Posted tagged ‘Running of the bulls jokes’

Say what?

July 12, 2015

There is a rumor that McDonald’s “Minions” toys, instead of spouting gibberish, actually speak in profanities. Is this a shameless ploy to sell more Happy Meals to pre-teens?

 

Once again it’s time for the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona, which brings people from around the world to Spain. You know, for a lot less money these folks could stay home and play in traffic?

Tiger Woods, back at St Andrews for the first time in years said “It’s totally changed.” “Thinking the same about you” responded the Old Course.

 

Mark Cuban, after DeAndre Jordan apologized on Twitter for backing out of a verbal agreement to join the Mavericks “When is an apology not an apology? When you didn’t write it yourself. Next.”

Thinking one of the most anticipated NBA games of the year may be when the Clippers come to Dallas.

A new GOP presidential poll shows Donald Trump and Jeb Bush tied at the top with about 15% each. If this keeps up, Trump’s campaign will attract some serious donations. From Hillary Clinton.

 

Donald Trump at a speech in Phoenix today- “Don’t worry, we’ll take our country back.” Back to what, the 19th century?

Three things that should never be seen at ‪#‎ATTPark‬: The DH, Dodger Blue, and the wave ‪#‎SFGiants‬

Seeing the ‪#‎Phillies‬ on your upcoming MLB schedule is like seeing the ‪#‎Astros‬ used to be. ‪#‎goodtimes‬ ‪#‎SFGiants‬

Joel Embiid, the 76ers top pick and #3 overall in the 2014 draft, sat out last season with a foot injury. Now he needs another surgery and will probably miss next season as well. Guess it’s not too early for Philadephia to start scouting 2016 draft picks.

Goldstar has the Raiders-Cardinals preseason NFL game on August 30 for $12.50 in Oakland. Hmm, are they offering to charge us or to pay us?

 

From  Marc Ragovin “Jason Pierre-Paul on his fireworks fiasco and its aftermath: “There’s no need to point fingers.”

Just call him Babe.

July 13, 2014

madbum

Madison Bumgarner, leaving the mound in the 7th inning today in a game where he was not only the winning pitcher, but hit a double and a grand slam. The real shame of him leaving when he did. Madbum’s turn at bat was coming up.

Is it too late to add Madison Bumgarner to the All Star Game home run derby roster? #SFGiants

 

#Madbum was saying all week he wanted to hit in the All-Star game home run derby, and was texting NL Captain Troy Tulowitzki about it. Troy’s got to be second guessing that decision about now.


Maybe now that the #WorldCup is over the SF Giants realized they were allowed to score without penalty kicks.

(actually posted before today’s game that “You know it’s been a rough month when your starting pitcher comes into a game with a higher batting average than four of your starting lineup.” After his double and grand slam, Bumgarner now has a higher batting average than anyone on the team except Hunter Pence.

Who’s done a better acting job in the last month? The floppers of the #WorldCup or millions of Americans who pretended to care about soccer?


Understatement of the year. Eric Holder, in responding to Sarah Palin’s call for Obama’s impeachment. ““She wasn’t a particularly good vice presidential candidate.”


So figure… the last game before the All-Star break between the Yankees and Orioles ended up in a rain delay…. and was called after midnight. Might have been the first game ever played Monday of All-Star week.

Colin Kaepernick apparently has a new tattoo. How could anyone tell?


Cornerback CB Jimmy Smith was arrested at a suburban Baltimore bar last night and charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct. Smith is the 5th Raven to be arrested this off-season. How long until Baltimore changes their team color to orange?

CNN has decided to make yesterday’s story of the United flight diverted to Midway Island today’s front page news. Standby for tomorrow’s story of all the islands where they COULD have diverted MH370.

ESPN story talked about “bravery” with the “Running of the Bulls in Pamplona. Can think of a number of adjectives. “Bravery is not in the top ten. (If we’re going for “Bs” – “Braindead”, maybe.)

Break time.

July 9, 2012

We’re currently in the Major League Baseball All Star break.  The only three days between April and September when Cubs fans KNOW their team won’t disappoint them.

Robinson Cano, last year’s Home Run Derby winner,   hit zero home runs today.   What is Cano trying to do, get traded to the San Francisco Giants?

Adam Lambert is reportedly in talks to become a judge on American Idol. The biggest hangup, having him on the show might create a “who’s prettier” tension with Ryan Seacrest.

One happy Monday thought: If you can read this post your computer hasn’t been compromised by the DNSChanger malware.

The Katie Holmes-Tom Cruise divorce has been finalized, in less than two weeks. With damage control talent like this Cruise clearly has a future in politics.

Worst thing for SF Giants fans about today’s Home Run Derby. Prince Fielder’s win today isn’t going to make it any easier for the team to convince Pablo Sandoval he needs to lose weight.

You cannot make this “stuff” up: Eagles RB Dion Lewis was arrested when, allegedly intoxicated, he pulled the fire alarm after locking himself out of his hotel in New York. Lewis was in town to speak at the Troy Boys & Girls Club about “things like how to make better choices.” (The talk has been rescheduled.)

Not a fan of cheating, but regarding all this controversy now over Lance Armstrong and doping, do any cycling fans think ANYONE was clean during his era?

Reggie Jackson, who is a “Yankees special assistant” has been told to stay away from team events indefinitely after his comments about A-Rod etc. But really, hiring Reggie and expecting him not to say anything controversial? Who’s the team’s next managerial prospect – Ozzie Guillen?

As the GOP dismisses talk about Romney’s Swiss bank accounts, along with his holdings in the Cayman Islands and Bermuda, have to wonder, what would they be saying if Obama had money overseas, even small accounts in Kenya or Indonesia?

-Hope Solo has received a USADA warning after testing positive for Canrenone. She says it was an “honest mistake” with “a medication prescribed by my personal doctor for pre-menstrual purposes that I did not know contained a diuretic” Wonder how long it will take some baseball player to use the same excuse?.

(As my friend Tony Alan Banks says :   “Manny’s just sorry he didn’t think of this.”)

From Bill Littlejohn:  “Andy Murray and Great Britain were unable to break a 76-year Wimbledon men’s singles title drought.   So, back in 1936, did someone bring a billy goat to Centre Court?”

The headline reads “Three gored on the third day running of the bulls.” Should read “Three miss in valiant attempts for Darwin award.”

Women just do not get it with this running of the bulls stuff. I mean, for us there’s got to be a purpose for that kind of mad dash where you’re likely to be trampled…. like a REALLY good Black Friday sale.