Archive for October 2013

« Left Coast Sports Babe home page
« Older Entries

Morning after of the nearly dead.

October 31, 2013

Scariest thing for many of us on Halloween. No more MLB baseball games this season. But only 104 days until pitchers and catchers report.

–

In Mexico, November 1 is known as “Day of the Dead.”    In the U.S., it’s “National Half-Price Candy Day.”

–

All the talk about Halloween being such an unhealthy holiday because of kids going out to get and eat bags full of candy.  So what’s the most popular pre-Trick-or-treating meal in the U.S?’    Pizza

–

Google says they are “outraged” by alleged NSA snooping. They say if anyone is snooping on their customers it should be Google themselves.

–

Some people say we have children as an excuse to buy toys at Christmas/Hanukkah. Looking at pictures today I’d say there’s an equally good chance some people have children just to come up with adorable Halloween costumes.

–

Hallmark has changed an “ugly sweater” Christmas ornament they were selling from saying “Don we now our gay apparel,” to “Don we now our fun apparel.” Reportedly due to consumer backlash. But was it homophobic backlash, or backlash from gays who said they would never be caught dead in an ugly sweater?

Image

–

Dell Computers is admitting that some of its new laptops smell like a cat litter box. Are they sure it’s the machine and not the latest version of Windows.

–

An NFL game ended Thursday night in overtime on a safety? That’s almost as unbelievable as a baseball game ending on an obstruction call.

–

Kim Kardashian told Jay Leno her selfie in a skimpy swimsuit was her “big, like, middle finger to the world.” I thought the Kardashians themselves were a big middle finger to the world.,

–

So the new FAA regulations say passengers will be able to use their cellphones on planes with the doors closed, but not for phone calls nor text or email. And of course all passengers will obey that directive….

–

A number of media outlets are trying to make something out of the fact that Pamela Anderson cut her long blonde hair into a pixie cut. Perhaps they are oblivious to the fact that most men don’t pay attention to Pamela for her hair….?

–

Now there’s medical marijuana for pets. So what’s the next product, cat and dog food flavored like Doritos?

–

From T.C.  “Last night, the Red Sox won the World Series at home in Boston for the first time since 1918 vs the Cubs. Baseball fans were shocked, the Cubs were in a World Series?”

.

From Bill Littlejohn   “O.J. Simpson can still vote in Florida while thousands of others can’t—-they’re hoping that some day he can find 2000’s ‘real voters'”

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: Be the first to comment

It’s over.

October 30, 2013

Okay, congratulations to the Boston Red Sox. But I think I speak for mothers everywhere when I say “Can you shave now?

–

Everyone’s happy in Boston tonight. Well, except scalpers who had game seven tickets.

–

Will Tim McCarver’s next act be telling Americans how much more he knows about retirement than any of us?

–

Although the Red Sox were World Series champions in 2004 and 2007, fans in Boston are talking about what a historic occasion this is because the team hasn’t won the Series clincher AT HOME since 1918. And Cubs fans are thinking “Just STFU.”

–

Thinking if the Angels’ Mike Scioscia had pitched to Barry Bonds like the Cardinals’ Mike Matheny pitched to David Ortiz, the SF Giants would have a third trophy with little flags at A T & Park.

–

The World Series beat MNF in the ratings. Which could be a sign that Americans really do consider baseball the national pastime. Or that most of us don’t give a damn about the Seahawks and Rams.

–

Bob Barker is returning to the “Price is Right” for his 90th birthday. It will be like he never left. Especially for Bob himself, who probably won’t remember leaving.

–

The Miami Dolphins had to fix their cheerleader web site yesterday because it was sending mobile users to a pornography site. Presumably they noticed the problem when traffic to the cheerleader site went up 1000%?

–

London archaeologists just unearthed a Roman eagle statue that they believe dates from the 1st or 2nd century. Apparently the sculpture hasn’t been seen since it was featured on an early episode of “Larry King Live.”

–

A Wisconsin man was arrested after coming home drunk from a Halloween Party and dangling a child upside down from an overpass. Presume he was dressed up as Michael Jackson?

–

Kanye West, referring to Kim’s near-nude swimsuit selfie, “Michelle Obama cannot Instagram a pic like what my girl Instagrammed the other day.” “What an a**hole,” said most politicians on both sides of the aisle. “Uh, I’m willing to  chair the investigation of  this picture,” said Bill Clinton.

–

The last funeral home in Palo Alto, California is closing tomorrow and the property has been bought by Yahoo’s Marissa Mayer. Insert Yahoo Mail joke here:

–

A Fargo, N.D. woman named “Cheryl,” told a local radio station that when “fat” kids come by, instead of candy on Halloween she’ll hand out letters saying “Your child is, in my opinion, moderately obese and should not be consuming sugar and treats.” Why do I feel confident “Cheryl” is single?

–

Apparently in Denver authorities dealing with legalized marijuana are grappling with some who are okay with the law, but object to the smell. So they are trying to regulate smoking in open areas. Maybe when Denver figures it out they can pass the same laws about perfume.

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Indifference

October 29, 2013

Tuesday is National Cat Day. And most cats are thinking, isn’t EVERY day National Cat Day?

 

Tuesday was also the NBA’s opening night. Which means we’re only 6-7 months from when the games start getting meaningful.

–

For all those baseball fans who realize sadly that Wednesday could be the last MLB  game of the year, there’s a silver lining: It’s also the last time we have to listen to Tim McCarver.

–

San Diego State played their third annual Halloween baseball game Sunday, with everyone on the field in costume. Big deal, say Cubs fans. For 100 years we’ve been watching guys dress up like professional baseball players.

–

Ah that Lane Kiffin legacy. According to CBS Sports, USC is projected for a bowl this year. Except that it’s Dec. 21, the New Mexico Bowl, against San Jose State….

(Says my friend Gib Worley, Kiffin did less with a pack of Trojans than Sean Kemp.)

–

–

Detroit Lions WR Nate Burleson, who broke his arm in a car accident caused by trying to save a pizza from sliding off the passenger seat, says he’s received a year’s free pizza from DiGiorno. Uh, except if Burleson has this much trouble driving with a pizza, do the Lions really want him messing with an oven?

 

–

Jeb Bush made a speech last night where he decried “crony capitalism.” And we thought Abbott and Costello had a hard time keeping straight fares during “Who’s on first.”

 

–

The Cardinals’ plane was stuck for hours  on the tarmac in St. Louis.    Has Will Middlebrooks been charged with obstruction?

 

Golden Gloves announced for baseball tonight. Not a single winner on the West Coast. So apparently MLB voters have as hard a time staying up to watch those 1030p East Coast games (or highlights) as the folks from ESPN.

–

Following his latest arrest, Chris Brown has entered rehab. Must mean he’s serious. About avoiding prison.

–

Johnny Manziel, asked who he’d most like to party with, first came up with… Charlie Sheen. Let’s see, time to open the pools. Date Manziel signs his first NFL contract? Date of his next arrest? Pick both and make it a daily double.

–

 

Just as an aside to this whole NSA tapped cellphone mess, somewhere is George W. Bush thinking “oh, so that’s why Cheney told me Angela Merkel liked having her shoulders rubbed?”

–

Currently dismissed Notre Dame QB Everett Golson in an SI interview. “I had poor judgment on a test It wasn’t due to poor grades or anything like that.” Asked “Did you cheat on a test?” “Yeah, something like that.” “SOMETHING” like that? Since Golson is planning to reapply in 2014 and play again, maybe he should figure that the rules might be a little more specific..

–

The federal administrator in charge of the Obamacare site apologized today and said “HealthCare.gov can and will be fixed.” And wonder how many in the GOP said “Hmm, time to hire some (more?) hackers..”

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

Comments: 4 Comments

Dispirit of St. Louis

October 28, 2013
Cardinals lost 3-1 to the Red Sox.  Rams had a  sure comeback fall short at the 2 yard line. Tonight’s headline “Dispirit of St. Louis.”

–

Nah, there’s no bias on Fox World Series coverage. Joe Buck – “The National League has won the last three World Series, including these Cardinals in 2011.” Would it kill him to mention the other teams, or rather, team?

–

Tim McCarver and Joe Buck were so convinced the Red Sox shouldn’t have been holding Wong on last night, we’re lucky they didn’t miss the end of the game altogether with another in-dugout interview or something.

–

–

How boring. The only big mistakes in tonight’s #WorldSeries game were hanging curveballs.

 

–

Why is ANYONE still pitching to #DavidOrtiz in this World Series? #insanity

–

A 31-year-old Texas man survived being struck by lighting twice last weekend. First when he was standing under a tree, then when he dropped to his knees and was struck again. The man says he believes God kept him alive, and he will start going to church more. Uh, maybe during storms he should start standing under trees less.

–

Rick Santorum said of Ted Cruz’s efforts that resulted in a government shutdown “In the end, he did more harm” to the GOP than good. Well, Santorum ought to know, since in 2006 his 18% loss was one of the largest defeats by a Republican senator trying to be re-elected in U.S. history.

–

Ryanair has released their annual calendar featuring scantily-clad flight attendants, which is a fundraiser for cancer research. Could be worse. The discount carrier could demand passengers either wear minimal clothes or pay a fee to cut down on weight in the cabin.

–

From my funny friend Howard Fox  “The other day in Washington, a boy’s dog was blamed for starting an apartment fire. Unfortunately for the boy, his homework survived.”

–

Miley Cyrus was quoted in Cosmopolitan as saying “I feel like I’m kind of an underdog in a cool way. Like, society wants to shut me down.” “Shut her down?” More like “Just make her go away.”

–

Not sure if Stanford football is as good as their ranking, but they and other Pac 12 teams rank higher in the BCS than the Coaches’ and AP polls. Makes sense. the computers don’t go to bed before the second half of all these West Coast night games.

 

–

A federal judge ruled that Texas’s new abortion restrictions are unconstitutional. Which means probably that some in the GOP will try to start blocking more judicial appointments over Obamacare or Benghazi.

–

Marco Rubio now favors a House piecemeal approach over the comprehensive immigration reform passed by the Senate earlier this year. Not that unusual, except that the Senate bill…. was one that Rubio largely authored.

–

–

BYU, over 98% Mormon, has already accepted a bid to the Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl in San Francisco. Unhappiest people about this invitation? San Francisco bar owners.

–

The Carolina Panthers’ Mike Mitchell, who got his 5th fine of the year last week, $7,875 for taunting, claims the NFL and Roger Goodell are targeting him. Well if they weren’t before, they probably are now.

 

–

”

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 6 Comments

Fat lady singing?

October 27, 2013

The way these World Series endings are going,  the fat lady won’t sing, she’ll slip on a banana peel.

–

So what will end tomorrow’s World Series game? A wild pitch, a balk, batting out of order?

–

So did the #Cardinals and #RedSox sign a secret contract promising at least one brain freeze per #WorldSeries game?

–

The theme of this year’s World Series? “It’s a simple game, you throw the ball you hit the ball, sometimes you catch the ball.”

–

The NY Jets have had a few weeks without a quarterback circus. Break time is apparently over.

–

Just how bad is the NFL Least? The 2-6 NY Giants are only two games out of first.

–

So much for another BCS title game between two SEC teams. It’s not even November and the conference only has one undefeated team and two one-loss teams left. Wonder if they’ve asked the NCAA about starting the playoff system a year early.

–

Chris Brown was arrested this morning for felony assault. So congratulations to all those who had October 27 in the pool.

–

Well, for all those tired of discussing football’s “push” rule ad infinitum, now we can discuss baseball’s obstruction rule ad infinitum….

–

A man was arrested yesterday at JFK Airport for checking three illegal weapons plus a loaded rifle in his luggage. On top of a fifth gun that was legal. Wonder if the airline refunded his baggage fee.

–

How ugly are the Red Sox playoff beards? Parents of teenagers and college students may be so relieved their children aren’t emulating the players that their reaction to another way of standing out might be “Oh, it’s only a tattoo.”

–

Dick Cheney is predicting his daughter Liz will unseat Mike Enzi, the sitting GOP Wyoming senator in next year’s primary. “The fact of the matter is, Washington is not going to elect the next senator from Wyoming, the people of Wyoming will elect the senator.” Interesting choice of words considering Liz Cheney just moved to Jackson Hole from a D.C. suburb last year.

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 2 Comments

You have to hand it to him.

October 27, 2013

David Ortiz played  first base last night in the World Series So after the controversy about Jon Lester, this will make Big Papi the second Boston player with a possible foreign substance on his hand – his glove.

(wonder if he had to ask a clubhouse assistant, which hand?)

 

Wonder how often umpire Jim Joyce has thought he’s tired of mostly being known for the blown call in what have been Armando Galarraga’s perfect game. (At least last night wasn’t game 7. And this time the call was right.)

 

Facebook finally has a working edit function to fix typos in posts. Dyslexics and overly fast typists of the world are untied in happiness!

 

–

Bill Sharman, 87, a Hall of Fame player with the Celtics and coach with the Lakers, passed away Friday. Less well known, however, is how much fun Sharman had playing youth pickup games with Greg Oden.

–

Nick Saban has taken away seating privileges for some fraternities and other groups at Alabama’s Bryant-Denny stadium the students involved weren’t staying for the whole games. Season ticket holders are hoping the Los Angeles Dodgers don’t ever adopt this idea.

–

Jeff Garcia, 43, says about potentially returning to the NFL, “there’s a fire that still burns.”. Is he sure that’s not heartburn or arthritis?

(my friend Jon N. suggests, “If it’s the burning that is driving the decision, he should try a full course of penicillin before making any serious choices.”)

–

Joe Montana, on the 49ers moving to Santa Clara, complained now San Francisco “made a terrible effort” to keep the team in the city. Wonder why the legendary QB is speaking up now? I don’t suppose the fact that Montana himself has been unable to reach a deal with Santa Clara officials about building a hotel-restaurant next to the new stadium has anything to do with it.

–

In a Big 12 matchup, Oklahoma handed Texas Tech their first loss. So have to figure Sooners fans got all kinds of bouquets from fans of 1-loss SEC teams?

–

Roger Goodell says he wants NFL teams in both London and L.A. “but it doesn’t matter which one is first.” And London and L.A. are thinking “You take the Jaguars, no, after you, no, after you….”

 

Duke 13, Virginia Tech 10. And millions of sports fans around the U.S. are saying “So who cares about pre-season first quarter college basketball scores.”

–

Ted Cruz said the country is “facing a new paradigm in politics and it is the paradigm of the rise of the grassroots which has Washington terrified.” Maybe, but if President Obama used the word “paradigm” FOX News etc would have immediately accused him of being elitist.

 

(and wonder how many Cruz supporters have any idea what he meant.)

–

Darrell Wallace Jr. won a trucks race at Martinsville Speedway in Virginia, the first black driver in almost 50 years to win on NASCAR’s national level. Number one reaction – NASCAR has black drivers?l

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

Comments: 3 Comments

Friday Night No Lights ?

October 25, 2013

So tonight, no MLB postseason baseball, no NFL football. In other words, recent business as usual in Southern California.

–

And so far, two very sloppy games. But then you can’t spell #WorldSeries without “E”s.

–

In a recent interview, Brett Favre said ‘God only knows the toll’ (with his concussions) and admitted forgetting some details about his family life. Of course, there’s a name for people who forget that kind of detail. They’re called “men.”

–

The GOP keeps attacking Obamacare. In part no doubt because they think Americans would be better off with the great Republican alternative healthcare reform plan that the party has put forward in great detail…. Oops, never mind.

–

Cory Vaughn, a Mets minor leaguer currently playing for the Scottsdale Scorpions in the Arizona Fall League, is recovering after being bit in the leg by a scorpion. Good thing the kid doesn’t play for a team affiliated with the Detroit Tigers.

–

Ted Cruz has railed against other members of Congress and staffers for accepting federal health insurance support. No doubt he’d prefer to pay his own way, except it turns out that Ted gets health insurance though his wife, who is an executive at Goldman Sachs….

–

Kraft has recalled some of their cheese products after they changed color and showed signs of spoilage before their expiration date. Shocking !   Kraft actually created cheese products that had an expiration date?

–

According to USA Today, U.S. Patent and Trademark Office received a registration application for the name “Washington Bravehearts” for the purpose of “Entertainment in the nature of football games.” The Redskins claim they have nothing to do with it. Makes sense, it’s the team’s long suffering fans who truly need to be bravehearted.

–

The GOP chair of a North Carolina county precinct apparently was forced resign yesterday after an interview aired on the Daily Show where he defended tougher voter ID rules and said “if it hurts a bunch of lazy blacks who want the government to give them everything so be it.” Wonder if he had to resign for the racism or the stupidity .

–

Now that pictures have surfaced of Doug Gansler’s hanging out at his son’s graduation party with underage drinkers, the Maryland attorney general (and gubernatorial candidate) is saying, several days later, that he made a mistake by not trying to stop the party. Uh, what he means is, he made a mistake by not realizing these days that EVERYTHING gets posted online.

–

This is the same Gansler who made a public service commercial saying parents are the leading influence on their kids’ behavior when it comes to alcohol, noting, “It’s never too early to talk to your kids about smart ways to say, `No.”‘.   Uh and it’s also never too early to say “I made a mistake.”

–

Rumors out of Tampa say the Buccaneers coach Greg Schiano may be fired before the end of the year. In Schiano’s favor, not sure who Tampa Bay could get instead willing to take over that mess.

–

 

Ah yes, the private sector. United Airlines cancels a flight from SF to JFK tomorrow for “airport conditions.” Computer doesn’t rebook passengers. No options within several hours. Called them to negotiate Newark as an option. While talking to the agent, United puts in a new flight SF to JFK a few minutes after the cancelled flight. Still doesn’t rebook cancelled passengers on it. In fact, says the flight is sold out in the booked class. 15 minutes later supervisor gets it done manually. (So did the ACA designers use an airline website model?)

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Rule Britannia?

October 24, 2013

The NFL keeps increasing the number of games in London in hopes of basing a team there someday. Might not be as hard to get players to move to England as the league might think – the country would have free healthcare for all their children and baby mamas.

–

Apparently after Sam Bradford’s season-ending injury, the St. Louis Rams reached out to… Brett Favre. But the 44-year-old said that he really is retired now. “Couldn’t you have given it one more chance?” said every comedy writer in the country?

 

Alabama coach Nick Saban is complaining that Crimson Tide fans are leaving at halftime. Maybe it would help if the team scheduled opponents who would keep the game competitive after the first quarter.

 

–

What’s scarier? That the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are now 0-7? Or that they probably aren’t the worst NFL team in Florida?

–

Former Oregon Ducks TE Colt Lyerla, who left the team Oct 6 for what he said were “personal reason”, was arrested last night for cocaine possession. When he quit, Lyerla said that he “would pursue an NFL career.” Sounds like he’s well on his way to being league ready.

–

Cal’s current football player graduation rate last in the conference and last among all BCS schools. Gosh, who’d a thunk the Bears would be the Pac 12 team to beat SEC teams at something?

–

Where’s a good tornado when you need one? The Westboro Baptist Church plans to picket the World Series because Americans “worship the false idol of baseball.” Silly silly hateful bigots. Most Americans do not worship baseball. They worship football.

 

Apparently a breathalyzer test is being developed that will catch stoned drivers, as opposed to those might have just smoked the day before. Of course, it might be cheaper to just hold up a bag of Doritos, and see if the suspect snatches it from the officer’s hand.

–

Why do I have a feeling this may be one of the understatements of the year. After Spirit Airlines delayed flights up to 12 hours for engine inspections, an airport spokesman said “there were several dozen people in Terminal 4 overnight. There were no arrests. Some did lose their tempers, but it was all worked out amicably.”

–

Hope game 2 of the World Series is more competitive. The way they played last night the St. Louis Cardinals won’t be able plausibly to sell “game-used” gloves.

—

A STL minor league pitcher accused Boston pitcher Jon Lester of doctoring the ball, and pictures do show something in Lester’s glove, though the Cardinals never complained during the game. But come on, the Red Sox cheating? Just who would they have to think they are? The Patriots?

The average postseason baseball game has gone 3 hrs & 22 min. And fans of #Yankees #Redsox games are thinking, how do they play that fast?

 

–

This Carlos Beltran is a pretty tough dude. If he were healthy all the way through 2011, would the SF Giants be sitting on a “three-peat?”

–

Just maybe it is not a good idea to throw strikes to David Ortiz with runners on base in this postseason?

–

For those who think I only pick on the SEC, Oregon and USC, this gem is from ASU via a friend ‘

“”I don’t know what that word is man. Arizona St. education, bro’. Break that one down for me.” Dustin Pedroia

What’s that? Oh, the word that confused him was “validity”.

–

 

 

A couple was fined $250 each for having oral sex on a flight from Medford to Las Vegas. No word on how much the airline charged passengers for an entertainment fee.

–

From BIll Littlejohn:

Marlins President David Samson predicts that his team will be playing October baseball next year.Boy, those Arizona Winter Leagues are starting earlier and earlier”
 

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: Be the first to comment

World not so Serious?

October 23, 2013

If the Boston Red Sox win the World Series will their MVP turn out to be the most famous beard since Katie Holmes?

 

Are the Cardinals trying to vie with the SF 49ers this week in appealing to British fans who normally follow soccer? This might explain the “no hands” defense.

–

#SFGiants in the news: Team re-signs Lincecum and Kanye proposes to Kim at A T & T. Wonder which relationship will last longer.

–

The World Series is supposed to be the best two teams in baseball playing each other? Tonight looks more like the baseball equivalent of one of those great SEC-cupcake matchups.

–

And somewhere scattered across the U.S. Pirates and Dodgers players watched WS game 1, and thought “How the bleep did we lose to these guys?”

–

Many Americans profess complete disinterest in the christening of Prince George, because they can’t imagine caring about someone who will only rule due to an accident of birth. They’d much prefer to speculate over whether Jeb Bush might run in 2016 against Hillary Clinton.

–

The SF Giants aren’t saying exactly how much Kanye West paid to rent A T and T Park for his proposal. I’m just wondering, how many celebrity proposals and weddings will it take to pay for a power hitting left fielder?

–

The NBA owners has decided to change their playoff Finals format from 2-3-2 to 2-2-1-1-1, with an extra day off between Games 6 and 7. Another small step on the way to making the Finals “The Summer Classic.”

–

The Cleveland Browns are the latest NFL team to bench their starting QB for poor performance. And several others are barely hanging on. Starting to think maybe God really wants to see the return of Tim Tebow.

–

You can’t make this “stuff” up dept: Three elementary children were treated for minor injuries sustained during a school safety demonstration in Southern California – the injuries apparently resulted from a panic when a police officer’s gun discharged.

–

McDonald’s is rebranding ther “Dollar Menu” to the “Dollar Menu & More” items at $1, $2 and up to $5. Guess the chain is hoping Americans are as good at math as they are at making healthy food choices.

–

Oops. A University of Iowa math T.A.meant to email students some math problem answers, but instead accidentally sent nude photos of herself and her boyfriend. Once again prompting millions of men to ask “where were these teachers when I was in college?”

–

From Gary M.  “Apparently Kanye West proposed to Kim Kardashian Monday night at A T and T Park.  One of the few ‘locals’ to score at AT&T this year.

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Doh – ritos

October 22, 2013

A new Gallup poll says 58% of Americans now support legalizing marijuana, the highest percentage ever. And no doubt that doesn’t count another 5-10% who responded, “uh, sure, maybe, I don’t know, what was that question again, man?

–

n an effort to combat drug-trafficking, Uruguay will start selling legal marijuana for $1 a gram. In related news, expect travel agents soon to report a huge surge in vacation requests for Montevideo.

–

Why punctuation and careful typing matters, sports version. A fan purchased a World Series ticket on Stubhub for $3.00 (plus a $3 service fee). After the seller apparently left out a comma and/or a couple zeros.

–

Temperatures in Boston are supposed to dip down to near freezing Wednesday night for the opening of the World Series. Guess that’s why they call it the “Winter Classic.”

–

The NFL continues their Europe marketing plan with SF-Jacksonsville in London this weekend. And the Brits are thinking “Okay, thanks for sending the 49ers over, don’t we get a second professional team?”

–

Apparently Kanye West proposed to Kim Kardashian Monday night at A T and T Park. So SF fans, yes, the park has finally seen something scarier than the 2013 Giants’ hitting with runners in scoring position….

(alternate punchline “scarier than Brian Wilson in a Dodgers uniform.”    Other suggestions encouraged.)

–

Tim Lincecum signed a new contract with the SF Giants for two years, $35 million. Guess we know a reason why they were willing to take Kanye West’s money.

–

John McCain is thinking of running for re-election to the Senate in 2016, when he will be 80. And Hillary Clinton is thrilled- McCain will make her look young and vigorous!

–

–

Why men should not do wedding planning. A British groom was sentenced to a year in jail after he admitted to calling in a bomb hoax for St. George’s Hall in Liverpool. He was trying to cover up the fact he had forgotten to book the hall for his own wedding…..

–

Apparently the NY Jets knew the Patriots might try the illegal pushing play during field goals, and alerted the refs to watch for it. And the Sunday before, the Patriots had allegedly tried it against New Orleans, whose defensive coordinator is… Rob Ryan. Oh brother.

–

Regarding the Obamacare website and the idea that it would be up and running without bugs on schedule: these folks may know how to reform healthcare, but they sure don’t know software engineers.

–

Despite polls showing the voters overwhelmingly blaming the GOP for the government shutdown, Ted Cruz said he’ll try to do it again in January. At this rate the Texas senator stands to get a lot of donations – from Democrats.

–

Just proving that when it comes to crazy, your state may matter more than your political party. Democratic congressman Alan Grayson, who is white, sent a fundraising email which equated the Tea Party to the Ku Klux Klan, and had a burning cross for the letter “T.” Yes, he’s from Florida.

–

Truth from Jim Barach:  A poll says that nearly half of all Americans say that everyone in Congress should be replaced. All that needs to happen is for those people to tell that to the quarter of Americans who actually vote in congressional elections.

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 5 Comments

Rock bottom.

October 21, 2013

The Boy Scouts have removed the 2 men who toppled the ancient rock formation in Utah from their posts as scout leaders. No doubt giving thousands of idiots a good lesson – if you’re going to do something that stupid, don’t put it on YouTube.

–

The Houston Texans released rookies Sam Montgomery, Cierre Wood and Willie Jefferson, allegedly for smoking marijuana. Wonder if the three could be picked up by the Seahawks or Broncos?.

–

And go figure, smoke pot in the NFL and you get released?  Take steroids and you get suspended a few games but make it back for the playoffs.

–

It was pretty clear after four days that people in the SF Bay Area missed #BART a lot more than they missed the federal government.

–

The BART strike is over. Now let’s see if both sides can recover from the plague millions of Californians have wished upon their houses.

–

So how did the Minnesota Vikings and NY Giants coaches motivate their teams for MNF?    Winner might vault to the top of the BCS standings?

–

Jim Leyland is stepping down as the Detroit Tigers’ manager. Wonder if those late-inning relief ALCS pitching meltdowns were the tipping point. If so, guess the Tigers’ won’t be interviewing Dusty Baker.

–

Stanford graduate Andrew Luck, after the Colts win over the Broncos yesterday. “We didn’t let the outside sphere of influence creep into the locker room.” Can’t imagine how Luck gets that nerdy reputation.

–

The ghost of Russ Hodges: “The Giants win a game, the Giants win a game”

–

So when Marissa Mayer changed the work at home policy at Yahoo, it was pretty clear she didn’t have childcare issues. Now with the latest update, pretty clear she doesn’t use Yahoo mail either.

–

Stories out of Texas indicate that Senator Ted Cruz is still popular in the state after leading the U.S. into a shutdown. So where is Rick Perry and his talk of secession when we really need him?

–

Gov. Chris Christie is withdrawing his appeal of the recent ruling in favor of gay marriage in New Jersey. Christie says he has a “constitutional obligation to enforce the law.” That and apparently he can read the national poll numbers.

–

–

Oregon’s defensive coordinator apologized for calling Washington State coach Mike Leach “low class” for leaving in his starters and throwing for two late TDs in the Ducks 62-38 win, saying “There’s no excuse, but sometimes right after the game the adrenaline is still flowing and I made a huge, human error in judgment. I wish I could take it back, and I promise it won’t happen again.” Possible translation “I was reminded we might want to run up the score ourselves later this season to impress BCS voters..”.

–

Semi-serious stuff below . You have been warned…

–

Today’s 12 year-old school shooter apparently got a handgun from his parents. Just wondering, if we prosecuted parents for the crimes of their minor children using their guns, and EVERY time a child accidentally shoots themselves or someone else, think folks might try a little higher to keep their weapons in a safe place?

–

Lawyers for James Holmes, the man accused of killing 12 and wounding 70 in the Aurora, CO theater, are arguing that after the shooting police coerced and misled him into talking to them about bombs found in his apartment, and said his statements shouldn’t be used against him. Right. So maybe a dozen or more lives were saved but the cops were out of line. Yet another example of why attorneys are so beloved in the US.

–

What happened to Adrian Peterson’s two year old son is a tragedy. But anyone but me having a bit of a hard time with the all the sympathy for the Vikings star when he had only found out the kid existed a couple months ago, and never met his son until the toddler was dying in the hospital?

 

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 2 Comments

Falling leaves, falling rankings.

October 20, 2013

Five ranked SEC teams lost yesterday. No punchline. I just like writing that.

–

 

The Washington Redskins actually won. I blame Obama.

–

Ted Cruz is now blaming Senate Republicans for the “lousy deal” to reopen the government. Other Senate Republicans are blaming voters in Texas.

–

Perhaps Shakespeare anticipated the BCS? As almost two months before bowls are actually decided, the first BCS standings are out – “full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

–

An alligator wandered right outside a Walmart in Apopka, Florida last night, but returned to its nearby lake without incident. But the 6-foot creature now holds the title of the scariest thing seen at that Walmart, well not wearing curlers and short shorts….

–

Oregon beat WSU 62 to 38, but defensive coordinator Nick Aliotti was furious at Washington State coach Mike Leach, whose team racked up 559 yards. “That’s total bullshit that he threw the ball at the end of the game like he did I think it’s low class and it’s bullshit to throw the ball when the game is completely over against our kids that are basically our scout team.” How dare they indeed… why the Cougars even managed to cover the spread….

–

Stanford fans just watched a #Colts drive where #AndrewLuck showed how he WOULD have won the Fiesta Bowl. #Notbitter

–

Even for those of us whose team’s are not in the World Series, one thing to smile about – after this year Tim McCarver is retiring!

—

Maria Belen Chapur, Mark Sanford’s reason for “hiking the Appalachian trail” and now his fiancee, complained to a reporter that “Everybody has a fantasy that governors or lawmakers make a lot of money. ‘I’m going to take away that fantasy because a governor in the United States makes $108,000 per year … it’s not even enough to pay for private school for his children.” Oh the horror. (Btw, as a Congressman, Sanford now makes $174,000 a year. per capita income in South Carolina, $33,000.)

–

New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick isn’t happy with the controversial rule interpretation that led to the NY Jets’ game winning field goal today. And longtime Oakland Raiders fans are just giggling.

–

Wonder what kind of odds you could have gotten in Vegas before 2013 season that the last undefeated team in the NFL would be the #KCchiefs?

–

If only strength of schedule helped for playoff seeding. #AndrewLuck and #Colts have beaten 49ers, Seahawks and Broncos.

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 7 Comments

Poll dancing.

October 19, 2013

Five of the 10 ten NCAA football teams have lost today. “Wow,” said SEC players. “That’s more than half.”

–

Clemson, Texas A & M, South Carolina and Georgia all lost today.   Guess you can’t really build up strength on a steady diet of cupcakes. 

–

Great touchdown catch for Stanford. Guess you know you’re gettting old when you can remember a time when the reaction wasn’t “Well that will make Top Ten” on “Sportscenter.”

–

Who knew? University of Central Florida might be a better football team than the University of Florida.

–

Kentucky coach John Calipari last night “We don’t just play college basketball, we are college basketball. As you know, we are everyone’s Super Bowl.” It’s that kind of humility and grace that makes the Wildcats so beloved around the sport…..

–

Former Houston Oilers and New Orleans Saints coach Bum Phillips has passed away at the age of 90. Will Saints fans who attend his funeral wear paper bags over their heads?

–

Former NBA superstar Bill Russell, 79, was arrested this week at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport after he apparently forgot about a loaded .38 caliber pistol in his carry-on luggage. If you’re too old to remember you have a gun, perhaps you’re too old to have a gun.

–

Jim Leyland has managed this ALCS like a man who is pushing for MLB to have a mandatory managerial retirement age.

–

Was Max #Scherzer really done in both #ALCS games?   Maybe. Without him, Tigers were really done. Definitely.

–

So when the Boston Red Sox vote playoff shares will they vote one to the LA Dodgers for taking $250 million worth of bad contracts off their payroll?

–

Cal is now 1-6 this year after a big loss to Oregon State. The real question for the 2013 Golden Bears – how did they win that one game?

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 3 Comments

Cardinals rule

October 18, 2013

FOX has announced that all World Series games this year will take place at 8:07pm EST, except for Sunday night’s game which will start at 815p. Way to pull in children as lifelong fans…. kids on the East Coast will be lucky to make it up for 3 innings.

–

SF Giants fans watching tonight’s NLCS game had to be shaking their heads – who knew you were allowed to score runs on Clayton Kershaw?

Alas in the NLCS for Dodgers fans against the #stlcards, Clayton #Kershaw turned out to be no Barry Zito.

–

At about the 5th inning it became obvious that not even Mike Matheny giving Wacha the game ball will save the Dodgers. #beatLA

–

From Giants Hot Corner:  “Tonight was the first rainy, 9-0 win to clinch a NL pennant since… the Giants beat the Cardinals last year”

–

(Congrats to St. Louis, actually. But bet they won’t have anywhere near as cool a souvenir as the SF Giants rain globe.)

–

In college football, UCF (University of Central Florida) had a last minute rally to upset previously undefeated Louisville tonight, 38-35. Wonder if the Golden Knights got a congratulatory phone call from the president of the SEC?

–

Enterprise Rent-A-Car announced they will start renting Harley-Davidson motorcycles on the Las Vegas Strip. Great, let’s mix testosterone, motorbikes and Vegas…. With possibly alcohol.   What could possibly go wrong?

–

A federal air marshal was arrested yesterday at Nashville Airport for allegedly using his cellphone to take upskirt pictures of female passengers boarding a plane. If the guy wanted to see under women’s clothes, why didn’t he just get a job running TSA’s body scanners?

–

I must say that watching Prince Fielder play first is really making me miss watching that svelte young man Pablo Sandoval. #ALCS

–

From TC   “Phoenix Cardinals WR Larry Fitzgerald is enrolled in the U of Phoenix and is working on a degree in Communications. Too bad he couldn’t get QB Carson Palmer signed up as well so they could both be on the same page.”

–

Mitch McConnell said there will not be another government shutdown: “I think we have now fully acquainted our new members with what a losing strategy that is.” Ted Cruz said he wouldn’t rule it out and will “continue to do anything to stop the train wreck that is Obamacare.” This is beginning to remind me of some folks who brag about their parenting skills while their little darlings run amok.

–

So between the government being shut down and the government not being shut down is there any real difference in what Congress is not doing?

–

–

Russian airline Transaero will get its first Airbus A380 in 2015, and while they plan 12 First and 24 Business Class seats, the carrier plans to put 612 seats in economy class. Don’t tell United Airlines.

–

FOX has announced that all World Series games this year will take place at 8:07pm EST, except for Sunday night’s game which will start at 815p. Way to pull in children as lifelong fans…. kids on the East Coast will be lucky to make it up for 3 innings.

–

A woman who was working as a drug informant asked two POLICE OFFICERS she was riding with to help find a hitman to kill her husband. She was arrested when she met the “hitman”, who was an undercover officer, and gave him a shotgun. You guessed it, Florida. (Though Arizona would have been a good 2nd choice.)

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Thank you note?

October 17, 2013

Now that the shutdown is over, wonder if President Obama will send a thank you note to John Boehner and Ted Cruz for reminding him where he put his cojones.

 

 

The government reopened today, and Michele Bachmann called it “a very sad day.”  Brave words from a woman who never had to give up a day of her paycheck.

 

–

Sarah Palin, not fazed by Steve Lonegan’s loss to Cory Booker, is suggesting the Tea Party should focus on 2014 Senate primary challenges to GOP incumbents in Kentucky, South Carolina, Tennessee and Mississippi. Great news…for Democrats.

–

A British company has come out with a line of “Live Strong” style colored silicon bracelets called “My Single Band.” The bracelets indicate that the wearer is unattached and looking for a relationship. Wonder how many married men will buy them.

–

Flori-duh strikes again. This would be funnier if it weren’t scary. Two murderers serving life sentences in a Florida prison were set accidentally set free earlier this month because of forged court documents. The Florida Dept of Law Enforcement just learned of this and a sheriff’s office spokesman said “”These two individuals are out. They shouldn’t be, and we want to get them back in custody.” Ya think?

–

Headline about Mitt and Ann Romney’s California vacation home “Romney to tear down house.” Wonder how many Americans saw that and thought “Could he do the same for the senate?”

 

Roseanne Roseannadanna was right…. Just when folks in Washington D.C. decided to act like adults…. BART workers have announced they plan to strike Friday.

–

Sometimes I think if President Obama said the sky is blue, some conservatives would argue it. But this line from his remarks today might set a record for bipartisan agreement “The American people are completely fed up with Washington.”

–

A Miami high school teacher was fired after she rented a penthouse apartment for a post-prom party that included alcohol and condoms. And across America men are thinking “Where were teachers like that when I was in high school.”

–

Thursday was #throwbackthursday Could we throwback #TedCruz to Canada?

 

–

The Oregon Ducks will wear pink helmets this weekend for their game against Washington State in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month. Good idea, should add a spark to their usually otherwise nondescript uniforms….

–

And for those who think the Ducks’ uniforms aren’t ugly enough, or for that matter the Red Sox playoff beards, I leave you with. the Dodgers’  Andre Eithier.

–

Image

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Progress and Congress.

October 16, 2013

Cory Booker won the U.S Senate seat in New Jersey tonight. Against a Republican who called him a “Hollywood stand-in” for President Obama. Alas for Steve Lonegan NJ voters apparently viewed him as a stand-in for Ted Cruz.

–

A new study found that Oreos are as addictive as cocaine. The scary thing… what does that mean for treats that are made from real chocolate?

–

A flight from San Jose to Honolulu made an emergency stop in Oakland after a bird was sucked into an engine. Alaska Airlines reported no injuries. The bird, however, would disagree.

–

Brian Cashman’s former mistress is suing her psychiatrist for leaking medical information to the Yankees GM, which she claims to her arrest and incarceration for five months. Hmm, maybe we’ve found a possible woman who really deserves A-Rod.

–

Obama met briefly today with Miss America Nina Davuluri when she visited the White House with a group from the Children’s Miracle Network Hospital Champions. Presumably the President did so despite an offer to fill in during the shutdown from former President Clinton.

–

Staten Island Congressman Michael Grimm, who is single, is denying the story that he had a 17-minute sexual encounter with a woman in a wine bar bathroom. I don’t know… 17 minutes? Might raise his standing with female voters.

–

Ted Cruz decided not to block a vote on the Senate shutdown-debt ceiling deal. So has he decided he likes “Green Eggs & Ham?”

–

John Boehner may have accomplished the impossible – making Harry Reid and Mitch McConnell look like statesmen.

–

So regarding this Redskins controversy, we used to have the Washington Senators. In light of current events and current competence levels, why don’t we rename the football team the Washington House?

–

“Better to keep silent and be thought a fool” dept: Colts owner Jim Irsay said he was “frustrated” that his team won only one Super Bowl when Peyton Manning was there. Just the motivation Peyton needs for his next opponent… Indianapolis.

–

Peyton Manning in response to Colts’ owner Irsay’s complaint about them only having 1 ring. “I don’t have any answer for you on that, or any comment on any of that.” Two points on that: 1. Archie raised a classy son. 2. Broncos are 6-0, and the Colts 4-2. (No comment is a bit classier than “Suck it, Irsay.”)

–

What a relief for Fox announcers. With Pedroia’s single in 1st tonight, they didn’t need to spend most of #ALCS game 4 jinxing another #Tigers no-hitter.

–

If any men needed more explanation as to why females still adore Robert Redford, there’s was today’s CNN interview: Where the actor said that women and young people are the answer in Washington “Give them the reins. I think they can do better than we have.”

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Comments: 2 Comments

Playoffs and other stress tests.

October 16, 2013

Apparently after a routine stress test, doctors found that George W. Bush had a 95-percent blockage in one of his coronary arteries, which doctors opened with a stent. “Who needs a heart anyway?” responded Dick Cheney.

 

Fans who don’t regularly watch baseball and have turned in for the playoffs had to be looking at tonight’s Cardinals-Dodgers game and thinking “Wait, you’re allowed to score before you’ve played 5 or 6 innings?”

 

No one will know if Yasiel Puig woke up the St. Louis Cardinals. Besides, the idea that such a thing can happen during the postseason is a myth. Just ask the SF Giants who beat the same Cardinals during Jeffrey Leonard’s “One Flap Down” playoff series…. Oops, never mind.

(of course as my friend Michael says  “Cards are a lock. When’s the last time they blew a 3-1 series lead?)

 

–

Regarding Puig, I do seriously get the youthful exuberance.   But while baseball has ceded many things about being America’s pastime to football, I do hope they never try to match the NFL with all the dances and celebrations that have gone from following a game-winning touchdown, to the most trivial of tackles or catches.  As the much-ascribed line goes “act like you’ve been there before.”

 

–

Detroit twice had runners on third with less than two out, and failed to score today. The 2013 Tigers picked a bad day to turn into the 2013 SF Giants.

 

 

Class act: Dennis Eckersley on the 25th anniversary of the Kirk Gibson HR “It was a great moment for the game, just not a great moment for me. There’s so many great things that have happened to me since that time, if that’s the only thing I have to live with for the rest of my life, I’m cool with it.”

–

From Bill Littlejohn:  On the 25th anniversary of Kirk Gibson’s iconic World Series HR against the Athletics,  the Dodgers wanted him to throw out the first pitch at Tuesday’s playoff game-.  The D-Backs manager declined, but said that he would throw a couple of Dodgers into a swimming pool

–

Lights back on in Comerica Park after a 17 minute power outage. Waiting for the Baltimore Ravens to blame this on Roger Goodell.

 

The Senate is trying to resolve the shutdown and debt ceiling crisis created by the House. And if and when this is done, will Senate leaders Reid and McConnell also give House members a timeout?

–

Two days to default. And the Senate passed a “clean” funding bill two weeks ago. But somehow a House that can vote to overturn Obamacare 40 times can’t manage to vote on it once?

(Can’t we borrow the “Vote of No Confidence” rule from Britain just once?  And use it next week?)-

—

People complain Obamacare is confusing? As opposed to the current mess? Anthem says they pay 70% for non-participating providers, but actually pay closer to 20%, because they decided a California ob-gyn doctor should only charge $90 for a new patient comprehensive exam. Their response to a complaint: “The amount is determined according to the non-participating provider section in your Evidence Disclosure Form from March 1, 2013, on page 131….” #weneedsinglepayer

 

(regarding that page 131… wonder how many pages are in the form?)

 

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

Comments: Be the first to comment

Final, Final Last Chances…

October 15, 2013

Really? Email Monday from a vendor “Final Day to Shop Our Columbus Day Sale.” But presumably tomorrow is the “First day to shop the Halloween Sale”.

 

So while we’re on the football team name game… In these PC times is it only due to the fact that New Orleans’ team now is pretty good, that we haven’t heard a protest from the Catholic Church?

–

Idea for President Obama to get bipartisan agreement during a tough time in Washington, D.C.: Appointing Dan Snyder to some symbolic but meaningless position which would still require Snyder to sell the Redskins.

–

In Berkeley, Seattle, and other U.S. cites, Columbus Day is Indigenous Peoples’ Day. But no matter how P.C. this country gets, however, it will probably never spread national-wide. Especially since most Americans can’t spell “Indigenous.”

–

Harry Reid said Monday a deal was near to end the shutdown. Maybe someone told Ted Cruz to stay home because no one would be negotiating on Columbus Day?

 

Got to love announcers saying that an 0 2 hole in ALCS or NLCS would mean series was basically over. Guess it’s been so long in MLB  since a team climbed out of a two-game hole…

 

–

A backup dancer who dressed up as a teddy bear for Miley Cyrus’s MTV performance is now saying that being “on that stage, in that costume was one of the most degrading things I felt like I could ever do.” Uh, presumably less degrading than a costume where anyone could actually see her face and recognize her.

–

Arkansas AD director Jeff Long has been named the first chair of the College Football Playoff selection committee. Someone from the SEC, I’m shocked, shocked…..

 

Tried to buy red wine from United flight attendant. “Sorry, we only have white.”. Okay, then,  fine. Pay the man and he hands me a chilled mini-bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon.

–

Scientists have found traces of a chemical similar to methamphetamine in Craze, a pre-workout sports supplement. Wonder if the company claims the product was originally designed by a high school teacher?

 

Greg Schiano, coach of the 0-5 Tampa Bay Bucs “The only thing I can say to the fans is, if they can hang in there, we’re going to be good.” Not sure if he’s right, but Schiano has just been named an honorary Chicago Cub

 

Macy’s will open some stores this Thanksgiving at 8pm. The bad news, this will keep many Americans from spending time with their families. The good news, this will keep many Americans from spending time with their families.

–

A Massachusetts High School senior volleyball player lost her captain’s title and was suspended five games after she drove to pick up a drunk friend at a party where students were drinking. (Despite a police officer’s vouching for her being sober.) Wrong on so many levels, but why do I think this wouldn’t have happened to the captain of the football team?

–

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

Any given Sunday

October 13, 2013

saints saintssaintsIn New Orleans. Where they do love their football team….

saints

Although, up four points, 10 seconds left,  no timeouts for the Patriots….  Why not line up six men on the goal line, five at the five, and dare Brady and company to break through?  Just sayin’

–

At this point finding replacement name for the Washington Redskins will have to be some inanimate object. Because the team is playing in a way that would be an insult to any real or mythical creature.

–

The baseball Gods do not apparently approve of pulling a dominant starting pitcher who has thrown only 108 pitches #Redsox #Tigers

–

Things fell apart for the Tigers so fast Sunday night, Giants fans had to wonder, did Leyland give Scherzer the game ball?

–

–

Though if the Red Sox been shut out again would Bud Selig have declared a moratorium on post-season PED testing?

–

Marc Ragovin “I guess you can say that the Red Sox won game two of the ALCS by the hair of their chinny chin chins.”

‘-

The #Jets look to be joining the #Yankees, #Mets and #Giants in a campaign to give NY sports fans a choice: Hockey or basketball?

–

GM Brian Cashman denied reports he would prefer to have A-Rod suspended than have the Yankees pay him $24 million last year. And he said it with a straight face.

–

A Teapartier today at the so-called “Million Vet March” demanded that President Obama “leave town, put the Quran down, get up off his knees, and figuratively come out with his hands up.” Charming. Wonder why the same guy isn’t demanding that Ted Cruz go back to Canada.

–

Rand Paul said that President Obama should not be using scare tactics about raising the federal debt ceiling. Right, add “the U.S. paying bills on time” to the list of commie pinko liberal concepts.

–

–

I think I’m beginning to understand the narrative: When President Obama compromises with the GOP, he’s a spineless wimp.  When he stands his ground, he’s an arrogant wanna-be dictator.

–

Only unhappy football fans in Denver Sunday night. Anyone who bet the 28 point spread. #Jagssuckbutnotthatmuch

–

SF Giants fans are happy the team didn’t make the rumored trade of Javier Lopez to Detroit. Tigers fans tonight, not so much.

Categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

Comments: 2 Comments

First love, first hate.

October 12, 2013

An actual semi-serious post to start:  Well, as serious as sports gets  🙂

 

First love, first hate. They stick with you. Since 1986 – “You gotta like these kids” – I have been a die-hard SF Giants fan. But my first team growing up as a kid was the Detroit Tigers, my first favorite player, Mickey Lolich. (Had to empathize with the less than glamorous lefty.) Got lucky with a 1968 World Series win. But then 1971, and Lolich’s best year with 25 wins still left him a runner-up to Vida Blue for the Cy Young.   And in 1972, the Oakland A’s knocked the Detroit Tigers out in five games. The first ALCS playoff. Broke my heart. I was 13.

 

And I haven’t forgiven the A’s since. To the point, that, yes, I admit it, I wasn’t completely unhappy when Kirk Gibson hit that home run off Eck. 1989 didn’t help, but I have “forgiven” other teams who beat the Giants. The Tigers were my first love, the A’s, my first hate. And yes, I rooted for the Giants last year. But felt just a bit guilty.   So, Thursday night made me happy. And even though I was born in Boston, game one of the ALCS made me happy.   And JV and company,  hope you bring a trophy with those little flags back to a city that could really use it.

–

–

Now back to less serious stuff, like football:

Clemson  suspended two players for “poor behavior.” And NY Giants fans said “You can do that?”

–

Lane Kiffin said today his firing was “very difficult.”. And USC fans are thinking “not as difficult as watching the teams you coached.”

–

Texas wins big over Oklahoma in the “Save Mack Brown’s Job Bowl.”

–

From my friend Karen T.   “Dear Jackass ESPN Announcer Calling the Michigan v Penn State Game: Jerry Sandusky was not involved in a “sex scandal”. Jerry Sandusky is a pedophile and a serial child molester.  Yes, there IS a difference and yes, it DOES matter.

–

Stanford lost 27-21 today.    And a near comeback fell short when a 3rd and 2 at the 6 with a minute left resulted into calls for two incomplete passes.   Is it a rule that a #Stanford football coach must have a brain cramp once a season?   

–

In the misery loves company department, Stanford fans might have some sympathy for Michigan. Up a touchdown with 30 seconds left, the Wolverines lost 43-40 in 4 OTS. After missing 3 of 4 FGs that could have won the game in the first 3 OTS.

–

In a recent poll, 22% of Americans admitted to not knowing which party their current member of Congress belongs to. Of course, the harder question might have been “Name your member of Congress.”

(And has my friend David mentioned, how many think they know and are wrong?)

–

Okay, if we HAVE to pay Congress during the shutdown, can we at least fine them for each day it goes on…. say an amount exactly equal to that day’s pay?

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

Comments: 2 Comments

« Older Entries