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Entering a football free zone.

February 9, 2016

 

Donald Trump is saying now he would not have run for President if he owned an NFL team. Quick, can some one sell him one?

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So which was more disappointing yesterday for serious fans? The ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ game or the #SuperBowl commercials?

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Rudy Giuliani on Beyonce’s Super Bowl Show, which featured a tribute to “Black Lives Matter,” “I thought it was really outrageous that she used it as a platform to attack police officers who are the people who protect her and protect us.” Shocking – Giulani spoke an entire sentence without mentioning 9-11?!

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If everyone hadn’t gotten their knickers in such a knot, most of America wouldn’t have even realized there WAS a political message in Beyonce’s Super Bowl halftime show.

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Broncos safety T.J. Ward on the Panthers after the Super Bowl “They want to be famous. We want to be champions. They want to be rappers and backup dancers. We want to play football.”
Apparently no one told Ward about the concept of being a sore winner

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Last night showed Cam Newton has a lot to learn. For starters Marshawn Lynch could have taught him “I’m just here so I don’t get fined.”

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A bright note for fans of many other teams – Panthers and Broncos showed yesterday you don’t really need a quarterback to win a Super Bowl.  (Yes, Bears fans, there’s hope even with Jay Cutler.

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The best thing about after hearing the words “I’m presenting the Super Bowl trophy to….” is that soon we will be hearing the words “Pitchers and catchers report.”

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The Cal band played at halftime of yesterday’s Super Bowl. Which was exciting for Bears band members- especially since they aren’t likely to get the chance to play at halftime of a Rose Bowl

 

Jack in the Box says they will give away 1 million free hamburgers. To paraphrase Johnny Carson 40 or so years ago, wow, that’s almost 100 pounds of meat.

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Former NY Mayor Michael Bloomberg says he IS considering running for President in 2016. Because the car doesn’t have enough clowns already?

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The U.S Treasury department said 4,279 people renounced U.S. citizenship in 2015, a new record. Which will be a very small percentage of the total if Donald Trump somehow gets elected

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A Broncos fan, Justin Kerrigan, told an NBC reporter he had paid $21,000 for Super Bowl tickets but said “Don’t tell my wife.” Well, it’s a good thing no one watches NBC.

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Tomorrow is the New Hampshire primary, the first actual primary, not caucus, of the 2016 Presidential election. For the rest of us, we’re only 2 weeks away from the first voting on American Idol.

 

 

 

A Royal Caribbean cruise ship has turned around and is heading back to New Jersey after being caught in damaging hurricane force winds on its way to the Bahamas. CNN is torn between covering the ship’s return and the New Hampshire primary.

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Scene right out of “Airplane” at Houston Intercontinental Airport. Someone opens a door they shouldn’t and a siren and announcement comes on “A fire alarm has been activated, please evacuate the building. Use the stairs. Do not use the elevator”. With continual siren. This announcement competes with the United agent saying “This happens all the time, please remain seated, we have not confirmed an actual fire alarm.”. Half expected them to start arguing about the red zone and the white zone.

 

 

From Alex Kaseberg  “Last year, Tom Brady gave his Super Bowl MVP truck to the player who won the game for them, safety Malcolm Butler. So is Von Miller giving his truck to Cam Newton?”

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On the road to LI

February 7, 2016

 

So the last pass in the long career of ‪#‎PeytonManning‬ is complete for the 2 point conversion ‪#‎SuperBowl‬

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It was not, however, Peyton’s greatest game.  Somewhere ‪#‎Tebow‬ has to be thinking. “I could have been the winning QB in this ‪#‎SuperBowl‬.” ‪#‎defensewinschampionships‬

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Peyton didn’t say definitely after the game that he was retiring. But guessing Americans will have to watch “The People vs. OJ Simpson if they want to see more of a slow white Bronco.

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Super Bowl concessions prices for small drinks today: $12-15 for beer, and $15-25 wine. And Yankees fans are going “why so cheap?”

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So with all the hype on the commercials and the halftime show seemed like the only time for TV viewers to take a bathroom break without missing anything was when the Broncos are on offense.

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Meanwhile, anyone with the prop bet of ‪#‎Talib‬ being the ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ most-penalized player had to be chilling champagne in the first quarter.

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Several players on both teams had problems with the Levi’s Stadium  field today,  and the groundskeepers were seen replacing divots. Apparently “normally, the NFL trucks in grass from Alabama, but the league decided it was too far a haul to California.”

Well, of course, this is what happens when a non-profit puts together an event on a shoe-string budget.

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Cam Newton abruptly just quit the Super Bowl postgame conference. So Cam didn’t get a ring -maybe that performance got him a congratulatory phone call from Sarah Palin?

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Trump, “We’re the highest taxed country in the world.” With all due respect, Donald, the U.S. isn’t even the highest taxed country in North America.

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Donald Trump Saturday night “I would bring back waterboarding. And I would bring back a hell of a lot worse.” What, like making suspects listen to his speeches?

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From my funny friend Alex Kaseberg  “This Super Bowl 50 dropped the Roman Numerals. The only place you’re going to still see Roman Numerals is on Peyton Manning’s birth certificate.”

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Marco Rubio is getting slammed for repeating the nearly identical anti-Obama four times in last night’s debate. And Rick Perry said “Hey, give the guy points for counting to four.”

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Countdown

February 7, 2016

So Sunday night the pre-Super Bowl hype will be over. The pre-NFL draft hype starts Monday.

 

As of Saturday, Super Bowl ticket prices have fallen under $2,700. That’s cheaper than a Jeb Bush vote in Iowa.

 

So which has become a worse version of Groundhog Day – the never-ending Super Bowl pre game show, or yet another GOP debate?

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All these experts making Super Bowl predictions. And of course all of them predicted a Panthers Broncos matchup.

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Gregg Popovich gave a nice tribute to Kobe Bryant before game. After ‪#‎Lakers‬ came within 4 of ending ‪#‎spurs‬ streak he might take it back

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Playboy debuted their first non-nude issue. So now men really can say they read it for the articles.

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Affluenza teen Ethan Couch has been transferred to an adult jail. “I feel so sorry for him” said nobody.

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A shooting at a strip club in Tampa has left 1 dead and 7 injured. And wonder how many more injured when the police investigation resulted in wives finding out their husbands were there.

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A friend somehow by mistake got on a Ted Cruz mailing list; his fundraising letter rails against moderates like Mitt Romney and John McCain, and says “it has been my honor to fight on your behalf against the DC liberals (of both parties.)…”
Showing again why Senator Cruz is so “beloved” in the Senate.

 

Justin Bieber was seen tonight in San Francisco skateboarding around town. That’s it. Time to build that wall. But on the Canadian border.

 

Donald Trump Saturday night “I would bring back waterboarding. And I would bring back a hell of a lot worse.” What, like making suspects listen to his speeches?

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Donald Trump, complaining today on Jeb Bush using Barbara on the campaign trail. Adding Bush “had to bring in mommy to take a slap at me. Not nice!” On the other hand, Trump attacking Jeb and his campaign – isn’t it also not nice to pick on those on life support?

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Martin Shrreli says “The only thing I regret about my Congressional testimony is forgetting to bring my Nintendo DS’: Is this guy trying to be a big enough douchebag that he gets considered for a possible Ted Cruz cabinet?

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#‎LetCarlyDebate‬ is seriously trending on social media. Wonder how many of the posts are by Carly supporters and how many are by comedians.

 

 

 

From TC  on the 58% percent increase in NFL concussions in 2015 compared to 2014: “Due mostly to Seahawks fans after February’s Super Bowl slapping themselves on their foreheads.”

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All about growth?

February 5, 2016

A new UCLA study says that 54 million Americans whose BMI says they are overweight or obese are actually healthy. Well, that calls for a cookie.

 

Roger Goodell, defending football despite seven high school players dying this season said “There’s risk in life. There’s risk in sitting on the couch.” Wow, so must be a tough crowd around the potato chip bowl at Goodell’s house.

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Louisville has self-imposed a one year postseason ban on their men’s basketball team over their recruiting scandal involving prostitutes and strippers. Coach Rick Pitino called the news “a complete shock.” What, he was expecting 2-4 years?

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An Iowa state senator has introduced a bill that would prohibit three state universities from cooperating with Stanford University until Stanford publicly apologizes for the band’s “unsporting behavior” during halftime of the Rose Bowl. Wow. And we thought in Iowa that Trump was a sore loser.

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The latest winter storm apparently grounded Donald Trump’s airplane and caused him to miss a postpone a New Hampshire rally. So maybe Mother Nature is a fan of Megyn Kelly?

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Brett Favre said he “would never bet against Peyton Manning”‘ in a Super Bowl. Well, until Brett changes his mind tomorrow.

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If it’s just about Megyn Kelly and nothing sexist, maybe as an alternative Trump would agree to participate in a debate moderated by Rachel Maddow?

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No Bill Clinton at last night’s debate. Well, it is Super Bowl week. Wonder if he volunteered personally to oversee the San Francisco prostitution task force?

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Some complained that the scheduled 90 minute Democratic debate went a little over two hours. Well, at least Biden decided not to run. If he had they might still be going.

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So now it appears that staffers for Condoleezza Rice and Colin Powell sent classified information from non-work accounts. Ah, but those who might make something of it have forgotten the cardinal rule IOKIYR.

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So Bernie and Hillary argued tonight on which of them is the most “progressive.” Does that mean the GOP candidates are arguing over who is the most “regressive?”

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U.S. unemployment has fallen to 4.9%, the lowest in 8 years. ‪#‎IblameObama‬

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Barbara Bush said she’s “sick of Trump.” As are many Americans. But apparently we’re sick of Bushes too.

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Going, going, gone?

February 4, 2016

Archie Manning says he has talked to Peyton and he is not sure if his son will retire or not after the Super Bowl. “The first time is the hardest,” responded Brett Favre.

 

Reports are now that Johnny Manziel struck his ex-girlfriend “several times” at a Dallas hotel last weekend. So Manziel clearly still has dreams of being signed by the Cowboys?

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The Raiders are apparently going to play an NFL game in Mexico in 2016. At the thought of the “Black Hole” coming to watch, Mexico immediately began taking bids on wall construction.

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Martin Shkreli apparently decided to stop answering questions and just smile and smirk today as he testified in front of a Congressional committee about price gouging with a life-saving drug. Got to figure members of Congress actually enjoyed having him there – Shikreli is one of the few people who make them look good by comparison.

 

McDonald’s is now giving away books in their Happy Meals. And millions of American children looked up from their phones and said “What are books?”

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Whatever happens in the 2016 election today’s Warriors’ White House visit marks the end of an era – a President who actually knows what he’s talking about with basketball.

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Maurice White, founder of Earth, Wind and Fire, has died at the age of 74. Maybe April is the cruelest month, but January and February 2016 have not been kind to aging rockers.

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The Des Moines Register is calling for a complete audit of the Iowa Democratic Caucuses as Hillary’s win was so close. Forget those coin tosses, the Clinton campaign clearly should have spread the rumor Sanders was going home.

 

Megyn Kelly will be anchoring the next Fox News GOP debate on March 3. You know it’s a strange election season when Fox has the high road.

 

 

Despite several GOP requests to include her, Carly Fiorina will be left out of the next debate. I can understand why the other candidates might want her on stage – Carly makes the rest of them seem nicer by compariso

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Now a desperate Jeb Bush is pulling out all the stops, with a campaign ad featuring…. his brother George W? Proving once again that Jeb has no business running for President.

 

#‎DemDebate‬ Hillary Clinton wants to streamline programs that are “duplicative and redundant.” Well, of course she does does.

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Meanwhile,  Jimmy Carter, at 91, our best and perhaps still sharpest ex-President. When asked in England if he had to pick”Trump or Cruz. – “I think I would choose Trump, which may surprise some of you,The reason is, Trump has proven already he’s completely malleable.I don’t think he has any fixed (positions) he’d go the White House and fight for. On the other hand, Ted Cruz is not malleable. He has far right-wing policies he’d pursue if he became president.”

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Dropping like flies

February 4, 2016

The Broncos’ Peyton Manning admitted being told he will probably need hip replacement surgery in future. Fortunately, he should have access to the best paleontologists.

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Jeb Bush’s Super Pac spent $14,900,000 in Iowa and he got 5,238 votes. That’s $2844 per vote. With that kind of overspending maybe Jeb should forget being President and aim for being GM of the LA Dodgers.

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Ah, Super Bowl media week. So Cam Newton was asked if he was “the Lebron James of the NFL?” He basically replied, “Why can’t Lebron be the Cam Newton of the NBA?”

Surprised actually that Cam didn’t respond “What, you think I’m only the second best player now in the NFL?”

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A story has emerged now that in 1998, John Elway turned down a deal, that amongst other things, would have let him buy 10% of the Denver Broncos for $15 million. And here Stanford fans think Elway’s biggest mistake was in clock management at the end of Big Game 1982.

( For non-Stanford fans, Elway called a time out with 8 seconds left before what he expected would be a game-winning field goal. Had he taken it down to less, the FG would have run out the clock. And Stanford would never have had to kick to Cal, and their own band…)

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The lawyer for Deborah Jeane Palfrey, the D.C. Madam, who hung herself in 2008 after being convicted for racketeering and prostitution charges, wants to release her black book naming over 800 clients. And he claims it could elect the Presidential election.
Well, gosh, and things have been so dull up to this point….

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Rand Paul today became the latest to drop out of the 2016 Presidential race, saying. “It’s been an incredible honor to run a principled campaign for the White House.” “Principled campaign?” Proving again he had no chance from the start. ‪#‎wedontneednostinkingprinciples‬

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Rick Santorum is the latest to drop out of the GOP Presidential race. Shocking millions of Americans who thought he quit running after 2012.

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Trump has now tweeted that “Based on the fraud committed by Senator Ted Cruz during the Iowa caucus either a new election should take place or Cruz results nullified.”
So all those who were worried that Trump’s gracious and reasonable speech Monday night signaled the circus might be winding down – uh, not exactly.

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Although the email has emerged sent by Ted Cruz’s deputy campaign director “The press is reporting that Dr. Ben Carson is taking time off from the campaign trail after Iowa and making a big announcement next week. Please inform any Carson caucus goers of this news and urge them to caucus for Cruz.”
It’s this sort of classy behavior that has earned Ted the title “Most Hated Man in the Senate.”

 

Someone in Southern California who won a $63 million Lottery Jackpot last August will lose it all if they don’t claim the money by Feb 4. Heck, and most of feel badly when we misplace a bill or a check

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Almost winning?

February 2, 2016

Can’t wait for the Steve Harvey interview with Donald Trump on his Iowa Caucus win last night.

 

The House today failed to override President Obama’s veto of a bill to repeal Obamacare. So maybe Paul Ryan actually has a sense of humor in scheduling the vote on Groundhog Day?

 

Almost all signs of the SF 49ers have been removed from Levi’s Stadium for Super Bowl weekend. Except for the red seats.  But that won’t be a problem. Unlike for most of the late season 49ers games, on Sunday those seats will actually have fans sitting in them.

 

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Colin Kaepernick apparently wants out with the SF 49ers to play for the Jets. This is like an elephant trying to abandon Barnum & Bailey’s for Ringling Brothers

 

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The Broncos have sent rookie safety Ryan Murphy home after he was detained and questioned as part of a prostitution sting today. Really? You’re part of a a Super Bowl team and you can’t even find sex for free? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎rookiemistake‬

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The Cleveland Browns will apparently release Johnny Manziel in March. So much for his prediction of “wrecking this league.” Looks like what Manziel was really good at was wrecking his career.

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The CDC now says that any woman of childbearing age not using birth control should abstain from alcohol. Uh, isn’t drinking how many babies get conceived in the first place?

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Hillary Clinton apparently won six Iowa precincts by coin toss. So maybe that answers one question “Whatever happened to those Patriots ballboys?”

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Groundhog Day happening at about the same time as the Iowa caucuses is very confusing. So did that furry thing that lives on Trump’s head see his shadow or not?

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Just when we were about to utter the magic words “Who cares any more about Iowa?” comes the news that Bernie Sanders is not ready to concede. So maybe all those reporters better not check out of their rooms yet.

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Marissa Mayer says Yahoo will lay off 15% of its global workforce and close five offices. And this plan “will enable us to accelerate Yahoo’s transformation.” So sounds like Ms. Mayer is well on her way to following Carly Fiorina into politics.

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So the Sacramento Kings nixed a Chinese New Year t-shirt giveaway because it referenced “Year of the Monkey” and had a purple money on it. DeMarcus Cousins and others apparently thought it was “racially insensitive” on the first day of Black History Month.
Now, I’m generally liberal and proud of it but where does this stop? Cops vetoing “Year of the Pig? Lawyers vetoing “Year of the Snake?” Or some white voters complaining about “Year of the Sheep?

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Last night CNN covered Cruz, Trump, Rubio, Clinton and Sanders speeches. Fox News only covered the GOP candidates. So fair and balanced only means between “right” and “far right?”

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After Iowa

February 1, 2016

So the 2016 caucuses in Iowa are over.  No doubt someone will be setting up a potential campaign office for 2020 tomorrow.

 

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#‎IowaCaucus‬ numbers: ‪#‎Huckabee‬ – 3,305 ‪#‎Christie‬ – 3,247. So NJ Gov. got 57 fewer votes less than guy who suspended his campaign tonight.

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Record number of GOP caucus goers in Iowa. The turnout, at 150,000, is about the same as a good three-day ‪#‎SFGiants‬ ‪#‎LADodgers‬ series.

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#‎MarcoRubio‬ gives a great victory speech – thanking 39,000 Iowans for his third place finish. ‪#‎IowaCaucus‬

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Marco Rubio does an awfully good job of attacking Hillary Clinton for not keeping her personal and work emails separate for someone who has been almost indicted for, at best, not keeping his personal and work credit cards separate.

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Some say the young Senator Marco Rubio is a GOP Barack Obama.  One major difference – one of Obama’s parents was actually a U.S. citizen.

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Breaking news from 2012 – Mike ‪#‎Huckabee‬ has just suspended his Presidential campaign.

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Martin O’Malley says he will suspend his Presidential campaign. And millions of American in unison respond “who?

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#‎MartinOMalley‬ just suspended campaign. Wonder if he’s found moving company to return him from midwest to ‪#‎Baltimore‬ in middle of night?

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Ah Donald. In Council Bluffs, Iowa, Trump went to church, mistook the communion plate for the collection plate and tried to put in an donation. Well, when this election is over he can relax and start not going to services except for weddings again.

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Adele said through a spokesman that she has NOT given Donald Trump permission to play her “Rolling in the Deep” and “Skyfall,” So how long until Trump adds the British onto his anti-immigrant list?

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President Obama has announced $1 billion in funding over the next two years in an effort to cure cancer. Waiting for the GOP rebuttal.

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Now Jerry Falwell, Jr, has endorsed Trump. Forget the clown car, it’s looking like SRO on the clown private jet.

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Apparently a couple of the Denver Broncos’ team buses were involved in a minor traffic accident – “a small wreck” according to one of the players.  No injuries reported. So the biggest wreck in this postseason still remains Carlson Palmer.

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Jim Harbaugh just wrote that he returned to Michigan because he loves the school and Ann Arbor. Well, that and he was thoroughly out of love with the 49ers and Jed York/Trent Baalke.

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Another day, another fire story. Maybe if we really want to stop ISIL we should just start shipping them hoverboards.

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American Airlines is the latest to trumpet that free snacks are coming back to domestic flights. Really amazing, not that many years ago airlines gave us free meals, now they expect gratitude for free snacks. Kind of the travel equivalent of Stockholm Syndrome.

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The Cleveland Cavaliers’ recent strong play was apparently sparked by a players-only meeting. Not sure what was discussed but maybe “Hey guys, we just got a 30-11 coach fired, if we don’t step it up fans will think it just might be OUR fault.”

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Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson, told a crowd at a Ted Cruz rally that same-sex marriage is “evil” and “wicked.” Right, instead men should do as he says and did and “marry girls when they’re 15 or 16.” (Phil’ wife Kay was 16.)

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Greased

February 1, 2016

So guess ‪#‎EvePlumb‬ got through all of ‪#‎GreaseLive‬ without even one round of “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia….”

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And who knew Fox’s “Grease Live” would be the most entertaining live event of the day.   Okay, maybe with the NHL All-Star game and NFL Pro Bowl they didn’t have much competition.   But it was fun.

 

So a) how lousy was the Pro Bowl as a game and/or b) how dangerous is football, that what seems like half the NFL turned down a free trip to Hawaii to avoid it?

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So considering the number of dropouts, declines and “injured” players, should the MVP for the ‪#‎ProBowl‬ get a participation trophy?

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Good news tonight, Feb 1, we’ll finally have actual results in Iowa. Better news, we’ll be only 16 days from pitchers & catchers reporting

 

Apparently rumors of El Chapo escaping again are just a hoax. So you’re still alive if you have February in the pool.

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The NY Times noted this quote from an email sent to Mich. Gov. Rick Snyder that a state nurse told one young mother to not worry when her son’s blood showed an elevated lead level. “It is just a few IQ points. … It is not the end of the world,”
So was the tainted water part of a plot to create more GOP voters?

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White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest said Hillary Clinton won’t be Indicted “based on what we know.” I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that phrase sounds similar to Clinton in 2008 saying Barack Obama wasn’t a Muslim “as far as I know.”

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Regarding the Clinton email situation it’s good to see how all the people who are up in arms over the potential security risks and want indictments are the same ones who wanted to indict Cheney and others in the Bush administration over Valerie Plame…. Oops, never mind.

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Marco Rubio said that Bernie Sanders “is a good candidate for President of Sweden.”. What’s next, him saying Ted Cruz should be President of Canada?

(Sweden is a constitutional monarchy -with a Prime Minister, like Canada.)

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For all the fuss about the Iowa caucuses, an interesting side note is that you must be registered with a party to caucus, and there are many independents. So not only is Iowa a relatively small state, the turnout is approximately 15 percent of its registered voters.

 

Many of the GOP candidates in Iowa have gone to Crossroads Sports in Des Moines for shooting and target practice. If publicity is the goal, wouldn’t it have been more interesting for them to schedule duels?

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Todd Weiler, a GOP state senator in Utah, has introduced legislation to declare porn a “public health hazard” and an epidemic. Weiler is comparing naysayers to climate change deniers – “These are scientific facts, just like global warming,”
What a shocking story.. A GOP legislator believes in global warming?

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Apparently the NFL was trying to sell suites for the Super Bowl for $500,000 to $1 million, but the remaining suites have fallen in price to about $150,000. Wow. and that’s with all the corporations who buy the suites recouping some of their costs by writing them off as deductions. ‪#‎ourtaxdollarsatwork‬

 

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Ted Cruz, campaigning against Michelle Obama’s healthy eating efforts:
“Let me say something to the school-aged kids here. “If Heidi Cruz becomes the next first lady, French fries are coming back to the cafeteria.’
Because U.S. kids don’t get enough junk food? ‪#‎MakeAmericafatagain‬

 

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Ted Cruz’s campaign in Iowa is sending out mailers saying “ACTION ALERT: VOTER VIOLATION,” “PUBLIC RECORD” and “FURTHER ACTION NEEDED.” With this text “You are receiving this election notice because of low expected voter turnout in your area. Your individual voting history as well as your neighbors’ are public record. Their scores are published below, and many of them will see your score as well. CAUCUS ON MONDAY TO IMPROVE YOUR SCORE and please encourage your neighbors to caucus as well. A follow-up notice may be issued following Monday’s caucuses.”

So Cruz is trying to prove he’s really American because Canadians wouldn’t be that scummy?

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Not watered down.

January 30, 2016

 

The situation in Flint has made some nervous about New Orleans’ drinking water because the city still has some lead pipes from the early 1900s still in use. Solution for locals? Beer, wine, and whiskey neat.

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A Delta Air Lines flight from Los Angeles to Minneapolis had to make an unscheduled landing in Salt Lake City because two flight female flight attendants got into a on board fistfight over “work issues” No word on if the airline also charged passengers a “catfight” fee.

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Wonder what the polls will say on Monday about ‪#‎Iowa‬. Wait, we’re going to have actual VOTES?!!  Or caucus votes at least.  What a concept.

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Iowa caucuses and “The Bachelor” both will be on TV Monday night. Difference at this point is that “The Bachelor” has more plausible human beings.

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Police were called over an “incident” potentially involving Johnny Manziel and his ex-girlfriend early Saturday morning.  So congrats to all those who had January 30 in the last pool.

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In Benicia, California, an FBI badge, credentials and three handguns were stolen from a secured FBI vehicle parked overnight in a neighborhood, What could possibly go wrong?. ‪#‎goodguywithagunbecomesstupidguywithoutguns‬

 

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“The Revenant” didn’t get Best Picture at the SAG awards. So those who enjoy watching a winner emerge from white-on-white violence will just have to wait until the Iowa caucuses.

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Cliven Bundy says now that LaVoy Finicum was “assassinated” during the wildlife refuge occupation. “These men in local, state, and U.S. government feared the truths that LaVoy Finicum was standing for….”
Well, that ought to really help Cliven’s son Ammon’s chances for bail.

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Donald Trump is referring repeatedly to Ted Cruz as an “anchor baby.” But is Trump himself a host for the foreign–born furry thing that lives on his head?

 

 

 

From T.C. “If you bet on this weekend’s Pro Bowl, you are a degenerate. If you bet on both the Pro Bowl and the NHL All Star game, you need counseling.”

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No place like home?

January 29, 2016

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Chargers chairman Dean Spanos says that the team will stay put in 2016. And while they have “an option and an agreement with the Los Angeles Rams to go to Inglewood in the next year, my focus is on San Diego.” Translation, “my new girlfriend isn’t ready for me to move in with her yet, so for now I’m staying home with you, honey.”

 

 

Clippers coach Doc Rivers on Blake Griffin’s breaking his hand in a fight with a team equipment manager “You have to forgive people at some point. I believe that. We built Richard Nixon a library,”
Waiting for someone to say ‘I knew Richard Nixon, Richard Nixon was a friend of mine, Blake, sir, is no Richard Nixon.”

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Notre Dame football Brian Kelly has just signed a six-year contract extension. Which I am sure if he does well and the NFL comes calling he will take as seriously as the four-year contract he signed at Cincinnati in 2009.

(note to the uninitiated, Kelly then left Cincy for Notre Dame in December, 2009.)

 

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Coach Jim Harbaugh, responding to criticism over three two recent high school seniors having their offers rescinded by Michigan: “It’s a meritocracy with everything we do in our program. It’s going to continue to be that.”
Showing again both why Harbaugh was so successful at Stanford and why no one tried that hard to convince him not to leave.

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Carly Fiorina said last night “Listen, if my husband did what Bill Clinton did, I would have left him long ago.” Instead Carly just left her first husband to marry her second husband….. ‪#‎familyvalues

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So Trump said at his anti-debate rally he was there because he had been treated badly and was standing up for his rights. Great, so that means if elected and he gets upset at other world leaders Trump will just go off and have his own summit?

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Okay, really? Now there’s a lot of attention being paid to Megyn Kelly’s fake eyelashes at last night’s debate? Of course, to be fair, maybe her lashes were sourced from a relative of that furry thing that lives on Trump’s head.

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Hillary Clinton said she turned her ‪#‎Snapchat‬ account over to Bill for the day. And we thought her email issue was a mistake with technology?

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Chris Christie, asked about Bridgegate last night, pointed to several investigations that cleared him of wrong doing. And no doubt if elected he promises to launch another investigation on Benghazi?

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Meanwhile up in Canada, PM Justin Trudeau related how his wife told him “Okay, it’s great that you’re engaged and modeling to your daughter that you want her empowered, but you need to take as much effort to talk to your sons [who are 2 and 8] about how he treats women and grow up to be a feminist, just like Dad.”
Hmm, as a break from all these 2016 U.S. candidates can we borrow Canada’s First Family?

 

Birth defects resulting from the Zika virus have become scary enough that in England couples are being told not to become pregnant for a month after returning from an infected country. Will the U.S. be next with warnings? Of course those who don’t believe in science can ignore them.

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A 35 year-old married lawyer has been banned from all five Broward county jails after she was caught allegedly having sex with her client, an alleged murderer, in an interview room at the main jail this week. Back on your game, Florida.

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You had one job

January 28, 2016

We might have a winner for the year in the #Youhadonejob, and it goes to the guy in charge of painting the end zones for Super Bowl 50 at Levi’s Stadium – they painted TWO with the Broncos logo.  And forgot about the Panthers. #Nottheonion

 

 

The Dallas Cowboys will not resign Greg Hardy. Apparently because Hardy was frequently late for meeting, and wasn’t in peak physical condition because he partied too much. So domestic violence is okay as long as you show up on time and in shape?

 

 

Missouri dismissed QB Maty Mauk from the football team for “violating team rules” after a video surfaced of him apparently snorting cocaine. Mauk had a 17-5 record as a starter. Too soon to start a pool on which coach will give him a second chance?

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In New York City , police arrested two men with $14 million in heroin in the bed of a big pickup truck after the men were spotted driving around looking for parking. Truly insane. Not the attempted smuggling, but who thinks with a pickup truck they can find actual parking on NYC streets?

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Affluenza teen Ethan Couch was flown from Puerto Vallarta to Dallas today. Wonder if he complained about the trip not being first class?

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Some controversy over Joseph Fiennes being cast to play Michael Jackson in an upcoming BBC TV movie. Is that because Fiennes is white or because he’s male?

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John McCain says of the current election “I’ve never seen anything like this.” And presumably this even includes the Lincoln-Douglas debates

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Best news for ‪#‎ChrisChristie‬ during tonight’s GOP debate. Not just more air time without Trump, less competition for post debate doughnuts.

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Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee decided to attend Donald Trump’s rally after the children’s table debate tonight. Because apparently at this point they dislike Trump less than they love ANY publicity.

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Today Trump said that it was Fox News’ sarcastic comments about his withdrawal that sealed his decision to stay away from the debates. Attention US friends and enemies – so apparently it’s not just “sticks and stones” that hurt the Donald…

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Now rumors that the Oakland Raiders are looking into a move to…. Las Vegas. Not that the NFL would allow it as of course the league wants nothing to do with gambling…

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Much media discussion of the Challenger disaster today. And it was awful. But for those of us who were kids in the 1960s, it’s actually another sad anniversary – Apollo 1, January 27, 1967 – Gus Grissom, Edward White, and Roger Chaffee. Remembering them as well.

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Damn. R.I.P. Paul Kantner, 74. I remember when you were a youngster if you thought first of the band being known as Jefferson Starship. “Nothing ever breaks up the heart, Only tears give you away….” (from Miracles.)

 

My younger friends may not believe this with the various explicit rap and other lyrics these days but when ‪#‎JeffersonStarships‬‘ “Miracles” came out, many radio stations played a version where they censored the lyrics- the offending line ‘I get a taste of the real world, when I go down on you, girl.”

Seems so quaint today.

 

Pat Riley: LeBron ‘never, ever’ requested Erik Spoelstra firing when he was at Miami. Well, of course not, when you’re a superstar you get your posse to handle making that kind of request for you.

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On the rebound?

January 27, 2016

All 7 New England Patriots selected to the Pro Bowl will miss the game due to “injuries.” Right, they’re sick about losing to Peyton Manning and the Broncos.

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Meanwhile, the Spurs did not appear TOO traumatized by their loss to the Warriors.  (San Antonio 130, Houston 99, and it wasn’t that close.)

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Congrats to Gregg Popovich for being named the NBA Western Conference All-Star game coach. Just to show there are no hard feelings over Monday’s loss Pop has promised to make sure Steph Curry and Draymond Green both get to play at least 46 minutes.

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Cam Newton: “I’m an African-American quarterback that may scare a lot of people because they haven’t seen nothing that they can compare me to.” Even Joe Namath is thinking, “Kid, just a LITTLE humility, please.”

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A Twitter rumor has the New England Patriots talking to Stanford quarterback Kevin Hogan.  Say it ain’t so. Did Hogan tell them Stanford has an Honor Code that says no cheating?

 

Today is the ‪#‎ProBowl‬ draft?! And if you knew that and cared, you might REALLY have too much time on your hands.

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Affluenza teen Ethan Couch has waived his fight against extradition and will be returning to Texas. Translation, Mexican detention centers probably aren’t the Four Seasons.

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So when ‪#‎AbeVigoda‬ showed up at the pearly gates wonder if St. Peter originally waived him off with “Go home, you’re not fooling me.”

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An American Airlines flight from London to Los Angeles had to turn around and return to Heathrow today due to some medical emergency involving passengers and crew. Let’s hope they didn’t have the fish.

 

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Got to love New Orleans priorities. A major 6 alarm fire in an empty building near the French Quarter has thankfully so far not resulted in any injuries. And the local headline “Canal Street fire could affect Mardi Gras parade route

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There’s a thing going around  Facebook, if you were kidnapped, what TV shows’ characters would you want to come rescue you? Forget all these cop shows – give me Downton Abbey: NOBODY messes with the Dowager Duchess and Lady Mary.

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Donald Trump’s campaign manager – “What we know is Megyn Kelly is totally obsessed with Mr. Trump.” Uh, who is totally obsessed with who?

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So no one can figure out how to stop Donald Trump. Here’s an idea. Tell him if he is elected President all major networks will jointly appoint Megyn Kelly as their White House Correspondent.

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Ben Carson says about the election, “I see the threat being the fact that people sometimes are not well educated.”They don’t have a clue what you’re talking about, and yet these are people who vote.”
Right, and this is the same good doctor who says being gay is a choice and that the Jews could have prevented the Holocaust if they had guns.

 

U.S. public health officials are warning that we need to be prepared for the almost certain spread of the Zika virus. Waiting for anti-government types to demand that the feds do more to keep us safe.

 

 

Was at the bank today in Los Altos where the older woman in front of me apologized to the teller and stood back a bit from the counter, saying she had just come back from the Caribbean, had been bitten by some mosquitoes, and was afraid she might be contagious with the Zika virus. Sigh. Here we go again. ‪#‎nothingtofearbutfearitself‬ ‪#‎feariswinning‬

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Fear and loathing

January 26, 2016

Donald Trump is now saying he will “definitely” skip Thursday’s GOP debate on Fox. So this man thinks he can stand up to America’s enemies, and he can’t even stand up to Megyn Kelly?

 

Donald Trump & Sarah Palin have done so much for Megyn Kelly & Tina Fey’s careers/earning potential they could almost ask for royalties?

 

 

Unclear on the concept – Trump says he doesn’t want to debate because Megyn Kelly is a “lightweight.” Uh, to use a sports analogy, no NBA team is upset this year to see the Lakers or 76ers next on their schedule.

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Arizona sheriff Joe Arpaio has endorsed Donald Trump for President. Well, of course he did. Assume the self-styled “America’s Toughest Sheriff” has designs on being Attorney General?

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And now John Rocker is endorsing Trump. Wow. Anyone heard from Archie Bunker lately?

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Missouri QB Maty Mauk has been suspended from the football program for the third time since September. The first was a violation of team rules, the second after a dispute in a bar, and this time after a video surfaced of him allegedly smoking cocaine. Even Johnny Manziel is thinking “Dude, get it together.”

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Tom Delay is claiming the FBI is “ready to indict” Hillary Clinton. Well, I guess Delay does consider himself an expert on indictments.

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Los Angeles Clippers forward Blake Griffin reportedly fractured his hand during an argument with a member of the team’s equipment staff.  So was the injury during the fight itself, or when the guy moved towards Griffin and Blake flopped?

 

Peyton Manning reportedly told Bill Belichick after the AFC Championship that this *(Super Bowl) might be my last rodeo.” And Belichick no doubt was thinking “We expected THIS game to be your last rodeo.”

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In a week the first 2016 Presidential caucuses will be over. And then we can go back to not caring about Iowa for four years.

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Reports of hearing gunshots at Naval Medical Center San Diego apparently were a false alarm. But now everyone at the Center will be banned from playing “Call of Duty” without the sound muted.

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The SF 49ers hired as their new defensive coordinator the Browns’ Jim O’Neill. So no one told them Cleveland’s only good defensive performance last year was against San Francisco?

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New York Jets lineman Sheldon Richardson was placed on 2 years probation after pleading guilty to reduced charges stemming from a July police chase in St. Louis. He allegedly drove up to 143 mph, resisted arrest, and was found to have a loaded handgun under the floor mat. Police also detected a “strong marijuana” odor in the car.
Richardson served a four-game suspension this year for violating the NFL’s substance abuse policy. but his lawyer doesn’t expect additional discipline.
Once again, it’s part of the league’s strict “12 strikes and you’re out” policy.

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Today’s Darwin nominee: Michigan police say a man who killed in a single car rollover accident in Detroit wasn’t wearing pants and was watching porn while driving. Women are going “How appalling stupid can you be?” Men are going “You can do that?”

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Breaking news that Oregon protest leader Ammon Bundy and others have been arrested; 1 person is reportedly dead. ‪#‎Ifonlytheywerearmed‬…. no, wait, never mind.

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In Kentucky, a federal judge has ruled that the state cannot deny millions of $$ in a tourism tax incentive to a religious group building a Noah’s Ark attraction, citing First Amendment grounds. Alrighty then, who’s ready to join me in supporting a Wiccan theme park? Or “Atheist World?” Or heck, why not “Mecca Land?”

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Messing with Texas.

January 26, 2016

Against Golden State tonight, San Antonio turned the ball over so often you have to wonder if Carlson Palmer was involved.

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Apparently Johnny Manziel spent Sunday afternoon watching the Patriots and Broncos while drinking and partying at a Dallas bar. Well, makes sense. Guessing this will be one more in a long line of NFL playoff games that Manziel will be watching at a bar.

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Lebron James, talking about Tyronn Lue’s “vision” of implementing an up-coming offense. “I don’t know. We don’t know. This is what Coach wants to do… this isn’t a LeBron thing.” Translation, if it doesn’t work, Lue’s tenure could be nasty, brutal and short.

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Tom Brady, after yesterday’s loss, says he has “no excuses.” No worries, no doubt Giselle has plenty of them.

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Khloe Kardashian said of Lamar Odom that, “he’s doing great, but his memory’s not so good.” Maybe he’s doing great because he forgot he was married to a Kardashian?

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Donald Rumsfeld said that George H.W. Bush’s criticisms of him are not “very helpful” to Jeb’s run for the presidency. With all due respect, the person who is the least helpful to Jeb’s run for the presidency is Jeb.

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In Orlando, two former tech employees have filed a lawsuit, claiming Disney colluded with consulting companies in using H-1B visas to hire people from India to replace them. Not sure what will happen, but between legal fees and a possible settlement, sounds like ticket prices are going up.

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#‎RickPerry‬ has endorsed ‪#‎TedCruz‬. Wonder how many reasons the Texas Governor gave for the endorsement?

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Glenn Beck today called Donald Trump a “very dangerous man” after Trump’s remarks about shooting someone last week. Just how insane do you have to be for Beck to call you dangerous? ‪#‎guessweknowtheanswertothatquestion‬

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A Texas grand jury looking into allegations against Planned Parenthood has issued indictments  – against the anti-abortion activists who made the videos.  Waiting for some GOP candidate to say, “Well, of course that’s what happens in a commie-pinko blue state…. Oops, never mind.

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So now that the Texas grand jury has cleared Planned Parenthood but indicted the people who made those misleading videos can we name Carly Fiorina as an unindicted co-conspirator?

 

Donald Trump says he could shoot someone dead on Fifth Avenue and not lose any votes.  And somewhere Charlie Crist is thinking “But just try putting your arm around President Obama.”

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Chris Christie, in response to a questioner who asked him why he was in New Hampshire campaigning instead of back in New Jersey dealing with storm damage and flooding “What do you want me to do, bring a mop?”
If he does get the nomination, Christie could do the near impossible – make Hillary Clinton look warm and fuzzy.

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This bus-to-hell moment brought to you by Alex Kaseberg  “Alaska was hit with a 7.2 earthquake. It was so bad it knocked Bristol Palin off the dude she just met.”

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Clipped wings?

January 24, 2016

Right about now if Carson Palmer threw a tantrum it would be intercepted.

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Maybe we should have expected this Panthers-Cardinals result – cat owners do know what cats do to birds.

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Meanwhile,  Manning vs. Brady turned out to be a battle for the aged.

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Interesting that for as little difference as the decision to make the PAT a 33 yard kick may have made the season, that decision might have kept the Patriots out of the Super Bowl.

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The snow has stopped, and headlines in New York papers today say things like “We survived.” And in places like Denver, Chicago and Minneapolis they are just giggling.

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In Kansas, State Senator Mitch Holmes instituted a dress code for women testifying before committees – no short skirts or plunging necklines, as he says they look provocative and are a distraction Hmm, now for men, what about comb-overs, bad toupees. and pants belted under bellies, which look ridiculous and are a distraction.

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Donald Trump wants Megyn Kelly off the next debate, Fox has responded “Megyn Kelly has no conflict of interest. Donald Trump is just trying to build up the audience for Thursday’s debate, for which we thank him.”
How often do I say this, “Fox News is right.”

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Bizarre fact on Monday’s  ‪#‎SpursvsWarriors‬ game; GS coach Steve Kerr retired after playing for San Antonio in 2003, 3 of his teammates & coach still on team.

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Rick Santorum says if he doesn’t do well in Iowa he may end up ending his 2016 Presidential campaign. Shocking. Santorum is still running in 2016?

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Jeb Bush today praised Michigan Gov. Rick Snyder for “stepping up” and accepting responsibility for the Flint water crisis. Amazed he didn’t say “Rickie, you’re doing a helluva job.”

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A Brooklyn man, playing around with a gun he thought was unloaded, put it to his friend’s head and pulled the trigger. He thought wrong. And has been arrested for homicide. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎yourmoveFlorida‬

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To all who love to dismiss the idea of gun control working when there is a shooting in Canada or a city or state with tough laws. So since there are still deaths resulting from drunk drivers does that mean we should give up on DUI laws? Heck, for that matter why have laws against murder. It doesn’t stop all of them.

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There’s no place like snow?

January 24, 2016

It’s an ill wind that blows nobody any good.  http://nypost.com/2016/01/23/this-panda-is-having-a-better-snow-day-than-you/

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A piece of wreckage that may belong to MH370 has been found in Thailand. CNN is crushed, they couldn’t have this happen on a weekend where they don’t have Snowageddon to cover?

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Not sure whose fault this storm is. But wonder if in Philadelphia some crazy fan said “God, please don’t let the 76ers lose again Saturday night”?

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In New York, Broadway shows were told to close Saturday. And no doubt hardy locals were thinking “No, no, it’s our one chance to get reasonably priced standby or Stubhub tickets to Hamilton.”

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And with all the train, transit, restaurant, theater etc. closing in New York over snow, no doubt folks in Chicago,  Green Bay and Minneapolis were united in thinking “WIMPS!”

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Temperatures in Orlando, Florida have fallen into the 40s and may go as low as 33 tonight. “I feel so sorry for them” said no one on the East Coast.

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George Zimmerman’s divorce has been finalized. So guess what ladies, he’s single.

 

Apparently at least 80% of the money in Las Vegas has been waged on the Patriots tomorrow, even as 3 point favorites. So if Peyton and the Broncos pull it out, the top champagne toast for Vegas bookies will be “Omaha!”

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Barbara Bush has made a campaign ad for Jeb’s run for President, “Rather than talking about how popular they are or how great they are, he’s doing it because he sees huge need and it’s not being filled by anybody.”
Wonder how long it will take another GOP candidate showing Barbara saying we’ve had enough Bushes in the White House?

 

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Now Michael Bloomberg is talking about jumping into the Presidential race as a third party candidate. If nothing else he’ll give Trump a run on who has the biggest ego in New York City.

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Donald Trump said today at a rally in Iowa “I could stand in the middle of 5th Ave, shoot somebody & I wouldn’t lose any voters, it is incredible.”
I am not sure what’s scarier, that Trump said, it, or that it’s probably true.

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In Renton, Washington, an allegedly drunk young man dropped his gun in a movie theater showing “13 Hours.” It discharged and critically injured a woman ‪#‎ifonlytheotherpatronshadbeenarmed‬

 

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So after today, the SAT test is changing and will no longer require the vocabulary section with often obscure words. Those of us who got into college partly because of how much we read find this rather lugubrious.

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The King’s speech?

January 23, 2016

The Cleveland Cavaliers, 30-11, have fired coach David Blatt. Wait a minute, the Cavs had a coach besides Lebron?

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The Cleveland Cavaliers say LeBron James was not consulted in the firing of David Blatt. Right. Lebron was, however, reportedly heard to say “Will no one rid me of this troublesome coach?

 

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A 21-year-old University of Virginia student who was on a 5-day tour out of China has been arrested in North Korea, for allegedly committing a ‘hostile act under orders from Washington.”
Thinking, if you are American who goes voluntarily to North Korea, and your name isn’t Rodman, you deserve what you get. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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Jeffery H. Cohen, 70, of Pittsburgh died last week. In his obituary: Jeffrey would ask that in lieu of flowers, please do not vote for Donald Trump.”
Well, the primary is April 26, don’t suppose that for him Cohen’s family could file a VERY absentee ballot?

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Willie Robertson of “Duck Dynasty” has endorsed Donald Trump. But his dad Phil has endorsed Ted Cruz. Well, it could do wonders for ratings if father and son decide to settle this with a duel.

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Bar owners near Wrigley Field are worried about the Cubs’ new outdoor plaza area, specifically that the team might try to undersell them on beer. This would never happen near Yankee Stadium – the Yankees will never sell beer lower than ANYBODY.

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It’s the 43rd anniversary of ‪#‎RoevWade‬ and the Wisconsin state senate just voted to take away $8 million in federal funds for Planned Parenthood. So wonder how many unwanted pregnancies and thus potential abortions THAT will result in….

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Why there is no satire: The New York City Department of Parks had planned a snow festival in the city this weekend. It has been canceled – due to snow.

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So now that Jonas is turning out to be the real deal, there are two numbers for storm watchers to speculate about: How many Inches of snow? And how many weekend Darwin award winners?

 

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Bus to hell guest sport from TC  “Singer Don MacLean was arrested this week for domestic assault. His lawyer is blaming it on too much whiskey and rye.”

 

 

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We don’t need no stinking bats

January 21, 2016

Increasingly looking like the designated hitter will be a done deal in the 2017 season in the NL. Well, there’s talk of the ‪#‎SFGiants‬ renegotiating Bumgarner’s contract – wonder if besides a nice raise ‪#‎Madbum‬ will insist that HE can DH?

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So one of the reason MLB may be moving to a universal DH is the threat of injury to their star pitchers who don’t handle a bat well. Well, if that’s the rationale, why not add DRs – designated runners for stars who don’t move that well? ‪#‎wherewillitend‬? ‪#‎notrealbaseball‬

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Increasingly difficult for a comedy writer today to ‪#‎Trump‬ reality. Satire is ‪#‎Palin‬ by comparison.

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Former UConn and Portland Trail Blazers basketball player Cliff Robinson is opening a recreational marijuana dispensary in Oregon, saying there’s a “mis-perception that athletes and cannabis are incompatible.” Okay, “illegal”? Maybe. “Incompatible? – Not to anyone who’s been paying attention.’

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Herman Cain says he gets callers all the time who say “I am black, I’m female and I’m going from Democrat to Trump.” If true, maybe someone needs to send Cain a link to an Urban Dictionary – the page referring to “catfish.”

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Louisana consistently ranks as the state with the worst health in the nation. Now with new Governor John Bel Edwards accepting the ACA, the state health dept expects almost 450,000 patients to be added to Medicaid, including 300,000 previously uninsured. ‪#‎IblameObama‬

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In New Jersey, the assembly passed a bill last June with almost unanimous bipartisan support to prevent anyone convicted of gang activity, making terror threats or carjacking from buying or owning a gun in the state. This week, Chris Christie vetoed it.
And the formerly pro-gun control Governor expects us to believe he can stand up to our enemies? He can’t even stand up to the NRA.

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The Oscars boycott list grows, now Will Smith says he will not attend and Mark Ruffalo is thinking about it. If this keeps up they might actually get the show finished this year in under four hours.

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Wow. Bizjournals.com reports this from United Airlines’ Vice Chairman Jim Compton “We’ve come to recognize that completion factor — getting people from point A to B — is the most important metric.”
What was their first clue?

 

Eric Garcetti, L.A.’s mayor, said in talking about the Rams, that he would love to see the Chargers stay in San Diego, and the Raiders stay in Oakland. Translation, either Garcetti cares more about traffic than football, or he just might have ambitions for statewide office.

 

 

TSA said they found 2,653 guns last year at US airports, up 20% over last year, and more than 82% were loaded. Scary. What might be scarier is the possible number they didn’t find.

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Rule breakers

January 21, 2016

WR Josh Gordon, who was indefinitely suspended from the NFL for substance abuse violations involving marijuana and alcohol, has asked Roger Goodell for reinstatement. Of course had Gordon just beat people up to deal with his stress, he’d probably be on an active roster right now.

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Chip Kelly’s introductory press conference with Jed York and Trent Baalke was all warm and fuzzy this morning. Why did it feel a bit like watching the fourth wedding of some Hollywood star? ‪#‎unrealisticdreams‬?

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Donald Trump, asked about Sarah Palin as a possible running mate “”I don’t think she’d want to do it.” Translation – “I’m crazy but not that bat-shit crazy..

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Who knows whether this next possible “storm of the century” will live up to hype or just be another cause of unnecessary panic in the D.C. area. At least the Washington Redskins have done their part by not giving residents a playoff game and traffic to worry about.

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So in Pakistan, the Taliban claimed responsibility for an attack that killed 24 at a university. Awful, but I’m confused, are the Taliban now bad guys we are supporting, or  bad guys we are fighting?

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University of Florida CB Jalen Tabor was upset with football players not getting any pay other than a scholarship, food and some other benefits. So he tweeted “The SEC Made $527.4 Million in Total Revenue and Players Ain’t Get A Penny. Modern Form of Slavery.”
Now, all my friends know how much I “love” the SEC. But last I heard, no one trained hard and went through a very competitive voluntary recruiting process to become a slave.

 

So does the collapse in the price of oil mean that the GOP will no longer feel as compelled to invade every country that has it?

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A report says that at Mount St. Mary’s, a small Catholic university, president Simon Newson said this at a faculty meeting about struggling students and retention rates:   Faculty “think of students as cuddly bunnies,” but they “just have to drown the bunnies…put a Glock to their heads.”

Proving once again, that a PhD and a lofty title is no guarantee against ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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In New Orleans, a woman kept her gun under a pillow and it accidentally discharged last night, killing her 3-year-old grandson while the two were sleeping. ‪#‎ifonlytheboywasarmed‬

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Wonder what the conspiracy theorists who think ‪#‎Trump‬ is in the race to help ‪#‎Hillary‬ make of the ‪#‎Palin‬ endorsement?

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Walmart says that all of their over a million workers will receive “at least” a 2% raise. Wow. So with that 20 cents or so extra an hour maybe they’ll be able to buy some of the store’s products.

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The Dow was down as much as 565 points today but ended up down only 264 points. So I think I’ve got this figured out, the drop was all Obama’s fault but any bounce had nothing to do with him.

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ESPN’S OTL reports that the NFL sent three top health and safety officers to challenge the NIH on their proposed study on football and brain disease, even though the league has denied involvement. “I am shocked” said nobody.

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The Virginia legislature just killed a bill that would have decriminalized adultery. Since they are just across the river from DC is this VA’s way of discouraging members of Congress from living in the state?

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From my funny friend Alex Kaseberg,  “Caitlyn Jenner is writing her memoir about her transition to transgender. It will probably be a case of “He said/She said.”

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