Left Coast Sports Babe

SF Giants looked a little hungover after four game series with Dodgers, blowing a 3-0 lead with 2 errors and lethargic play. Until the bottom of the 9th.  When they came up with a 3 run, 2-out rally.   TGFP –  Thank God For Padres.

But Corey Seager is out for the year. Wow. So Giants broke two Dodgers in one weekend? (Him and Puig.)

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Despite FIFA’s ethics warning, Trump today again asked African nations to back the US World Cup bid.   “We will be watching very closely and any help they can give us in that bid, we would appreciate.”

At least he didn’t say “Vote for our bid because your countries are shitholes.”#smallmercies

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Quite a photo op at the White House today.  Muhammadu Buhari, the Nigerian President and  Donald Trump, the wannabe Nigerian Prince.

Ersan Ilyasova said when the 76ers played the Heat “in Miami … the gym was half-empty.” “Half-empty” -or as the Marlins call that, an opening day crowd.

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Waiting for Kanye West to say he should host next year’s WHCD.

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If White House Correspondents Association wants a really polished speaker who can tell jokes in a classy manner maybe next year they should invite as their headliner Barack Obama

Just guessing there’s pretty high correlation between people who judge Michelle Wolf much more harshly than they would a man, & those who did the same with Hillary  Clinton.

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Would it have been better if Michelle Wolf just called Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Kellyanne Conway “nasty women?”

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Trump claiming his White House has “great Energy and unending Stamina…” That’s why he needs to spend every weekend golfing and/or at one of his resorts?

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So reportedly John Kelly has repeatedly called Donald Trump “an idiot.” But let’s get to the important stuff – did he talk about Trump’s makeup?

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John Kelly says he didn’t call Trump an idiot. Of course not. Everyone in the White House knows the correct term is “f*cking moron.”

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From Urban Decay Customer Service After suggesting a “burnt lies” eyeliner with proceeds to go to a women’s charity. “That is a great idea! … this will be passed on to our upper management.” Hey, I’d buy it. #PerfectSmokeyEye

Don’t look now after winning 3 of 4 from the Dodgers, SFGiants are back to .500. #BeatLA

And Bruce Bochy says Pablo Sandoval might pitch again. Who needs Ohtani?

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Apparently, since the spread was from 6.5 to 5, Las Vegas sports books lost a lot of money when the Pacers hit a last-second three pointer to cut the Cavs’ victory margin from 7 to 4.   On the other hand, think how much Vegas would lose because millions of fans would lose interest with Lebron not playing into Round 2.

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And now that we’re approaching the end of April, it’s only SIX WEEKS left until a possible game seven of the NBA finals.

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NRA is banning guns at their “Leadership Forum” because VP Mike Pence is speaking. Uh, wait a minute, wouldn’t he be safer with thousands of “good guys with guns?”

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Speaking as a woman who struggles to just get a nice straight line on occasions I try eyeliner, I’d take “perfect smokey eye” as a compliment. #WHCD

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Trump refers to Michelle Wolf as “the filthy ‘comedian’.” Because he’s too old and tired to think of an insult based on her name?

#WHCA groveling at @realDonaldTrump’s tiny feet because presumably they worry about losing access. What’s he going to do, stop having press conferences…. ? Uh, never mind.

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So it’s okay for Trump to say Gail Collins has the “face of a dog” and to say Mika Brzezinski was “bleeding badly from a facelift.” But not to joke about Sarah Huckabee Sanders’ eye makeup? #Snowflakes

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Seriously, does anyone doubt Trump wrote this tweet in his mind BEFORE #WHCD? “Everyone is talking about the fact that the White House Correspondents Dinner was a very big, boring bust…the so-called comedian really “bombed.” #FakeOutrage

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Maybe reason media is REALLY angry at @michelleisawolf is not attacks on Sarah Huckabee Sanders but this line – Trump “has helped you sell your papers and your books and your TV. You helped create this monster and now you are profiting from him.” #TheTruthHurts

So how had the only SF Giants pitcher who would have a 1-2-3 inning in game one of a double header against LA Dodgers Saturday would be Pablo Sandoval?

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At least the Giants scored enough that Bruce Bochy didn’t have to use Panda to close in the nightcap.

Carmelo Anthony on possibilities for next year with the OKC Thunder “Yeah, I’m not sacrificing no bench role.  That’s out of the question.”

Proving once again, maybe you can’t cure cancer. But you can sometimes trade it.

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And then who had the SF Giants scoring 13 runs in two games  – more than they scored in the first week and only managing to win one?

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Just wondering how many of these newly minted experts in NFL draft will remember where three-quarters of these players were drafted by opening week?

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That moment when you read on Twitter that Paul Ryan nominated rich televangelist Joel Osteen, who wouldn’t open his 16,000 person church to hurricane Harvey victims as House Chaplain. And you have no idea if it’s satire.

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Tonight Trump told supporters in Michigan “I’d rather be with you” than in DC. Of course, on any weekend that there isn’t #WHCD he’d rather be at Mar-A-Lago or another Trump resort.

The guy who said “I really believe I’d run in there” to face an armed killer has flown to Michigan tonight to avoid facing reporters and comedians. #WHCD

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So how soon will Sephora start selling a smoky eye liner titled “Burnt lies?

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In Nogales Arizona, officer Jesus Cordova was fatally shot, allegedly by carjacking suspect David Ernesto Murillo. Awful. But how deplorable have we become when Trump trolls mourn fallen Latino cop at same time they INSIST Latino killer must have been illegal?

FIFA called out Trump on ethics after he tweeted about not supporting countries who don’t support North American World Cup 2026 bid.
Give Donald Trump credit – who else could give FIFA the moral high road?

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SF Giants beat Dodgers tonight aided by a run-scoring balk when Los Angeles reliever Baez fell off the mound.  Somewhere the ghost of Candlestick is claiming credit for a phantom wind.

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Tonight’s NBA question “WWLF” Who Will Lebron Fire? #CavsVsPacers

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Former LSU star RB Derrius Guice was chosen by the Redskins as the 59th pick, late in the 2nd round.  His draft stock had fallen significantly with rumors that there was a serious off-field issue in his past.  On a brighter note for Guice, where else but Washington, D.C, has a history of serious bad behavior become so meaningless?

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Tomorrow begins round 4 of the NFL draft. And if you’re really paying attention, and aren’t related to a potential draftee… you just might need a life.

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House report indicates that they don’t believe Michael Flynn lied to FBI agents. Well, yes, because the only real definite confirmation of that allegation came from Flynn himself with his guilty plea.

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One of those phrases we thought we’d never see “Infield hit for Buster Posey.” SFGiants

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CDC now reports 98 people sick with E-Coli from eating romaine lettuce, including 10 with kidney failure.. But hey, let’s get rid of more pesky regulations

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Trump on North Korea and South Korea “Let’s see what happens.” Translation, if they work things out I will take all the credit, and if not, it’s Hillary or Obama’s fault.

Rep. Patrick Meehan, under investigation for allegedly sexual harassing a female staffer & paying her off with tax dollars, has resigned. Wonder what Cabinet position Trump will nominate him for

Spring in Canada, the time for falling Leafs.

Some say Cubs winning World Series hastened coming of the apocalypse. Well, at least MapleLeafs won’t do their part this year by winning Stanley Cup.

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So is Reuben Foster’s ex claiming she fought with Manti T’eo’s girlfriend? #49ers

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Who the heck knows truth in Reuben Foster case. But fact remains his accuser recanted BEFORE D.A. pressed charges. We all know she’s a liar; they think she wasn’t lying then, but she’s lying now.

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The Commission on College Basketball has recommended potential lifetime bans for coaches who cheat. Over-under on how many coaches suddenly retire or move to NBA?

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There are days when I really am sorry that #SFGiants play in afternoon so I can’t watch the game after work.  Wednesday was not one of those days.

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Uh oh – quote from Oct 2017 NFL owners’ meeting “we have a president who will use (kneeling) as fodder to do his mission that I don’t feel is in the best interests of America.” From that commie-pinko Robert Kraft.

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Ben Carson wants to increase rents for low-income Americans on housing assistance. Well, someone’s got to pay to help subsidize poor investors like Sean Hannity.

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All these stories coming out about Ronny Jackson Jr. make me wonder how long until GOP will demand hearings- as to why he wasn’t fired by Obama.

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239 pounds, 289 pounds. Hey, who among us hasn’t said 3 when we meant 8? I’m sure it’s just a coincidence. #RonnyJackson

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That moment that your coffee boy lawyer takes the Fifth Amendment….

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Dear Gawd, what cabinet post will Trump try to nominate Kanye West to now?

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Amazing how many who think Americans shouldn’t boycott Kanye West’s music because of his political views are thrilled no NFL team will sign Colin Kaepernick.

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Kanye West isn’t fit to hold James Shaw Jr’s jockstrap. That is all.

(James Shaw Jr. is the Waffle House hero.)

Not the ending they wanted or expected at the beginning of the season. But so proud to be a Spurs fan.  Gutsy way to go out.  And not that it matter, really but with all the best thoughts you can send without being a cliche to Popovich and his family.    See you next year @kawhileonard.

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So looks like 76ers tanked their way into a pretty darn good team. Sorry, this isn’t a given  – to Cleveland Browns fans…

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Okay, can SF Giants fans at least put the  “Trade Brandon Belt” movement on hold for a couple weeks?

At least 10 dead in Toronto, it’s been over 24  hours, and still, not even #ThoughtsAndPrayers from @realDonaldTrump. Of course, killer appears to be white anti-woman loner. If he were Muslim or immigrant Trump would have sent at least a dozen tweets by now.

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Ronny Jackson’s confirmation hearing has been delayed, reportedly over allegations including excessive drinking. Well, how much do you have to drink to say with a straight face that Trump weighs 239 pounds?

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Millions of Americans want to say “un grand merci” to #Macron for distracting @realDonaldTrump for one day from doing more damage than he might otherwise have done.

Stories emerging of profanity-filled tirades during Clinton Presidential debate preparation in 2016 –  have to think if Hillary had actually dropped some F-bombs at Trump during the debates she might have won the election.

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Not sure what’s worse – GOP senators marching in lockstep behind Trump, or the ones who call him out and then crawl into line when it’s time to vote.

Nothing against Sacramento but when someone hits a home run 464 feet to right center right handed, at AT&T Park in SF, guessing that someone has no intention of moving back there. #MacWilliamson #SFGiants

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Mac Williamson is a graduate of Wake Forest.  Actually turned down being drafted by Red Sox to return for senior year.  As a Spurs fan am predisposed to be fond of four-year Demon-Deacons.  (Tim Duncan.)

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SFGiants waited until April 23 to play their first game outside of the West.  Even interleague games were against Seattle and Anaheim.  Now I KNOW a computer does these early season schedules. But just maybe, especially after all these early season “snow outs”   someone should program a little climate change into the computer?

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That 21 pitch Brandon Belt AB Sunday lasted longer than some celebrity marriages.

Martha Karolyi doesn’t feel she should be held responsible for Nassar’s actions. This is a woman with her husband who taught little girls that the team and ranch were more important than your biological family?

Congrats to Will and Kate on the birth of their third child.  It’s a small good thing in the universe, but in the British line of succession, Princess Charlotte now gets to stay ahead of her new baby brother. #progress

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Waffle House hero James Shaw, Jr,  has also started a Go Fund Me campaign that has raised over $50,000 for victims’ families. He works for AT&T in Nashville. Not sure what Shaw does for them, but guessing he deservesld use a promotion, and a raise.

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Now that they have Waffle House shooting suspect in custody can they also arrest his father who admitted giving him back his guns?

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With the new Trump Giuliani “bromance” why should anyone doubt that two men with 6 marriages between them will stay loyal to each other?

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Rand Paul performs usual routine of “most-principled-man-alive” until he isn’t, do get some idea of why his neighbor felt need to jump him.

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So would Press Secretary Sanders like to explain how she thinks Democrats opposing Trump hate their country, but when GOP opposed Obama on EVERYTHING they were just being good patriots or something?

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US Senator Ted Cruz bringing up the incident in Toronto on Fox News now: “We obviously don’t know the details yet, but it underscores what a dangerous world we’re in…This is a perilous time… We need a strong, steady hand as secretary of state”
Pompeo is a “strong, steady hand” like Ted Cruz is Mr. Congeniality.

Man who ended up in White House in part because Americans considered Hillary’s private email server a security risk is now apparently calling friends & advisors on his personal cell phone. #WTF?

George H.W. Bush in intensive care.  And Barbara is looking down saying “Men! You can’t even take care of yourself for a few DAYS without me!”

Awful day in Toronto, one of the world’s best cities. Increasingly looking like the attack WASN’T terrorism though. Especially as Trump isn’t tweeting about it.

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When tragedies strike US, @JustinTrudeau always quick to respond with kindness on social media. Today after Toronto attack, crickets from @realDonaldTrump.
As an American, I apologize for our president.
Je suis Americain et je m’excuse pour notre président.

A’s lefty Sean Manaea pitched a no-hitter against Red Sox. Thank goodness for visiting Boston fans which meant more than 500 people saw it.

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Happy Earth Day. Waiting for the GOP rebuttal.

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So did Utah Republicans just basically tell Mitt Romney to stay home and knit?

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A reminder about Trump’s tweet rant Saturday, he was doing all of it while he was supposedly watching Barbara Bush’s funeral. #soPresidential

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The single best thing Trump ever did for Barbara Bush was improve her oldest son’s reputation by comparison.

Guess nobody told Trump that it was his own side that released Comey memos?

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Trump talking about Mar-A-Lago as the “Southern White House.” Uh, in the US there is no Southern White House.  Not since 1865.

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What’s next, Mar-A-Lago flying the Confederate flag?

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If Mar-A-Lago is the “Southern White House” how come we can’t all apply for the free public tours?

Waffle House killer  killer is apparently a white man. So he has to be mentally ill and not a terrorist.

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At time of posting, waiting for #thoughtsandprayers from Trump over Waffle House shooting..
GUARANTEE he’d have tweeted about if if shooter were Muslim or an immigrant.

Amazed #WaffleHouse shooter is still at large. Not that someone in Tennessee would stand out with an AR15. But you’d think they’d call cops fast on a man who was running around mostly naked.

(As Henry Schulman pointed out, they scored 10 % of their runs so far – for the YEAR – in one inning today.)

Until yesterday, figured Gregg Popovich should have serious consideration for @NBA coach of year for all he’d had to overcome this year with the team. Had no idea….

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And this, btw, is worth a read, seriously.

https://www.expressnews.com/sports/columnists/mike_finger/article/As-Pop-mourns-world-sees-what-it-missed-12849790.php

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So anyone else assume that when @Twitter goes down for a while that Trump must have broken it?

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On #NationalSchoolWalkoutDay would GOP care to state again how they feel students and teachers should be armed?

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Forget #IKEA robots, is there a robot that can help parents figure out the toys they buy for their kids? Asking for a country with 8 months notice until Christmas.

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Remember those innocent days when the worst we had to explain to our kids about President and sex was a blow job? #bookers#peetape#goldenshowers

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Well, you know, who could respect a woman who stayed with a cheating husband? #misogyny

 Trouble with hiring a lawyer who has absolutely no scruples about saving you your ass, is that he’s going to apply the same standards to saving his own. #MichaelCohen  

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If Mueller wants to confirm Trump spent a night at Moscow Ritz, just get travel writer to say how much more opulent & beautiful it is than any Trump hotel. Tweet saying ‘It is NOT. #FakeNews”  should take about 2 minutes.

“Special Council?” As much as Barbara Bush believed in literacy, maybe this @RealDonaldTrump Presidency really killed her?

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So is Wendy Wasserman Schultz related to Adele Dazeem?

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CDC has warned Americans to stop eating romaine lettuce over possible E-Coli fears. So shouldn’t Trump keep romaine on Mar-A-Lago menu to prove that the CDC is a job-killing regulator that needs spending cuts?

San Antonio Spurs coach Gregg Popovich’s wife Erin passed away today. Nothing funny about this. So sad.

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We always knew Popovich sees the big picture beyond sports. Apparently his wife was ill for a long time. but no complaints, no excuses. Hope at least now Pop knows how much he is loved and admired in and beyond NBA.

Yeah, tell me we don’t need a stronger word than deplorable….. Happened to read the SF Chronicle online story on death of Erin Popovich. And the FIRST comment, “Gregg Popovich has yet to offer public comment.” “As expected Pop continues to be too busy to even acknowledge the death of his wife. More concerned about attacking our President..’.”
Maybe six words ‘Sad excuse for a human being.”

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As #SFGiants fan I’ve almost forgotten what a “save situation” was.  Giants apparently missed them so much they ended up having two of them.  And almost blowing both.

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So #SFGiants are keeping #macwilliamson in Sacramento because they aren’t sure he can hit major league pitching. Well, they are sure 2018 team these days can’t.

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Orrin Hatch asks what there were “10 babies on the floor of the Senate?”. Well if you leave out a little detail like chronological age there are a lot more than 10 babies on floor of Senate. Starting with Mitch McConnell.

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And we wonder how Senators get their spineless reputations.    After Senate deadlocked 49-49 for about an hour Wednesday on a vote to break a filibuster of James Bridenstine, who has no management experience and doesn’t believe in Climate Change,  to be next head of NASA,  Jeff Flake returned to Senate floor and switched to “yes..”  Thoughts and prayers?

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The entire island of Puerto Rico has just lost power. I missed the Trump tweet taking credit.

Trump is so proud of golfing with Japan PM Shinzo Abe but maybe he can ask Abe’s advice on Puerto Rico power situation. Since Japan is, you know, a country of islands.

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Trump does realize that tweeting a picture with Prime Minister of Japan at Trump International Golf Club and tagging it officially  with Department of State  and White House hash tags is a crime?  #Emoluments

Toronto Raptors might be the best NBA team most Americans have barely heard of…

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Police raided FSU QB Deondre Francois’s Tallahassee apartment on a tip he was selling pot, but they found less than an ounce of marijuana. Wonder how long until Francois transfers to Colorado or Washington?

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Anthony Rizzo says the baseball season is too long. Jeez, get a team in the postseason for a few years and they turn into snowflakes. @cubs

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Maybe if Mueller really wants to keep his job he can tell Trump that on the day he is fired an associate will release the pee tape.

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C’mon Nikki Haley, come over to anti-Trump dark side. We have cookies. And can’t wait to read your resignation letter ending “Bless your heart.”

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Starbucks is going to close its 8,000 US company-owned stores for one afternoon to education employees about racial bias. So now will an entirely new group #BoycottStarbucks?

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So I know #bustohell jokes are inappropriate now but if I die in a freak airline accident I hereby give all my friends & family permission to make #airplanetohell joke. #Southwest

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RIP Barbara Bush. After she stopped medical intervention she was still sipping bourbon. We all should go out with such style.

A fun Barbara Bush story back when Jenna Bush was getting into relatively mild but regular trouble.   Jenna in an interview “I’m known around the family as Grandma’s revenge on George.”

Trump started out this am ranting about Stormy Elliott.  At least @realDonaldTrump didn’t tweet this morning that #BarbaraBush“wouldn’t have been his first choice?

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Trump also tweeting about the advantages of online retailers not collecting sales tax.  The Trump Store only collects sales tax from buyers in two states.

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We are finally within two MONTHS of a NBA finals potential game seven, scheduled for Jun 17, 2018.  And they say the baseball season is too long.

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So will Cooperstown ask for the broken handle of Bryce Harper’s bat?

(for those who didn’t see, he hit a ball, broke his bat, and it went for a 400 plus foot home run.)

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Washington Post profiled some unhappy mostly rural Texas voters who are unhappy with Gregg Popovich’s political outspokenness and attacks on Trump. They say some of them can no longer be Spurs fans. Now, where’s the article on all the more liberal fans who have been listening to Pop and are BIGGER, or even first time Spurs fans.

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Bad enough that a Canadian team hasn’t won the Stanley Cup in forever.  But now one of the league’s best team’s is an expansion team in…. Las Vegas. #insulttoinjury

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A’s are giving away free tickets to Tuesday’s game. How bad will it get before they offer to PAY fans to show up?

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Manager of Philadelphia Starbucks who called cops on black men reported “no longer works” at location. Have they accepted a job at Fox News cafeteria?

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So now Sean Hannity turns out to be a Michael Cohen client…. We really are going to have a nationwide popcorn shortage.

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So yeah, don’t we all expect attorney client privilege from someone who isn’t our lawyer? #SeanHannity

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So now it’s Nikki Haley who’s been thrown under the Trump bus with @realDonaldTrump contradicting her sanctions announcement yesterday. Damn, I didn’t have her in Resignation Bingo.

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If you’re still supporting Trump and Hannity right now presume you’ll be okay if a Democratic President and Rachel @maddow behave the same way in future?

If someone came to a major studio with a movie script that paralleled events in @realDonaldTrump administration they’d have been told to come back with something more realistic.

Bartolo Colon, 44, took a perfect game into the 8th inning Sunday against the Houston Astros.   Like Tom Brady, it must be that hard-core fitness regime that keeps him ageless?

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Of course, many might think that watching Colon will dispel the rumor of baseball players being true athletes once and for all.

So the Spurs got blown out in game 1 because they are missing their superstar.  What was Cavs excuse?

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Wonder if Cavs coach  Tyronn Lue will have a recurrence of whatever illness caused him to step away from the team in March?

23 1/2 inches of snow in Green Bay, Wisconsin, 2nd-heaviest snowstorm of all time, 27 inches of rain in 24 hours in Kauai. But no, we don’t have climate change….

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Whatever you think of the Bush presidents, they both married up. Wishing the best for Barbara Bush.

It’s not an “either-or” question – America doesn’t have to respect Trump OR Comey.

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No response from yet @realDonaldTrump on #Comeyinterview So staff must have done a better job than usual of hiding his phone.

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So did Trump use #MissionAccomplished as a dig at W? Or is he really so clueless he has no idea what Americans now think that means?

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Since Trump may be at Mar-A-Lago all week is there any way someone can give America a break by cutting the TV cable?

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Trump’s campaign committee reportedly spent $3.9 million that Trump’s committee spent in the first quarter of 2018,  and more than $834,000  of that went to eight law firms and the Trump Corp. for legal fees,  according to the FEC.

Well, at least it’s “jobs! jobs! jobs!” for lawyers.

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Remember when weirdest story involving a former FBI director was J. Edgar Hoover’s rumored cross-dressing?

‘Chicago WhiteSox & Minnesota Twins canceled last 3 games of 4 game series over a spring snowstorm. Somewhere the ghost of the Metrodome is laughing.

At least Trump doesn’t know or care enough about baseball to insult our intelligence by pretending he honors #JackieRobinsonDay

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Uf misery loves company then this 2018 season SF Giants and Dodgers may become BFFs indeed.

New Eagles CB Daryl Worley reportedly found passed out behind the wheel in a car blocking South Philadelphia highway. So just wondering, when will NFL contracts start banning risky behavior like driving?

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Kelly Kraft missed the cut at RBC Heritage by a stroke after a tee-shot hit a bird and landed in water, Kraft’s response later “I got screwed.” HE got screwed? What about the bird?

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200 million eggs recalled over salmonella fears with 22 illnesses at least reported so far. But hey, who needs pesky regulations?

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Credit where credit is due. Trump has been a disaster in most ways for the country. But he’s revitalized SNL.

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With all the stupid things @readdonaldTrump has ever tweeted, wouldn’t you think he’d have at least learned not to use #MissionAccomplished.

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Just wondering what Robert Mueller will consider #MissionAccomplished?

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Nikki Haley says US remains “locked and loaded” to strike Syria again in response to new chemical attacks. She misspoke – Let me correct – “in response to any new bombshell from Mueller investigation.”

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Trump tweeting ” Syrian raid was so perfectly carried out, with such precision,…& attacking “Fake News Media” at same time White House releases alleged Syria situation room picture w/ VP Pence who wasn’t even on same continent. Once again, lies, damn lies, and Trumpisms

(and hey, when they tweeted out a years’ old picture of Mike Pence at a Colts game, ostensibly to show him before he walked out of another game over an anthem protest…. well we should have know… no lie too petty.)

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This live-action Wag the Dog sequel really sucks.

“The 49ers organization is aware of today’s disturbing charges regarding Reuben Foster. Reuben is aware his place in our organization is under great scrutiny and will depend on what is learned through the legal process.”

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SF 49ers LB Reuben Foster just charged w/ felony domestic violence Thursday after alleged attack on girlfriend in Feb. And 29 other teams who passed on the star LB in NFL draft have to be feeling pretty good about that decision.

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As the Trump housekeeper rumors hit the 24 hour news cycle I remember one of my favorite “Tonight Show” episodes with Johnny Carson and Joan Rivers. They were arguing over whether men or women were better. After a bit of back and forth, Joan said, “Johnny, a woman always knows EXACTLY how many children she has in the world”
Johnny started to respond, stopped, thought about it for a second, and said “You win.”.

Maybe it’s just me, but thinking that for 49ers fans giving Richard Sherman a pass on some past behavior is a no-brainer compared at this point to defending Reuben Foster.

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I really miss days when troubled relationship between a Kardashian and an NBA player would have been the biggest social media concern of the week

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New study found “night owls” — people who prefer to stay up later — had a 10% higher mortality rate than early birds. Well of course, probably stress-related illnesses caused by putting up with morning people.

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Amazed how conservatives who talk about “gay lifestyle” and “perversion” seem to have no problem with heterosexuals who cheat on their (plural) wives. #Pompeo

Mitch McConnell is married to Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao. So would they have to retire together to use the “spend time with family” excuse?

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If Donald  Trump could make millions on Trump-branded marijuana he’d probably change his mind on legalization too. #JohnBoehner

It’s not that a doorman got $30,000 and a porn star got $130,000. I want to know who got the REAL big $$$ from Donald Trump.

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Maybe Trump is afraid we’ll find out about an illegitimate daughter because he tried to date her?

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Forget shooting someone on 5th Avenue. Beginning to think if @realDonaldTrump told his fans “Sorry suckers, it was never about MAGA it’s just about making me richer,” they’d respond “Isn’t he wonderful being so honest.”

If anyone wanted their children to really work on serious math skills they could have just had them work to figure out potential playoff seedings before tonight’s NBA final regular season, or should I say, preseason, games.

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If the Warriors win it all will they be first NBA champions to have lost their final regular season game by 40 points.

Last time Timberwolves were in NBA playoffs, fans couldn’t even take to social media to celebrate. (Facebook just started Feb 2004, opened to non-students in 2006. Twitter started in 2006)

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Happy #NationalPetDay. Worth a reminder that @realDonaldTrump is first President in modern memory without a pet. Because he has enough GOP lapdogs & no cat would put up with him?

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Ok, I get that good people can disagree on issues. But Trump judicial nominee Wendy Vitter just refused to say if she agreed w/ Brown v. Board of Education.#WTF? Many “fine” people….

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If there are any rational Republicans left trying to be the voice of reason that Trump will listen to perhaps they could quickly get a gig on “Fox and Friends?”

Did rookie Tyler Beede in his first start not get the SF Giants memo? – “Don’t pitch to Goldschmidt.”

Maybe  SFGiants put up a big sign next to the warm-up pitching mound? “WHEN IT MATTERS, NEVER PITCH TO GOLDSCHMIDT. EVER.”

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They could create a really tough SAT math question on trying to figure out potential NBA playoff seedings with ONE game left in the regular season.

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Trump today honored Alabama national champions college football team.  Donaldhad attended game but  after he left at halftime Crimson Tide came back from 13-0 deficit. Who said @POTUS never accomplished anything

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EPA apparently can’t come up with any ACTUAL death threats against Scott Pruitt. But you know, grizzly bears….

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Air Canada has now announced FIVE different fare types for flights within North America, ranging from non-changeable with no seat assignments to fully flexible. And of course all passengers will carefully read the differences so there will be no problems at the airport.

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Damn, I missed Tom Bossert in Trump resignation bingo.

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I think almost worse than impeachment for @RealDonaldTrump will if be Robert Mueller is named ‘Time Man of the Year.”

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How much would we love to see President “Witch Hunt” asked if he could describe what actually happened in Salem?

Apparently @realDonaldTrump is unclear on the subject of breaking into an office. FBI used a search warrent. Watergate was a break-in.

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Rand Paul says FBI raid on Michael Cohen office was “a great overstep” in Mueller investigation. Uh, doesn’t he want to see what they found before he says that?

From TC on  Lindsey Buckingham parting ways with Fleetwood Mac. “They told him He Could Go His Own Way!

Cubs home opener snowed out. Only thing colder are SF Giants’ bats.

Six of the nine games SFGiants have played they have scored 1 or 0 runs. Clearly they miss Madbum at the plate.

Not only do the Giants need to start hitting to stay competitive in the National League’s Western division, they also need to make some effort to claim at their Giants Dugout store that they are selling “game-used bats.”

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That moment when you have to outscore the Sacramento Kings by 19 in 4th quarter at home to clinch playoff spot. On brighter note Pop might be so frustrated he decides to run for President?

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Packers WR Trevor Davis was arrested when he checked in at LAX & in response to usual questions, asked his companion if “she remembered to pack the explosives.” You almost hope he’s had a concussion. #cantfixstupid

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GB wide receiver Trevor Brown, arrested for joking about having a bomb at LAX, is a Cal grad. And they wonder why Stanford makes Weenie jokes?

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Meanwhile, Lindsey Buckingham has parted ways with Fleetwood Mac. Having a 1980’s flashback.

Imagine all you idealistic young law students, you too can grow up to spend $130,000 of your own money on a porn star who accuses your client, and then have your office raided by FBI….

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So maybe FBI was raiding Michael Cohen’s office looking for the covfefe?

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Trump may be learning the hard way – don’t f*ck with a professional who screws other people for a living. #StormyDaniels

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Trump “Many people have said ‘you should fire’ Mueller.” Translation of “Many people” – “Putin plus all the voices in his head.”

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If Trump does fire Mueller who will be the first GOP member of Congress to call for “thoughts and prayers?

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If a man died & 6 NYFD firefighters were injured at a Clinton owned building, GOP would be saying it was as bad as Chappaquddick.

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Meanwhile Trump will bomb Syria to smithereens before he does something drastic like allow some Syrian refugees into USA.

Is there ANY Republican not retiring who is willing to say firing Mueller is a Red Line? Or is it really $$$$ over all? Asking for a country.

Once again, if Mueller is on a Witch Hunt and there is nothing in Cohen’s records that implicates Trump then POTUS should be thrilled for opportunity for vindication…