Posted tagged ‘Janice Hough’

Actually keeping score?

August 29, 2019

Ok. I get that some people think I’m a little obsessed to be stressed about Democratic Presidential primaries this early. And yet there are folks who are seriously stressed about the scores of week 4 pre-season NFL football.

With back-to-back home runs today, Minnesota Twins broke the major league record season for most home runs on the road. which was 138. And there’s a full month left in the season.
But sure, Barry Bonds is the one whose home run total should have an asterisk…

At least for remainder of season can 2019 SF Giants officially retire the term “home field advantage?

Two weeks after Chris Davis had a dugout confrontation with manager Brandon Hyde, Orioles reliever Richard Bleier and 3rd-base coach Jose David Flores also ended up in a public shouting match in the dugout.
Baltimore fans just wish the team would show that much energy on the field.

Alex Trebek is back at work taping the new season of “Jeopardy!,” five months after being diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer.

“What is really good news?”

 

Travel rant.  Austrian Airlines and Lufthansa are offering a scheduled LEGAL connection between a Vienna to Frankfurt flight and a Frankfurt to San Francisco flight that is 45 minutes!?!
So will transfer assistance be provided by flying pig?

The latest wannabe mass shooter at High Point University told police he was trying to get into a fraternity and that “if his roommate got into a fraternity and he didn’t, he had a plan to kill his roommate and himself.”
But no, we don’t have an epidemic of white male privilege.

 

Interesting timing. Trump wants G7 at Mar-a-Lago and mean bitch Karma along with Mother Nature remind him. “Dude, it’s hurricane season.”

 

Well, since most bugs can’t swim Hurricane Dorian might take care of the Doral bed bug problem.

Trump today canceled his trip to Poland.   Guess it’s just as well Trump had already canceled Danish part of European trip. Does anyone think Mother Pence would have let Mike have dinner with the very attractive Danish Prime Minister?

 

 

Does anyone think Trump would have canceled his trip if he were scheduled to go to Buckingham Palace? Or to one of his rallies?  Or to one of his golf resorts?

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Slower than a speeding bullet

August 27, 2019

Submarine pitcher Tyler Rogers made his major league debut at Oracle Park Tuesday night, pitching a 1-2-3 inning with most pitches in the 70s (MPH)   So who needs a 95 MPH fastball.

submarine

Rob Gronkowski “Football was bringing me down.”
So does this make him an honorary Redskins fan?

Fox Sports reporting that an unnamed NFL team reached out to Carli Lloyd with an offer to play in a preseason game this week.
Not sure if Carli will play in a real game, but guessing she won’t double-doink the ball off the crossbars

Love it. Young 20-somethings on train who work for some big company near Palo Alto are complaining about their employer and whining that bosses act like their parents. Uh…

Your reminder that Senator Tom Cotton, who is pushing so hard to buy Greenland, voted AGAINST hurricane relief for Puerto Rico.

 

William Barr is planning a $30,000 private holiday party at the Trump hotel in DC.  Now, I know many Americans may not understand the details of the emoluments clause. But you would think the US attorney would.

New Orleans is the most liberal part of Louisiana. So you just KNOW if Katrina happened on Trump’s watch he’d have complained about sending them money too.

Trump now whining about Puerto Rico and $$$ “Wow! Yet another big storm heading to Puerto Rico. Will it ever end?”

Has anyone told him Greenland is an island too?

After Trump’s heartless “will it ever end” tweet about Dorian approaching Puerto Rico, a new model shows center of storm could end up near West Palm Beach.
Is it possible mean bitch karma and Mother Nature are looking together at a map showing Mar-A-Lago?

Trump tweet also refers to his failing Trump Doral National MIAMI resort as “perfectly located (for the next G-7).”
“Perfectly located?” For a summer meeting? Heck, Donald doesn’t even go to his beloved Mar-A-Lago in summer.

And finally look, been in the travel industry for decades. If a hotel has a major PR disaster the way to get past it is apologize profusely, offer to make it up to guests affected, and say what you are doing or have done to fix the problem. Whether it’s a racist staff member, something like Legionnaire’s disease, or bedbugs,
What you do NOT do is deny the problem ever happened and accuse your accusers. #CantFixStupid
#TrumpBedBugs

Deflated balls?

August 26, 2019

A Harvard study found that former American football players who suffered concussions are more likely to develop low testosterone levels and erectile dysfunction in later life.  Forget CTE, this might be what finally kills pro football.

After Houston talk show host Rick Kamla yesterday called Andrew Luck, who went to high school in the area, a “quitter” and a “joke” in a tweet, today he apologized and said he used a “terrible choice of words.”
Translation, Luck retired, I don’t want to be fired.

Anyone but me not only a sports fan but also REALLY don’t care about Antonio Brown and his helmet?

Chiefs sign Matt Moore, who retired after 2017 season, as a backup QB after Chad Henne broke his ankle.
Now, I’ve never been a huge Kaepernick fan, especially since he says it’s not worth voting, but who’s going to get signed next before him? Brett Favre, Tim Tebow?

This Sunday there were three malls, including the Great Mall in Milpitas, California, with shooting scares.  But aside from how terrifying these episodes are, how long until millions of Americans just decide they feel safer only doing online shopping? As if retail isn’t hurting enough.

Former Maricopa county Sheriff Joe Arpaio was convicted for criminal contempt of court over a racial profiling case and pardoned by Trump in 2017. How he’s running again for Sheriff in 2020.
Even Mississippi and Florida are going “How nuts does he think Arizona voters are?”

Trump this morning claimed Melania has “gotten to know” North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. So another useless lie? Or is he confusing Melania and Ivanka. #WishfulThinking

Trump today, claiming he’s an “environmentalist. “I want clean air. I want clean water. “I want a wealthy country. I want a spectacular country, with jobs, with pensions…and that’s what we’re getting.”
Yeah, when I was about five I wanted a flying pony.

Can anyone imagine how apoplectic GOP would have been if Obama even proposed having G7 in Hawaii because it was close to where he grew up? Let alone at a place he owned.

Another thought about 2020 G7. They are held generally in the summer. Having graduated from Lake Brantley High school near Orlando, outdoors in early June, I can attest that even at 7a no human being wants to be in Florida that time of year

So Trump feels the need to deny that he asked about nuking hurricanes but not that he says windmills cause cancer?

Without a little bit of Luck

August 25, 2019

Colts fans must feel as shocked and betrayed as if someone stole their team in the middle of the night.

.

Wonder how many fans in Indianapolis who booed Andrew Luck as a coward for retiring would cheer if the Colts signed Colin Kaepernick in his place.

 

But yes, your reminder, Colin Kaepernick is still available.

Pablo Sandoval to have Tommy John surgery. Wonder if he’ll recover in time to pitch next season.

Patriots TE Lance Kendricks now joins Benjamin Watson on the suspended list, and safety Patrick Chung has been arrested on a cocaine charge. Gosh, whoever thought Bill Belichick would have so many players doing something illegal?

Tennessee Volunteers sophomore CB Bryce Thompson arrested for misdemeanor domestic assault after he allegedly threatened to “slap the s— out of” a woman and to “shoot up the school.”
Since Thompson was a Freshman All-American and led the team in interceptions last year, how long until someone decides he’s a nice kid who deserves a second chance?

Meanwhile, NCAA has put Mississippi State football on probation for academic cheating. Well, good to know they’ve punished the only problem school in the SEC.

With about 5 weeks left in MLB season, Baltimore GM Mike Elias has fired 11 people in front office and scouting department. He says it’s “to provide those who lost their jobs a jump at getting back into the market.”
Because don’t all other teams want to snatch up talent from the Orioles?

On Trump tariffs, “This is not the way to proceed. Apart from everything else, those who support the tariffs are at risk of incurring the blame for the downturn in the global economy, irrespective of whether or not that is true.”
This sentence from that noted voice of reason Boris Johnson!!??

Trump at G7  “The question I was asked most today by fellow World Leaders, who think the USA is doing so well and is stronger than ever before, happens to be, “Mr. President, why does the American media hate your Country so much? Why are they rooting for it to fail?””
Uh, would he like to name ONE of those world leaders?

How long until Trump claims the Amazon rainforest fires are the fault of Jeff Bezos?

Joe Walsh says he will primary Donald Trump in 2020.  Let me be very clear, I agree with Joe Walsh on very little, and disagree with him strongly on guns and a woman’s right to choose.
But I believe he is a sane person who loves this country. And cannot say the same about Trump.

Tying knots

August 24, 2019

Olympic gold medal skier Lindsey Vonn and current NHL star P.K. Subban are getting married. Do we call this yet another missed cut for Tiger Woods?

Dwight Howard has signed with Los Angeles Lakers, and ESPN reports they have told him “Disrupt this team — and you’ll be gone.”
Over-under on how long he’ll last?

Team USA just lost to Australia in basketball. Can we blame Trump?

Miami 19, Philadelphia 11. Wait, I know the Raiders and Panthers played in Winnipeg, but I thought Marlins Park was baseball only.

So the real question at G7 France – Who will Trump insult first?

Seth Moulton has dropped out of the Presidential Race. All together now “Who?”

Amazing how same people who insist the most left-wing members of Congress are the “face of the Democratic party,” somehow don’t make the same statement about Steve King being the face of the GOP.

Got to love it, the Stable Genius is tweeting that “Our great American companies are hereby ordered to immediately start looking for an alternative to China…”
And he’s tweeting from a iPhone!

Meanwhile, I am getting regular fundraising emails from Bernie Sanders whose campaign seems to think I want a Bernie baseball card or baseball shirt. Uh, yeah, I’m “Vote Blue No Matter Who 2020” but otherwise….I’d ALMOST rather wear a Dodger shirt. Sorry.

 

Jean Cramer, a Marysville, Michigan city council candidate, said she wants to keep the town “as white as possible,” and added a “husband and wife need to be the same race. Same thing with kids. That’s how it’s been from the beginning of, how can I say, when God created the heaven and the earth. He created Adam and Eve at the same time.”
Uh if that’s literally true then ALL kids are descended from their children and thus products of incest. #WTF?
(and actually, there are no pictures of Adam nor Eve…. who’s to say they were the same race? A creator can go for diversity too.)

 

Finally, Limerick Time. Because, why not?
There once was a President Trump
Who expected the whole world to jump.
For his thoughts that were bad,
and really quite sad.
Which he tweeted while taking a dump.

Outta here

August 21, 2019

Baltimore Orioles just tied record of 258 for most home runs allowed in season, set by 2016 Cincinnati Reds who play at the Little League field known as “Great American Ballpark.” Mariners, Angels, Yankees, and Phillies are all on pace to break the record too.
But no, the ball isn’t juiced.

How juiced is the 2019 MLB baseball? If Duane Kuiper were playing now he’d have hit TWO home runs.

Houston Astros were one of the largest favorites in MLB game ever when Justin Verlander took mound against the Detroit Tigers tonight.

And they lost 2-1.  They also lost in extra innings as huge favorites to the Orioles recently.. And then wonder what the odds were when Verlander started WS Game 1 in 2012 against SF Giants and Barry Zito?

Maybe the Houston should beg Vegas to make them longshots to win the World Series?

Sean Spicer on #DWTS? Because he has so much experience Dancing with the Truth?

I’m so old that I remember when Ted Cruz falsely claimed in his Presidential campaign that he “had a president in the White House who has a messiah complex.”
And now that we have one who actually DOES…..?

If Alec Baldwin on SNL as Trump described himself as “King of Israel,” many Republicans would complain the show had gone too far.
Yet Trump does it for real and GOP just shrugs.

Trump this morning referred to PM of Denmark as “nasty,” to himself as “King of Israel” and also “the chosen one.”
At this point beginning to think that anyone who doesn’t think he’s pathological is themselves pathological.

So where are all those in GOP who lost their collective sh*t over Obama’s executive orders now that Trump says he’s “very seriously” looking at trying to change the Constitution by executive order to eliminate birthright citizenship?
Asking for a country.

The man who referred to Mayor of London as a “stone cold loser,” Justin Trudeau as “dishonest and weak, and to Africa as having “shithole countries” now responds to Danish PM’s saying his proposal to buy Greenland is “absurd” by calling her “nasty.”
Are we great yet?

 

So if Governor Gavin Newsom calls Trump “absurd” does that mean that Donald will call off all future trips to California? Oh please oh please…

Ch-ch-ch-choices…..

April 26, 2018

Has any team after day 1 of NFL Draft ever said “Well, guy we picked was our 4th or 5th choice, but the SOBs above us nabbed all the guys we really wanted”?

NFL Draft.  When many young men will have their dreams come true. Including those who breathed a sigh of relief “Well, at least I didn’t get drafted by the Cleveland Browns.”

NY Jets fans seem very happy with Sam Darnold And why not, because USC QBs have done so well lately in the NFL….. #sarcasm

San Jose Sharks could have found a better way to distract from #NFLdraft than to lose by a 7-0 football score.

NBA admits last night they missed goaltending on LeBron James at end of Cavs-Pacers game 5. Silly league. Don’t they know superstars NEVER goaltend? Or travel for that matter.

Despite joking about bomb at LAX, Packers WR Trevor Davis will not face charges after meeting with LA City Attorney. Did Davis claim he didn’t know any better since he’s a Cal grad? @StanfordFootball

Well so much for Donald Trump’s plan to nominate as Secretary of VA, Dr. Cliff Huxtable.

So will O.J. Simpson offer to help Bill Cosby find the real rapist.

So House Speaker Ryan fired House chaplain for criticizing tax cuts? I’m so old that I remember when Paul Ryan was a “compassionate conservative.”

So when’s the duet coming out with Kanye West and Shania Twain?

When Trump visits England in July he may skip London to avoid unpleasant protests. Right, the man who believes he would rush a shooter is afraid of unarmed Brits with placards. #CadetBoneSpurs

Rand Paul saying he opposes Gina Haspel’s nomination to lead the CIA over her use of torture. Time to open up the pool on when Paul will say he’s decided to support her. #invertebrate

Trump said maybe he didn’t get Melania “so much” for her birthday. “I got her a beautiful card.” Not perhaps the gift she really wanted – divorce papers?

Trump on  Fox and Friends – Cohen was one of his “many attorneys. He represents me like with this crazy Stormy Daniels deal.”
Can’t imagine why White House doesn’t want him to sit down with Mueller.

That moment when POTUS is even too crazy for  Fox and Friends….

Trump tweeted  he “Loved being on @foxandfriends this morning. Great show!”
Maybe not as much as Democrats liked it.

 

Congressman Steve King proposed legislation to keep CNN from paying airports to be on televisions in terminals. Well, not like GOP is about free markets or anything….