Left Coast Sports Babe

That moment when you realize,  whoever wins, your most successful March Madness effort is going to be a 1:00am Cat Bracket. #Villanova   #Wildcats

Congrats to Houston Rockets for securing #1 seed & home-field advantage throughout playoffs. If they want to stay out all night celebrating before tomorrow’s game w/ San Antonio, Spurs will no doubt chip in for bar bill.

I guess God wanted Sister Jean to be able to focus on Easter. #marchmadness

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Ready for someone on #SFGiants besides Joe Panik to get an RBI.

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So if Amazon really WERE evading taxes , by Trump standards wouldn’t that make them “really smart?”

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So on the holiest weekend in the Christian calendar, @realDonaldTrump is celebrating by going after Amazon and Jerry Brown. #JesusWept

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Well, we all know why Trump really attacked Jerry Brown – He’s jealous of the California governor’s budget surplus, approval ratings, and hand size.

$521 million Mega Millions winning ticket sold in New Jersey last night. Assume winner’s first plan with all that money – get out of New Jersey.

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My generation sadly misses the Sears Roebuck Christmas catalog. Now millennials will have the experience of missing Toys R Us.

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Ted Nugent just said the Parkland survivors have “no soul.” Many fine people….

My friend Ezra asked if this meant Nugent was “hollow inside.”  Uh, hollower than a Dollar Store Easter Chocolate bunny…

Until tonight, no MLB team had won back-to-back 1-0 games w/ same player hitting home run in each. Ever. But hey, we all knew if it would happen it would be the SF Giants’ Joe Panik against Dodgers.

#GroundhogDay. Panik for only HR of the game, Strickland for the save. Just like we all expected.   As we expected Panik to be on pace for 162 home runs.

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Mickey Lolich was in a wheelchair as Detroit #Tigers honored him on 50th anniversary of 1968 World Series. And even so Lolich probably would have pitched better today than Tigers’ bullpen.

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Kevin Durant says he’s getting additional T’s & ejections due to wanting to repeat last year “What we did as a team was special & and I want to experience that again.”

So if the Warriors were .500 this year KD would be acting like Tim Duncan?

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Somehow I have missed all these conservatives who now love Roseanne explaining how that crotch grab during national anthem was just her free speech.

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Whatever you think of David Hogg, he has a lot more cojones than any Republican in Congress.

Let’s be real here, advertisers not leaving Laura Ingraham show because they’re liberal or snowflakes. They’re leaving because they think staying will cost them $$$, meaning they think most Americans support David Hogg.

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EPA Head Scott Pruitt reportedly rented room on Capitol Hill from a health care lobbyist who is married to an energy lobbyist- for $50 a night! But wait – he didn’t stay at Trump hotel? Move him up in Trump firing bingo!

Teachers in 4 states are striking or threatening to strike for better wages and benefits. Does the GOP still want them to be armed?

I’m old enough to remember when not wanting to be shot at school wasn’t considered to be a political opinion.

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As much as I hate to see Trump spend so much time on the golf course, it might keep him from doing even more dangerous things.

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Trump has declared April “sexual assault awareness” month So his latest campaign is to put @TheOnion out of business?

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Laura Ingraham has announced she is taking a “vacation.” Well, the job of White House Communications Director is open.

From Marc Ragovin  “Claiming executive overreach, Ryan Zinke has announced that he plans to reduce the dimensions of Yankee Stadium’s Monument Park by 71%”

The final spring training game  between  the Angels and Dodgers ended in the fifth inning because of a foul-smelling sewage leak onto the field.  Some punchlines just write themselves.

KC catcher Salvador Perez will be out at least a month after reportedly spraining his MCL carrying a suitcase up stairs at his house. Was Perez returning from washing his truck?

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LiAngelo Ball is declaring himself for the 2018 NBA draft. And who wouldn’t want a middling talent with a shoplifting record AND an interfering dad from hell? #WTF?

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Yes, we know corporate America can be pigs. But when TransUnion only gets your email because email because of a data breach…and then they try to sell you something….. Bigliest pigs.

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So if 2020 #Census can ask if you’re a citizen, can it also ask if you own a gun?

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Reports that Israeli PM Nethanyahu rushed to hospital with “a very high fever.” Hope he hasn’t had tea with any Russians lately.

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In recent CNN poll had 21% believe Trump’s denials of affairs. But guessing that 21% believe every woman who accused Bill Clinton

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Congrats to all those who had David Shulkin in Trump firing bingo!

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Stormy Daniels’ lawyer “We don’t have a dress.” So time to open the pool on what they DO have?

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Has someone told @realDonaldTrump this is not Presidential Apprentice – you don’t need to fire someone EVERY week?

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When Trump finally decides he wants a younger wife will he tell Melania he is divorcing her by tweet?

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So since Ronny Jackson can say with a straight face that Trump weighs 239 pounds I am sure he will declare all the VA problems over by April.

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Oklahoma Senate decided to hike some taxes to raise salaries for teachers, who were about to go on strike because they are some of lowest paid in US. Maybe they didn’t like the idea of angry teachers bearing arms?

Matt Harvey says the Mets will “shock a lot of people” this season. Is there an electrical  wiring issue at Citifield we don’t know about?”

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Miami Marlins – 300 to 1 to win the World Series.  “So you are saying there’s a chance…?”

But hey, if the Yankees win the WS with Stanton do the Marlins get a playoff share?

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So was last night’s OT between Kansas and Duke the highest rated in NCAA history? #SixtyMinutes 

For years Facebook has been saying “Help keep your account safe, please provide your phone number.”. Now feeling extra glad my response was NFW.

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Police now say the Maryland high school shooter fatally shot himself in the head. So this time it was a bad guy with a gun stopping himself with the gun.

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So many Americans love to hate Grayson Allen & Duke; really would have been fun to have #MarchMadness final between Sister Jean’s Ramblers & Blue Devils. #GoodvsEvil…

As badly behaved as Bill Clinton could be remember he also had many friends including women who stuck up for him. With @realDonaldTrump – crickets.

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Maybe @realDonaldTrump should have thought about getting into a battle with a professional who screws other people for a living. #StormyDaniels

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Waiting for someone in GOP to claim that Trump’s affair problems are all a result of US legalization of gay marriage.

RIP #LindaBrown. No doubt given stats on voting & education GOP would prefer to overturn Brown v. Board of Education right after they take care of Roe v. Wade.

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Not that Facebook hasn’t apparently done some scuzzy stuff, some really scuzzy stuff.   But who really thought they had any kind of privacy with what they posted?

As in, DID YOU NOT WATCH “THE SOCIAL NETWORK?”

I’m a luddite, but if only there were a generation of people really good at social media… Might be tempted to advise them to make fake Facebook posts referencing illegal acquaintances to send ICE on bigliest wild goose chases ever….

Robert Kraft used his team’s private jet to fly the Parkland survivors and their families to #MarchForOurLives.   Now on top of everything else I have to say something nice about the Patriots?

But well played New England, well played.

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Grayson Allen’s shot rimmed out and kept Duke from heading to San Antonio for the Final Four. Why do I think Gregg Popovich will make sure there’s not much chance Allen will be heading to San Antonio next year to play for the Spurs?

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#Michigan over #FSU 58 to 54. Many casual fans are thinking “I didn’t know bowl games were played in March.”

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Patriots safety Duron Harmon arrested Costa Rica Friday for trying to bring marijuana into the country, along with THC candy and marijuana oil.. Uh, Harmon couldn’t have just gone to Jamaica? #cantfixstupid

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Expecting teenagers to seriously change the political dynamic in USA is like expecting Loyola-Chicago & Michigan to end up in Final Four. #MarchMadness#MarchforourLives

Difference between Donald Trump and his porn star lover – at least when Stormy Daniels screws people she gives them value for their money.

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That moment when a porn star has the moral high ground over the President of the United States. #StormyDaniels

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Apparently when @realDonaldTrump returns to DC, Melania will stay at Mar-A-Lago through Spring Break. Assume she’s trying to figure how to say Spring Break lasts until the 1st day of summer.

If you say that @realDonaldTrump’s cheating is a non-issue between him & Melania then I sure as hell hope you didn’t condemn @HillaryClinton for staying in her marriage.

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Rick Santorum said students should learn CPR instead of protesting against gun violence. Again showing the intelligence & sensitivity that caused him to lose his Senate seat by 18 points.

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No wonder @realDonaldTrump left town this weekend. Since he’s still sensitive about his inaugural, it would have upset him to see what a real DC crowd looked like. #MarchForOurLives

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WTF is this crap that liberals & “the left” are “using” these young people? This is THEIR #MarchForOurLives Many of us grownups are just watching in awe.

John Kasich today on #MarchForOurLives “people should be held absolutely accountable at the ballot box.” So where’s pool for date Ohio Gov. announces he’s primarying Trump?

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Only 46.1% of eligible voters under 30 voted in the 2016 election.#MarchForOurLives #MarchToThePolls

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Neil Young on Trump “He has no balls. He hasn’t got one ball. All the bravado, all the you’re fired, you’re fired, all that s—, he doesn’t have the balls to look anybody in the face & tell them anything.” “Neil Young overrated” tweet in 3.2.1?

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Finally… last but not least… “No one would know your names” if your classmates hadn’t died…. We wouldn’t know the names of many heroes if not for tragedies. Tragedies often create heroes. And the NRA can go f*ck themselves.

Madison Bumgarner should have taken the day off to ride his dirt bike. 

Number one googled question today with SFGiants fans. “How long does a fractured hand take to heal?”

Every year MLB has a Rookie of the Year, usually someone unexpected. This year it might as well be a SFGiants starting pitcher, right?

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First Shark, then Madbum. Thinking about now SF Giants coach  Bruce Bochy might be calling Spurs coach  Gregg Popovich to see how “smoke and mirrors” coaching style works.

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ESPN reseeded brackets after all 1st weekend upsets. 13-14-15-16 were Florida State-Michigan-Loyola Chicago & Kansas State.
Maybe they should have quit while they were behind.

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Apparently Kentucky players didn’t shake hands with Kansas State after their Sweet 16 loss. I’m sure it was just an oversight by classy coach John Calipari..

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Democrats OFFERED Trump money for his wall in exchange for a path to citizenship for 1.8 million DACA immigrants. S  o again today – lies, damn lies, and Trumpisms.

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WSJ said Trump signed spending bill because aides warned him he’d be blamed for government shutdown while he flew off to Mar-A-Lago.    So US government stays open because POTUS wanted to golf? #whatacountry

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Trump to Congress while signing spending bill – “I will never sign another bill like this again.” So does he expect to resign or be impeached?

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How petty for Trump to announce Friday night executive order banning transgenders from serving in military. When it would be easy for transgender cowards to claim bone spurs.

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Only thing that will make @realDonaldTrump more unhappy than thought of kids in #MarchForOurLives voting is that march crowd will be bigger than his inaugural.

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A rumor that Trump was going to fire HUD secretary Ben Carson Thursday.   Did he hold off because he couldn’t find anyone else to take job, or is he waiting for Stormy Daniels interview?

From TC,  “If teachers are to be armed, will librarians have silencers?

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And seriously, so while NRA crows about “good guy with a gun” after shooting at Great Mills high school,  Jaelynn Willey, 16, died when her parents took her off life support.

#Marchforourlives

Been a rough week already, still have to smile seeing Sister Jean  win and John Calipari lose.

Good to see Kansas State move on. But would have been fun coming up with Good vs . Evil punchlines with Sister Jean matched up against Calipari.

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Because we all tune into March Madness games to see referees call fouls?
Good thing Kansas State vs. Kentucky didn’t go into overtime. They might have had to play the ball boys.

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Wow. Michigan over TAMU in a rout, over a 20 point lead after first half. Normally when Texans are this embarrassed in basketball the Mavericks are involved.

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Frank Gore, 35, just signed a one-year contract with Dolphins. Makes sense, Gore IS a Miami native. And for dinners he’s looking forward to all those “Early-Bird specials.”

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Wonder if Captain Edward J. Smith thought of firing some of his crew for distraction after the Titanic hit the iceberg.

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A provision in new spending bill would make minor league baseball players exempt employees who could be paid as little as $1,000 a month. Average MLB salary is over $4 million a year.
And some can’t imagine why players would risk a suspension and their health to use PEDs.

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RIP Frank Avruch, 89, who was “Bozo the Clown” on TV. Wonder where they’re going to find a coffin big enough for those shoes.

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Zuckerberg “I’m really sorry this happened.” The data breach? Or that Facebook got caught.

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Waiting for EPA Secretary Scott Pruitt to say his wife told him to fly first class.

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Would love to be a fly on the wall listening to a dinner table conversation between Melania Trump & Candy (Mrs. Ben) Carson about now.

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John Dowd “”I love the president and wish him very well.” Is that lawyer-speak for “Bless his heart?”

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So who will spring for Pay-Per-View rights for the fight between Trump and Biden?

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So @realdonaldTrump would confront an armed killer, and take down Joe Biden, but he’s afraid of a porn star…. #WTF?

Remember when Hillary haters said they could never respect a woman who stayed with a husband who humiliated her with repeat affairs. If not, no worries – guess the GOP doesn’t either.

Karen McDougal “I thought I was the only one, I did. I thought I was the only one.”
Latest Trump reality show – “Men who cheat on their mistresses.”

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So if China tariffs and subsequent market tanking are Trump’s response to Mueller getting closer, what’s POTUS going to do when the investigation actually starts issuing more indictments?

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To all those who have been saying, “Cheer up, it could be worse,” Trump now gives us John Bolton as NSA. It just got worse.

All these expert predictions for Sweet Sixteen. Because they did so well for the opening weekend of March Madness?

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Duke has suddenly become a media hot-pick in the tournament.  Blue Devils fans have to hope that doesn’t mean the Blue Devils are about to be bounced in the next round.

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NFL going to change the language of catch-rule, so Steelers’ late go-ahead TD in week 15 against New England would have counted. Guess league will just have to find another way to help the Patriots.

Still 3 weeks left in NBA regular season, but apparently @Spurs did not take kindly to all stories last week about them missing playoffs for 1st time in 21 years.

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United now selling Priority Boarding for Group 2, “Priority boarding lets you avoid the lines and get to your seat sooner.”
Uh, has anyone actually seen the Group 2 lines lately

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Texas bomber was a conservative young white man who was against homosexuality and abortion. So move along, no terrorism to see here…

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So Marco Rubio is upset about story of Trump congratulating Putin, because he thinks the LEAKER is “dangerous.” But the guy sitting in the Oval Office is just fine?

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Joe Biden said he would have ‘beat the hell out’ of Trump in high school for disrespecting women. Like Joe beat the hell out of Clarence Thomas?

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Since Trump isn’t worried about shooting someone on 5th Ave but is worried about his mistresses talking, can only assume problem isn’t potential crime, but embarrassment. #Smallhands

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Just three of Trump’s morning typos “Special Council is told to find crimes wether crimes exist or not. I was opposed to the the selection.”
I guess grammar has a liberal bias.

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Well, at least we don’t have to hear those ridiculous rumors about #MarkZuckerberg running for President in 2020 anymore.

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As the Facebook scandal grows, maybe it’s time to rethink idea that future tech leaders can concentrate on STEM & don’t need liberal arts courses like history, literature, philosophy, ethics….

So while Congress tries to avert another government shutdown, a provision in the spending bill could exempt Minor League Baseball from federal labor laws, thus derailing a multi-year lawsuit which aims to get at least least MINIMUM wage for minor league players.
Because billionaire and millionaire baseball owners didn’t get a big enough tax cut? #WTF?

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Vince McMahon says his new XFL league will start in 2020. Meanwhile, Charlie Ebersol’s “Alliance of American Football” league will start with a 10 week season starting Feb. 9, 2019, the week after the Super Bowl.
Right, because what we really need with falling NFL ratings & CTE issues is MORE football.

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As we lament the sad state of #Pac12 sports, important to remember conference still has 4 teams in #SweetSixteen. In women’s basketball. #MarchMadness #YouGoGirls

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“How many deaths will it take till he knows, that too many people have died…?” And Bob Dylan wrote “Blowin’ in the Wind” before the NRA became a terrorist organization.

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Watching “Stormtracker” in SF Bay Area with less than an inch of rain in most places and thinking this is why the rest of the country hates California.

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NSA advisors wrote ‘DO NOT CONGRATULATE” on Trump’s briefing material before his call with Putin. Silly advisors. They should have said “Obama would congratulate him on election win.”

Trump thinks commercials showing dangers of drugs will turn people off of using them. Right, like showing murders on TV shows turns them off using guns.

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It isn’t about Trump cheating on Melania. That’s their business. It’s intimidating his ex lovers, possibly using campaign funds to pay them off, and hypocritically legislating morality for other Americans. That’s OUR business.

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Melania Trump on cyberbullying “I have been criticized by many for my commitment to tackling this issue, and I know that will continue.”
Including by her husband?

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If there was a chance in hell the Austin bomber, who is targeting minorities, was Latino or Muslim we’d be hearing from @RealDonaldTrump & @FoxNews nonstop about walls and immigration bans.

So this was the Monday when most people’s stupidest St. Patrick Day exploits were probably less embarrassing to recount than their March Madness bracket picks.

No one really likes to see a baseball star get hurt, even a Dodger.
So Giants fans hope Justin Turner’s broken wrist heals, but that he doesn’t rush it and takes at least first 31 games of MLB season off.
In the 1st 31 games LA plays SF 10 times.

It was 59-52 Spurs over Warriors with 3 min left in 3rd. Were we watching NBA playoff teams or two teams vying for Sweet Sixteen in NCAAs?

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And in the end, yeah, the Spurs beat a Warriors team that had four All-Stars out. Just thinking San Antonio would gladly trade one game missing 4 top players, for a season w/ their MVP.

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Cavs coach Ty Lue is stepping away due to “health issues.” Translation – he’s sick of dealing with Lebron?

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Now reports are Donald Trump Jr. had an affair w/ a “Celebrity Apprentice” contestant. I’m sure this is somehow Hillary’s fault.

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Not sure how I feel about #CynthiaNixon‘s candidacy. But the people who attack her as a unqualified actor,  who themselves voted for Trump should STFU. (IMHO)

I’m so old I remember when the most embarrassing thing we had to explain to our children about Presidential sex involved a cigar. #StormyDanielsDickPics

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Feeling even better that I never wasted time on stupid Facebook quizzes.

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If #CambridgeAnalytica had been working on behalf of Hillary Clinton does anyone doubt GOP would be calling for criminal charges?

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Facebook just changed relationship status with its users to “it’s complicated.”

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Donald Trump is getting so agitated about idea of a “Witch Hunt” he is going to lose his black pointy hat.

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So at this point guessing no one in the GOP would point out that the Emperor was naked either?

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Trump is really into his “Witch Hunt” phrase. Does he even tweet it from “Air Force Broom?

This year, millions of Americans REALLY looking forward to few weeks of caring passionately about teams who we barely knew existed before. #MarchMadness #distraction

So apparently  Pac 12 really DID decide to take March Madness off.

For Pac 12 fans, is it worth mentioning that Stanford remains alive for an NIT championship? #MarchMadness

Cool thing about Loyola-Chicago upset today: At least Americans who picked Ramblers randomly can answer a question as to where school actually is located.

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RIP longtime University of Texas coach Augie Garrido, 79.  One of best to coach amateur teams in history. Even counting Stengel with 1962 Mets.

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So in the end will Sean Miller  be fired from Arizona because he didn’t pay players enough?

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So if Trump admits he “made up facts”  with Justin Trudeau, what other world leaders has he made up facts with? Surely not BFF Putin?

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Now Trump is firing McMaster. Do the surviving members of his administration get a rose?

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RIP Tom Benson, 90, owner of New Orleans Saints.  He’d apparently been ill since February.  Let’s hope the ending of that playoff game with Vikings didn’t ultimately kill him.

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Brand-new (and quickly installed)  pedestrian footbridge collapse is an awful story at Florida International University . No cause known yet. But good time to remember that not all “burdensome” regulations are excessive.

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There’s a reason the 1st Amendment came before the 2nd Amendment.#NationalWalkoutDay #MarchForOurLives

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So @RealDonaldTrump made up a story of a meeting w/ @JustinTrudeau in which he bragged about lying. And anyone seriously expects any other country to make deals with US?

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Now it turns out Trump may have made up meeting where he said he lied to Trudeau. Time for a new hashtag – #ThatIsSoTrump

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A second Trump lawyer is now battling to keep Stormy Daniels from talking. Uh, if it’s all lies, who cares what she says?

But seriously has Trump forgotten a cardinal rule.  Don’t screw with the people you’ve literally screwed.

How many kids did you kill today?  (From a chant during #NationalStudentWalkout)

The kids are alright. And they are going to be voting.

Barack Obama has tweeted out his NCAA brackets. Donald Trump will not share his publicly but no doubt Sarah Huckabee Sanders will announce after tournament that he had a perfect score. #MarchMadness

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You can now do the equivalent of “Quick Picks” for your NCAA brackets, ie randomly get one filled out, or a so-called “smart bracket.”  How lazy are we getting….

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So did the Pac 12 make a joint pact to take the NCAA Tournament off?

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So for younger generation will #ToysRUs now become like baby boomers’ gone-but-not-forgotten Sears Christmas catalog?

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So is there a E-harmony equivalent for prisons? Maybe they can make a match between Elizabeth Holmes & Martin Shkreli?

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Alex Jones is claiming Democrats won #PA18 by having dead people vote. So congrats to all those who had “less than 24 hours” in the pool.

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All this talk of @ConorLambPA being a DINO.  First, he’s pro-choice, pro-union, pro-universal healthcare, anti Trump tax cuts, etc.   But that district is not Los Angeles, or even Philly.    Plus remember, even DINO’s & RINO’s tend to vote party when chips are down. “Moderates” in GOP are still doing Trump’s bidding.

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Wonder why Trump didn’t appoint Larry Kudlow “drug czar?

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Nikki Haley to UN “US believes Russia is responsible for attack on 2 people in UK using a military-grade nerve agent.”
Didn’t realize Haley also wanted to leave Trump administration… #exitstrategy

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So is Melania texting Vanessa for advice tonight?

After Barack Obama was elected I remember going to see great Will Durst, and hearing him open a show with “Hi, I’m Will Durst, and I no longer have an act.”
How I miss the days when it was really hard to come up with political comedy.

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Thinking today’s #NationalStudentWalkout might make GOP inclined to raise minimum age from 18. Not for buying a gun, but for voting.

Anyone have their brackets busted yet? #UCLA

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One of these years the New Orleans Saints will start the season with a new QB. But barring injury it won’t be 2018!

Drew Brees turned down much larger guaranteed offers to resign with Saints. Nice to know that it’s not ALL about $$$. Though guessing Drew can still feed his family on $25 mill even if 2nd year not guaranteed.

Well, at least odds are good they’ll be raising an #NIT banner at a #PAC12 school this year.#MarchMadness

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Happy about #PA18. But is it just me or does Conor Lamb look like he is about 12 years old? #BlueWave2018

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So wonder who Trump will fire tomorrow to distract from #PA18 tonight?

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Whatever happens in #PA18, a very big lesson from today is that EVERY. VOTE. COUNTS.

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Breaking up with someone via Twitter is pretty universally acknowledged to be a cowardly and immature thing to do. Donald  Trump just fired Tillerson by tweet.

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If Rex Tillerson called Trump a “fucking moron” while he was working for him, imagine what he’ll call Trump now that he’s been fired?

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Trump tweet announcing Tillerson firing & new appts ends “Congratulations to all.”
Really not loving this season of Presidential Apprentice.

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Trump said without his proposed wall, people will move out of California “soon.” And many Californians are going “Promise? We need lower housing prices.”

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Really miss days when you could get on a plane, turn off internet for a few hours and not realize your first thought upon landing will probably be “WTF did he do now?

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There was more Democratic condemnation of Bill Clinton over a blow job than there is GOP condemnation of Donald Trump over a porn star, unqualified appointees, graft, Russia…

A report in the UK Daily Mail says that a family of 3 has a “1-in-17,500 chance of sitting together on a Ryanair flight unless they pay extra.”
And then of course there is a 100% chance that in those 17,499 other instances they will whine and ask other passengers to give up their good seats for the family’s middle seats.

At this point Trump Resignation-Firing Bingo might be distracting many Americans from their NCAA March Madness pools.

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Dolphins going to release #NdamukongSuh  Ouch, that will really stomp on his eg

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Who says there’s no bipartisan agreement in the US. EVERYONE hated TBS  selection show.

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A very simple question for @realDonaldTrump: If #StormyDaniels is #FakeNews then what does it matter if she goes on 60 Minutes or any other show?

Serena Williams, 18 months after having a daughter, plus having blood clots on her lungs & a hematoma after the birth, playing into 3rd round of tournament at Indian Wells. #weakersexmyass

So of course with less than a month left in NBA season, everyone predicted #Warriors & #Cavs would be sitting at #2 and #3 seeds.

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TBS  changed  Selection Sunday format, presumably for ratings. What’s next, choosing field then announcing they’re replacing a team with a runner-up? #AftertheFinalRose

USC and Notre Dame among the top snubs for #MarchMadness Setting up a possible #NIT final between 2 of schools Americans most love to hate?#Ratings

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GOP House Intel Committee ends Russia probe – “no collusion.” Guessing that blackjack dealers also would have ended a probe of gambling in Casablanca.

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Worst thing about this administration is not the ignorance, it is that for Trump, ignorance is a badge of honor.

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Tom Rooney, like Mueller, is a Republican. Just sayin’.#HouseIntelligenceCommittee

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Pelosi on GOP end of Russia-Trump probe : They’ve “abandoned their oath” to protect the American people.  Maybe not. If you consider American people just means “older white men.”

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GOP official Instagram account for Women’s History Month noted women @realDonaldTrump has “appointed to high-ranking positions”, including Melania Trump & Karen Pence. Why stop there? Certainly Trump has done wonders for Stormy Daniels’ career.

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As we remembered to put our clocks forward this weekend, can we all resolve to try to put our country forward in November? Vote! Vote! Vote! Vote! Vote! Did I mention we need to remember to vote?

Heading to March Madness,   64 down to 1.  And besides the possible Trump administration resignations, there’s a basketball tournament going on.

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Martin Shkreli apparently cried & pleaded with the judge for leniency at his sentencing. “I feel so sorry for him” said absolutely, positively nobody.

Anyone else think it would be nice if many Americans were as upset about Trump’s various misdeeds as they were about Arie dumping Becca?

Richard Sherman to the 49ers. Well, San Francisco may not make the playoffs next year. But they sure got a lot more quotable.

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I dream of a day again when Gregg Popovich can look at POTUS and decide to stick to coaching. #GoSpursGo

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#WhenTrumpMeetsKim For all those who would have liked #WhenHarryMetSally if potential nuclear war was at stake.

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Average VA (Veterans Affairs) psychologist makes under $100,000 a year. So we could hire about 300 more of them for the cost of Trump’s one-day ego-trip parade.

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Suppose that as a distraction from Stormy Daniels story Trump saying he will meet Kim Jong Un is better than starting a nuclear war.

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Trump congratulating himself on “deal with North Korea… very much in the making & will be, if completed, a very good one for the World. Time & place to be determined.” Right after he releases his tax returns?

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What visions I have seen. Methought I was enamored of an ass.” Who knew Shakespeare possibly presaged some disillusioned Trump voters?

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NRA files lawsuit over Florida gun control law raising age to 21 saying it violates 2nd amendment. Uh, except 2nd amendment applies only to landowning white men.

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Canadian study found employees who attacked voodoo dolls when upset at bosses were happier than those those who bottled in their sense of injustice. If only someone at White House was “woke” enough to order voodoo dolls.

Spurs might not even make 2018 playoffs but w/ what  Gregg Popovich has left in terms of players have to figure if he were British he’d be knighted for this coaching performance.#GoSpursGo

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Nothing against Curry but after the Western Conference finals with Zaza and Kawhi in 2017,  just maybe mean bitch karma has decided that Chris Paul should have a ring this year.

A 19 year old  Australian rugby player was at least temporarily paralyzed after he ate a poisonous garden slug on a dare. If only he had stuck to Tide Pods.

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Lamont Smith resigned as men’s basketball coach at Univ. of San Diego after being arrested for alleged domestic violence against his mistress at a team hotel. On top of everything else, shouldn’t men know by now, when you have everything to lose, be nice to your lover. Even if they aren’t a porn star.

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Happy #InternationalWomensDay Waiting for the GOP rebuttal.

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Trump coming to California next week for a fundraiser & to look at prototypes for his wall. Can we practice by building a wall to keep him out?

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Now POTUS is apparently annoyed at Sarah Huckabee Sanders.  We’re going to need a bigger card for Trump Resignation Bingo.

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So@POTUS and Kim Jong Un have agreed (for now) to meet in person. If only the meeting was between Korean leader and someone a bit more rational – like Dennis Rodman.

Kim Jong Un and Trump to meet “by May.” Think either of them think “May” might be a porn star?

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So the real question, who will play Kim Jong Un on SNL this May?

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AZ Sen. Jeff Flake threatening to introduce legislation against Trump tariffs. So after all the angry talk over racism, lies, accusing opponents of treason, who knew Flake’s red line would be tariffs? #Priorities

#ToyRUs has announced they are liquidating. I missed the Trump tweet taking credit. Jobs! Jobs! Jobs!

Now rumors are that Trump’s NDA with Stormy Daniels includes “paternity information.” We are going to have a national wide popcorn shortage

Reports are that Peyton Manning could make $10 Million a year as an analyst for Fox Sports or ESPN. And that’s before he mentions Budweiser or Papa John’s every 15 minutes.

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Ichiro, 44, signing 1-year deal with Mariners. When is Seattle making an offer to Jamie Moyer?

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Twitter report, “Kawhi spoke and said he wanted to finish his career as a Spur.”  What?  Kawhi actually spoke?

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Alexa reportedly cackling at what seems like random moments. Maybe she is laughing because of all the free information users are giving Amazon.

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Tom Brady, on his children being in tears after the Super Bowl “Look, you guys, this is a great lesson. We don’t always win. We try our best and sometimes it doesn’t go the way we want.'”
So does this mean the smartest kids have fathers who play for the Cleveland Browns?

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We impeached a President for lying about consensual affair with an intern- now barely blink when a President pays $130,000 to hush up an affair with a porn star. #NewAbnormal

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So are Jeff Sessions and Trump REALLY upset about California because our economy is so much better than in most red states?

So tell me again why California can’t just secede and become our own country? Kindler, gentler and with a MUCH better economy

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British police say former Russian spy & his daughter were poisoned with a nerve agent in Salisbury, England. Maybe Sam Nunberg wasn’t so crazy in trying to get arrested after all.

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So imagine if Bill Clinton had tried to use campaign funds to pay Monica Lewinsky not to talk about their relationship..

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Trump is now denying he had an affair with Stormy Daniels Anyone want to start a pool on the date of his first #FakeDNA tweet?

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Betsy DeVos visited Stoneman Douglas, not only wouldn’t talk to students, she abruptly walked out of her own press conference. This administration that thinks they are so brave is afraid of students and media. #snowflakes

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Anyone else a bit disappointed that Betsy Devos did not suggest protecting students with trained grizzly bears?

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Today  California Governor JerryBrown taunted Trump & Sessions, calling them liars & saying “Mueller is closing in.”   Open note to @realDonaldTrump – you can use “Moonbeam” in a tweet if you want, Jerry can take it.