Archive for March 2017

The end of the beginning.

March 30, 2017

Interesting how the pre-seasons for MLB and NBA are ending about the same time.

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So at what point do TV executives start worrying about a potental Warriors or Spurs vs Raptors Wizards or Celtics @NBA final?
Meanwhile,  CBS executives waking up in the middle of the night with visions of Oregon–South Carolina.
Albert L. Lord, a Penn State trustee reportedly wrote in an email that he is “running out of sympathy for 35 yr old, so-called victims (of Jerry Sandusky) with 7 digit net worth… Do not understand why they were so prominent in trial.”
Okay, what’s more unbelievable, that the guy actually thinks this, or that he’s stupid enough to put it in an email?
#NeverAskAWoman If she’s REALLY fine. If she says she’s “fine” you’re already toast.
So how long until Hawaii starts a tourism campaign advertising a “Trump-free” vacation? #Hawaiiboycott
McDonald’s says they will start making their Quarter-Pounders w/ fresh beef. So is this a change that the meat is fresh or that it’s beef?
Mike Pence is so pure he can’t be alone w/ any woman who isn’t his wife. But he has no problem being VP for a pussy-grabber.    Priorities.
Mike Pence won’t have dinner alone w/ a woman. Sir, I think I speak for millions of US women – “Your virtue is safe with us.” #notinterested
So the way Trump, Pence & rest of GOP are talking about women now, can only assume the witch trials commence by summer?
Trump’s now upset at some of his own party. “The Freedom Caucus will hurt the entire Republican agenda if they don’t get on the team, & fast. We must fight them, & Dems, in 2018!”
So would Trump like to put out a list of who he thinks IS on his team? Besides Ivanka and Jared.
As Trump says “We must fight” the Freedom Caucus and the Dems, paraphrased question of the day “Who’s we, orange man?
Trump attacks @NYtimes, wants to “change libel laws.” Amazing how someone so in love w/ 2nd amendment can so disregard the 1st.
Trump apparently threatened Mark Sanford with a Congressional primary challenger if he didn’t vote for Trumpcare. Never thought it could be done – but someone has put Mr. Appalachian Trail on the moral high road.

#MikeFlynn reportedly to testify ff granted immunity. Remember when these Russian espionage movies required scriptwriters? #passthepopcorn

Trump loves to talk about loyalty. But he basically fired #MikeFlynn. I’m sure Flynn didn’t take it personally. #passthepopcorn

Now that we’re officially in Spring, time to start a pool on which of his resorts Trump will dub the “Summer White House?  (assuming he makes it to Summer.)

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Not how you start…

March 30, 2017

Spurs had 16 point lead on the Warriors after 1st quarter and lost.  So will the league fine Popovich for resting his entire team for three quarters?

The Warriors-Spurs matchup, one of the marquee regular season games, tipped off at 930pm ET, 830p central.   Even Major League Baseball is thinking, don’t you care about your fans?

 

To be fair to Spurs that 8:30pm start meant 2nd half was past Gasol, Parker and Ginobili’s bedtimes.

T.J McDonald suspended 8 games by NFL after being arrested for driving under the influence of prescription drugs. Hmm, so had he hit a woman instead of driving would he have only gotten six?

Does it make you a snowflake if you get upset because your favorite #Starbucks is closing? Asking for a friend.

Consumer confidence reportedly up.   Or it’s just Americans feeling, “We might as well spend, we’re all going to die.”

Trump approval ratings now at 35% . Waiting for #SeanSpicer to explain how this is really like golf. Lowest scores win.

Not sure what was worst, that Matt Cain gave up 4 runs in 5.1 innings  for the SF Giants. Or that the outing actually lowered his Spring Training ERA to 7.82.

Trump & Christie pledge to fight opiod epidemic. No one told them GOP healthplan would strip coverage for mental health/addiction services?

Chris Christie met with Donald Trump at the White House today, the same day one of his former top aides was sentenced to 2 years in prison over “Bridgegate.” Only the little people pay penalties.

GOP-controlled Congress voted to let internet providers sell our browsing history.. So yep when it comes to privacy, these are the good old days

So with this new bill gutting internet privacy rights is it too much to ask that Trump has filed his taxes online?

Apparently none of the White House staff will attend annual correspondents’ dinner in “solidarity” with President Trump, Translation, “solidarity” means “keeping your job.”

#Trump asked women today “Have you heard of #SusanBAnthony? No doubt he heard she & #FrederickDouglass are being recognized more & more

Who says Trump is not a uniter? CNN reporting how the GOP vote to repeal internet privacy rules, a bill expected to be signed by the President, has been “panned by both the editorial board of The New York Times and by commenters on conservative media outlet Breitbart News.”

“The Classic” concert just announced this summer will feature the Eagles, Steely Dan, Doobie Brothers, Fleetwood Mac, Journey, and Earth Wind & Fire. So based on the target audience demographic assume all tickets will include a senior citizen discount.

Jeb Bush on Donald Trump “He should stop saying things that aren’t true.” Would Jeb care to opine on what things Trump says that are true?

#Hawaii judge issues an injunction against Trump’s travel ban. Too soon to start a pool on the timing of #FakeState tweets?

Ivanka Trump gets a White House desk & top level security clearance. Wonder if Donald will invite Tiffany to the Easter Egg Hunt?

Iowa GOP bill would allow parents to stop abortion if “woman is less than eighteen years of age or unmarried.” #Bridgetothe19thcentury

 

 

 

And with Opening Day almost upon us.   Thanks to JD for this Carnac moment I had forgotten  “Another favorite Carnac memory: The answer is “Catch-22.” The question is “What do the Los Angeles Dodgers do with 50 fly balls?”

Going, going, not quite gone.

March 28, 2017

The Raiders sent out an email today to Season Ticket Holders offering to let them put down a deposit on tickets in Las Vegas.

 

Isn’t this sort of like your significant other telling you he/she is leaving you for someone else as soon as they get their home built, but she’d love to have you come to the housewarming party.

 

A Nevada brothel owner today said he will open a Raiders-themed bordello in 2020. Meaning that unlike Oakland fans, new Las Vegas fans of the team can at least get value for money while being screwed.

Average high temperature in Las Vegas in September, 95%, down from a 103% in August. But hey, fire up those grills for tailgates. #Raiders

As Raiders prepare to pack up & move, a good time to remember that #SFGiants just paid off their PRIVATELY FUNDED stadium.

Lonzo Ball and Markelle Fultz are likely to be the top 2 chosen in the 2017 NBA draft. Today in an interview, Ball said he can “lead a team better, and that “Markelle’s a great player, but I feel I’m better than him.”
Sounds like the apple doesn’t swagger far from the tree.

The world’s largest dinosaur footprint just found in ‘Australia’s Jurassic Park’. Was it from a pickup game involving Tim Duncan?

 

Heard a commercial for FanDuel fantasy golf. Thinking if you seriously play fantasy golf for money you just might have a gambling problem.

 

White House says Trump turned down invite from #Nationals to throw out 1st pitch Opening Day. Bummer. Would have been Bigliest boos ever.

Has it occurred to anyone in Trump administration that Mexico builds tunnels a lot faster than we could build a wall?

Bill O’Reilly insulted Maxine Waters’ hair. Can someone get Bill drunk and ask him what he really thinks of Donald Trump’s hair?

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Johnny Carson as Carnac would do answers first, then questions. An old favorite -“UCLA.” The question – “What happens when smog clears over Los Angeles?”
Doesn’t seem so funny when Trump signs an executive order getting rid of regulations for clean-air.

President signs  EO gutting fed regulations against climate change. If global warming floods FloridaL could it please start with a Trump golf course?.

#TrumpAFamousQuote “Loving myself means never having to say I’m sorry.”

Supreme Court ruled 9-0 w/ Paula Jones & Clinton that Pres could be sued. Trump now filing motion to overturn. #Fakecourt tweet in 3.2.1…

CNN reports Sean Spicer refused to say who signed Nunes onto the White House grounds late at night, “as would be required protocol.”
Standby for the Trump Executive Order outlawing “required protocol.”

The GAO (Government Accountability Office) is apparently going to look into security costs for Trump’s Mar-A-Lago trips and see if he, as promised, is paying the treasury for profits his hotels make from foreign government visits.
Standby for Trump signing an EO to defund the GAO in 3.2.1….

Quote of the day “There was a very serious effort made by Mr. Putin and his government, his organization, to interfere in major ways with our basic, fundamental democratic processes. In some quarters that would be considered an act of war.”
But who listens to crazy liberals like Dick Cheney?

 

Checkpoint Charlie museum honors those who died trying to scale the Berlin wall for a better life. Will Mexico build museum if Trump ever builds his wall?

 

 

Lonzo Ball and Markelle Fultz are likely to be the top 2 chosen in the 2017 NBA draft. Today in an interview, Ball said he can “lead a team better, and that “Markelle’s a great player, but I feel I’m better than him.”
Sounds like the apple doesn’t swagger far from the tree.

Cavalier treatment

March 27, 2017

It’s beginning to look possible that even without Tim Duncan the San Antonio Spurs are a pretty good basketball team.

(San Antonio 103- Cleveland 74.)

San Antonio assistant coach Becky Hammon apparently turned down the head coaching job with the women’s basketball team at the University of Florida. Clearly the idea of a woman coach staying in their locker room didn’t hurt the Spurs too badly tonight against the Cavs.

 

Looking at way UConn women are cutting a swath through their NCAA tournament you almost wonder if they should have been seeded w/ the men.

#Raiders moving to Vegas. Still may be cheaper for Oakland fans to fly to Las Vegas for a game than buy tickets in #Warriors new SF arena.

Jed York, on the Raiders move “I don’t think it’s a big win for the 49ers.” Well, yeah, Oakland fans have gotten used to watching a professional team.

Only vote against #Raiders move came from #Dolphins. Did Miami owner have dreams of moving to Vegas himself?

 

Being a San Francisco Bay Area fan of the Saints and Spurs, there are some advantages: Teams can’t break your heart by moving out of town. The SF Giants on the other hand, better stay put.

Cleveland LT Joe Thomas says no one has signed Colin Kaepernick for this year because he’s a “distraction.” Hmm, the way the Browns play guessing their fans could use all the distractions they can get.

Now it comes out that Nunes says he was on the White House grounds the day before revealing Trump surveillance info. because he was just looking for a safe place to go over the information.
If this were a movie script it might be rejected as too unbelievable.

I will believe airlines have a real dress code first time they kick some man off flight for wearing inappropriate clothing

The Dow is down for an 8th straight day. #WWTB – Who will Trump blame?

The Trump administration wants $1 billion funding just to cover 62 miles of their proposed border wall. $1 billion?! All of a sudden California’s proposed high-speed rail is looking like a bargain.

Jeff Sessions says “sanctuary cities must end.” So anyone who wants protection after committing a crime better join Trump administration.

Now Tomi Lahren has been suspended permanently from the Blaze for saying she was pro-choice. So has her slippery slope to liberalism begun?

In Russia, opposition leader Alexei Navalny was sentenced today Monday to 15 days in jail and fined $350 for leading anti-govt protests in Moscow. Wonder if Trump has called Putin saying “How do you do that?”

Maybe you should dance like there’s nobody watching. but that doesn’t mean you should govern that way.

What were the odds?

March 27, 2017

Roger Goodell seems to be so much in favor ot the #Raiders going to #LasVegas you almost wonder what kind of odds he got on the move.

Didn’t really care between #SouthCarolina & #Florida. But going to miss watching Canyon Barry shoot underhanded free throws. @NBA take note

This year’s Final Four features all teams from coastal states – Washington, Oregon and the Carolinas. No team from the Midwest or Kentucky.  Is this somehow still  Obama’s fault?

 

In Lexington, University of Kentucky students rioted after losing their Elite 8 March Madness game by lighting things on fire and chanting “f–k UNC” Just imagine what they might have done if the Wildcats had won?

=

Tara Vanderveer would probably think coaching #Stanford men’s basketball would be at best a lateral move, but Cardinal could use her. #WomensFinalFour

United denied boarding to girls wearing… leggings?  But hey, it’s an about an  offensive look they should refuse many male tourists boarding in shorts.

And okay, I get it, the girls were employee children and there is a dress code when using free tickets. But United’s Twitter feed didn’t try to strike a conciliatory or explanatory town, just doubled down on the airline’s “conditions of carriage”  #wannagetaway?

Whoever is running #United‘s Twitter account is doing a good enough PR job to be considered for position as assistant to Sean Spicer

 

Uber halted self-driving car testing in Phoenix following crash involving 1 of their SUVs. Cars still probably safer than most snowbirds.

15 people shot, 1 fatally in #Cincinnati. Not terrorism, just a good old-fashioned American night with guns. Move along nothing to see here.

John Kasich on a possible 2020 Presidential run “I’m not really interested in running for political office again. You don’t close the door on anything, but I don’t have my eyes on that.”
Translation, only if I think I can win.

Wait, Kellyanne Conway gets called out on ethics violations, justifiably for promoting Ivanka’s clothes & then President tells us to “Watch @JudgeJeanine on @FoxNews?” #WTF

Reince Priebus “I think it’s time to potentially get a few moderate Democrats on board as well.” Does he think they’ll be easier to bully?

Now talk of Trump trying to work w/ Dems. Yeah, it’s going to go real well when Bannon says “You have no choice you have to vote for this bill.”

An ill wind

March 26, 2017

The #1 seed Jayhawks, who’d breezed through their first three games,  were upset in basically a home game in Kansas City by Oregon.  Last time things were so unexpectedly turned around for Kansas, a tornado and witches were involved.

So two of the Final Four men’s basketball teams  are from the West Coast. Are we sure this result can’t be negated by the electoral college?

Xavier vs Gonzaga and Kansas vs Oregon for berths in Final Four and the games were on… TBS?   This is the same television brilliance MLB uses to grow their fan base.

Another disappointing night for NBA fans, the #Knicks weren’t resting their starters

Knicks center Joakim Noah, who hasn’t played in over a month, was suspended 20 games by the NBA for a banned supplement. Well, Barnum & Bailey Ringling Bros may be gone, but the circus is alive and well at Madison Square Garden..

(and then after the Knicks outscored the Spurs by 14 in the 3rd to cut the lead to 4…. well, anyone but me want to hear what Popovich really said to his team during the break?)

Roger Goodell in a letter to Oakland’s mayor said he thinks the city has yet to find “a viable solution” to keeping the Raiders. And then no doubt when the 3rd NFL team moves in the last two years Goodell will no doubt proclaim the importance of fan loyalty.

Oops, ads congratulating GOP on repealing Obamacare actually aired last night. Did they also congratulate Super Bowl Champ Atlanta Falcons?

Kris Jenner is apparently shopping a new Kardashian cartoon. Wait, aren’t the Kardashians already a cartoon?

A man was taken into custody after shooting two people, one fatally, on a bus in Las Vegas today, shutting down the Strip for hours. Police say it was not terrorism. But the horror, thousands of people couldn’t get to their sports books and slot machines.

Trump tweet “ObamaCare will explode and we will all get together and piece together a great healthcare plan for THE PEOPLE. Do not worry!”
Just wondering, now that he’s in charge, why didn’t Trump offer that “great healthcare plan” the first time?

Dems & GOP now both realizing, it’s a lot easier to be united against legislation than it is actually to craft such legislation.

Trump “we learned a lot about loyalty.” Yep, Amazing thing, when you throw people under buses they don’t usually recover & bring you flowers.

As Ivanka moves into White House office wonder again how many voted against Hillary thinking  one family shouldn’t have that much power.

Joe Biden, on his decision not to run:, “I regret not being President right now.”

And millions of Americans are thinking “Not as much as WE regret you not being President right now.”

Mike Pence said today Trump “won’t rest” until Obamacare is dismantled. Right and Trump’s time on the golf course will be as helpful as OJ’s was in his search for the real killers.

Trump loves celebrities and social media. But maybe he shouldn’t have used Charlie Sheen as a role model for #Winning?

Healthcare bridge, one no Trump?

March 24, 2017

Lonzo says he is one-and-done at UCLA. In related news, Trumpcare never had a realistic chance and water is wet.

Meanwhile, the only exciting game out of Friday night’s Sweet Sixteen matchups – Wisconsin vs Florida – finished after midnight on the east coast.  So maybe NCAA with basketball really is considering themselves a major professional sport.

Pirates infielder Jung Ho Kang may miss the 2017 MLB season due to his being denied a US visa, possibly due to a DUI arrest. Yep, if you want to be a star athlete who drinks and drives, you better be born here in the USA.

Today is #NationalCheesesteakDay To be followed tomorrow by National EKG day?

USA Today reports that Baywatch’s David Hasselhoff now has his own cruise will host a five-night “fan cruise” this Fall on Costa Cruises. Think someone could manage to push him into a lifeboat?

Former Penn State president Graham Spanier was convicted today of one count of child endangerment. He had chosen not to report Sandusky to the state Department of Public Welfare, despite the report from Mike McQueary about seeing him in the showers with a young boy. Apparently Spanier plans to appeal. On what grounds? That he thought he was running a Catholic university?

CNN reports Trump aide says President “agitated” by Trumpcare bill process which he thinks is all “political.”   Hello…it’s politics.

GOP just changed their Trumpcare Facebook status to “It’s complicated.”

Is even Paul Ryan starting to think he might have been better off with Hillary in the White House

 

If GOP willing to eliminate all gender based healthcare from coverage with Trumpcare we could talk. Prostrate exams & ED drugs to start.

Curiously enough, pulling out is also the GOP’s new birth control strategy. #KilltheBill

Sean Spicer  “If you’re an older man, you can generally say you’re not going to need maternity care.” So how old was Trump when Barron was born?

Right about now, Obama might be forgiven a small smirk.

Paul Ryan “We’re going to be living w/ Obamacare for the foreseeable future.” Well, better than dying w/ Trumpcare in the foreseeable future.

While Dems celebrate, if some party leaders or wannabe leaders have ideas to tweak Obamacare, it  would be excellent time to put them forward.

Amazing that Trump just didn’t rename #Obamacare & take the credit. Though no doubt that’s his plan B.

 

Trump today “when you get no votes from the other side, it’s a very difficult situation.” And how big is @BarackObama’s smile right now?

You’d think with such small hands Trump wouldn’t be so quick to point his small fingers?

 

Thinking Ryan had a lot more fun when he could blame all the GOP failures on Obama.

Latest leak #fakenews CNN reports Trump is upset that his son-in-law and senior adviser was not around during this crucial week.” (Jared and family were skiing in Aspen.)
Actually this one has the ring of truth, if Trump is angry, it wouldn’t be at himself, or heaven forbid his perfect daughter.

Trump now to a Wash Post reporter “As you know, I’ve been saying for years that the best thing is to let Obamacare explode and then go make a deal with the Democrats and have one unified deal.”

So if that’s the best thing, why have wasted all this precious time and effort trying to get Trumpcare through? Why not have used the HUGE power of the Presidency to tell Ryan to stand down weeks ago? #alternativerationalizations