit at his maximum security prison, after he was found with a prison-made shank in his cell Thursday. You really do wonder how the former Gators/Patriots star has managed to stay alive to the age of 26. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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LSU’s AD said that the school had made “inquiries” about possible replacements for their football coach, but decided that Les Miles “was the right man for the job. Partial translation, “nobody we thought was better was interested.

 

A new report found that 1 in 4 U.S. bridges is “structurally deficient,” meaning some part of the bridge’s core structure needs repair or complete replacement. And the rest no doubt are in danger with a potential Chris Christie presidency.

 

#‎SFGiants‬ have signed ‪#‎JeffSamardzija‬ to a 5 yr deal. Too soon to tell but so far only really unhappy people have to be SF copy editors.

 

 

A Seattle policeman who pulled a 73 year-old man over for driving without headlights was going to let him off with a warning, when the officer saw the driver allegedly attempting to snort cocaine DURING THE TRAFFIC STOP. Your move, Florida. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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Budapest tour guide talks about history and says Hungary has alas chosen the wrong side in all wars. Points out that the country is now part of NATO. And she adds thus NATO cannot start any future wars – because with Hungary involved, they will lose

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From T.C.  “Kobe Bryant has announced that he will retire after this season. I wonder how much collectors will pay for his last “air ball””

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Turkey time

November 26, 2015

 

The travel advisory says to avoid crowds. What fun is that?

 

 

dragon

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So tomorrow is Black Friday.  When Americans who spent the day fighting with their relatives can use those newly honed skills to fight with their fellow shoppers over half-priced sweaters.

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Police issued a court summons to a Russian man who with his son flew a drone over the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade today, and the man is complaining ‘They thought I was a terrorist.”
Uh, considering the current climate, hope the summons includes a charge for criminal stupidity.

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So Johnny Manziel has now been demoted to third string after he not only was seen partying in a video, but lied to his coaches about when the video was shot. Manziel is doing for the reputed intelligence of quarterbacks what Ben Carson is doing for neurosurgeons.

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Washington has announced that CB Chris Culliver tore his ACL and will be out for the season, their 6th starter out for the year. Bummer. Makes it increasingly unlikely that the 4-6 Redskins will be the NFC East team that gets blown out in the first round of the playoffs.

 

So in honor of the day and their play today, should we temporarily rename them the Philadelphia Turkeys. ‪#‎Eagles‬ ‪#‎Lions‬

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No NBA games on Thanksgiving. The league did, however, give Americans a holiday turkey early with the 76ers game.

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There are rumors of Chip Kelly returning to college football. And he’s doing a great job of showing he can coach a CFB playoff level team.

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76ers rookie Jahlil Okafor apparently knocked a guy out in a street fight in Boston last night. Of course Okafor should know better. But hey, it might be the only win he can remember this year.

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A Portland hospital is apparently the first to offer nitrous oxide,aka laughing gas, as a pain medication during labor. Have to wonder, if they started doing this sooner, how much higher might the local birth rate be?

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Happy Thanksgiving , or belated Thanksgiving, to all my readers.  You are the reason I do this and I am very grateful.  Seriously.  Now back to snark.

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Geography and other challenges.

November 23, 2015

Ben Carson now says of his comment that New Jersey Arabs were celebrating 9-11, that he “was thinking of the Middle East, not New Jersey.”
Well, yeah, anyone could make that mistake. ‪#‎notreadyforprimetime‬

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New worldwide travel alert from the U.S State Dept. “U.S. citizens should exercise vigilance when in public places or using transportation. Be aware of immediate surroundings and avoid large crowds or crowed (sic) places.”
What about ravened places? ‪#‎Nevermore‬

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To be fair, I suppose it does make sense to issue a warning when we know there are dangerous and crazy people seeking power in a country. So who will be the first to issue an alert for the U.S. based on the GOP debates?

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The Nationals have caused a Twitter uproar by tweeting “Happy Birthday” to Jonathan Papelbon. Who right about now might be the only person in Washington, D.C. less popular than Congress.

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LSU may fire Les Miles after three consecutive losses have the Tigers 7-3, even though it will mean a multi-million dollar boyout. (Miles currently makes $4.4 million a year.) But it’s okay, I am sure they can make up the money with cutbacks in academics. ‪#‎priorities‬

 

Maybe Trent Baalke and Jed York might be interested in hiring Les Miles as a future 49ers coach. After dealing with SEC alums Miles is used to dealing with unrealistic expectations, and after dealing with LSU players, he’s familiar with semi-pro talent.

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Reportedly Robinson Cano wants to be traded because he is unhappy in Seattle after signing a $240 million contract in 2014, “I feel so sorry for him” said NOBODY.

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A USF professor says that those odd FB requests from random people all over the world might be potential internet hackers or identity thieves. Bummer, there goes my chance to be invited to a Nigerian royal wedding.

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Oops.American Airlines accidentally let a planeload of people arriving from Cancun exit JFK Airport without having their passports checked and going through customs. Providing again that sometimes terrorists are no match for good old-fashioned stupidity.

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Washington DE Jason Hatcher thinks calls might be going against his team because of their “Redskins” nickname. Really? But, I can understand why Hatcher’s upset – had a few calls gone the other way Sunday Washington might have only lost by 2-3 touchdowns.

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Now that the Packers solidly beat the Minnesota Vikings, maybe Green Bay fans will stop blaming Olivia Munn. Now they can just be mad at Aaron Rodgers for having all that talent, money AND an actress girlfriend.

 

Mike Tiroco after ‪#‎MNF‬ about the Patriots “that’s why they’re World Champions.” Uh, “World Champions”? Unlike the NBA, NHL and MLB, the NFL doesn’t even have a team in Canada.

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Business as usual

November 22, 2015

Statisticians everywhere would like to thank the Washington Redskins today for so beautifully illustrating for the lay person the concept of “regression to the mean.”

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Rob Ryan, on NFL Network, discussing his firing by the Saints: “Everything in New Orleans is being blamed on me, including Katrina,” Who knew it was possible to make brother Rex look like the classy one?

 

In the midst of a year with plenty of controversy over officiating, Roger Goodell says that the NFL is considering mixing and matching crews on a weekly basis to reduce inconsistencies. Well, it’s a shame the league doesn’t make enough money to hire full time officials.

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In Madison, Badgers fans were reportedly throwing snowballs at the team’s cheerleaders during their game against Northwestern. Can only imagine what fans were throwing at the refs, after two potential last-minute game-winning Wisconsin TD’s were overturned.

 

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, making a distinction between DFS  (like Draft Kings) and year long fantasy football – “We love people who are going to engage in the game and have fun with it. It’s not about making money. It’s about enjoying the game and enjoying the team, enjoying the players you pick.”
Wow, and Goodell said this with a straight face.

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Cal’s Jared Goff is projected as probably the first QB who will be taken in this year’s NFL draft. And as far as getting that top pick – the 49ers, Raiders and Chargers are doing their best to ensure Goff will probably stay in California.

 

Marco Rubio has released his first nationwide campaign ad, in which he says – “What happened in Paris could happen here. There is no middle ground.” Sigh. I guess we can kiss “shining city on the hill” and “kindler gentler nation” goodbye.

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Three flights in the US and Canada this week were diverted over suspicious behavior and bomb threats. Waiting to see which airline is the first to turn this heightened security into a new fee.

 

 

Anyone but me still a bit getting used to seeing the Cincinnati Bengals leading their division in anything but arrests? ‪

 

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Donald Trump retweeted a graphic showing crime statistics on killings of whites and blacks that was simply flat out wrong, for example, it said 81% of whiles are killed by blacks, when the FBI numbers are 15%, and that blacks killed by whites were 2%, when the numbers are 7%. But really, why should the Donald start caring about facts now?

 

Rush Limbaugh said on “Fox News Sunday” that Ben Carson was “probably not” qualified to be president. “Probably?”

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On United.com,  United Airlines has a “Thanksgiving Week” travel notice – “Please allow extra time at the airport.” Really? What was their first clue?

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T.C. Chong, with a bus-to-hell Thanksgiving week thought,  “Why are there no important shopping days named “Yellow Friday” or “Indian Friday” or “Caucasian Friday”?

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On a lighter note, how can you not love the Belgians?   http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/nov/22/national-emergency-belgians-respond-with-cats

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No stopping us now?

November 19, 2015

The Golden State Warriors look so good right now, starting to think the only thing that could derail the team is a player dating a Kardashian.

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Staples Center sounds like Petco Park when the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ visit. So who’s the home team? ‪#‎Warriors‬ ‪#‎Clippers‬

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Tony Romo says the Dallas Cowboys season “is not over.” But “you just have very little room for error.” Is Romo aiming to be an advisor to Jeb Bush’s presidential campaign?

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In Texas, education officials rejected a proposal to have university experts fact-check textbooks approved for use in public-school classrooms. So apparently not only ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬, in Texas you can’t educate students out of stupid either. ‪#‎factshavealiberalbias‬

 

So this weekend in college football features great match-ups like Ohio State-Michigan State, Cal-Stanford and Baylor-Oklahoma State. And then Alabama-Charleston Southern and Florida-Florida Atlantic? ‪#‎SECwimps‬

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The 2-7 Tennessee Titans vs the 3-6 Jacksonville Jaguars on Thursday Night Football. And if you cared and don’t live in Nashville or Florida, you might be spending too much time on fantasy football.

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So Tennessee-Jacksonville, and then in college football East Carolina vs 0-10 UCF. Wait a minute, I thought the Thanksgiving turkeys were NEXT Thursday.

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Kylie Jenner said that if Kim Kardashian and Kanye West moved in with her “I would seriously stab myself’.”
Now, there’s an episode Americans would tune in to see.

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A psychiatrist testifying for Jared Fogle said that the Subway diet led to his criminal behavior “Once he lost weight, it seemed as though in a short time he had hyper-sexuality. There are brain disorders that can be associated with sexual drive.”
I think I like “pushed into a lifeboat” better.

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From T.C.    “Justin Bieber is trying to put his past behind him by apologizing and acting more polished. To start, he will only bomb his neighbors houses with “cage free” eggs.”

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Reuters is reporting some contract workers at seven U.S. airports, who want better wages and to unionize, may go on strike next week. These aren’t airline employees, but employees of a company airlines subcontract with to save money. One worker says he cleans and checks plane interiors for suspicious objects at New York Kennedy for $10.10 an hour. What could POSSIBLY go wrong here?

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United Airlines is offering 50,000 Mileage Plus miles if you purchase a Mercedes-Benz. Uh, if you can afford the Mercedes, guessing you don’t need no stinkin’ miles.

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Donald Trump is the first GOP candidate to say he would be open to having a “Muslim database” in the US. Now a database of gun owners, that would be un-American. ‪#‎theonlythingwehavetofearisfearitself‬ ‪#‎feariswinning‬

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Rudy Giuliani is now saying that “‘ISIS Is an Obama c reation.If we had not taken our troops out of Iraq and Afghanistan, ISIS never would have emerged.” Shocking. That’s the most words I can remember Giuliani stringing together without including 9-11.

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ISIS has to be amused. All this effort they are expending in a war against their perceived enemies in Syria. It turns out all they needed to do was kill some Westerners and start dropping fake Syrian passports, and they could get many in the U.S. on their side.

 

 

 

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The lady might be really feeling green

November 17, 2015

 

Sadly ironic- “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free” is written on our most famous gift from France.

 

 

The Raiders’ Aldon Smith was reportedly shocked today when the NFL suspended him for a year for violating their substance abuse policy. This after the LB’s Aug 6 DUI arrest, his 5th arrest since 2012.
Guess Smith thought he still had some cap room under the league’s “10 strikes and you’re out” policy.

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On a brighter Bay Area note,  Brandon Crawford, home-grown, 6 years, $75 million, no-trade clause. Well-played, SF Giants, well-played.

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David Ortiz says he will retire after the 2016 season. Other teams are hoping Pablo Sandoval doesn’t say he will make the same decision – they couldn’t afford the farewell tour banquets.

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Bobby Jindal says he is dropping out of the 2016 Presidential race. The most upset people? Louisianans. Now for the remainder of his term, Jindal’s got no reason to leave the state.

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More Jindal ““I’ve come to the realization this is not my time.” Maybe he should have said “I’ve come to the realization that this is not my century?

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An Ohio woman pleaded guilty to aggravated assault after being accused of stabbing her boyfriend when he ate all the salsa. Really? Who stabs someone for eating salsa. Now, had he finished off all the chocolate, completely justifiable.

 

Donald Trump said today that with Syrian refugees, President Obama is sending “them to the Republicans, not to the Democrats, you know because they know the problem.” Guess the Donald thinks that Ben Carson has been making too many inroads lately into his “crazy” vote.

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Meanwhile, Chris Christie, saying he would not even allow Syrian orphans under five into the U.S. “You now, they have no family here. How are we going to care for these folks?” Again, three words, “pro-life my ass.

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Three men and a woman who appeared to be of middle easternt descent, and with several carry-on bags, were removed from a Spirit Airlines flight for “suspicious activity,” and are being questioned in Baltimore.
Well, makes sense, with all their fees, who’s crazy enough to bring several carry-on bags on Spirit Airlines?

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“What the United States has done is to be open to people who are fleeing tyranny, who are fleeing danger, but we have done it in a very careful way that has worked for us.” Yeah, just another commie pinko speaking out. Wait, this was Condoleeza Rice, saying she hopes the U.S. will be “open and welcoming” to refugees. Never mind.

 

Turtle experts in Marin have confirmed the sighting of a rare green sea turtle from Mexico in California’s San Joaquin river, possibly lured by warmer El Nino waters. So will Trump be railing against the immigrant turtle? At least he (or she) really is a wetback.

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American Airlines has announced they are “evolving to build a rewarding (AAdvantage) program for all members, while giving our best customers access to our most exclusive benefits.” Translation, we’re going to start making sure our free tickets and upgrades mostly go to those who could afford to pay for them anyway.

 

 

 

Wow. Just wow. This from conservative commentator Ben Stein about President Obama “I don’t think there’s much question that he does not wish America well. He has a real strong hatred of America”
So are any of the GOP candidates going to have a John McCain moment and say, “Enough?”
Heaven knows I and other liberals wanted Bush out of office, but can’t remember a liberal commentator ever saying that he hated his own country. ‪#‎overtheline‬

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And finally, really?   Channel 2 in the SF Bay Area did a story on the risks of Americans studying abroad, focusing on the death of the young California woman in Paris. And exactly how many students have been killed this year on US campuses?
Heck, for that matter, leaving crime aside, six Irish students died this year in a Berkeley balcony collapse. ‪#‎nosuchthingascompletesafety‬ ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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More solid for solidarity?

November 16, 2015

Forget diets. Maybe it’s time to show our solidarity with Paris by eating french fries? Lots of french fries.

 

The 1972 Miami Dolphins would have popped champagne tonight if they had actually realized the Bengals had still been undefeated.

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The Indianapolis Colts, at 4-5 and 1-4 outside their division, are in line to host an NFL playoff game. Even NBA teams are thinking that’s crazy.

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New prime minister Justin Trudeau has issued a directive to Canada’s justice minister to “create a federal-provincial-territorial process that will lead to the legalization and regulation of marijuana.”
Is there any way we can do a trade with our neighbors to the north. We want Trudeau, and we’ll send them Justin Bieber AND Ted Cruz?

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The Dallas Cowboys, who signed Greg Hardy in the off-season despite him being unrepentant about a domestic violence conviction, are tied for the fewest victories in the NFL. Three words to that mean bitch Karma “You go girl!”

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So what happens in these Red States if the Syrian refugees start saying they are fleeing Europe because of draconian gun regulations?

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Michigan, Alabama, Texas, Arkansas, Louisiana, Indiana and Illinois have all said now they won’t accept Syrian refugees. Because in those states, Americans already do a good enough job of killing each other?

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President Obama has just ordered U.S. flags flown at half-staff until Thursday at sunset. Waiting for the GOP Presidential candidates to tell us why this is wrong.

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I understand the urge to do something, anything, after senseless killings. But why are the same people who are demanding immediate changes after all the deaths in Paris so completely laissez-faire about mass shootings here in the U.S?

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Open note to those saying now U.S. should only take Christian Syrian refugees. Uh, how exactly do you prove someone is or isn’t Christian?

 

To be fair, USA should know dangers of allowing foreign refugees. Had we just refused Cubans entry in 50s we wouldn’t have ‪#‎TedCruz‬ & ‪#Marco‎Rubio‬

 

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Really, Bobby Jindal says he wants to refuse Syrian refugees? Stupid. Just send them all to New Orleans, a city with a well-deserved reputation for corrupting the devout. Give even potential terrorists a few weeks and they’ll be down in the French Quarter wearing beads and praying for Allah to help the Saints.

 

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If you need any more proof of what a mess American politics has become, I give you this quote from John Boehner, talking about having to sneak into meetings with Obama. “Because if I went to the White House to see the president, the right would get all worked up, wondering what I was up to. The left gets all worked up, wondering what the president is up to. ‘What are these two going to do now?”

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Sarah Palin, saying she “can’t wait” for her daughter Bristol to have her second baby, expressing “enormous admiration” for single parents, and adding “the cool thing about putting your faith in God, is he certainly is a God of second chances and third and fourth and fifth chances.”
So exactly how many out-of-wedlock children is Bristol going to have?

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Americans have notoriously short attention spans. But even so, hope the horrific events in Paris don’t get knocked from the front page by Charlie Sheen’s HIV status.

 

 

There is precedent for the sort of xenophobia we’re getting from some Americans today. Why when the IRA was doing horrible things to British civilians for decades U.S. naturally stopped immigration from Ireland…. Oh wait, never, mind.

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From T.C.  “Justin Bieber is trying to put his past behind him by apologizing and acting more polished. To start, he will only bomb his neighbors houses with “cage free” eggs.”

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Shout outs

November 16, 2015

Aaron Rodgers, calling out a fan who yelled an anti-Musim slur today at Lambeau Field. “I must admit, I was very disappointed with whoever the fan was that made a comment that was very inappropriate during the moment of silence. It’s that kind of prejudicial ideology that puts us in the position we are today as a world.”
So how often do I say about a Cal grad, well played sir, well, played.”
(even if the game wasn’t)

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The way this season is going, the ones who will be yelling “Dallas sucks” loudest are Cowboys fans.
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It’s a new trend for pro teams to sell game used jerseys. Alas Saints can’t do that today for defensive players. No proof they were used.

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Can only imagine what kind of stats Drew Brees could put up if he could play against his own defense.
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Crazy week in the NFL. Have to wonder, have Aaron Rodgers, Drew Brees and Peyton Manning ever had a worse Sunday?
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Interesting how when SEC team beat each other up in college football it is looked upon as a sign of conference strength, whereas when Pac 12 teams beat each other it is looked upon as a sign of conference mediocrity.
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United sent frequent fliers a message saying that for a week you can “share your miles with friends and family and save up to 30% on the transfer price per mile. So let me get this straight, you earn the miles, and they for a short time they will graciously charge you less to give them away. And airlines wonder why we hate them.
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Bernie Sanders said last night that the US had more wealth inequality “than any major country on earth.” And actually,the 2015 Global Wealth Databook puts the share of wealth held by the top 1% in the U.S. puts us “only” 11th out of 37 nations – behind Russia, Thailand, Indonesia, India, Brazil, Chile, South Africa, China, Czech Republic and Israel.
But note the countries missing. So much for our decrying the European class system.

GOP candidates often act like it were a simple thing just to bomb the bad guys out of existence. Yeah, that idea worked so well after 9 11. ‪#‎assumingweevencanaimattherightbadguys‬

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Proving that no one party has a monopoly on stupidity. Dan Kimmel, a Democrat who was running for state representative in Minnesota tweeted ” ISIS isn’t necessarily evil. It is made up of people doing what they think is best for their community. Violence is not the answer, though.”
He dropped out of the race today and said the tweet was poorly worded. Ya think? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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From Bill Littlejohn, “Quarterback Blake Bortles says that his Jacksonville Jaguars are a ‘small step’ from contending. Well, remember, it took a decade and billions of dollars for Neil Armstrong’s ‘small step.’ ” .

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Arms race

November 15, 2015

Well, that didn’t take long. Donald Trump says yesterday’s attacks in Paris would have been “a much, much different situation” had the victims been armed, Right. Because when a few civilians pulled out their guns and started shooting at perceived bad guys and others got confused and started shooting at them…. Yeah, it would have been different. A lot more deaths. Especially since all the attack sites served alcohol.

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And so if Trump wants everyone armed. Would he ban alcohol at restaurants/bars etc. Or does he trust drunks with guns? ‪
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Meanwhile, the NFL says they will increase security this weekend at games. Let’s see, they already have metal detectors and you are only allowed clear plastic bags instead of purses? What else are they going to do? At least it’s a jobs program.
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Thinking lots of people screaming now about the US Constitution are same ones who scream about the Bible – and they haven’t read either one.
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For all the “close the borders permanently” folks: Yes, a Syrian passport was found on one of the Paris attackers, and it might have been faked  – but at least terrorist was a French national and some are reportedly from Belgium. And alas, we cannot close the Internet. ‪#‎itsnotthateasy‬
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We can thank college football for distraction today, as J.T.Barrlett is leading OSU over Illinois. Dashcam footage of his DUI arrest has emerged, in which Barrett asks police, “I’m the quarterback of Ohio State. C’mon man. Officer, there’s nothing you can do?”
Sounds like it should have been more a statement than a question.
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So the IAAF, track and field’s governing body has provisionally suspended Russia from all international competition, including the 2016 Olympics, over alleged doping. President Sebastian Coe – “This has been a shameful wake-up call, and we are clear that cheating at any level will not be tolerated.”

There’s cheating in track and field now? I’m shocked, shocked

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Ohio State beat Illinois 28-3. If Urban Meyer knew it was going to be this easy he might have suspended J.T. Barrett for a whole two games.

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So with all the complicated plays at Stanford’s disposal you’d think they’d still find time to work on the center to the quarterback snap?

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In the 2009 Big Game, 2012 Fiesta Bowl, and today, ‪#‎Stanford‬ had a Heisman hopeful, and a game come down to a last play – Gerhart, Luck,McCaffery. And Harbaugh and now Shaw twice didn’t put it in that star’s hands. ‪#‎notbitter‬ ‪#‎moreimportantissues‬ ‪#‎stillcranky‬

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So now that the glamour gal lost will we all go back to not caring about women’s UFC?  ‪#‎RondaRousey‬ ‪

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TC points out that Greg Hardy had a ringside seat to the Holm-Rousey match. Well, Rousey couldn’t beat Holm but it’s a same she didn’t get a consolation round match against Hardy.

The awful Paris attacks had to be coordinated carefully for a period of time. Forget the gun issue for a minute. There’s been a lot of talk about Europe giving Edward Snowden asylum. Wonder how Europeans feel today about government surveillance of citizens.
And yes, I’m a liberal, and yes I think Snowden is a traitor.

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Vive la France.

November 14, 2015

Maybe it’s time to retire all those French surrender jokes.  Paris tonight.

paris

For Paris. For all who have lost loved ones, and for so many sadly, now living in the stars tonight. “Quand tu regarderas le ciel, la nuit, puisque j’habiterai dans l’une d’elles, puisque je rirai dans l’une d’elles, alors ce sera pour toi comme si riaient toutes les étoiles. (Le Petit Prince)

(translation from the English version –  “You alone will have stars as no one else has them… In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars will be laughing when you look at the sky at night..”)

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While in general I don’t like to think about the concept of hell, nights like tonight in Paris make me really hope there is one, and that those responsible for the attacks are on the REAL express bus to it.

The first ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ after a terrible night in Paris goes to Rob Lowe, who tweeted “Oh, NOW France closes its borders.” You’d think he’d have learned something on West Wing.
And we don’t know yet about these horrible killers. But Jihadi John was a BRITISH citizen.

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And then there’s Newt Gingrich: “Imagine a theater with 10 or 15 citizens with concealed carry permits. We live in an age when evil men have to be killed by good people.” Right, with over 1,000 people, many of them who now doubt had been drinking, none of them really prepared, in a darkened theater……‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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Ben Carson of course has a response to Paris figured out, he would be working with our allies using “economic resources, covert resources… military resources… things-that-they-don’t-know-about resources… not to contain them, but to eliminate them, before they eliminate us,”

Right, because Carson is an expert on things he doesn’t know about.

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On a positive note on a rough day – A judge has at least temporarily reversed his decision to take a Utah baby who had been ordered taken from her lesbian foster parents. This after efforts by the state’s child welfare agency and considerable public outrage. Public outrage on behalf of a gay couple?! . In Utah?!. ‪#‎progress‬ ‪#‎Babysteps‬

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Donald Trump, asked why Hillary Clinton appeals to voters, commented “She has a new hairdo. ….it was massive. Her hair became massive,” .
The Donald better be careful, forget alienating voters, he might insult that furry thing that lives on his head.

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A new study found that mosquitoes are repelled by Victoria’s Secret Bombshell perfume. And put enough perfume on you can repel unwanted friends, relatives, coworkers too.

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Cowboys coach Jason Garrett says Dez Bryant should have handled Thursday’s tirade directed at the media differently. but “I believe that 100 percent of our guys do things the right way about 98 percent of the time.” Did they legalize marijuana in Dallas and not tell us?.

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DraftKings and FanDuel filed lawsuits to try to stop New York from banning the daily fantasy games. Forget the NFL, can we bet on what side will win.

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Apparently some in the GOP are trying to draft Romney to run in 2016. (he’s still saying no.)
Isn’t this kind of like being on the dating market, not finding anyone great, and then looking nostalgically back at your ex – forgetting of course why you didn’t want to be with them in the first place.

At times like this we do need some completely ridiculous moments of levity.   So if you’re reading this and it’s not too late, in college football 0-9 Kansas is playing #15 TCU Saturday.

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T’is the season.

November 13, 2015

Apparently in Thursday night’s NFL game colorblind viewers couldn’t distinguish between the Buffalo Bills’ red uniforms & the NY Jets’ green uniforms. Worse yet, neither team’s uniforms featured Christmas symbols Where’s the protest from Christians?

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If ‪#‎Starbucks‬ had just put out a plain holiday cup where people couldn’t decide what color it was they would have really broken the Internet.

Johnny Manziel, struggling with the Browns, is saying now he can’t see down the field because of his stature. And somewhere Drew Brees is just giggling.

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A new police report says Heat guard Gerald Green, who was mysteriously suspended 2 games for “conduct detrimental to the team” apparently punched a man last week in Miami and was so combative that he needed to be handcuffed to be taken for medical help.
Is this just a blatant attempt by the NBA to steal headlines from the NFL?

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Madison Bumgarner won another Silver Slugger award as the best hitting pitcher in baseball. Madbum is beginning to be to this award as Meryl Streep is to the Oscars.

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Apparently Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s new “By the Sea” movie is likely to be a flop. “I feel so sorry for them both, what will they fall back on?” said nobody.

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National Geographic is reporting “cougars are spreading back East after being confined to Western states for almost a century.” So maybe all the single rich geeky young men these days aren’t confined to California.

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A councilman who oversaw the removal of public toilets in his town has been cited by police, for urinating in the street. Nope, not Florida. Scotland.

In 2014, the Department of Veterans Affairs apparently gave executives and other employees over $142 million in bonuses, despite scandals and allegations of mismanagement. So who says government can’t compete with the private sector?

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Facebook, trying to compete with Snapchat, is experimenting with messages that will supposedly disappear after an hour. And if you believe they will COMPLETELY disappear, then you’re too stupid to think of a future run for office.

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A member of the Secret Service has been charged trying to solicit a 14-year-old-girl on-line.(Turns out he was texting and email an undercover officer.) Makes you long for those innocent days when the Secret Service was just soliciting prostitutes.

Walter Palmer, the dentist who shot Cecil the lion, is now under investigation in Minnesota for illegal hunting activity. allegedly ‘herding deer back onto his land.” Can’t we take up a collection for this guy to go hunting with Dick Cheney?

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The Chinese billionaire who bought the 12.03 carat “Blue Moon” diamond for $48.4 million, reportedly purchased it for his daughter, Josephine, age 7. Well, at least we know he has enough money for his daughter also to have years of therapy

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The ISIS executioner known as Jihadi John has reportedly been ‘evaporated’ by a US drone strike; ‘killed in a flawless clean hit’ in Ragga, Syria. Can we blame Obama?

Donald Trump, slamming Ben Carson, and his rise in the Iowan polls = “How stupid are the people of Iowa? How stupid are the people of the country to believe this crap?”
Well.., maybe not stupid enough to vote for Trump?

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Mother of Invention?

November 11, 2015

An Arkansas woman has been charged with child endangement when her baby ended up in the hospital with a blood alcohol level of .19%. She allegedly told police that her mother had suggested rubbing alcohol on his gums for teething pain, so she put bourbon in his bottle. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎yourmoveFlorida‬ ‪#‎andthesepeoplecanVOTE‬

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Walmart workers are trying to get the chain to extend the general merchandise 10% employee discount to food. Walmart is no doubt countering with “Are you kidding? On our wages you already get a discount through food stamps..

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On Veteran’s Day it’s so nice to see all the GOP candidates who want to expand our military also talk about how we need to pour money into more veterans’ healthcare and other services. ‪#‎sarcasm‬

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The end of a San Francisco era. Carol Doda, 78, has passed away after a long illness. Maybe her next of kin had time to order a special (double) bubble top coffin?

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Bob Dole has just endorsed Jeb Bush for President. How sad. Didn’t realize that Senator Dole was suffering from dementia.

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Joe’s Crab Shack is eliminating tipping at their 113 restaurants, and upping their minimum wage from $2.13 for waitstaff to $14 an hour. That stampeding sound you probably hear is all Joe’s really good waiters and waitresses heading to jobs at other restaurants.

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Okay, after all Marco Rubio’s criticism of liberal arts- apparently he’s been slamming philosophers for months, what’s HIS undergraduate degree from Florida? A Bachelor of Arts in Political Science.

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Marco Rubio says we need more welders and less (sic) philosophers. With Rubio and his fellow candidates’ general world views I can understand why they’re against philosophy – the philosophy course I took at Stanford was “Principles of Logic.”

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A Tempe city councilman, who said he had recent back surgery, and who presumably took advantage of an free sideline football pass, is now suing Arizona State claiming the school mascot jumped on him and injured his back.
‪#‎ifonlyhewerearmed‬

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A Bloomingdale’s holiday catalog featured a picture of a man looking a a laughing woman with the “spike your best friend’s eggnog when they’re not looking.” What’s next, will the store decide their new holiday spokesman will be Bill Cosby?

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Donald Trump, defending his plan to deport 11 millions illegals and arguing with John Kasich, said “I built an unbelievable company worth billions and billions of dollars,” so “I don’t have to listen to this man.”
Have to wonder, in building and maintaining that “unbelievable company,” how many of those Trump has employed are illegals?

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Wow, just wow. So last week, pictures were released of Greg Hardy’s ex-girlfriend, covered in bruises. And this week Hardy briefly changed his Twitter handle to “Perfection,” and his bio “Innocent until proven guilty-lack of knowledge & information is just ignorance-the unjust/prejudicial treatment of diff categories of people is discrimination.”
Too soon to start a pool on Hardy’s next arrest?
‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎cantfixbeinganasshole‬

‎Donald  Trump‬ wants to deport 11 million people and have immigrants in future only arrive for legal reasons, like marrying rich older men.

Drudge Report founder Matt Drudge apparently asked on Twitter “Can we talk about Hillary’s wig?’ For all those who thought we couldn’t go any lower than the Starbucks cup controversy….

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I wanna be sedated/debated…..

November 11, 2015

So I’m confused, after this ‪#‎GOPDebate‬ how many of the remaining contestants get roses?

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Four years ago, Rick Perry couldn’t remember the third Cabinet level department he wanted to eliminate. Tonight Ted Cruz said he wanted to eliminate five, and said the Dept of Commerce twice, while leaving out the Dept of Education. Makes some sense on education, Cruz certainly doesn’t seem to have benefited from it.

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Ted Cruz keeps telling voters to go to TedCruz.org. Because the man who wants us to trust him to lead the free world wasn’t smart enough to grab the TedCruz.com domain. ‪#‎Googleit‬ ‪#‎notreadyforprimetime‬

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So what does ‪#‎TedCruz‬ have against philosophers? Did he used to date one or something? ‪#‎GOPdebate‬

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In his first answer, Marco Rubio said to fix economy we need to repeal Obamacare. So congrats to all those who had “5 min. into the GOP debate in the pool.

Trump. “We are a country of laws”and we have to depart 11 million people. Then for example fruit will obey the laws and pick itself

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All these GOP candidates blame Obama & regulatory reform for U.S. economic woes. So why wasn’t the economy booming under Bush? ‪#‎GOPDebate‬
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 So let me get this straight, contestants in ‪#‎GOPDebate‬ all say regulations are big problem for US economy, but they want to regulate banks.

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#‎CarlyFiorina‬ keeps talking about how many of these world leaders she knows. Is this a ‪#‎GOPdebate‬ or a competition for Facebook friends?

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Carly Fiorina also dissing government and talking about “people who don’t do their jobs very well.” Well she should know ‪#‎HP‬ ‪#‎yourefired‬

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Ted Cruz is so out of touch he thinks wages in journalism can go any lower. ‪#‎GOPDebate‬

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Ben Carson says he has a problem with “being lied about.” And apparently with not ending sentences with propositions.-

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Congrats to ‪#‎SFGiants‬ Brandon Crawford for winning his 1st Gold Glove, and to Yadier Molina for winning his 8th. Think they just might want to make it automatic for the Cardinals’ catcher until he retires.

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Target is being accused now of trivializing mental illness because they are selling a OCD (‘Obsessive Christmas Disorder’) holiday sweater. Beginning to think the real epidemic in this country is OPCD (“Obsessive Politically Correct Disorder.”)

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Facebook wants us to give them our phone numbers to “help secure your account and more.” Yeah, it’s the “and more,” that worries me.

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Oakland LB Ray-Ray Armstrong is being investigated in PA for allegedly taunting a police dog at Heinz Field – pounding on his chest and barking at the animal before the Raiders-Steelers game.
Uh, not sure about charges being filed but if Armstrong thinks it’s a good idea to taunt and anger a K-9, guessing the problem is going to work itself. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎Darwinwannabe‬

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Non-profit investigative journalism site ProPublica has released a list of members of Congress who have missed a tenth or more of eligible floor votes since 2007. Hmm, maybe it’s time to start drug-testing our representatives.

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Ohio State QB J.T. Barrett today did plead guilty to DUI. He will pay a $400 fine and have his license suspended for six months. With all due respect, since Barrett has NFL aspirations, maybe he should learn to live without driving these days, period.

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Urban Meyer has reinstated J.T. Barrett as OSU’s starting QB for this weekend’s game against Illinois, after a one-game suspension for DUI. “It’s never easy. I think it’s the right thing at this time.” Translation, the Fighting Illini might be a tougher competitor than most people think.

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Campbell’s says they are changing their chicken soup recipe to have fewer ingredients. Will one of them still be chicken?

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Pastor Kevin Swanson, upset with Dumbledore being homosexual, says that rather than have kids read the Harry Potter books, for “tens of millions of parents it would be better that a millstone be hung around their (children’s) neck and they be drowned at the bottom of the sea.”
And Swanson said this at the National Religious Liberties Conference. ‪#‎oxymoron‬ ‪#‎jesuswept‬

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An alligator was seen eating a python on a Florida golf course. If only the python had been armed.

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You had one job.

November 10, 2015

The cover of the Washington Nationals 2016 calendar.  For the uninitiated, or merely nearsighted, yes, that is the Green Monster, and yes, that IS Fenway Park, (Boston.)

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park

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Regarding that Starbucks “no snowflakes on the Christmas cups” controversy. Uh, have any of those complaining actually checked the average weather in Bethlehem in December, or indeed any time in “winter?” There’s a reason those nativity scenes don’t have anyone including baby Jesus bundled up in a coat.

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Donald Trump, jumping into the Starbucks fray. says “maybe we should boycott” the coffee chain. But added “if I become president, we’re all going to be saying, ‘Merry Christmas’ again. That I can tell you.”
Trump doesn’t even need to become President, if he just gets the 2016 nomination Hillary will be saying “Merry Christmas, and thank you Santa Claus.”

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So when are we going to hear from the Jews that Starbucks not having an option of blue cups is disrespecting Hanukkah?

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We interrupt the Starbucks cups and Pyramid/grain silos stories to bring you breaking political news. In response to a NY Times poll that has gone viral, Jeb Bush said “Hell yes, I would” kill baby Hitler….. ‪#‎beammeupScottiethereisnointelligentlifeonthisplanet‬

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After the football team refused to play over “systemic” racism on campus, and the president’s handling of that racism, Tim Wolfe, the Univ. of Missouri president finally resigned this morning. Makes sense. Racism is serious. But football is REALLY serious.

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Had to love it today.   Twitter knew security checkpoints at ‪#‎MIAAirport‬ were closed, ‪#‎AmericanAirlines‬ phone agents didn’t know, & it was THEIR planes.   Then their phone agents say “tell passengers to go talk to airport agents.”   Right. Both of the human agents left at airport could handle thousands of stuck people.

(the post security gate agents, as it turned out,  were sent out to mill around in the pre-security area with passengers…..where they were apparently equally clueless.  #tryingtomakeUnitedAirlines look good?)

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An Ohio man with a blood alcohol level of .30 was arrested after he got a 9-year-old boy to drive him to get some barbecue sauce. (Store officials interceded and wouldn’t let the boy drive home.) Not sure on the guy’s bail and final charges, but I do see a major endorsement opportunity ahead. ‪#‎howmuchdoyouloveoursauce‬?

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Reggie Bush is suing the city of St. Louis after he injured himself slipping on the concrete sideline during 49ers-Rams game Nov 1. Wonder if St. Louis will try to get the suit thrown out -under the grounds that Bush has no personal regard for his own well being as evidenced by him having dated a Kardashian.

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So now “One Million Moms” is protesting American Girl Magazine for feature a family with four adopted children and gay fathers. Three words: “Pro-life my ass.”

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The Carolina Panthers say they will replace an expensive banner that a Packers fan brought to yesterday’s game saying “Carolina Cheesehead,” this after Cam Newton tore the thing down and took it. Well, good to see the NFL can move quickly when it’s important violence against banners.

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Bob Gibson turned 80 today. Wonder if he celebrated by brushing his grandchildren off the cake plate.

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Up in arms?

November 7, 2015

So it’s headline news because “dozens of demonstrators in NYC are protesting NBC’s decision to allow Donald Trump to host SNL? “Dozens?” In California you can get more protesters in most towns over adding a single extra bike lane.

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Donald Trump says he has nixed some of the more “risque” skits tonight in SNL because he wants to stay ahead in Iowa. So the state and their “family values” matters that much to him? What next, will the Donald get a couple of his wives to campaign for him there?

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Ben Carson “Without Fox News we’d be Cuba.” Waiting for his first fellow GOP candidate to say “Well, without the cigars.”

Waiting for today’s crazy statement and thinking  – maybe Ben Carson is just really tired of running for President?

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In Australia, paramedics reportedly no longer ask patients who the prime minister is, because since not enough people know the question doesn’t work for an accurate assessment of patients.
Well, in the U.S. they probably already know not to ask the name of say, the Vice President or a state’s senators.

(or in some states,” how many fingers do you see?”)

Charlie Hebdo is now being criticized by Russia and others for cartoons about the crash of the Russian plane in Egypt. Uh, yeah, it’s a tasteless thing to joke about – tasteless is what Charlie Hebdo does. They are surprised why?

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Ben Zobrist just named his new baby girl “Blaise Royal.” Hmm, probably a good idea Zobrist didn’t get traded to the Mets, Dodgers or Giants.

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For your weekend, or next weekend’s  – tailgating edification  – the quote of the day -“the benefits arising from the moderate use of strong Liquor have been experienced by all armies, and are not to be disputed.” General George Washington

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Students at an off-campus apartment near the University of Alabama have hung a banner before today’s game with LSU. “Finish What Katrina Started.” ‪#‎stayclassy‬

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Kobe Bryant, 37, says he is never playing for another team “I’m a Laker for life/” Well, at this point, as if any other team would want him.

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Your warm and fuzzy story for the day. Three SFO security screeners were arrested on charges of defrauding the government and smuggling cocaine, allegedly allowing “certain passengers with narcotics in their carry-ons to pass through the X-ray machine without checking for security threats like explosives or weapons.
All three workers were contract workers of a private company named Covenant Aviation Security that contracts with TSA to provide screeners. But hey, they reduce costs. ‪#‎whatcouldpossiblygowrong‬?

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Visiting the east coast, staying up out of curiosity to see Trump on SNL,… It’s almost time for the show to start, and the AZ-USC game is heading to the 2nd quarter.  And we wonder why Pac 12 teams get no love/respect?

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From Bill Littlejohn: “Vernon Davis was traded by the 49ers to the Broncos.That must be like going from being dumped by Lindsay Lohan and rebounding with Jennifer Lawrence.”

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Sins of the mothers and fathers?

November 6, 2015

The Mormon church is now saying that gay couples can be kicked out, and their children can no longer receive blessings as infants, be baptized, or serve missions, unless the kids disavow the practice of same-sex relationships, or turn 18 and no longer live with their gay parents.
So the only way you can have two mommies is if both of them are married to your daddy?

Does anyone doubt that if Greg Hardy had a real job instead of playing for the NFL, that he’d be in jail now?

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C.C. Sabathia says now he was “probably still drunk” during some of the Yankees’ last regular season games. Big deal. Youngsters, google Dock Ellis.

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Donovan McNabb was sentenced to 18 days in jail for an “Extreme DUI,” his second DUI arrest in two years. What’s ‘Extreme DUI?” Well, partly it was that he was more than two times over the limit, partly it’s that as a retired NFL player you lose the “Get out of jail free” card.

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Johnny Manziel says he “absolutely” wants to keep the Browns’ starting QB job. You know who else wants him to keep the starting job? Cleveland fans dreaming of the #1 draft pick.

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Ben Carson “So, you know, I would say to the people of America — do you think I’m a pathological liar… Or do you think I’m an honest person? But hey, given resigned American attitudes toward politicians, maybe he’d be better off saying “You say I’m a pathological liar like it’s a bad thing.”

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Jeb Bush has now had to apologize to French officials for criticizing Marco Rubio for missing Senate votes and saying “What is it, like a French workweek?”
But to be fair, it’s not like Jeb has spent much of his life in the public eye. ‪#‎SMH‬ ‪#‎sarcasm‬ ‪#‎notreadyforprimetime‬

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With many districts In California now exposing the biggest water hogs, the drought equivalent excuse to sport’s”tainted supplement” is now a “leaky pipe.”

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In California, warmer than usual Pacific Ocean waters have contributed to a toxic algae bloom that has delayed and might even cancel Dungeness Crab season. No crab? This is the kind of thing that might get even California Republicans on board to fight global warming.

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Thursday in Britain was Guy Fawkes Day. Where the country lights bonfires and celebrates a failed plot to blow up the House of Lords in Parliament – basically their Senate. In the U.S. we don’t need anyone to try to destroy the Senate, we have Ted Cruz.

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So USA Today is reporting that Leonard Fournette’s family may have broken NCAA rules by trying to set up an online business selling T-shirts and hats with a BUGA acronym Fournette had helped develop in high school.
If the allegations are true that could mean sanctions against LSU – said absolutely nobody. ‪#‎SECteamsareneverwrong‬

The Rockefeller Center Christmas tree was put into place Friday in New York, where the temperature was 75 degrees. Maybe instead of a Norwegian spruce they should have ordered a palm tree?

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Different worlds.

November 5, 2015

An astrophysicist at Caltech says he may have found evidence of alternate or parallel universes. Yeah, Americans already knew that. One is inhabited by Democrats, the other by Republicans.

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Cincinnati is 8-0. Who’d a thunk the Bengals would lead the NFL in any category but arrests?

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The National Geographic Society, which was just sold to Rupert Murdoch, announced they will lay off about 180 of its 2,000 employees. Including several people in the fact-checking department. Well, right, I mean, with a Murdoch company, who needs a fact-checking department?

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Former President George H.W. Bush, 91, criticized Rumsfeld and Cheney in his new book. Well, he did only serve one term, is George Sr. trying to prove HE”s the Bush we should send back to the White House?
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The Guardian is reporting that in London, historically one of the world’s most expensive cities, people were camping out overnight for a chance to buy new affordable flats starting at £199,000. (a little more than $300,000.)
Overnight? For those prices in SF people would camp out for a month .

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The NY Post reported that an Apache Indian leader who has been speaking out against the Redskins name, posted a picture of himself dressed up as Bob Marley in blackface for Halloween.
Sigh. Once again, proof that no race has a monopoly on hypocrisy.

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The Detroit Lions have fired their President and GM, and owner Martha Ford said “we want to make it clear that we have no intention of giving up on the season. We expect our team to compete and improve and win.”
Did they legalize marijuana in Michigan and not tell us?

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Ok, so qualifying for the next GOP debate on Fox Business Network are Trump, Carson, Rubio, Cruz, Bush, Fiorina, Kasich and Paul.   Apparently I was mistaken, thought the prime-time debate was reserved for only the candidates who could actually win.

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Carly Fiorina: “GOP is a conservative party. Conservative voters will pick our nominee. The conservative networks should host our debates! ” Maybe nobody told Carly that after the primaries there’s actually a general election?

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Warriors owner Joe Lacob now says that he and his fiancée slept with the NBA championship trophy in their Cleveland hotel room. “I had made a promise to myselI would sleep with the trophy that night. Nicole and I did sleep with it. I’ll leave it to the imagination. We had a lot of fun with it.” ‪#‎TMI‬ ‪#‎classnothingbutclass‬

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George Barris, 91, who created the original Batmobile, has died. Friends and family interested in going to his funeral have been instructed to turn back tomorrow. Same Bat time, same Bat channel.

The SF Chronicle reported that the SF Public Utilities Commission has released a list of their top water users in 2014. #1 was the Menlo Country Club, which used 320,842 gallons a day in Sept, enough for 7,825 typical San Francisco homes., and 66,322 gallons more than the utilities commission allotted the club with the current drought.
Yeah, once again, only little people care about water.

From Marc Ragovin:  “Jeb Bush’s new campaign slogan is “Jeb Can Fix It.” Is he running for president or to become a new Pep Boy?”

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Ben Carson, on the pyramids in Egypt, which he thinks were NOT built as pharaohs’ graves. “My own personal theory is that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain.”
And some say it doesn’t matter that students don’t have to take much history to go to med school. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎cantfixignoranteither‬

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And finally, okay, friends and readers, time for a new game – what historical question would YOU like ask Ben Carson?

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Moving on.

November 3, 2015

Rough World Series for New York fans. Now they’ll have to go back to being disappointed by the Jets, Giants and Knicks.

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There are rumors that Jimmy Fallon may have a worrisome drinking issue after three recent injuries. Hoping for his sake it’s not true…. but if it is, would NBC want Leno to come back as a temporary fill-in? Beginning to think the guy has more lives than a cat.

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A woman who was a 2014-15 Alabama’s Teacher of the Year has resigned. This after she was moved from teaching 2nd grade to 5th, and then told she didn’t have the qualifications to teach fifth-graders. Shocking. Alabama has teaching qualifications?

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Obama ordered federal agencies to “ban the box” in their hiring decisions, meaning they can’t ask prospective government employees about their criminal histories on job applications. Who says the President never does anything for Congress?

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Activision-Blizzard is acquiring Candy Crush’s maker for $5.9 billion. $5.9 billions? Wow. In the days after Halloween aren’t you supposed to get a discount on candy?

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Police have charged a Houston man with murder, saying he fatally stabbed his friend for taking the last piece of chicken at dinner. Your move, Florida, ‪#‎ifonlytheywerebotharmed‬

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ESPN is reporting that the SF 49ers are benching QB Colin Kaepernick for Blaine Gabbert. Which is the NFL equivalent of rearranging desk chairs on the Titanic?

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The SF 49ers have also shipped TE Vernon Davis to the Denver Broncos for future draft picks. Hardest thing for Davis at this point – wiping that sh*t-eating grin off his face as he cleans out his locker.

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So besides being suspended for 1 game, Ohio State QB J.T. Barrett will lose his scholarship for the summer term after being arrested for DUI and trying to avoid a checkpoint (“backing without safety.”)
This punishment means that unless he pays tuition himself, Barrett will not be able to work out with the team over the summer, but his scholarship will resume next fall. Assuming J.T. doesn’t declare for the NFL draft. ‪#‎whosaysUrbanMeyerdoesnthavestandards‬ ‪#‎sarcasm‬

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The EPA is saying now that Volkswagen SUVs also used cheating software to get around U.S. emission standards. Ah, for the good old days when the most corrupt people in the car business were simply some used-car salesmen.

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Fox is now slamming CNBC for their non “substantive”” questions in the last GOP debate and saying they will do better in their next Fox Business debate. With more questions like this from the first Fox debate? “I want to know if any of [the candidates] have received a word from God on what they should do and take care of first,”

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Now Donald Trump’s campaign says they will negotiate separately and “directly with the host network to establish debate criteria that will determine Mr. Trump’s participation.”
Guessing one of the questions the Donald will not allow would be one about how he expects to work collaboratively with Congress and various world leaders.

Donald Trump also now says he turned down an invitation to be on the “boring and low-rated” Last Week Tonight with John Oliver .And the show responded on Twitter “Couple of points. 1. Yes, we have a boring show. 2. At no point did we invite Donald Trump to appear on it.
So at what point does Trump realize, if he offends every single media outlet, who’s going to cover his outbursts?

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From Alex Kaseberg  “This Halloween, a kid came to our door dressed as Mets player, Daniel Murphy. At first he was a big hit, but then he kept dropping his candy.”

(And of course it would be perfect if the candy he dropped was rainbow skittles.)

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