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If 48 is old…

June 17, 2009

 Apparently British singing sensation Susan Boyle may appear on “American’s Got Talent.” 

Judge Piers Morgan said she absolutely would appear “If she’s up for it and she is well enough.”   He added, ” She still gets a bit tired sometimes, but she is 48.”

Well, heck, would hate to put an older person under that kind of stress.  Good thing that until August 4, 2009,  Barack Obama is 47.

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For the San Francisco Giants, Tim Lincecum, Matt Cain and Randy Johnson are a combined 21-7.  The rest of the pitching staff are 13 -23.    Which means the team’s slogan could be “Tim, Matt and Randy, then have vodka handy.”

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Sammy Sosa became the latest player whose name was leaked as testing positive for steroids.   In an ESPN poll, two percent of respondents said they were shocked. Didn’t know that many people lived on the North Side of Chicago.

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Actually, Sammy Sosa’s first home run of his career was off Roger Clemens.  So while the purists rewrite the record books, here’s a question – Do two asterisks cancel each other out? 

And if a “clean” hitter had a home run against a juiced pitcher, should it count double?  Ditto should a “clean” pitcher get extra credit for striking out a juiced hitter?    The mind boggles.

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Apparently some company has made a new solar powered vibrator.  Will their motto be “shine and rise?”

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The latest controversy surrounding Nayda Suleman, that the website photographers she is using have not obtained the proper child labor permits.    Yeah, what’s wrong with this picture?  The state requires permits to video the octuplets, but not to have them in the first place.

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British Airways has made a suggestion to employees:  To help the airline through a difficult time, work for up to a month without pay.  Coming soon to a drink cart near you – the flight attendant tip jar.

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In case Sarah Palin’s people are reading this blog….

June 16, 2009

I am happy to apologize for the next joke. Hey, it should boost my ratings.

David Letterman has apologized for the “bad joke” he made about Sarah Palin’s daughter. Wonder how long it will take John McCain to apologize for the bad joke he made in putting Governor Palin a potential heartbeat away from the presidency?

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And while Letterman apologized to Palin for the “knocked-up” joke, how about another apology to all those people out there who are struggling with apparent infertility – like Manny Ramirez?

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The 16-45  Nationals are reportedly planning to fire their manager Manny Acta.  Yep, with a record that bad in Washington you really can’t expect to keep your job. Unless you get re-elected.

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Credit for finding this tidbit goes to  Zev Karlin-Neumann.  It’s so good to know that when the country is facing crises on all fronts, that our top legislative body is focused on the important things.

Maine Republican Senator Olympia Snowe used her time on the Senate floor  “to commend Barkwheats Dog Biscuits,” which are made with “ginger and parsley” to get rid of “doggy breath.” 

No word on if conservative Republicans threatened to filibuster the commendation.

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The city of Los Angeles is trying to raise $900.000 to throw a victory parade for the Lakers after they won the NBA championship.  Well, that’s one budget expense they won’t have to worry about anytime soon in New York.

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Michael Phelps has a new book out titled “How to Train with a T. Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals.”  A somewhat nonsensical title.  Wonder if the sequel will be “How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bong??”

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Beyond the NBA finals.

June 14, 2009

After another disappointing performance in game five, perhaps it’s time for the Orlando Magic to question whether it was the best idea to name themselves after a Mickey Mouse organization?

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The only negative for Lakers fans about tonight’s game.  The realization that until next year’s pre-season starts, they’re done watching their team play. Fortunately that’s only a few weeks away.

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Actually living in Los Angeles without pro basketball?  Now Lakers fans have something in common with Clippers fans.

 

The Iraqi Presidential election is barely over and already there are allegations of the results being rigged and/or counted illegally.  Who says we’re not making progress in exporting U.S. style democracy?

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GM’s latest television ad says “We’re not going out of business. We’re getting down to business.”   One question, if true, wouldn’t it have been smarter to do that BEFORE they ended up in Chapter 11?

 

Connecticut basketball coach Jim Calhoun, 67, is out of the hospital, a day after breaking five ribs when he fell during a 50 mile bike race.  He actually rode the last 16 miles of the race after the fall, but then collapsed.  Maybe it’s time for coach Calhoun to realize he’s not 57 any more?

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Sports sponsorships of the future…?

June 13, 2009

 The College World Series started this weekend, an unmatched display of American amateur baseball talent.  At least until later this month when the Washington Nationals play the  Baltimore Orioles.

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The Phoenix Mercury of the WNBA may have been the first to put a sponsor’s name – Lifelock – on their jerseys, but they probably won’t be the last.

Although one question – Who has less national name recognition, the Phoenix Mercury or Lifelock?

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As to other potential sponsorship deals.  At this point it’s a tough decision, which NFL team will get the offer from Aladdin Bail Bonds?

But how long until the University of Memphis gets an offer from Kaplan?   Kaplan’s marketing promise is “Raise your SAT scores.   Guaranteed.”

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And how long until we get the reverse sponsorship deals?  As in, how long will it take the Los Angeles to pay someone to put anything BUT their city name on jerseys for the  Clppers ?

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Weird trivia department:

The San Francisco Giants honored their 1989 team before their game against the As Saturday night.  And then they started Randy Johnson,  who was in his second big league season in 1989.  (Actually, it was the year the Expos traded the Big Unit to the Mariners.)

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It’s been quite a year for Pittsburgh fans.  First the Steelers win the Super Bowl.  Now the Penguins have won the Stanley Cup.  And the Pirates… well, two out of three ain’t bad.

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Six Flags Amusement Parks filed for chapter 11 today.  Making them perhaps now Seven Flags?  The last one is white.

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Idle thought:  The late-night television news tonight flashed up information on where to call if you have questions the day after the switch to digital.  If you are watching, haven’t you already figured it out?

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Political rant time.

June 12, 2009

Okay, conservative readers of this blog, both of you,  come back tomorrow.

Rant number one.  Okay, Carrie Prejean has been fired from her job as Miss California.  She said it was because of the comment she made about gay marriage. 

Sorry Carrie, I don’t think it’s about the comment you made.  I think it’s about the comments you continued to make, about the press conferences and interviews, and about your joining the National Organization for Marriage and making appearances for them.

Had you made your comment, and then when asked about it, said that was your belief but then gone on to “World Peace” and all the other things beauty queens talk about, or simply said, “I think there’s a lot more to people than their views on this issue and can’t we all get along?” or something like that, then no problem.  Oh sure, there would still be people who were upset and you might get a picket or two, along with some supporting picketers. But the whole thing would have largely faded out of memory for most people.

And then you could have your year of appearances and smiling and waving and doing all the things Miss Californias do.  (Even if I’m not sure exactly what those things are.)

But hey, it’s a free country and you decided to use that comment to become a political activist and speak out and make appearances against gay marriage.  And that’s your right, but it wasn’t your job.

And that, Ms Prejean,  is why you were fired.

 

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And by the way, in the “What was she thinking department?”   In terms of alienating the men in her audience,  making anti-gay statements as a beauty pageant winner is like making those statements at a movie festival featuring Judy Garland.

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Rant number two.

Governor Sarah Palin, refusing to let her new feud with David Letterman die.  Okay, it was a tacky joke, okay he said he didn’t mean it to apply to her underage daughter, Willow. But if it was all about protecting her underage children why did she trot poor Bristol and Levi out last year during the campaign. The girl was just 17?

And if it’s all about education, or explaining why she considered his joke so out of bounds, hey, the Governor could have easily accepted Dave’s invitation to come on his show,  and done a “Top Ten Reasons Why Dave is a Neandrethal,” or something.  Then had a frank discussion on why sexism is dangerous.  But no, she would rather wear the victim crown.  Or rather, like Ms. Prejean, the victim tiara.

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Unreality television

June 12, 2009

A New Jersey mother who appeared  on “Wife Swap” has been charged with wounding her husband by stabbing him.  The woman, who swapped with a tattooed freak show performer, is a former Miss Teen New Jersey .  She claims she stabbed her husband  in self defense when he got jealous of a phone call from a “mutual male friend.”

I’m not sure if stories like this do more to debunk the theory of intelligent design or that of evolution.-

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Minnesota Vikings Coach Brad Childress says to “stay tuned” with the situation with Brett Favre.   “Stay tuned?”  It’s like we’re all watching a ghastly reality show and are unable to change the channel.

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Speaking of unreal –

The Orlando Magic hit 1 of 6 crucial freethrows down the stretch.  It was enough to make their fans miss the clutch foul shooting of  Shaquille O’Neal.

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New beer drinking toast in Green Bay – “May your troubles last as long as Brett Favre’s retirements”

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Cameron Diaz said in an interview that she only wants to date a guy who has “already dealt with his issues.” Is this her way of saying she is becoming a lesbian?

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The University of Alabama must forfeit 21 football wins after an investigation revealed players were obtaining free textbooks to give or sell to other students.   What was the investigators’ first clue?  That the football players were getting textbooks.

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At least this is one scandal that probably won’t hit NCAA basketball teams.  No one expects any of these one-and-done players to even pick up a textbook.

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The one-and-done phenomenon is because high school players have to wait a year before joining the NBA. Thus they may play on a college team for one season, but don’t really become a part of the team or university.  In addition the process is full of academic and monetary scandals. 

Several theories have been advanced to fix the problem, from switching to the baseball model (once you are drafted you must stay in school until your junior year or until you are 21) to a higher NBA age limit,  to requiring underage players to play in a developmental league.  Either that or requiring them to play for the Wizards or Clippers.

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The now former Miss California, Carrie Prejean, was fired by Donald Trump for neglecting her duties.  This is shocking.  Miss California has duties?

Or – a better punchline from the very funny Alex Kaseberg:  Prejean said she didn’t mean to blow off her duties, the wind just blew them away.

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And speaking of funny people, this from Bill Littlejohn:

Rumors have it that Bill Belichick is going to marry long-time companion Linda Holliday.He’s already ordered a tuxedo with a hood on it”

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The endless MLB draft

June 11, 2009

Sarah Palin angrily demanded David Letterman apologize for what she feels was an inappropriate joke aimed at her daughter, Bristol.  Said the Alaska governor, no one should exploit my children, except me.

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Has anyone noticed that Brett Favre has the same relationship to retirement as Elizabeth Taylor has with marriage?

 

Not saying the Major League Baseball draft goes on forever, but even Joe Biden is saying “Enough already.”

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They asked former president and former Rangers owner George W. Bush his opinion on the draft.  Bush said he didn’t know much as he had spent the week at a reunion of the Texas Air National Guard

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President Obama may send former Vice President Al Gore to negotiate with North Korea for the release of the two American journallsts. Wouldn’t it more effective to send Joe Biden to just discuss it with them for as long as it takes….
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Manny Ramirez doesn’t want to discuss his 50 game suspension,  saying “I  didn’t kill nobody, I didn’t rape nobody, so that’s it, I’m just going to come and play the game.,” 

So much for Manny ever needing to leave tickets for O.J. Simpson or Kobe Bryant.

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Sammy Sosa is going to officially announce his retirement from baseball.  Which will surprise both people who thought he might come back.

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or

Sammy Sosa is going to officially announced his retirement from baseball.  Or as a spokesman said “Put a cork in his bats, he’s done.’

(Remember those innocent days when corked bats were cheating?)

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A false prophet

June 9, 2009

So Jon Voight is calling Obama a false prophet.  Hey Jon, “24” ended last month.  Next up, Kiefer Sutherland calling for an overall of the FBI.

 

A court threw out a lawsuit by a San Diego woman alleging fraud because she just found out Cap’n Crunch Crunchberries weren’t a real fruit. She had previously sued after she discovered there was no real fruit in Froot Loops. Think she would have had a better chance if she sued on the premise that eating too much sugared cereal rots your brain.

 

Congrats to Stanford closer Drew Storen, chosen as the number 10 pick in the MLB draft by the Washington Nationals. Even though these days being a closer for the Nationals is kind of like being a wedding planner for Trekkies.

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Manny Ramirez  said he isn’t going to talk about what led to his suspension because “it’s in the past.”  Yeah, that line worked so well for Mark McGwire.

And in the  You-can’t-make-this-stuff-up department,  Ramirez added that he didn’t want “to be a distraction for this team.”

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The Major League Baseball draft continues Wednesday and Thursday.  MLB’s draft never receives as much attention as the NBA and NFL draft, partly because it goes on forever, and for the most part it features players most Americans have never heard of… Sort of like the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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Is anyone running Alaska?

June 8, 2009

Governor Sarah Palin is making San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom look like a homebody.

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Actually with all Sarah’s travel should we  as Americans be worried about Russia?  Because Governor Palin isn’t in her house enough these days to watch them.

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Governor Sarah Palin is travelling around the country claiming that  President Obama is  wasting taxpayer dollars with his expensive ideas. And this from a woman who went to New York and attended a Yankees game?

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Laura Bush says that her husband feels he owes some courtesy to the new President,  and thus won’t try to do or say anything to embarrass  Barack Obama. Besides,  Joe Biden is doing such a good job of it.
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As the NBA playoffs finally creep to a close, who knew that the Lakers might someday be known as the “Boys of Summer?”
 
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Rookie Marlins pitcher Sean West nearly no-hit the Giants Monday night. But really, isn’t no-hitting San Francisco’s lineup this year like winning a hot-dog eating contest with super models?
 
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The Minnesota Vikings have apparently issued an ultimatum to Brett Favre to make up his mind.  Actually Favre is great at making up his mind.  And then remaking it, and remaking it, and remaking it…
 
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Randy Johnson, 45, agreed to pitch on 3 days rest today for the San Francisco Giants against the Marlins.  Which no doubt was an act of valor designed to help the team.  And I am sure there was no chance that the fact he feels betrayed by Arizona management had nothing to do with it. 
 
 Because had the Big Unit taken his normal rest and pitched in Phoenix, it would have been a huge draw for the Diamondbacks, as no doubt thousands of fans would have bought last minute tickets and showed up to cheer their former pitcher for his first start after his 300th win.   Thousands more than would pay to see Cain,  Zito or Sanchez.     Nah, I’m sure that didn’t enter into his mind at all…

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We don’t need no stinking SATs

June 7, 2009

The University of Memphis said that their internal investigation showed no evidence of illegalities regarding their basketball players and SAT tests. They also told the NCAA they were eager to have the investigation wrapped up so their investigators could get back to their other job of helping O.J. find the real killers.

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The new Cowboys Stadium opened with a country music concert.  Let’s see, country songs are often about broken hearts,  drinking, cheating and trouble.   Yep, seems perfect for the Dallas Cowboys.

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Will Ferrell’s “Land of the Lost” had a disappointing opening at the box office.   Wonder how many people figured it was a documentary about the U.S. auto industry.

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Four buyers have emerged to try to keep the financially struggling NHL Phoenix Coyotes in Arizona.  Their first job, if they succeed, is to have more than four people buy Coyote season tickets.

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On ABC’s “This week”  Hillary Clinton indicated that she had originally not wanted to accept the Secretary of State job from President Obama.  But she changed her mind, some time after Barack told her that, unfortunately,  unlike being president there really wasn’t much of a role for a cabinet member’s spouse.

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And Hillary Clinton also said she had changed her mind about Obama’s readiness for that 3am phone call.  Even if when she calls at that time  Barack doesn’t usually know where Bill is either.

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Octomom Nayda Suleman will not divulge the name of her children’s biological father, but indicates that he would be upset that she used the sperm to have so many children.  Well, we may not know who he is, but that does eliminate Travis Henry.

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Los Angeles has been awarded the 2011 NBA All-Star game.   Apparently David Stern felt the Staples Center doesn’t get enough high-profile games and publicity. 

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Actually, the Staples Center has the most experience hosting meaningless relaxed exhibition games. The Clippers have meaningless down pat, and the Lakers treat much of the season like a relaxed exhibition.

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We’ve all changed our minds..

June 5, 2009

Brett Favre’s agent, Bus Cook, says of the currently-retired-at-this-moment quarterback  “We’ve all changed our minds, I guess.”

Isn’t this like someone saying of Bill Clinton ‘We’ve all lusted in our hearts?”

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Definition of eternity.  Joe Biden trying to compress his thoughts into a 140 character Twitter.

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The San Francisco Giants are celebrating Randy Johnson’s 300th win.  Even though out of that 300 win total, he has more wins against the Giants than with them.

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this one from Bill Littlejohn:  A doctor says that Lamar Odom‘s inconsistency in the playoffs is due to a large amount of candy consumption that leads to highs and crashes.So, when Lamar is on the court, I guess the Lakers go into a Twinkie Defense”

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Mine that Bird is being hyped as a great Canadian horse because he raced as a two year old in  Toronto despite being born in Kentucky.    Maybe it’s payback for the “American” teams – Pittsburgh and Detroit-  fighting for the Stanley Cup.  (Since most of them were born in Canada, and Europe.)

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President Obama opened his speech in Cairo with a greeting in coherent Arabic.   Much of the Muslim world was shocked.  “Tell us about it”, said all the Americans who are still getting used to our President opening a speech in coherent English.

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While Obama’s away…

June 4, 2009

Some are worried that with President Obama away in the Mideast, that Vice President Biden could get into trouble.  Not to worry,  Barack has simply given Joe an assignment to keep him busy – figure out how to Twitter.

(and if that joke makes no sense – Twitter requires that you get your thoughts down to 140 characters, maximum.)

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Lebron James has been fined $25,000 for skipping the media press conference after the Cavaliers’ loss to Orlando.    Barry Bonds was especially unhappy to hear it, he now figures for a few million a year he could have skipped all of them.

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Actually, if David Stern wants to really benefit the NBA maybe he shouldn’t fine Lebron for staying away from press conferences.  Maybe he should pay Mark Cuban to stay away from them.

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The Lakers team showed up tonight.  Unfortunately the Orlando team that showed up was more like Dopey, Sleepy and Grumpy.

Randy Johnson got his 300th win today in Washington against the Nationals.  With these historic events, over the year the people who will  claim  they were there will grow exponentially.  Why, twenty years from now over 200 people will say they were in the stadium.

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No wonder Randy felt so comfortable going for his 300th.  The crowd reminded him of his days with the Expos.

 

Randy Johnson once killed a bird by accidentally hitting him with a pitch. Awful luck. If he had only been hit by Jamie Moyer,  the bird would be telling the story to his grandchildren.

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To 300 and beyond – Randy Johnson

June 4, 2009

 Randy Johnson was planning to pitch for his 300th win Wednesday night against the Washington Nationals.  Before the game was finally postponed,  officials considered starting the game as late as 1130p.  Considering the Nationals’ league worst attendance, such a game might have been apt  – 300 wins, 300 fans.

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Johnson’s next chance for his 300th win is scheduled now for Thursday afternoon, in an unplanned  make-up game.  The expected miniscule crowd might be appropriate, after all, the Big Unit did start out with the Montreal Expos.

 

 

People paid $1000 to hear Joe Biden speak at a fundraiser.    Which in these times is quite a value –   That’s less than a penny a word.

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Alex Kaseberg’s take on the same subject….

In New York, Vice President Joe Biden gave a speech at a $1,000-a-plate fundraiser dinner. That’s nothing, people paid $10,000-a-plate to attend the “Joe Biden Will Not Speak” fundraiser dinner.

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President Obama is in the Mideast, but he left the dog behind.  Following  the precedent Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has been doing with Bill.

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Variation on an old joke.

The University of Memphis said their own internal investigation and found no proof that a player, thought to be Derrick Rose, had a stand-in take the SAT for him.  Apparently the investigation went like this – “Derrick, did you take the SAT?   “Why is there one missing?”

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The University of Memphis said their own internal investigation found no proof that a player cheated on the SAT.  Were these the same investigators who last year told John McCain to say “the fundamentals of our economy are strong?”

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500 strikeouts in Washington…

June 3, 2009

 

Tim Lincecum got his 500th strikeout Tuesday night.  Which is amazing.  He’s only 24 years old.  And he hasn’t been able to pitch against the Giants lineup.

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The last time there were 500 strikeouts in Washington, it was a Star Trek convention looking for dates to the final dinner..

 

The NBA finals are finally starting on Thursday.  The League’s goal is to have them finished in time for the 2009-10 preseason.

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The Obama puppy, Bo, chomped on a reporter’s microphone.  The President apologized profusely and said the dog made a mistake; they were training him to take the mike from Biden.

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Will Ferrell’s “Land of the Lost”  is opening Friday.    But I’m just not sure how interested Californians will be in a documentary on the Republican party..
 
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In the next issue of Rolling Stone,  American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert will apparently admit he is gay.  This will come as quite a shock to both people who are just getting over the discovery that Clay Aiken is gay.

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So now Americans have been told they will have to see their tax dollars continue to subsidize an aging relic from a past generation.  But the public financing from John McCain’s campaign is almost paid off.  It’s this GM thing that is troubling.. 

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Carly Fiorina wants to be a California senator, but she has only voted in about 20 percent of elections since she registered to vote in the State in 2000. Meg Whitman wants to be governor, but has voted in less than half the elections since she registered in 2002.

Don’t they understand?  You don’t miss votes until you get elected and then you start campaigning for your next office.

 

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The Ohio State Buckeyes were eliminated in the NCAA baseball regionals with back to back losses  – 24-8 to Georgia and 37-6 to Florida State.  (No, those aren’t typos.)   Only smiles around baseball diamonds in Columbus have to be on the faces of potential walk-on pitchers.

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Michelle and Barack’s Date Night

June 1, 2009

President Obama has been criticized for taking his wife to New York City for a dinner and Broadway show.  But come on,  Barack didn’t do anything ridiculously extravgant, like taking Michelle to a Yankees game.

 

Randy Johnson will be going for his 300th win when he takes the mound against the Washington Nationals.  Which is an incredible accomplishment.  300 wins.. as of today that’s three more than the Nationals.   (True, on June 1 in their fifth year, Washington only has 297 wins.) 

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Jamie Moyer, 46, just got his 250th win.  So means he too could end up with 300 wins,  maybe if he only pitches until 50.  Which curiously enough is now the speed of his fastball.

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The Octomom has signed a contract for a reality show.    Which might be the first time Nayda Sulelman and reality have been used in the same sentence.

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The Octomom has signed a contract  for a reality show.   But isn’t Nadya Suleman hosting a reality show like George W. Bush hosting “Are you smarter than a fifth grader?”

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Some worry that President Obama’s Supreme Court pick Sonia Sotomayor is such a champion of the underdog, that she will never be able to make a decision in favor of the rich and privileged.   How can they worry?  The woman is a Yankees fan.

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Manny and the Octomom

June 1, 2009

So first there’s “Jon and Kate Plus Eight,”, then there’s the Octomom, now there’s Manny Ramirez.  Remember the good old days when the most hype we had about prescription drugs was Viagra commercials.

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Manny Ramirez is now only about a month away from returning from his suspension for being caught with the fertility drug HCG in his system.  The Dodgers are eagerly awaiting his return, and apparently Joe Torre has personally volunteered to host the baby shower.

 

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In the NCAA baseball regionals,  The University of Texas beat Boston College 3-2 in 25 innings.  Yes, 25 innings.  Fans showed up for a baseball game, and a cricket match broke out.

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When the interminable NBA playoffs are over, the teams in the finals will have played over 100 games.  And the Lakers have shown up for at least ten of them.

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Nadya Suleman will apparently star with her fourteen children in a reality television show to be aired only in Britain.  Which is shocking really, there is a reality show that even Americans find too distasteful?

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Working titles for the show?

Fourteen’s Company?

Eight is not enough?

Unmarried..with Children?

Are you smarter than a Fertility Doctor?

Whatever they call it, perhaps they could borrow a classic television song….as in starting out “She’s  creepy and she’s  kooky…”

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The show’s viewers?  Presumably those who want something less intellectually challenging than “Jon and Kate plus eight.”

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President Obama and Michelle went on a “date night” up to New York.  Former President Bush said it sounded like a nice idea, and former President Clinton said “you can date your wife?”

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Some fans worry that since the Cleveland Cavaliers disappointedly lost in the NBA semi-finals, that Lebron James will want out of town.   Well, the Cavs could always trade him to the Clippers, where at least he won’t have to worry about playoff losses.

 

from Bill Littlejohn

Close to 200 prisoners will cycle around France next month in their own Tour de France.  .For the REAL Tour de France participants–finally someone to set a good example”

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True questions from Hawaii…

May 31, 2009

Under the “you can’t make this stuff up” category, today’s post is actual questions asked by tourists in Hawaii.  Or potential tourists to me, their travel agent.

And no,  I am not making any of this up.

 

Can you use U.S. money in Hawaii?

(and the corollary   – do you need a passport to go to Hawaii?”)

And once there…

To hotel staff : Do you live on the island?  And “So where do you get electricity?”

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Is there water on the other side of the island?

 

Can you swim under the island?

 

And my favoite” – “How do you keep the islands from floating apart?”

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Meltdowns

May 29, 2009

Carlos Zambrano was suspended for six games following his recent meltdown.  Which was shocking, since Cubs’ fans are not normally used to meltdowns before September.

 

Embattled Senator Roland Burris of Illinois now says that his conversations about fundraising and the Senate seat prove his innocence.  Right, like Manny Ramirez’s suspension proves that Major League Baseball had a real drug policy.

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Many sports fans across the United States are rooting for the Cavaliers to win the NBA championship, because the city of Cleveland has not won a major sports championshp since 1964.  Or as Cubs’ fans say,  ” only yesterday.”

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Commie pinko alert.

 

At this point it seems like President Obama’s first Supreme Court nominee will sail through the nomination process.    And if not, it will at least be interesting to see people compare her to Clarence Thomas.

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Cheaters and other jokes

May 27, 2009

The University of Memphis is under investigation for “major” rule violations, including “knowing fraudulence or misconduct” on the SAT exam by a player on their 2007-2008, team.  Apparently the NCAA became really suspicious when the unnamed player involved said  “What’s an SAT?”

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Manny Ramirez is rehabbing during his 50 game suspension with a minor league team.  In the best interests of baseball, some are asking that the rehab be with the Nationals.

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Randy Johnson got his 299th win on Wednesday night.   He will go for win 300 next Wednesday.  Which means another  potential milestone  with  an asterisk  – next Wednesday the Giants are playing the Nationals.

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From the very funny Alex Kaseberg.  Very tacky.  Wish I had written it:

The latest rumor is that Alex Rodriguez was making out in a New York club with Kate Hudson. It looks like A-Rod is trying to pull a Capt “Sully” Sullenberger: get lucky and land on the Hudson.

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The Blue Jays lost their ninth game in a row.  Which is making this one of the worst months of May ever in Toronto.   Although to be fair, the Maple Leafs seldom play in May.

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Wednesday night was the season premier of  “Wipeout.”    And not just the Nuggets’ fourth quarter in Los Angeles.

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First he talked about how he and Bristol basically lived together at her mother Sarah’s  house.  Now Levi Johnston has said in an interview that Bristol Palin’s father, Todd, repeatedly offered her a car if she would break up with him.   Proving once again, if you are going to throw someone under the bus, you had better have puncture-proof tires.

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Judges and puppets and other craziness..

May 27, 2009

Nike clearly hopes for a Lakers- Cavaliers NBA final, and in fact already has a commercial featuring Kobe and Lebron puppets.

If the Nuggets and Magic end  up in the finals instead, will they be known as the “Put a sock in them” puppets?

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For anyone who thinks President Obama’s first pick for a Supreme Court Justice is unqualified, two words:  Harriet Miers.

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Dick Cheney has already come out against Barack Obama’s Supreme Court pick.   And former President Bush is still giggling trying to say “Sonia Sotomayor” three times real fast.
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Dahntay Jones was assessed a flagrant foul after the league reviewed game tape that showed him tripping Kobe Bryant.   This could lead to a suspension if he does it again, along with the undying appreciation of most NBA fans outside of Los Angeles.

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Zack Greinke is now 8-1 for the Kansas City Royals.  It’s not that the Royals aren’t used to eight wins in May. But usually it’s the team effort.

 

Sonia Sotomayor, the first Latina nominee to the Supreme Court, is a New Yorker of Puerto Rican descent.   Republicans, casting at any straws in hopes of derailing her nomination, are wondering if there is a history of her ruling in Sharks v. Jets.

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Judge Sotomayor issued the injunction that ended the baseball strike of 1994-1995, which brought major league baseball back after 232 days.  Although the timing of her decision may have contributed to the demise of the Montreal Expos, and their eventually becoming the Washington Nationals.  Despite this,  fans in D.C.  still largely support her.

 

Some credit Sotomayor with saving major league baseball.  As opposed to all those balls that suddenly started flying out of ballparks after the strike for no officially discernable reason.

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