The Super Bowl, Oscars and other hype…

Posted February 3, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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The NFL’s greed knows no bounds. The league has ordered local New Orleans vendors to stop selling shirts with the Saints slogan. Now they will now be fining the Super Bowl’s major halftime act, and ordering them to cover their name. After all, the band is trying to use half the phrase “Who Dat.”

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Besides this being Super Bowl Weekend,, Nascar is having the oddly-named “Budweiser Shootout” at Daytona International Speedway Saturday. Who’s going to waive the checkered flag, Gilbert Arenas?

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Carrie Underwood will sing the National Anthem for the Super Bowl. Apparently Carrie’s enough of a football fan that when the league asked her last December, she realized it was one time she’d be sure not to have to watch her ex – Tony Romo.

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The Oscar nominations came out today, including two for “The Blind Side.” Many Oscar watchers were shocked, two nominees for a sports drama and no acting nomination for “I didn’t take steroids to hit home runs” by Mark McGwire?

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“The Blind Side” is the highest grossing football movie of all time. Although those who haven’t seen the movie actually think it’s the answer to a question. “Whose side is Congress on in this healthcare debate?”

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New York Jets Rex Ryan was fined $50,000 for making the “finger” sign at a mixed martial arts event last weekend. But in Ryan’s defense, after coaching in New York for a while, he figured it was the Jets’ fans equivalent of a victory sign.

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Rahm Emmanuel apologized after Sarah Palin called him out for referring to some liberal Democrats as “f*****g retarded.” He said he should have referred to them as “Palin-esque”

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Jenny Sanford says her soon-to-be-ex-husband Mark asked her for advice during his affair, wondering “if he should follow his heart to Argentina and if he would live a life of regret if he didn’t?” That’s it, John Edwards, while a favorite, is no longer a lock to win worst husband of the year.

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Actually it really was amazing to read in Jenny’s book that her husband actually asked if he should leave her for the mistress he felt he was in love with…. One would expect to read such a statement posthumously at her murder trial.

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As the Super hype continues…

Posted February 2, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Rain forced media day at the Super Bowl indoors today. The Florida storm, however, did not flood the streets. Disappointing all those reporters who wanted to see Peyton Manning walk to today’s interview.

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President Obama is taking some grief for his use of a teleprompter. You do get the feeling, however, that if George W. Bush was accused of over-reliance on a teleprompter that Fox News would headline the story “President displays exceptional reading skills.”

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When asked about his verbal gaffes, GOP chairman Michael Steele responded -“Accidents happen, baby.” Didn’t he steal that line from John Edwards?

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Or in Edwards’ case the punctuation is different:
“Accidents happen. Baby.

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A new museum has opened in London – Abbaworld. No joke. With original costumes amongst other mementos. And of course nonstop music. Should be great for the London economy. Because men will hear about it from their wives and say “Honey, could we go shopping instead?.

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“This just in; Brett Favre has announced he is going to get a Facebook page. As soon as he decides on his status.”

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Legendary newspaper writer Herb Caen died 13 years ago today. Already there are young people and young adults in the SF Bay Area who are asking “Who’s Herb Caen?” Let’s hope in 13 more years the same demographic isn’t asking “What’s a newspaper?”

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Suspended Wizards guard Gilbert Arenas wrote a contrite op-ed for the Washington Post, acknowledging among other things that guns “are not joking matters,” and that he deserved his suspension. Arenas also pledges to try to “right his wrongs,” especially insofar as the example his behavior set for young people…

Let’s see, a thoughtful apology actually accepting responsibility…. This settles it, Arenas doesn’t belong in Washington.

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Johannesburg’s Sunday Times newspaper, citing unnamed friends of the woman’s family, reported that 67 year old South African President Jacob Zuma has had a child with a woman who is not one of his three wives nor his fiance. This is not expected to affect his career.

In related news, John Edwards announced he is moving to South Africa.

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Scott McCarron, who allegedly called Phil Mickelson a “cheater” for using a particular kind of sand wedge, now clarifies his remarks by saying “‘It’s cheating.” but “I never called Phil Mickelson a cheater.”

I think I like “it depends what the definition of is is” better.

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Quarterbacks, the Pro Bowl, and other jokes…

Posted February 1, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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No matter what happens in the Super Bowl. on Feb 14, Drew Brees will be King for the New Orleans Mardi Gras Bacchus parade, which means he will stand on a float and toss beads, coins and mini footballs to parade goers. Other parade organizers thought of asking LSU grad JaMarcus Russell to do the same thing, but they didnt have enough liability insurance.

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How bad a Senior Bowl week did Tim Tebow have? Rumor has it after the game he got a congratulatory phone call and expression of interest from Al Davis?

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Tebow likes wearing bible verses in his eyeblack. It would be ironic if the most apt might end up being 1 Corinthians 13, the one that starts, “when I was a child” and ends “when I became a man I put away childish things.” (the childish thing being a football?)

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Will Smith has confirmed that he is considering a future career in politics. Makes sense, with those two “Men in Black” movies he’s shown a real talent for dealing with aliens.

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The Pro Bowl and Super Bowl are both played this in the newly named Sun Life Stadium in Miami. The financial services company was founded in Montreal in the 19th century and is now based in Toronto, Canada. Because nothing says “Sun” like… Toronto, Canada?

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Sun Life Stadium was formerly named Land Shark Stadium, and is a dual purpose facility. Which might explain how it was chosen for the Pro Bowl. With the baseball Marlins as tenants it means locals are used to watching meaningless games.

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The problem with the Pro Bowl is that players just don’t care that much and are often just going through the motions while trying to avoid injury. Which means for fans of many teams it’s just a repeat of week 17 of the regular season.
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Matt Schaub was voted MVP of the Pro Bowl. Isn’t that like being voted the best show in NBC’s prime time lineup? Or the best men’s basketball team in the Pac 10?

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What does this say about the Colts’ and Saints’ offenses (or maybe their defenses.). The over-under for the Super Bowl – 56 1/2, is basically the same as it was for the Pro Bowl – 57. And in the Pro Bowl they don’t even really hit and tackle. (Yes, I am aware some would say that especially about the Saints defense.)

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And okay, you don’t even have to know anything about rugby to know how ugly this game was. Cal 99, Stanford 0. No, that is not a typo.

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Too gay for the NFL?

Posted January 31, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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So for the Super Bowl, CBS has okayed an anti-abortion ad featuring Tim Tebow, and rejected a gay dating ad. Hmm, maybe “Mancrunch” should have had the ad say “Reduce potential abortions, encourage more gay dating!”

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But let’s see, NFL players are athletic-looking guys, often with elaborate hairstyles, who dress in tight spandex uniforms. Then they grab at each other, hug after great plays and dance on a regular basis. Yeah, can’t see why the league thinks they would have any gay viewers.

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Once again, you can’t make this stuff up. In the “they just don’t get it” department”, Nike has an ad inside the front cover of ESPN the magazine, and Sports Illustrated featuring Kobe Bryant and Lebron James in a campaign titled “Prepare for combat.”

And in the ad Kobe says, “I’ll do whatever it takes…. I don’t leave anything in the chamber.”

So what’s next, an ad campaign talking about the NBA’s high caliber players.

Or describing someone’s play as “semi-automatic?”

Maybe this is all some karmic revenge for the league’s getting rid of the name “Washington Bullets.”

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The Stanford men’s basketball team has yet to win a game away from Maples this year. And they had only one such win last season. This team might perform worse on the road than Willy Loman.

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In women’s basketball, the second ranked Stanford women have been trailing at halftime in both their last games, but then have come from behind to win handily. Some wonder what coach Tara VanDeveer has said to the women at halftime. Might be as simple as “You’re playing like men.”
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John Edwards apparently claimed to his then-friend Andrew Young that Rielle Hunter had told him she couldn’t get pregnant. Okay, that’s it, forget the morals. The man is too stupid to be president.

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Johnny we hardly knew ye – and we liked you better then too…

Posted January 30, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Should we be that that surprised that John Edwards fathered an illegitimate child? He was late in deciding to pull out of Iraq too.

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It just keeps on coming, now there’s a sex tape featuring John Edwards. And here some people thought Barack Obama made a potentially embarrasing choice for V.P. by picking Joe Biden.

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The New York Yankees are taking the World Series trophy on a tour of Asia. Come on, is this really necessary? Millions of people living right here in America have never actually seen that trophy. They’re called Cubs fans.

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Kurt Warner retired today after a amazing career where he took both the Rams and Cardinals to the Super Bowl. But before that, the 38 year old quarterback played in the Arena Football League, NFL Europe, and even had a stint working in a grocery store.

If he makes it to the Hall of Fame Warner will have a couple tough decisions. St. Louis or Arizona? Paper or plastic?

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For the second time in six months, John Daly has announced he is done with golf. He says he will, however, make an exception for the A T and T Pro-Am, with his partner Brett Favre.

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Samantha Harris is leaving “Dancing with the Stars.” This news disappointed millions of women and about two men.

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While baseball struggles with asterisks and the steroid issue, the NBA has its own problems. For example, should there be an asterisk for any wins this year against the New Jersey Nets.

(for non-NBA fans, the Nets are 4-41. No, that is not a typo.)

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You have to wonder why they call them the “Nets.” Because clearly the team isn’t very good at finding them.

From Alex Kaseberg:

With New Orleans winning 31- 28 over the Minnesota Vikings, the Superdome was a site of joy, celebration and excitement. Less than five years ago after Hurricane Katrina, however, the Superdome was a site of despair, anguish and misery. Or as Chicago Cubs fans call that: Wrigley Field.

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talking about steve.

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The Nets, Wizards, and other jokes…

Posted January 29, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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The Washington Wizards say they want to move forward after the suspensions of Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton. Hello, the team is 14-30. Forward’s about the only direction they can go.

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Any further backwards and they’d be the Washington Generals.

(note, if that last joke was to archaic, the Generals are the perennial rivals to the Harlem Globetrotters.)

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The Nets, 4-40 (no, that’s not a misprint), now take on the Washington Wizards, 14-30, on Friday night. “May the best team win” somehow doesn’t seem like an appropriate comment.

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Even for hardcore Republicans, Barack Obama’s State of the Union did not contain the most unbelievable moment on television Wednesday night; that would have been when they switched to Sportcenter and saw that the New Jersey Nets actually won.

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For serious fans of professional NBA basketball, watching the Nets-Wizards game has to be as appealing as it would be for conservatives to watch a Nancy Pelosi-Hillary Clinton debate…

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John Mayer now says he has masturbated his way out of problems. Yeah, except for “No officer, I wasn’t texting/drinking/using a cellphone while I was driving, I was…oh never mind…give me the ticket…”

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So when is Apple going to start giving out free pink cases for the iPad so you can carry it discreetly in your purse or briefcase?

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NBC is ending the Jay Leno show a few days earlier than planned before the Winter Olympics. Apparently they want to fill the slot with programming that will get higher ratings – like NHL hockey.

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The media is reporting that Tiger Woods is in a sex rehab camp. A camp? Do they go around chanting “Two, four, six, eight, we don’t need to fornicate?

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And from Bill Littlejohn: Reportedly Elin Woods was a guest of the Favres in the past week.No wonder she can’t make up her mind whether to leave Tiger or not”

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Millions of dollars and no women in the focus group?

Posted January 28, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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I’m not the only woman to have thought of something like this, but wouldn’t you think millions (or billions) in development at Apple might have resulted in a name that doesn’t sound like a feminine hygiene product.

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The iPad only stores 64GB of data. For days that you need more power will Apple come up wth the iMaxipad?

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And where is the large screen version for seniors – “iDepends?”

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And will a version targeted to men be known as iFlomax?

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With Kentucky’s loss Tuesday, college basketball will have a new top-ranked team for the fourth time this month. These “number ones” are proving to be as durable as Tiger Woods’ marriage vows.

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Greg Oden will probably be hearing for a long time about his nude pictures that have ended up on the internet. But who knew that Oden’s plans after the NBA included running for the Massachusetts senate?

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NBA commissioner David Stern met with Gilbert Arenas on Wednesday, and suspended the Wizard guard for the remainder of the season. It probably didn’t help that Arenas asked that it be scheduled at “high noon at the Ok Corral.”

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I just don’t think Gilbert Arenas gets it. After he and teammate Javaris Crittenton were suspended for the remainder of the season for their guns in the locker room, he volunteered to host a fundraiser for Haiti. His idea? An All-Star shoot-around.

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The following line inspired by a setup from Max Worthington,

“Erectile dysfunction can be a blessing.”

I’ll bet now John Edwards wishes he had had it.

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Former President George W. Bush called President Obama to give him tips on his first “State of the Union.” For starters Bush said “the speech is misnamed- there are 50 of them.”

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Toyota has stopped selling eight of their most popular models while they fix a problem with the gas pedal. So finally a month that American car sales may catch up with imports.

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No deadline.

Posted January 27, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Minnesota coach Brad Childress said he would “not impose a deadline” on Brett Favre to make a decision about next season. Instead he will focus on his more realistic offseason project – cat herding.

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According to a Halifax newspaper, a Canadian couple are such Toronto hockey fanatics that they will wear Maple Leafs jerseys when they get married Jan. 30. Apparently they wanted to wait until the Leafs were formally eliminated from the playoffs.

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Greg Oden is the latest NBA player facing embarrassment after nude pictures he took for a girlfriend surfaced on the internet. On the other hand, at least the Trailblazers have to be happy that the answer to the question definitely wasn’t that it was a gun in his pocket.

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No word on the rumor that Greg Oden and Gilbert Arenas will be teaming up to star in a movie sequel of “Naked Gun.”

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A scientist speaking at London’s Royal Society says that while we have been looking for extraterrestials, alien life may already be here on earth. If true, my money’s on Keith Richards.

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After the world champion Lakers visited the White House Monday, Kobe Bryant returned for a private meeting with Barack Obama Tuesday. Apparently the President wanted to talk to someone who knows how it feels to never pass anything.

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The countdown begins…

Posted January 26, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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So the League Championship games are over and the interminable hype begins. Two whole weeks for the Super Bowl, and about thirty-two weeks until Brett Favre decides whether or not he will play next season.
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After the Saints 31-28 win, there’s been more complaining about the NFL’s overtime rule. And it’s true, Brett Favre didn’t even get a chance in overtime to throw another interception.

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Headline from Seattle Times: “Brett Favre’s Future a Big Question Mark in Minnesota.”

In related news, it rains sometimes in Seattle.

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The NFL conference championship games last weekend drew the highest television viewership since 1982. Partly this was because the Jets-Colts and Saints-Vikings were compelling matchups. Partly it’s because many Americans now couldn’t afford to do anything else.

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Washington guard Javaris Crittenton pled guilty to a misdemeanor gun charge stemming from his dispute with teammate Gilbert Arenas., and was put on probation. The Wizards may not make the playoffs, but they’re definitely in the running for best shooting team of the year.

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Apparently Tom Brady won’t need surgery on his finger, so he won’t miss any of next year recovering. Which is mostly good news, on the other hand, if he missed much of the 2010 season he could win another “Comeback Player of the Year” award.

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Much media hype about “Avatar” having now passed 1997’s “Titanic” in gross box box office receipts. Not that the movie hasn’t rung up impressive sales. But the average movie ticket price in 1997? About $4.59.

(source- Wikipedia.)

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Commie pinko alert:

Apparently CBS is planning to air an anti-abortion commercial during the Super Bowl featuring Tim Tebow and his mother. If Tebow really wanted to be “pro-life” maybe he should have considered doing a commercial telling all his fellow athletes to pay their child support?

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Are you ready for two weeks without football…

Posted January 25, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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…but of course, two weeks of hype. Starting tonight.

This year the Pro Bowl will be played the weekend between the league championship games and the Super Bowl. But if you are seriously excited about watching the Pro Bowl, it might be a serious sign that you need to get a life.

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Matt Stover, the Colts placekicker, will turn 42 on Wednesday and will be the oldest player ever in the Super Bowl. He did say later that while he looks forward to playing against the Saints, he is sorry he won’t get to face that nice young man, Brett Favre.

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Garrett Hartley, the Saints placekicker, was suspended earlier this year for taking Adderall, a banned stimulant used to treat ADD/ADHD. Apparently he is clean now. when asked about the medication in a post game news conference, Hartley’s response was “Oh, look, a puppy.”

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In general, I have a hard time believing that God cares much about sporting events. On the other hand, maybe we can’t rule out that He likes to reward bipartisan politicians. The only congressperson from either party who crossed party lines to vote for health care – Joseph Cao – from New Orleans.

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A recent poll gave California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger a 27 percent approval rating. And most people figured he couldn’t go any lower than “Jingle all the Way.”

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Watching these Pepsi “throwback” ads, where they are temporarily making the soft drink with “real sugar.” Doesn’t exactly give you a warm fuzzy feeling about whatever they are normally using now.

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And the real anticipation has begun – for the Super Bowl ads. Apparently Boost Mobile, a cellphone company, will air a 30-second spot that will reunite the 1985 Chicago Bears. Says Bill Littlejohn, in the video, “the former Bears will perform a music video called Super Bowl Shuffleboard.’’

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Just when you thought….

Posted January 24, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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That it might be a slow week for comedy now that the on-air Jay Leno-Conan O’Brien feud is at least temporarily over… Here comes the news that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have broken up.

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Another Wikpedia mistake discovered. The current entry for the Nets starts out:

“The New Jersey Nets are a professional basketball team.”

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Sources say the Raiders will retain coach Tom Cable. Translation – they couldn’t find anyone else crazy enough to take the job.

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Meg Whitman is spending at least $39 million of her own money to run for Governor of California, NBC is spending about $45 million to get rid of Conan. ALMOST makes the San Francisco Giants’ paying Barry Zito $126 million for 7 years look reasonable.

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For Conan O’Brien’s last Tonight show, he took the high road. The result was a program that was relatively subdued, but often both gracious and touching. Many viewers, however, were disappointed. Well, duh, do we watch the Indianapolis 500 to see the most skillful, controlled drivers, or do we guiltily look forward to the spectacular wrecks?

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Parents in a Southern California school district wants to ban the Marriam Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary because a child noticed the word(s) “oral sex.”

So much for social studies students in that district ever doing projects on the impeachment of Bill Clinton and the Starr report.

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And this one will be out of date one way or another in about 12 hours, but what the heck….

In tragedy, the heroes must fail in the end, and they must fail for a reason at least partly of their own doing – the fatal flaw – which usually involves hubris. Like deciding you can let a vanquished victim live to fight another day because you don’t care enough to finish him off. Translation, Shakespeare would be rooting for the Jets.

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Conan, we hardly knew ye…

Posted January 23, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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One of the highlights of the last Tonight Show with Conan O’Obrien was a snippet of a segment titled “Puppies dressed as cats.” Which was simply, puppies dressed in cat costumes. Apparently there was consideration of a similar segment, “Cats dressed as puppies,” but it resulted in too many injuries during rehearsal.

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You can’t read entertainment news online anywhere these days without seeing something about Conan, Jay and the Tonight Show. Except NBC.com (Seriously, it’s as if neither show exists.)

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In some ways you really have to hand it to NBC. After all, they had the most successful show at 1130p with a likeable Jay Leno, and a pretty good thing going late night with Conan O’Brien. And in a pretty short time they have managed to turn Jay into a bad guy and send Conan out the door, probably to Fox in seven months. Even by Congressional standards, it’s a world class FUBAR’ed situation.

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Only in California. In the Republican primary for the Governor’s race, Steve Poizner, who has given $19 million to his own campaign, has accused Meg Whitman, who has given $39 million to HER own campaign, of trying to buy the election.

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A top prospect in the Oakland As organization, Grant Desme, has left baseball to join the priesthood. Which is surprising, normally the only people who give up on baseball for a life of prayer are Cubs fans.

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A new study shows that parents of children have lower blood pressure than childless parents. Presumably this result was obtained without counting the parents of teenagers.

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The Supreme Court decision removing previous restrictions on corporate speech rests on the construct of “corporate personhood.” We thought the issue with gays was contentious. So how long until activists call to legalize “corporate marriage?”

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Another thought about this construct of “corporate personhood.” Does this mean the Supreme Court may also rule someday that future mergers must be between a male corporation and a female corporation.

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A United Airlines plane bound for San Francisco had to return to Dulles for an emergency landing 10 minutes after takeoff when a large bird was sucked into one of their engines. Passengers were unharmed but many are demanding credit for the extra 40 frequent flier miles.

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A tacky but funny joke from Jerry Perisho, with my own tacky followup.

Yet another heavy rain day – LA is getting spanked again. Usually, 5 days in a row involves a dominatrix and a “safe word”

Actually what several days of spanking in row in Los Angeles usually means – the Dodgers are in the playoffs.

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An Alaska man was sentenced to a day in jail and a year’s probation for throwing a taco at a Taco Bell manager. During his probation he is not allowed to visit any Taco Bells. Had the judge really wanted to throw the book at him, he would have been sentenced to eat there daily.

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Father’s Day?

Posted January 22, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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John Edwards has admitted he is the father of Rielle Hunter’s baby. So while he was talking about “Two Americas,” who knew he was having children in both of them?

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Now that Edwards has admitted paternity of his mistress’s child, one question comes to mind: How long before potential Tiger cubs surface?

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Shaquille O’Neal wants to save the NBA’s All-Star dunk contest by making it a benefit with superstars for Haiti. Yo, Shaq, really want to get some donations. Get pledges based on how long it would take you to hit a certain number free throws in a row. (And then learn to shoot them.)

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More thoughts about Tiger. When does a man realize he’s a sex addict? When he gets caught.

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John Edwards says he wants to give his new acknowledged daughter the “love and attention” she deserves. Which if you’ve seen her baby pictures should be easy….she’s the next closest thing to John looking in a mirror.

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Ferguson Jenkins says Mark McGwire owes an apology to “all the pitchers he faced while juiced.” While I’m not a steroids fan, does that mean that Roger Clemens et al also owe an apology to all the batters THEY faced while juiced? .

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In California, Republican gubernatorial candidate Steve Poizner has “lent” $19 million to his campaign, while Meg Whitman has “lent” her campaign $39 million. And both of them say they should be elected governor so they can cut down on state spending.

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John McCain’s wife Cindy has come out in favor of gay marriage. Conservatives are not thrilled. On the other hand, they are relieved to hear a Republican “coming out” story that has nothing to do with airport bathrooms.

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The Mourning after….

Posted January 21, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Who knew, the “Hangover” could turn out to be a Democratic documentary for the day after the Massachusetts special election?

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At one point in her Senate campaign, Martha Coakley referred to Red Sox World Series hero Curt Schilling as a “Yankees fan.” In retrospect, that may have been when many voters in effect told her to “put a bloody sock in it.”
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At least Coakley wasn’t asked about Bobby Orr. She might have made some comment about rowing.

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John McCain’s wife Cindy has decided to come out against Proposition 8, the anti-gay marriage initiative in California. In a new ad, Cindy is wearing duct tape across her mouth. Just think of what could have happened had her husband’s campaign tried that strategy with Sarah Palin.
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Tiger Woods now apparently says he’s a “sex addict.” So what’s the difference between a sex addict and most men? Means and opportunity.

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Gavin Newsom gave an interview to Maureen Dowd of the New York Times saying he planned to leave politics in 2012. Later, he called the reporter to say he was “just kidding.” Who knows with the mercurial San Francisco mayor? Maybe he’ll end up playing quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings.

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Now it turns out that besides having a mediocre record at Tennessee and leaving after only a year, Lane Kiffin also wrecked the Lexus loaned to him by the university. Guess this assures that Coach Kiffin will go down in Volunteer history as “Rocky Flop.”

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No NHL team with at least seven players chosen to various Olympic teams has ever won the Stanley Cup. The Sharks have eight players going to Vancouver this year. Well, I guess that streak is safe.

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Four of the Sharks are playing for Canada. If Canada wins the gold, San Jose may ask that the NHL playoffs next year be moved up to February.

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Massachusetts and beyond…

Posted January 20, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Michael Dukakis, John Kerry, Martha Coakley…. Who knew Massachusetts was an old Indian word for “crappy Democratic candidates?”

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Some thought Coakley seemed complacent and arrogant. Apparently she might even be a closet supporter of Bill Belichick.

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True story, a client asked in our California office today about getting a passport for her child to go to Hawaii. The scariest thought, people like this can actually vote.

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Breaking news. Although Benji Molina was sure he had better offers, the veteran catchers ended up returning to the SF Giants for 2010 on a one-year contract at a reduced salary. Apparently those offers didn’t turn out to be as good as he thought. And one reputedly included some duties at 10pm on NBC.

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The San Francisco Giants are offering Lincecum $8 million a year in arbitration. The two-time Cy Young winner is asking for $13 million. San Francisco, however, can point out that perhaps it’s not the first time Tim is a little high.

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Conan O’Brien is reportedly close to an agreement with NBC that would allow him to keep the rights to his creations like “Triumph the Insult Comic Dog”, in exchange for a promise not to disparage the network. With all due respect, how can any comic make NBC look worse than they do themselves?

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Back to politics…have to wonder, with all the Democrats in Massachusetts, how did they come up with a candidate as weak as Martha Coakley? Do the state party leaders moonlight in the programming department of NBC?

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If the Republicans now plan to stall health care reform, however, Barack Obama does have a plan to end the filibuster. He’s going to show it every night on NBC at 10pm.

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Monday mourning quarterbacking…

Posted January 19, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Short post today due to computer performing about as well as the Cowboys’ offense last weekend.

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The Vikings absolutely took apart the Cowboys on Sunday. But to be fair, Brett has had years to learn how to beat Texans. He remembers the Alamo.

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And Favre says this is the best team he has ever been associated with, and the most fun he has had. No, he’s not dissing his former teams. He just can’t remember them.

Sarah Palin will be a VIP honored guest at the Daytona 500. And she plans to wave the checkered flag for the real winner after 250 miles.

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Maria Sharapova wore a much criticized dress that made her resemble a peacock in the Australian Open. And she was ousted in the first round. Maybe it’s not a good idea these days to appear dressed as the NBC mascot.

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Phil Kessel had the Maple Leafs’ team-leading, third winning goal against the Nashville Predators Monday night. Of course, many fans are thinking ‘Isn’t that the Leafs’ sum total of game winning goals?

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Okay, what were the odds- the New York Jets have won more games in January than the New Jersey Nets.

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Are you ready for a week without football…?

Posted January 17, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Or in the cases of San Diego, Dallas, Baltimore and Arizona, make that several months….

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San Diego’s all-pro kicker Nate Kaeding missed three crucial field goals in the Chargers’ 17-14 loss to the New York Jets. He may have lost his NFL job but with that many high-profile misses he may be offered the position of programming director at NBC.

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Rough day for Cowboys fans. And where was Jessica Simpson to blame when they needed her?

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Sad irony with the Indianapolis victory over the Ravens for die-hard Baltimore fans. It’s not just losing their team to another city in the middle of the night, it’s that the team that left, the Colts, just knocked out their replacement.

Sort of how “Late Night with Conan OBrien” fans feel.

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Are we sure NBC wasn’t somehow involved?

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The Saints-Vikings game is scheduled for 640p Eastern time next Sunday. How did they come up with 640p? Apparently it’s when Brett Favre says he will be done with his early bird special.

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For next week the over-under for the Saints-Vikings is 52. Many fans who saw the Saints-Cowboys have to be asking – for the first half?

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And the Saints are currently four point favorites. Of course this could change. There’s a whole week ahead, plenty of time for Brett Favre to consider retirement.

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NBC’s Olympic commercials feature a young woman athlete saying of the Games – “It’s the one pure thing that nothing can affect.” Well, except a French judge. Or maybe being shown at 1000p weeknights.

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Or as my very talented friend Neil Berliner adds, “or Tonya Harding with a crowbar.”

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Back to politics. More of a rant than a joke:

With alll the effort the Democrats having to put into trying to keep Ted Kennedy’s seat you think the Massachusetts state party could have spent a little more time and effort in candidate recruitment, or in talking Vicki into just running to finish out Ted’s term???

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A few thoughts halfway through a playoff weekend.

Posted January 16, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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Being the punter for the New Orleans Saints today was like being the fact checker on Sarah Palin’s speechwriting staff.

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With the lousy performances by both the Ravens and the Cardinals, this was the worst day for bird fans since US Airways hit all those geese.

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Cincinnati Bengals coach Marvin Lewis was named coach of the year. Unfortunately as Bengals fans found out last week, it’s no longer 2009.

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Bristol Palin said in “In Touch” magazine that she considers herself “a born-again virgin.” What’s next, Tiger Woods and John Edwards retaking their marriage vows?
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The Stanford men’s basketball team lost 77-73 to Washington State, despite outscoring the Cougars 47-31 in the second half. Stanford’s Jeremy Green said afterwards “At halftime, coach really got to us; his speech, he really got into it.”

Perhaps next time Coach Dawkins should give that speech before the first half.

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Tiger Woods has apparently entered a rehab clinic for sex addiction. The clinic’s motto? “Just don’t do it.”

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Apparently many people believe that sex addiction would explain Tiger Woods’ reckless behavior with so many women. Of course, that behavior could also be explained by the fact that he’s a rich successful male athlete used to getting anything he wants.

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Slouching towards Saturday…

Posted January 15, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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The New Orleans Saints, known for their high-powered offense, and slightly less high-powered defense, will play the Arizona Cardinals Saturday afternoon. The Cardinals beat the Green Bay Packers 51-45 in what was basically an Arena football style game (with no defense) last week. Stay tuned for the first NFL playoff game where the over-under might be triple digits.

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Heisman runner-up Toby Gerhart has decided he wants to get paid for playing football, and so will forgo his last year of eligibility at Stanford and enter the NFL draft. It was either that or transfer to USC.

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Sources say that whatever happens with his plea bargain, there are “irreconcilable differences” between Gilbert Arenas and the Washington Wizards. Arenas for his part says he took his best shot at it.
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Silly thought for a Friday. Heidi Montag has admitted to having 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day, so that she can feel “comfortable as a woman as a person.” Stay tuned for her next interview, when she will claim “no one appreciates the real me.”

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You have to hand it to NBC. They were losing at both the 10pm and 1135p time shots for comedy. So they basically decided to come up with their own material.

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No one is really happy with the mess at NBC. Okay, maybe except for Dave Letterman, and of course Tiger Woods.

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At this point, rumors are that there is a deal for Conan O’Brien to leave NBC, and presumably the best solution for the network is to keep him off the air. But if so, with a $80 million contract, at worst Conan stands to be the highest paid “American Idle.”

According to McCain advisor Steve Schmidt, Sarah Palin didn’t really understand why there was a North and South Korea. Which is unfortunate, because if she had, they wanted her to explain it to President Bush.

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Monday at the Oracle Arena in Oakland, the Harlem Globetrotters will take on their perennial opponents, the Washington Generals. Oddsmakers give the Generals a slightly better chance of winning than next Saturday’s Warriors opponents – the New Jersey Nets.

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More weaving in and out of a Lane…

Posted January 15, 2010 by left coast sports babe
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So while Lane Kiffin’s dad, Monte, is much respected around the NFL, Lane himself has had a series of short term jobs with results that have been mediocre at best. Yet he keeps finding new high profile positions. This is scary, could it be a long range plan to have Kiffin end up as U.S. President?

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Since he bolted for USC after one scandal-plagued, expensive, mediocre year, Tennessee fans and students are referring to Lane Kiffin as a “whore.” Not true, whores generally provide value for money.

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UCLA offensive coordinator Norm Chow has said he is happy with the Bruins and will not join Lane Kiffin’s staff at USC. Translation, he might as well wait a year until the top Trojan job becomes available when Kiffin leaves to go somewhere else.

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Kiffin himself said of his leaving Tennessee to take the job with USC – “I really believe this is the only place I would have left to go.” If he keeps up with the results he has had in the last three jobs, there may not be ANY place he has left to go.

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Ben Burnett suggests that with his record, the logical place for Kiffin to end up is…Oakland, in a few years Al Davis will have forgotten who he is anyway.

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Gilbert Arenas has been charged with a felony for carrying an unlicensed gun. Prosecutors decided on this charge because there is no law for felony stupidity.

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The New York Mets are reportedly angry at Carlos Beltran for having knee surgery this week without getting a second opinion from their team doctors. The Mets wanted Beltran to consider waiting until the season was over, as in September.

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Carly Fiorina called Barbara Boxer a “failed senator.” Well, if anyone knows about failure it’s the woman who was fired both from Hewlett Packard AND John McCain’s presidential campaign.
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commie pinko time.

Open question to all Republicans who want Harry Reid to resign over his comments on Obama’s skin color and dialect – Who’s going to be the first to decry Rush Limbaugh’s comments that President Obama will use the crisis in Haiti to “boost his credibility with the black community?”

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