Left Coast Sports Babe

A celebrity has been convicted of murder in Los Angeles.  What’s next, Kobe Bryant leading the league in assists?

Dodgers’ fans staying until the eighth inning?

The Clippers becoming respectable?  Okay, let’s not go that far.

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From Jim Barach:  A federal judge says the prosecution’s behavior in the case against former Senator Ted Stevens was the worst he has seen in 25 years. Where was he during the O.J. Simpson murder trial?
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And not like we’re keeping score or anything, but if we were….

The score:  Obama administration  –  three pirates,

Bush-Cheney adminstration –  one lawyer 

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The Mets opened their new Citi Field today.  An impressive looking expensive structure, lots of hype, disappointing results.  Well, at least the Citi name fits.

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This is the first week of the NHL playoffs, or as the Toronto Maple Leafs call it  – spring break.

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Tuesday morning, the Obamas plan to officially introduce Bo, the new First Puppy.  This is the most attention paid to a dog in the White House since…

 – okay, I am not making this tacky of a joke. But if I were the punchline would involve Hillary Clinton or Monica Lewinsky.

Now that Barack and Michelle Obama are heading back from their World Tour…

(In keeping with Michelle’s wishes not to spoil their children, Sasha and Malia will soon be sporting t-shirs that say “My parents went to G-20 and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”)

But here is a piece I wrote last year.  And yes, had John McCain somehow pulled off last year’s election, it could have happened:

Sarah Palin meets the Queen of England.

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“Great to meetcha.  Can I call you Liz?  Are you a hockey mom too?  Polo?
No, my kids don’t swim much.

Swell house.  Yes, I’d love tea. You betcha. You know, we have English
Breakfast Tea at my house.

John has told me that you guys have been such a big help in  Iraq.     
And we just can’t wave the white flag of surrender. I mean, just   
because we are trying to control a country across the ocean that   
doesn’t want us there…   Did I mention that John McCain and I are   
Mavericks?

And I brought you a present.  It’s a wolf I shot that I found on   
your lawn.  I even field dressed it for you.   But, gosh, your   
English wolves have short legs.  A Corgi?  No, what’s that?  Oh,   
terribly sorry Liz.  Say it ain’t so.  Dog-gone.”

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Yes, it could have happened. But it didn’t.  Sometimes we Americans get it right.  Even on American Idol and the Presidential Election.

For starters, look at the playoff picture. If the season ended right now, two teams with records under .500 – the Detroit Pistons and Chicago Bulls – would make the playoffs. Who do they think they are, the NHL?

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And actually, the Toronto Raptors, at 30-45, are still barely in the playoff picture. Fans in Toronto, more accustomed to rooting for the Maple Leafs are wondering “what’s a playoff picture?”

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As Passover approaches, there are a lot more Kosher choices for Jews who want to imbibe over the holiday. Besides a kosher tequila there is now a $200.00 Kosher Cabernet Sauvignon.

So, passing on all the jokes about expensive Jewish wine – (as if, you never buy me any jewellry) can we assume when you pull the cork a little voice says “You have this kind of money to spend on wine but not to visit your mother?

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Michigan State upset Connecticut to earn a spot in the Final Four. But for all those crowing about their upset bracket pick, let me tell you, bragging about picking a 2 seed, is like bragging over having all your money in money market funds. You might be right, but you don’t exactly get points for risk-taking.

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So after all the hype, there is no Big East team in the NCAA men’s basketball finals.  But to be fair, a few of them could have made the playoffs in the NBA’s Eastern conference.

Season ticket sales are down all over Major League Baseball. SF Giants President Larry Baer, after the team’s season ticket sales fell by over 2,000 said “There’s a certain amount of fear driving people to not want to make commitments in March for purchases in September.”

True, but at least the way the Giants have been playing, they won’t be paying anything in October.

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Skip this joke if you aren’t a hockey fan.

This time of year at least there’s a silver lining for Toronto Maple Leafs fans. Unlike fans in San Jose they don’t worry about their team choking in the playoffs.

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Hottest bet in Vegas? Which NFL team will regret their decision first? The Bears to trade for Jay Cutler or the Bills to sign Terrell Owens?

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Billionaire Larry Ellison’s BMW-Oracle team won a court battle allowing them, for now, to be the “challenger of record” in next year’s America’s Cup.

“Who cares?” – said almost everyone in the world.
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In that vein, Penn State won the NIT basketball tournament.

Of course, had college football had a playoff system, Penn State, instead of going to the Rose Bowl, might have been knocked out in an early round. So, maybe count the Nittany Lions as a fan of the BCS system. On the other hand, how many people outside of State College, Pennsylvania, and Waco, Texas (home of Penn State opponent Baylor) watched the NIT final? I am guessing dozens, at least.

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The Republican National Committee replaced Sarah Palin as a fundraising speaker with Newt Gingrich. Because nothing says “family values” like serving your wife with divorce papers when she has cancer. (Yes, he did.)

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Sarah Palin was replaced as a fundraising speaker for the Republican National Committee. Apparenly because she couldn’t commit to the date in advance. But give the gal a break, she’s been busy watching Russians from her house.

Governor Kathleen Sibelius announced she will be paying more tax by refiling her last three years of tax returns. Republicans are privately at all these Democrats who are adjusting their returns.. “They actually pay taxes?”

In a recent poll ,60 percent of baseball fans said in a recent poll that they were not interested in the World Baseball Classic – The other 40 percent said “What’s the World Baseball Classic?.

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Nearly 60 percent of major league baseball fans said in no player who used steroids or performance-enhancing drugs should get into the Hall of Fame.

And about an equal number said they would be more likely to go to games if there were a real home run chase again.
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Allison Iraheta sang “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt, And said, “I grew up listening to this song”

Alison is 16.