Archive for October 2017

There can be only one.

October 31, 2017

I guess not even Verlander is Madbum.

Going to miss baseball after World Series.  Not going to miss in-game YouTube commercials.

 

Can we make it a felony offense for 1st person who says “Game 7, win or go home.” #WorldSeries

Someone paid over $71,000 for 4 tickets behind home plate for game 7. Not sure who it is but pretty sure they don’t need a tax cut.

Wait a minute, what were all these zeroes going up on scoreboard? Are we sure Astros Dodgers playing same game as Game 5?

Liriano gets big outs in #WorldSeries. And #SFGiants fans, once again, remember A J Pierzynski trade. The gift that keeps on giving.

So Dave Roberts actually had audacity to challenge call based on a rule his own 2nd baseman caused with a dirty slide #ChaseUtley

Houston Texans say Jadeveon Clowney’s prison-jumpsuit Halloween costume wasn’t meant as jab at team owner.  Right.   And McNair didn’t mean to insult players…

Man & woman were cited after she was seen performing oral sex on him in seats on Delta flight from Los Angeles to Detroit. Regular fliers shocked – most of us don’t have room to cross our legs.

Now it’s Jeremy Piven. Beginning to think that most men in Hollywood are assholes.

NPR’s top editor latest to face sexual assault allegations. Let’s face it, no political persuasion or profession is free from douchebags.

Despicable killer in Manhattan today had fake guns. Imagine if he were REALLY armed.

Same people who said “Now is not time” to talk about gun control after Las Vegas are now already calling for more extreme vetting….

 

 

To all those sarcastically asking about more strict regulation of truck rentals. Deal. As long as we can do the same with guns.

Bus to hell time. Police in Japan found nine dismembered bodies stored in cat litter in a man’s apartment today. Speaking as a woman not sure I want to hear “crazy cat LADY” ever again

Many White House staff guilty, all beginning to distrust others. This is like live-action version of Agatha Christie’s “Ten Little Indians.”

I’m so old I remember when John Kelly was supposed to be the adult in the White House.

On matter of women’s suffrage does John Kelly think America should have compromised by men letting women watch elections?

Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Robert E Lee: “All of our leaders have flaws, that doesn’t diminish their contributions to our country”

Well, actually Benedict Arnold was a great American general in the Revolutionary War, until he wasn’t.

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Arson squads

October 30, 2017

Confused, at what point in World Series game 5 would a team have had to go for 2?

Fox during Game 5 was talking about “Jr Home Run Derby.” I thought that’s what we were watching.

At this rate, Bill Miller’s strike zone is going to end up on a milk carton.

Would love to see faces of whole lot of people who went to bed early on East Coast Sunday night because Dodgers  &  Kershaw had a 4-0 lead.  And then a 7-4 lead.

 

I trust A.J. Hinch has told Verlander he’s going nine innings in game 6.

Saddest post game 5 #WorldSeries thought. After one or two more games there will be no baseball until Spring Training.

 

SF Giants bullpen meltdown in 2016 NLDS Game 4 against Cubs one of worst in recent memory. Dodgers & Astros bullpens “Hold our beer.”

Patriots trade QB Jimmy Garoppolo to 49ers. New England gets 2nd round pick, Garoppolo gets month of January 2018 off.

Important reminder for the morning. Robert Mueller is a Republican.

“Also there is no COLLUSION” is Trumpian for “I did not have illegal relations with that Kremlin.”

So watching FoxNews & reading @realDonaldTrump tweets appears there were no limits to how far Hillary Clinton would go to lose 2016 election.

 

Got it. Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Donald Trump expect indictments any day now of President Hillary Clinton.

Guessing Sean Spicer is sitting at home right now with a big grin on his face.

 

Who says you can’t keep a secret in DC?  Robert Mueller had Papadopoulus arrested in July?

Who expected both the Netflix and real-life House of Cards might collapse in the same week?

 

Jared Kushner made a secret trip to Saudi Arabia this weekend. Saudi Arabia has no extradition treaty with the US. Coincidence?

 

Allegations against Kevin Spacey would be just as bad if it were 14 yr-old GIRL. His coming out should have nothing to do it it. Period.

 

Sad that we’re getting to point in USA where one of reactions to Kevin Spacey allegations is “Who’s going to be next?”

So “everyone knew” about Weinstein and Spacey? Who else does “everyone” know about. And would they just speak up now? Seriously.

Maybe Papadopoulus at 30 is too old to claim naivete & look for redemption But hey, in world where Donald Trump Jr, 39, is a “good boy…”

 

 

As of Monday night no tweets from @realDonaldTrump for about 14 hours. So who in the White House hid his phone?

In game 5.

October 29, 2017

This Astros bullpen is reminding SF Giants fans a little too much of the Giants bullpen.

Of course then Dodgers bullpen “Hold our beer.”

Noticed no woman assistant helping George H.W. Bush get his wheelchair onto the field before Game 5.

 

Because we all turn into the #WorldSeries to watch umpire Bill Miller give us his artistic interpretation of the strike zone? @byrnes22

Ken Giles, with World Series ERA of 27.00, has been temporarily demoted as Astros closer. Picked a bad time to emulate SF Giants bullpen.

Davey Martinez new Nationals manager, 7th since 2005 move from Montreal. Even by Steinbrenner standards that’s impressive.#CurseofLesExpos?

Wondering how many cats in costumes pictures posted for #NationalCatDay were taken before visits to emergency room for photographers?

 

Stanford lucky w/ late fumble, just beat OSU 15-14 as 23-pt favorite, moved up in top 25. So good this week East coast viewers were asleep?

Billionaires need a tax cut like the #WorldSeries needs more #YouTubeTVcommercials.

That moment when you realize Penn State behavior over Sandusky/Paterno makes you okay with them losing to Urban Meyer & Ohio State.

 

Least popular Halloween 2007 costume must be Mike Pence. Not just that it’s dull, but you can’t go ANYWHERE w/o wife by your side.

Puerto Rico has just ADMITTED 991 deaths from Hurricane Maria. Dear gawd, what would it have taken for Trump to give himself a “9?”

 

Were the alleged death threats against now fired Florida coach Jim McElwain from the evil architects of the Bowling Green massacre?

A man & woman arrested for looting in Santa Rosa today. Cue anti-immigrant rants. Except they’re Caucasians from Monterey. Oops, never mind.

Poll shows 71% of Americans believe US politics have reached dangerous low point. Shocking. 29% think we can go lower?

“Imposter syndrome” a problem for many powerful women. But Hillary would be 1st to actually commit crimes to keep herself from White House.

If you only read or watch Fox News you’re probably going to be surprised that Mueller indictments Monday don’t include Hillary Clinton.

Penny Young Nance, Trump’s rumored choice for Ambassador at-large for Global Women’s Issues “The question for us as moms is when we bring our daughters to see Frozen, we often have our little boys sitting there, and is this message helpful? We want them to know that they’re essential. We want to raise heroes. We want to raise real men that will stick in their families and be great dads and be great providers and great husbands.”
She seems nice.
#WTF?

Sooner or later

October 27, 2017

For all new baseball fans who figured after game 1 of #WorldSeries that games took about 2 1/2 hours…. guess what, fun’s over. #Game3

Long suffering Astros fans have to be feeling just a bit optimistic after game 3, with Houston up 2-1.  But okay, shouldn’t series against Dodgers be NLCS?

 

Rumors of Casey,Anthony & OJ Simpson collaborating on a reality show. Ah for the days when that would be most horrifying story on Twitter.

 

 

Damn good thing #HoustonTexans in no danger of winning Super Bowl any time soon; locker room photo op w/ owner would be a little forced.

 

Of all NFL owners Houston Texans owner Bob McNair was biggest donor to Trump. “That’s shocking” said nobody.

Miami Dolphins coach Adam Case “We’re the worst offense in football.”
Cleveland Browns – “Who are we, chopped liver?”

 

I’m so old I remember when Halloween was a one day holiday and not a weekend.

 

Wikileaks is offering $100,000 reward for Kennedy docs still kept secret. Uh, how much for the Trump tax returns?

Now it’s #TomSteyer. Can @realDonaldTrump name one person who has attacked him that he doesn’t slam as crazy or fake?

 

Sarah Huckabee Sanders  says all women accusing Trump of sexual assault are lying. Waiting for Fox & Friends to say assaulter was really Bill Clinton.

Trump handing candy to child “You have no weight problems, that’s the good news.” Didn’t have to see picture to know it was a little girl.

 Got it. All Donald Trump’s accusers are liars; all Bill Clinton’s accusers are honest saints. WTF is wrong w/people?

 

Written Friday night – What agony for Trump Saturday morning. So many to attack as fake, so little time.

 

Guessing all vacations and days off Monday for political reporters have been canceled? #Mueller

 

In  many ways it’s not Trump’s behavior that’s the scariest thing in USA now. It’s that almost 40 percent still support him.

All out of love.

October 26, 2017

Not sure if #BryceLove has a chance for Heisman. But the way #Stanford played withou him, he sure looks like college MVP.

He pronounces it Crist,  But Stanford QB today had lots of fans screaming “Jesus Christ.”

#Cubs just dismissed their pitching, hitting & third base coaches after losing in NCLS. Wow, one win after a century and talk about greedy.

Joe Torre and MLB admit now that blown call in NLDS game five led to the Cubs scoring 2 runs that should never have scored. And Washington lost 9-8.  Does this mean the Nats should rehire Dusty Baker?

Joe Girardi fired as manager of #Yankees because he couldn’t get them far enough in playoffs. #Padres fans are thinking ‘What are playoffs?

I’m sure there’s a story here…. United flight 404 from Houston to San Francisco landed at 931am. Pulled into gate at 1107am. No joke.
So not enough passengers paid a gate parking fee?

Donald Trump Jr.  tweeted ” To those saying Flake sacrificed his career to take on Trump, just remember it’s not sacrifice when you admit you have 0 chance of winning!”

Hey Jr, thinking big game hunting is not a sport when you have 0 chance of getting shot by an animal.

“Just Say No – The Sequel” will work as well with opioid crisis as abstinence-only education works for combating teen pregnancy.

Guardian headline is all you need to know about today’s photo op: “Trump declares health emergency over opioids but no new funds to help.”

 

Hope those in GOP excusing George H.W.’s groping as nice old man in wheelchair prepared to make same concession in 20 yrs for Bill Clinton.

Billionaires need a tax cut like Fox News needs more blonde women on-air.

First ISIS, then healthcare, now the opioid crisis. Trump can fix everything immediately: “This was an idea that I had: if we can teach young people not to take drugs. The fact is, if we can teach young people and people generally not to start, it’s really really easy not to take them.”
Suppose it would be wrong to look forward to the next time anyone in the Trump family needs minor surgery, and asks their doctor for prescription painkillers. #Justsayno

Fit to be tied.

October 25, 2017

As SF Giants fans know Kruk would say  after World Series Game 2 – “laugher.”


And now the Series goes back to Houston, Texas, where they play baseball in sane temperatures.

Although given the way the Astros bats came alive late on a hot hot night in Los Angeles, maybe they’ll open the roof.

Good news for Dodgers fans who left in 7th inning of World Series Game 2. They missed Astros comeback & extra innings win.

People saying after Tuesday night that #WorldSeries  was over.  And yeah, the last time starting pitcher so dominant in game 1 was Bob Gibson in 1968.   Oops, never mind

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No Tony Parker, no Kawhi Leonard – both still out w/ injuries. So of course everyone had @Spurs as last undefeated team in NBA. #GoSpursGo

Former @NBA commissioner David Stern thinks medical marijuana should be taken off the league’s banned substance list. Well, it’s high time.

‘UNC point guard Joel Berry II broke his hand when he punched a door after losing a video game to a teammate. If only he were armed.

 

Handwritten note from Einstein on his theory of happiness just sold for $1.56 million. Did it include “Don’t spend over $1 million on notes?

New Gallup poll -64% of Americans support legalizing pot, 51% of GOP. That doesn’t even count 20% who said “dude, what was that ? again?”

 

First rule of being a very intelligent person. Don’t say “I’m a very intelligent person.”

National Park entry fees may go up to $70 next year. Well, somehow US has to find the way to cover all those Trump golf weekends.

Trump says now  he didn’t “specifically” authorize Niger mission-“I’ve been seeing it just like you’ve been seeing it” Buck stops anywhere but here.   #sad

Regarding all those GOP senators who gave Trump a standing ovation. Would he care to name them? Before the next election please.

Hillary’s campaign made mistakes. But they would have been stupidest political campaign in history if they didn’t do opposition research.

 

No joke, House to hold hearings on bill banning abortions after 6 weeks. Good thing GOP believes so strongly in free birth control. #WTF?

 

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Oh please oh please can someone ask Trump if he’s a member of Mensa?

Fast pitch

October 24, 2017

Best thing about tonight’s #WorldSeries game. Big $$$ that FOX is losing on commercials because the game only went 2 1/2 hours.

2 1/2 hours?  Guessing most fans spent more time getting in and out of the parking lot.

Curtis Granderson not on Dodgers World Series roster. So much for great interviews where he could explain  (seriously) his theory that moon landing was faked.

Actual empty seats behind home plate #WorldSeries gm 1 in top 3rd. You’d think anyone w/ that much $$$ wouldn’t need to worry about traffic.

 

I miss the days when the most embarrassing news every morning usually involved the Kardashians.

And if we didn’t have enough to be outraged about, my first Christmas catalog arrived in the mail today.

This time Senators would have to re-title the play about selling your soul for a win from Damn Yankees to Damn Tax Cuts.

Everyone wondering what W said to Obama to make him giggle while Clinton was talking about PR & USVI. Guessing phrase w/ “Virgin” in it.

So much winning. It’s only taken 9 months to go from #MAGA to #AlerttheDaycareStaff

Kid Rock “F— no, I’m not running for Senate. Are you kidding me?” Translation, being amateur in govt doesn’t look as much fun as it did?

 

EPA Sec. Scott Pruitt bought $25,000 secure soundproof communications booth for office. What happened to good old-fashioned cone of silence?

(but seriously, isn’t that what closing doors is for?)

 

Trump tweet on today’s lunch. “So nice being w/ Republican Senators today. Multiple standing ovations!” Would GOP like to say who stood?

Trump claims “multiple standing ovations” today at GOP lunch. If ever a time for those who respect US to have taken knee.

If Trump really did have GOP Senators standing up during their lunch guessing it might have been because too much spice in taco bowls.

Billionaires need a tax cut like financial companies needed relief from class-action lawsuits.

Devin Nunes investigating 7-yr-old Russian Clinton uranium deal story debunked as Fake News. What’s next, more on Obama’s birth certificate?

 

GOP Senate just voted to gut Obama rule allowing class-action lawsuits vs s financial companies. Hey, in Wells Fargo & Equifax we trust.

Let’s be clear, Senators Corker & Flake don’t oppose Trump radical conservative plans, just his style that may prevent getting them done.

3 weeks ago Sunday, some NFL players knelt for anthem & 600 people shot in Las Vegas. Guess which still has Trump’s attention. #Priorities

Bill O’Reilly -“Am I mad at God? Yeah I’m mad at him.” Uh, Bill, maybe it’s “God is coming and boy is SHE pissed.”