Posted tagged ‘copa jokes’

Busted aces?

June 26, 2016

Last night Madison Bumgarner gave up 3 runs.  Today Johnny Cueto gave up 6 runs,  Justin Verlander gave up 8 runs, and Clayton Kershaw gave up 4 runs. Okay, this really could be a sign of the apocalypse.

On other hand, Sunday the Royals, Rangers, Orioles, Marlins, Indians, Twins, Angels, As, Dbacks, Rockies, Cardinals, Mariners, Giants and Phillies all have scored at least 6 runs.  So maybe Kershaw’s four runs weren’t that bad.

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Congrats to Arizona and Coastal Carolina who will meet in the finals of the College World Series. Many people are thinkng “I didn’t know Coastal Carolina had a baseball team. Heck, many people are thinking, “I didn’t even know Coastal Carolina had a university.

 

The Pittsburgh Pirates won three games from the LA Dodgers this weekend. No punchline, I just liked writing that. ‪#‎SFGiants‬.

 

Cubs’ ace Jake Arrieta, a TCU alum, apparently has to get a CCU tattoo after losing a bet to teammate Tommy La Stella, a Coastal Carolina alum, over the College World Series.
Uh, wouldn’t you think Arrieta is making enough money he could have risked something less painful like a car or a Rolex? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

Pete Rose was very emotional today at a ceremony the Cincinnati Reds had to retire his number. Wonder what odds he had gotten on it happening?

Mitch McConnell when asked if Donald Trump is qualified for the presidency, said he’ll “leave that to the American people to decide.” Wait, don’t we elect Senators to make the tough decisions for us?

In Lebanon, an endangered sea turtle is being treated by a rescue group after tourists dragged it out of the water, and apparently took selfies with it and beat it with sticks. Where is a great white shark when you really need one?

Of course we knew that Palin would weigh in Brexit. Not only did she congratulate England but “America can learn an encouraging lesson from this.’It is time to dissolve political bands that connect us to agendas not in our best interest. May UN shackles be next on the chopping block,’
Uh, Sarah, even North Korea is part of the UN….

SF Chronicle is reporting the story of a man whose North Beach apartment rent instantly jumped from $1,800 to $8000 a month. Many people will read this and go “That’s appalling.” Some San Franciscans will read this and go “You can get an apartment in North Beach for $8,000 a month?”

 

After ‪#‎Chile‬‘s win over ‪#‎Argentina‬ in ‪#‎COPA‬, Lionel ‪#‎Messi‬ says he is quitting the Argentina national team -#Messi-exit?

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The end i$ in $ight?

June 18, 2016

Ratings have been so high for ‪#‎NBAFinals‬ waiting for the first conspiracy theorist to suggest ‪#‎NBA‬ & officials will somehow try to get a game 8.

Some question as to whether or not Tim ‪#‎Lincecum‬ was ready to face major league hitting. Looks like he was at least ready to face the Oakland As.

Vin Scully last night, in talking about a player from Venezuela, said “socialism failing to work, as it always does.” To be fair, maybe Vin is upset about the Dodgers with MLB’s luxury tax and revenue sharing.

Major difference between the ‪#‎MEXvCHI‬ rout Saturday in Levi’s Stadium and most ‪#‎49ers‬ games?   Mexico fans filled the stadium and stayed longer.

And at 7-0 at least Chile scored a touchdown.

Among many ideas for redeveloping Penn Station in New York City,  is a proposed thrill ride that would charge $35 for a free fall experience.  Uh, okay, but for locals who really enjoy free-falling, aren’t they already satisfied with the Knicks?

 

#‎ChelseaClinton‬ has announced the birth of a baby boy, ‪#‎HillaryClinton‬‘s 2nd grandchild. Waiting for the ‪#‎GOP‬ rebuttal.

 

Billionaire Charles Koch has not endorsed in the presidential race, but last month he contributed $3 million to “Freedom Partners” a super PAC supporting GOP senators. Maybe the PAC should rename itself honestly – “Republicans Surviving Hillary Because We Won’t Survive Trump.

A frustrated Donald Trump “It would be helpful if the Republicans could help us a little bit.” The GOP to Trump “Back at ya.”

The Trump campaign sent out an email “Right now we’re facing an emergency goal of $100,000 to help get our ads on the air. We need your contribution by 11:59 P.M. Tonight.”
Finally, Trump is acting like a real candidate.

Sarah Palin posted a rant today on Facebook starting out “President Obama is a Special Kind of Stupid.” Does this even need a punchline?

 

#‎MSN‬ poll: 74% in US think ‪#‎Game7‬ will be close. (34% ‪#‎Cavs‬, 40% ‪#‎Warriors‬.) Shocking, 74% think any 2016 ‪#‎NBAFinals‬ game will be close?