Archive for April 2015

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Step in time?

April 10, 2015

Cleveland Cavaliers’ Kendrick Perkins had a 9-step travel that the referees did not call. 9-steps?! “Amateur” sniffed Michael Jordan.

 

 

In Allen, Texas, a rancher was given a $266 citation for doing what he’s been doing for years, riding his horse to Taco Bell. Apparently it’s not allowed to ride on a public street. Now, if he’d just walked downtown carrying a couple shotguns….

 

Spurs beat the Rockets in Houston tonight 104-103. Are we sure that up in the rafters of the Alamodome along with all those banners there aren’t really ancient portraits of Duncan, Ginobili and Parker?

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So regarding this announcement Sunday, wouldn’t it be more of a headline if Hillary Clinton said she WASN’T running for President?

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Kentucky’s Karl-Anthony Towns may be the #1 NBA draft pick and he has said it obviously would be a little special” to play for the Knicks. Makes sense. Towns only spent one year with the Wildcats – he’d enjoy the chance to spend more years with top college-level players.

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Big news at the Masters. Tiger Woods will make the cut! (Oh, yeah, and some guy broke the 36 hole course record. Details, details….)

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Sad to hear of the passing of Richard Dysart, Leland McKenzie in LA Law. Hard as it might be to believe, for eight years there were actually lawyers you WANTED to see every week. ‪#‎venusbutterfly‬

 

As the NHL regular season draws to a close, San Jose Sharks fans are asking Toronto Maple Leafs fans “So what do you do now to be disappointed during the playoffs?”

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The Grateful Dead sent a letter to their fans announcing two new concerts in June at Levi’s Stadium in Santa Clara on June 27 and 28. “Since we made the decision to go back to Chicago to say our final goodbye, it has become clear to us that we first need to return to our beginnings, where we first said hello — to each other and to all of you.”

Yep, talk about having million$ of rea$on$ to make thing$ clearer.

 

From Marc Ragovin  “Troy Polamalu has retired. His final message to Steeler Nation: “I’m outta hair.”

 

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So on the day that it is first announced MLB is sending out “pace of game” warning to players, at the time of writing this post, the Red Sox and Yankees are heading towards 7 hours in an extra-inning game. Karma and her sister Irony are mean bitches.

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Burning not so bright?

April 9, 2015

Hard to be believe there will come a time when Tiger Woods retires, and ESPN will have to report who’s actually leading a golf tournament as opposed to how Tiger is doing on the course.

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The seven top Kentucky scorers are all leaving early for the NBA draft. But the WIldcats are still favored to win the NCAA championship in 2016. Seinfeld used to talk about rooting for laundry, heck, this is rooting for a recruiting class.

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President Obama visited the Bob Marley museum in Jamaica and commented that he “had all his albums.” Some in the GOP immediately responded “That’s it, proof that Obama’s a ‘stoner.'” Some in the younger generation responded “what’s an album?”

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We’re almost to the NBA playoffs, which don’t end up with a catchy name like “World Series” or “Super Bowl.” Guess there’s just not enough of a ring to “April-May-June Madness”

 

The Minnesota Twins have scored 1 run in their first 36 innings. Are they trying to become the official MLB team of Major League Soccer?

 

#‎TroyPolamalu‬ has retired. Many ‪#‎Steelers‬ fans will fly their hair at half mast.

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Well this should make for a fun locker room…. Last year Seahawks DE Michael Bennett called Jimmy Graham “one of the softest players in the NFL.” Now after Graham was traded from New Orleans to Seattle, Bennett said today in a radio interview “I still feel the same way, just because he’s on my team I don’t stop feeling that way.”

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An Icelandair plane enroute to Denver was hit by lightning. It landed 7 1/2 half hours later despite a hole in its nose. The aircraft will now be christened “Keith Richards.”

 

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Atlanta Hawks forward Thabo Sefolosha apparently fractured his tibia while interfering with police after the 4am stabbing of Indiana Pacers forward Chris Copeland outside “1 Oak.” Hmm, will the Knicks strategy to win next year involve giving opposing players nightclub passes?

 

 

From Marc Ragovin   “Seen in New York: “Welcome to Madison Square. Where the Rangers and Knicks have combined for one President’s Trophy””

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The Padres’ Ian Kennedy out with an injury while pitching in the third. Shocking, the 2015 SF Giants are capable of breaking a player who isn’t on their own team?

 

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Hard for SF Giants fans to watch Casey McGehee make 2 errors tonight, AND hit into a double play with runners at 1st and 3rd in the 9th. Although Mcgehee is hitting .294. And Pablo Sandoval is hitting .167. ‪#‎theoryofrelativity‬

 

From T.C.  – the groaner of the week.  “Cubs fans had to pee into cups as the restrooms at Wrigley Field were out of order on Opening Day. For those that drank more than a couple of beer, they needed to use a relief pitcher.”

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Chris Christie apparently is going to ratchet up his campaigning next week after falling in most polls. One of his NH supporters, Bill Greiner told CNN “John McCain was left for dead in 2007 and 2008, and look what happened. Gov. Christie is very similar to McCain.”
Does this mean the NJ Gov. will get the nomination and then pick a complete whack job for a running mate?

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On a serious note, just wondering, if they can put a camera and computer in a little phone, or a watch, why can’t they put a camera in a gun? Like a police gun. Like all police guns.

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Missed it by how much?

April 8, 2015

The NCAA’s supervisor of officials said none of them saw the CBS video feed on the controversial out-of-bounds call at the end of the national championship game. But today Dan Gavitt, the NCAA’s VP told ESPN that officials DID see it. Ah, well this ought to reassure all the Duke conspiracy theorists….

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The Boston Celtics are making a late push for the #8 seed in the Eastern Conference. Isn’t that the NBA equivalent of making it to the March Madness play-in game?

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The mayor of Hillsboro, Mo, population 2,800, died March 9, but was re-elected yesterday. Well, maybe the voters figured, it’s been a month, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

 

 

New York Knicks owner James Dolan just said in an interview “You got to believe, baby! I believe, I believe!” And even Cubs fans are saying “Are you bleeping nuts?”

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Someone is selling a New Orleans Saints Super Bowl ring on Craigslist. Maybe one of the Jets should buy it, might be their best chance at getting a ring.

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Mitt Romney who had Duke over Wisconsin in the NCAA championship, tweeted “Should have put $10,000 on my bracket. Congrats, Coach K and @DukeU,” Prompting an immediate call for Romney to reconsider entering the 2016 race, from Pete Rose.

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I understand the American way of justice, and it’s mostly a good thing. Still seems somehow odd to spend millions of dollars saving a critically injured man’s life, and then millions of dollars to try him, and then probably now millions of dollars over appeals to a death penalty conviction. ‪#‎BostonMarathonExplosion‬

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A new book about the White House says that during a fight after the Monica Lewinsky affair came to light, Hillary Clinton called Bill a “g*ddamn b*stard” and that she had him sleep on a couch for a few months. Some say the revelations could hurt Hillary’s candidacy. Thinking it might make a lot of women like her better.

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Aqib Talib, a CB for the Denver Broncos, who had charges dropped after an alleged gun incident in 2011, is apparently being investigated again for allegedly firing a gun into the air during a fight at a Dallas nightclub. So clearly the Aaron Hernandez trial is serving as a cautionary lesson to other NFL players. ‪#‎facepalm‬ ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

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Pitcher Chris Heston missed his Opening Day start for the Sacramento River Cats. Bummer.  ‪#‎SFGiants‬

(and the way his start went, he may never have that start.)

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The media is reporting that last year Barry Manilow married his manager and apparently  long time partner. Garry Kief.  I am shocked, said absolutely positively nobody.

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A scary thought about that South Carolina case. If the person with the cellphone video saw what really happened, what about that officer’s partner?

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As Rand Paul is getting unfavorable coverage for lecturing journalists, especially female journalists, on how to do their jobs, #”‪#‎Randsplaining‬ is trending on Twitter. Well, it’s a good thing for Paul that if he stays in the Presidential race he won’t have to be dealing with this sort of thing in future. ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬ ‪#‎cantfixarrogant‬ either.

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Do you see what I see?

April 7, 2015

Oops. The NCAA’s supervisor of officials admitted today that the officials who gave possession to Duke after a late out-of-bounds play, didn’t have all the angles that CBS had. Although the TV replay showed the Blue Devils’ Winslow touching the ball with his fingertips. But to be fair, with amateur sports it’s not like the NCAA really has the money to do it right.

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If we’re going to have legalized discrimination, can some state become a pioneer in saying businesses do not have to serve stupid people? Because ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

 

Mitt Romney finished in the the top 1% of contestants in the ESPN NCAA tournament challenge, having Duke and Wisconsin and Duke winning it all. President Obama was in the 40th percentile. Of course, had Obama done as well as Romney the GOP would accuse him of having neglected his duties to focus on basketball.

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Kentucky coach John Calipari says he expects “five to seven players” to declare for the NBA draft.  It’s a scary choice for these young men. But since returnees must be academically eligible, they’ll have to figure out how to find the classrooms.

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From Marty Robinson:  “In Monday night’s NCAA championship game, Duke rallied to beat Wisconsin, earning their 5th title in the Coach K era. “Wonderful” said absolutely nobody outside of Durham.”

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Last night’s Miami Marlins opener was delayed 16 minutes by rain in the second inning, because the roof operators couldn’t get the roof closed fast enough. If only their supervisor had been armed.

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As pictures of all of these plastic cups full of something that isn’t beer circulate after Opening Night for the Cubs at Wrigley Field, here’s a tip for other teams: If you are doing a major renovation on your stadium, do the bathrooms first.

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Norwegian Cruise Line has an “enhanced” room service menu on some of their ships. And those menus will include a “convenience charge” of up to $7.95 per order. “Convenience charge?”! And many airlines are thinking, why didn’t we think of that?

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Mercedes Benz is coming out with a pickup truck. The perfect vehicle for all those cowboy politicians who still want to pretend they can relate to the “common man.”

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LeGarrette Blount, suspended 3 times at Oregon, and arrested last year for marijuana possession has now been suspended without pay for the 1st game of the 2015 season for a “violation of the league’s substance abuse policy.” This is clearly part of football’s strict “10 strikes and you’re out” policy.

 

An unnamed NBC source told Vanity Fair that Brian Williams “could not say the words ‘I lied.’ …He couldn’t explain what had happened. Asking ‘Did something happen to [my] head? Maybe I had a brain tumor, or something in my head?'”

Sounds increasingly clear that Williams was in the wrong business, He sounds less like a newsman than a politician.

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Despite a perhaps less than stellar record, Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel has won re-election. Should we be surprised? The town’s residents have a long history of supporting the “devil you know.” I mean, how many people have given up being Cubs fans?

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Lots of headlines about Derick and Jill Dillard (neé Duggar, of “19 Kids and Counting” having their first baby last night…. And thinking, as popular as this show is in some circles, wonder what the reaction would be if they were African-American?

 

Don McLean’s ‘American Pie’ manuscript sold for $1.2 million, Now, “American Pie” is iconic enough that even the younger generation knows the song. But many of them are wondering “What’s a manuscript?”

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A white police officer has been arrested and charged with murder after a video showed him repeatedly shooting and killing a 50 year old black man who was running away. Well, this might get some changes made. Wonder how many states will outlaw cellphone videos?

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The scariest thing about ‪#‎WalterScott‬ video is wondering how many of these shootings have happened where there is no cellphone video.

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Rand Paul is the latest to declare for 2016. While Paul has many interesting libertarian policies, he’s also come up with gems like this, opposing mandatory vaccination because of “many tragic cases of walking, talking normal children who wound up with profound mental disorders after vaccines.” Sigh ‪#‎Cantfixstupid‬ Even with medical school degrees.

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Opening Day- Closing night

April 6, 2015

On Opening Day at Yankee Stadium, A-Rod apparently got the loudest ovation of any player when he was introduced. Figures, most comics work nights and had the day off.

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The NY Times reported today that Jeb Bush listed himself as Hispanic on his 2009 voter registration form. So where is Donald Trump’s call for Jeb’s birth certificate?

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Anyone but me think Mike Krzyzewski must have a really scary looking portrait in an attic somewhere? ‪#‎NationalChampionship‬ ‪#‎Duke‬

 

Two controversial calls down the stretch that both went the Blue Devils’ way should do wonders for Duke continuing to be universally loved across the country.

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Bo Ryan, 67, would have become the oldest coach in NCAA tournament history to win his first national championship if Wisconsin won tonight. 67?! Makes Ryan about the average age of the San Antonio Spurs.

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The Los Angeles Dodgers won 6-3 today, but Clayton Kershaw gave up 3 runs in 6 innings. That’s it, he’s clearly over the hill.

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Pedroia and Ramirez on space for 324 home runs each. Pablo Sandoval on pace for 486 strikeouts. ‪#‎OpeningDay‬ ‪#‎Redsox‬ ‪#‎SFGiants‬

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So much for all those who thought Kentucky could beat an NBA team. Of course, they still might be able to beat the Lakers.

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The Cubs went 0-13 with runners in scoring position and lost 3-0 on “opening night.” So how many of the Wrigley faithful are breaking out new “Wait until next year” t-shirts?

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From my friend Scott Russell. “It is apropos that the Red Sox play Boston College in their exhibition opener and the Philadelphia Phillies on opening day.” Scott does not say whether he believes Boston College or the Phillies to have been tougher competition.

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In most of Europe, Easter Monday is still a holiday. So why did we in the US fight for independence again?

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The playoffs may be different, but for Sunday night, age and treachery still overcome youth and skill. ‪#‎Spurs‬ ‪#‎Warriors‬

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In Albuquerque, New Mexico, a father allegedly decided he was too drunk to drive, and got his 13-year-old son to take him on a beer run. Then dad got into an argument in the store and fired his gun eight times. (fortunately hitting no one.)  He was arrested by cops who were conducting a DWI checkpoint across the street.   Your move, Florida.

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So in Missouri, a GOP lawmaker has proposed that a bill that would ban food stamps for being used to buy “cookies, chips, energy drinks, soft drinks, seafood or steak.” Yeah, because you’d hate to have them waste money on tunafish? ‪#‎dotheythinkbeforetheycomeupwiththeselaws‬?

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And then there were 2.

April 5, 2015

Some Kentucky players didn’t shake Wisconsin’s hands, Andrew Harrison calls Kaminsky the N-word. Guess another problem with the one-and-done mentality is that not only do professors not teach them anything, Calipari didn’t teach them how to lose.

 

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But really, Wisconsin had motivation from a Final Four loss last year late on a Kentucky 3-point shot.  Had many Wildcats been revenge minded from 2014 they’d have had to track down high school opponents.

 

Frank Kaminsky said of the racial slur from Andrew Harrison after the racial slur last night.  “He reached out to me, we talked about it, [I’m] over it, Nothing needs to be made out of it.”Classy of Frank.  Of course, maybe it helps that  a- this might have been the first time that a white guy from Illinois with Polish heritage got attacked with the N word, and b – the Badgers won.

 

At least 29 arrests in Lexington after Kentucky’s loss to Wisconsin last night. Come on, can’t they make it 38 misdemeanors and 1 felony?

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Well, on the brighter side for Kentucky players, they’ll get a lot more comfortable in losing next year playing next year for the 76ers, Lakers, Knicks…

 

Apparently after the semi-final game, Kentucky fans were rioting and lighting things on fire in the streets. Imagine how classy they would have been if the Wildcats actually won.

 

“Tell him good bye.” ‪#‎LonSimmns‬, 91, has passed away. Another great who will not outlast Candlestick. ‪#‎Byebyebaby‬

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Rick Santorum, “Tolerance is a two-way street. If you’re a print shop and you are a gay man, should you be forced to print ‘God hates fags’ for the Westboro Baptist Church because they hold those signs up?” Uh oh. Is Santorum feeling so confident that he’s willing to risk the truly looney vote?

 

The Obama family attended Easter Sunday Alexandria’s Alfred Street Baptist Church, a predominantly African-American church. No doubt the reaction from many conservatives was split between accusing the President of pandering to minorities, to saying this confirmed his Muslim Baptist tendencies.

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Easter thoughts…

April 5, 2015

Starting with Dean Martin, every bunny loves some bunny, sometime…..

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And remember, love may fade, but marshmallow Peeps are forever.

 

While Americans eat plenty of lamb at Easter, rabbit is never on the menu. A fringe benefit of being the bearer of chocolate eggs!

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An autographed Jay Cutler football received no bids at a Chicago charity auction. Well, to be fair, apparently a number of people tried but their bids could not be completed.

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Lost in the sad story about all the SF cops suspended over texts that apparently targeted blacks, Mexicans, Filipinos and gay men, is the fact that one man resigned before he could be suspended. And that officer is a 23 year old veteran who is himself openly gay. ‪#‎equalopportunityasshole‬

 

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Note to ‪#‎ESPN‬ they call it “‪#‎OpeningDay‬ for a reason. Starting the MLB season on a Sunday night is BS.

 

The latest SF Giants causality – occasional left-fielder Travis Ishikawa will start 2015 on the DL with an back injury. Are we sure this Bonds guy is REALLY retired?

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While the new Jumbotron at Wrigley Field will be up and running tomorrow, the renovated bleachers won’t be ready for several weeks at least. So which will come first, the stadium renovation completion, or the Cubs being eliminated in 2015?

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When Florida State CB P.J. Williams was arrested for DUI yesterday morning, he allegedly told the arresting officer “He played football for FSU and just wanted to go home.” So apparently no one ever told Williams they have cabs in Tallahassee?

(Points for consistency though: in November, 2014, Williams was featured in a NY Times article on preferential treatment given to Seminoles players by local police, reporting that he should have been charged with a hit and run on Oct. 5, but was given only two traffic tickets. #cantfixstupid)

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Bus to hell time. A man fatally shot himself at Universal Studios, California yesterday behind the “Despicable Me” ride. Okay, if someone was going to commit suicide at a theme park didn’t most of us have it figured to be at the prospect of another turn at “It’s a Small World?”

 

From my funny friend Alex Kaseberg. But ever competitive, Bill and Hillary want to know why they weren’t considered for this joke.

“Antarctica reported a record high temperature of 63 degrees. That makes the coldest place in the world Bruce Jenner and Kris Jenner’s old bedroom.”

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Is Wilson available?

April 3, 2015

Off the coast of North Carolina, a man was rescued from atop his overturned sailboat after being lost at sea for 66 days. Presumably they’ve already optioned Tom Hanks for the movie.

 

Tiger Woods has announced that he is playing the the Masters. And why not? He’ll still have his weekend free.

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So with all this talk about “religious freedom” and “Christian values” etc, isn’t it time for some pharmacy owner to stand up and say, for starters he/she will refuse to fill Viagra prescriptions for unmarried or divorced men?

 

Congrats to Sarah Thomas, who will this fall become the NFL’s first full time woman official. All kidding aside, if she has been able to deal with the abuse it took to become a football official in the first place, Thomas should be just fine in dealing with NFL players.

 

Former Florida State DB P.J. Williams was arrested this morning in Tallhassee, FL and charged with DUI. Williams is projected as an NFL first round draft pick. So is Williams trying to be drafted by the 49ers, Redskins or Cowboys?

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A British couple who won a million pounds in the lottery in 2013, won another such jackpot last Friday. Wouldn’t you think one of the first things most people would do with a million pounds is stop playing the lottery?

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And okay, no one has details on the UN pact.  But so for Republicans, what would be worse than President Obama being part of a Nuclear Deal with Iran? Being unable to come to a deal with Iran? Or was he wrong to negotiate in the first place? ‪#‎somanywaystobewrong‬.

 

 

Okay, we’ve upped the ante lately but so alas this probably won’t be an overall award winner for 2015. But can we give the “bat sh*t crazy” award for April to Michele Bachman with this FB update

 

“With his Iran deal, Barack Obama is for the 300 million souls of the United States what Andreas Lubitz was for the 150 souls on the German Wings flight – a deranged pilot flying his entire nation into the rocks. After the fact, among the smoldering remains of American cities, the shocked survivors will ask, why did he do it?”

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States of confusion.

April 2, 2015

A new law in Kansas allows unlicensed possession of concealed firearms and eliminates the mandate for weapons training to carry a concealed gun in a public place. Well, heck, why not just get rid of driver’s licenses while they’re at it. ‪#‎whatcouldpossiblygowrong‬?

 

 

In Oklahoma, the House passed a bill restricting ALL marriages to people of faith, and requiring all marriage licenses to be approved by a member of the clergy. Well if this passes guess Oklahoma will have the new title of the “most bastards in the U.S.””

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After many threatened boycotts of the state, Indiana’s lawmakers have come up with a amendment to their “religious freedom” law, which says it cannot be used as a legal defense by those who deny goods and services to customers because of their sexual orientation or gender. So money may not be able to buy happiness, but in this case it has apparently bought tolerance.

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A Leesburg woman was arrested for DUI after she drove to a McDonalds, ordered, and then apparently was too drunk to drive to the pick up window. When police were called they found her wearing only a bra and panties. Back on your game, Florida.

 

The NY Jets are rumored to be thinking of trading up to acquire Marcus Mariota. And Mariota is thinking “hmm, is it too late to get that last year of college eligibility back?

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So was “Happy Good Friday” one of the original oxymorons?

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Kourtney Kardashian has posted a photo of her 3 month old son – Reign Aston Disick. Well, it’s a good thing there’s money in reality television. Because with that name this kid is going to need a lot of money for therapy.

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The Palo Alto Fire Department says a teacher at Palo Alto High School suffered first- and second-degree burns  when a science experiment went wrong. Have to wonder, how many of the students will be writing this up as a “traumatic event” for next year’s college application essays

 

 

So apparently the US, Russia, China, France, the UK and Germany have a tentative nuclear deal with Iran. Would be a little easier to take the GOP condemnation of ANY deal if just one of them would go volunteer to fight a war as an alternative

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No whine before its time.

April 1, 2015

Governor Jerry Brown has called for 25% percent mandatory water use reduction in California. So okay, it’s now our civic responsibility to drink wine!

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Don’t THINK this is an April Fool’s. Barbara Walters apparently wants Monica Lewinsky to join “The View.” Where no doubt besides doing interviews Monica will have a forum for telling America that she just wants to be left alone.

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So Kentucky is heading towards a potential 40-0 season. Greatest basketball team of all time? Or more like the greatest crop of high school recruits making a pit stop on the way to the NBA?

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All this excitement from millennials over the new Apple watch. What’s the next new thing going to be – the Apple calculator?

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A woman was arrested at San Jose International Airport after a UPS employee saw her walking inside a fence, the 5th such security breach at the airport in a year. It’s apparently easier to get over a fence at San Jose than to get a bottle of water past TSA.

 

Gary Dahl, 78. the inventor of the Pet Rock has died. And if you think “the what?” guessing you are not a baby boomer.

 

Now that Pet Rocks are back in the news suppose it’s only a matter of time until PETA posthumously vilifies Gary Dahl for not respecting the rights of rocks.

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Senator Bob Menendez of New Jersey has been indicted on Federal Corruption charges. Your move, Illinois.

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McDonald’s announced they are raising working pay at all their company-owned U.S. restaurants. So that their employees can now afford to eat somewhere besides McDonald’s?

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Seahawks LB Bruce Irvin sent out a tweet this morning that he’d been arrested for a DUI, then 30 minutes later said it was an April Fool’s joke.   Hmm, how drunk did he have to think it would be funny to make that joke?

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Now the Republican-lead House the Arkansas has passed a “Religious Freedom Restoration Act” of its own. And Wal-Mart immediately issued a statement saying it threatened to undermine “the spirit of inclusion” in the state and “does not reflect the values we proudly uphold.”

Again, impressive. Who knew you could get WAL-MART on the moral high ground?

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Anyone but me think at first that ‪#‎Walmart‬ coming out in support of gay rights was an ‪#‎AprilFools‬ joke? ‪#‎thetimestheyareachangin‬

 

From Marc Ragovin   “The NY Mets announced today that injured second baseman Daniel Murphy, who recently said he would be uncomfortable with a gay teammate, will need to undergo a rehab assignment before he can come off the disabled list. And word is he’s insisting on going to Indiana.”

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Fight on!

April 1, 2015

USC AD Pat Haden tweeted today he will skip the College Football Playoff meeting this week in Indianapolis. “I am the proud father of a gay son In his honor, I will not be attending the FP committee meeting in Indy this week.” Impressive work by Indiana, who knew you could give USC the moral high ground?

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After supporting the new “religious freedom” law strongly, Indiana Governor Mike Pence today said “we’ll fix this and we’ll move forward.” Translation, “we had no idea that even old boys’ clubs NCAA and NFL would be against it. and we’ve $uddenly got million$ of rea$on$ to rethink thi$.”

 

New “Daily Show” host Trevor Noah is taking heat for tweets from a few years back that were misogynistic and/or racist. This should be interesting, Noah may turn off some regular viewers, but he might be the first person on the show to be defended on FOX News.

 

 

We’ll see how it plays out with Trevor Noah’s offensive tweets. But was anyone but me just a bit annoyed that the Daily Show had to go all the way to South Africa to find someone to replace Jon Stewart, rather than hiring a woman?

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Coach K and his former player-assistant coach both have chances to hoist banners this year. ‪#‎Stanford‬ ‪#‎Duke‬ ‪#‎NITTournament‬ ‪#‎NCAATournament‬

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The average salary this year in Major League Baseball will top $4.25 million. You know what that means. Beer prices are going up.

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Phil Jackson, trying to reassure Knicks season tickets holders for next year said “We have a clear plan.” Uh, so did Custer.

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Josie Canesco, 18, daughter of Jose, was arrested for alleged DUI this morning. Maybe the apple doesn’t stagger far from the tree.

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Alabama RB Tyren Jones was already suspended for “conduct not to the standard of the football program. Now he was arrested for marijuana possession, the third Crimson Tide player arrest in four days. Yep, Nick Saban really is running an NFL type program.

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Asked why Tampa should make him the first NFL pick this year, Jameis Winston responded “Because I’m the best player in this draft.” Well, it’s a better answer than “Florida has cheap crab legs.”

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New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft said today in court that Aaron Hernandez told him he was innocent of murder. Well, and why would Kraft think anyone connected with the Patriots would have reason to lie?

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Just a hint to political fundraisers – putting “URGENT” on emails asking for donations is a great way to get things urgently put into the spam box.

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Tough time to be a environmentally conscious Californian. Starbucks gives you a 10 cent discount for bringing a reusable cup. But washing that cup takes water…..

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From Gary M, in response to my suggestion that the Falcons pay guys from local frats rather than paying a fine to pipe in crowd noise…. “Good idea, but the frats probably can’t make bail till after the weekend.”

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