Posted tagged ‘ali jokes’

Going pro, or rather semi-pro

June 8, 2016

Kentucky coach John Calipari said the Philadelphia 76ers should select the Wildcats’ Jamal Murray as the No. 1 pick in the June 23 NBA draft. So what did Murray ever do to him?

Johnny Manziel is allegedly still holding out hope for a return to football in 2016. “Give it up already,” responded Tim Tebow.

 

#‎SteveKerr‬  asked about ‪#‎Cavs‬ aggressive start after the first quarter of game 3.. “What did you see in response from your guys?” “Not a whole lot.” ‪#‎Popwouldbepround‬ ‪#‎GSWvsCLE‬

But so  what ‪#‎Cavs‬ needed to compete with ‪#‎Warriors‬ was for ‪#‎KevinLove‬ to get a concussion? Heck, a Cleveland  teammate might have clocked him sooner.

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“The Greatest” wanted his funeral to be free and so 15,000 tickets were given away in Louisville. Now of course, people are trying to sell the free tickets on Ebay etc. Ali family spokesman Bob Gunnell said “I’m personally disgusted and amazed that someone would try to profit off of Muhammad Ali’s memorial service.”
“Disgusted,” I get. “Amazed….?” Someone hasn’t been paying attention.

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‪#‎BristolPalin‬ has married her baby daddy. And millions of Americans are asking “Which one?”

Guess resort fees aren’t enough. MGM Resorts International in Las Vegas is now charging for parking at all their properties. Ah, for the days when the only bandits in town were the one-armed variety.

Maria Sharipova has been banned from tennis for two years for using PEDs. And at the same time Hillary wins the Democratic nomination we are reminded it’s not always a good thing when women prove they can be equal to men.

Bill Nye “the Science Guy” says that conservatives need an “epiphany” to attract younger voters. Okay, “science” is one strike against him, does Nye really think it will help his cause to use high-faluting words like “epiphany?”

#‎Kasich‬ is holding steady at about 11% in ‪#‎CaliforniaPrimary‬ . That’s about as high as he got in most states when he was still campaigning.

Despite Hillary Clinton’s winning California by about 13%, the networks didn’t call the primary win for her until about 4a. In related news, the same networks are saying the Golden State Warriors still have a pretty good chance to win the NBA championship.

Email from Bernie Sanders today “The struggle continues.” Yes, it does. But the arithmetic does not.

 

Convicted rapist and former Stanford swimmer Brock Turner  is apparently filing an appeal, even with his slap-on-the-wrist sentence.   Hmm, can someone make up some #20minutesofaction” t-shirts for Turner to give to his future wife and/or daughters?

 

The Guardian has leaked a letter that convicted rapist Brock Turner sent to the judge in his case “I’ve been shattered by the party culture and risk taking behavior that I briefly experienced in my four months at school. I’ve lost my ability to obtain a Stanford degree. I’ve lost employment opportunity, my reputation and most of all, my life.” ‪#‎getouttheviolins‬

 

 

Stuart Anderson, founder of the Black Angus Steakhouse chain, has passed away at the age of 93. No details on services yet, but no doubt coupon discounts will be available.

To bury and to praise him

June 5, 2016

Nice statement from President Obama today: ‘Muhammad Ali was The Greatest. Period. If you just asked him, he’d tell you.
But what made The Champ the greatest – what truly separated him from everyone else – is that everyone else would tell you pretty much the same thing.”

So maybe if Trump isn’t a a complete fraud it’s time to test the man for severe memory impairment. The Donald quickly praised Ali last night, but in December after the President criticized his proposed ban Trump tweeted out “Obama said in his speech that Muslims are our sports heroes. What sport is he talking about, and who?”.

 

Here’s a thought about Trump’s praise of Ali after saying there were no Muslim sports stars. Maybe he doesn’t know Muhammad Ali was a Muslim. ‪#‎heswrongaboutmosteverythingelse‬

 

Really boggles the mind to imagine what it would have been like if ‪#‎MuhammadAli‬ at his peak in a social media age? ‪#‎mostfollowersofalltime‬

 

Ads on the ‪#‎MLB‬ “Game of the Week” telling us to go to Hooters for the food. Like old days of reading Playboy for the articles. ‪#‎SFvsSTL‬

You start seeing one of the problems for the Cavaliers. A SF Chronicle headline “Kerr has the magic touch; James searching.” The Warriors have a good team AND a real coach

 

Jeff Samardzija didn’t end up having a good day for the SF Giants,  giving up 4 home runs in what seemed like about two minutes. But he did get a single and an RBI. Fox announcers seemed shocked. Clearly they aren’t paying attention. ‪#‎Pitcherswhorake‬

James Shields was traded to the White Sox.  He was a disappointment with the Padres.But being fair, it’s hard to live up to the nickname “Big Game Shields” when your team has no big games.

 

Canada is changing a line in their national anthem from “in all thy sons command” to “in all of us command.” Why? As Justin Trudeau recently said, “It’s 2016.” ‪#‎IblameObama‬ ‪#‎IblameTrudeau‬

Southwest. already the largest airline in terms of passengers beginning or ending their trip in the SF Bay Area, is adding nine more Oakland flights tomorrow. You know you’re getting old when you can remember when Southwest was the no-frills cattle call airline.

Got to love marketing. On “Shout” stain remover it trumpets “Removes stains the 1st time or it’s free.” So since it’s not working on a stain (ink) I read the bottle carefully, find tiny print directing me to a website. A few more clicks, and ALL they need to send me $3.99 besides a lot of info is the cash register receipt from up to a year ago. Right, because we all save every receipt for potential under $4 windfalls….

In Saturday’s U.S. Virgin Islands, Hillary Clinton had a big win and picked up all seven pledged delegates. Wow. Okay, before this year, who even knew the U.S.V.I had a primary?

So we’ve got hockey, basketball and baseball going on now.  But as TC points out  after the Padres and Mariners split a pair in San Diego, 16-6 and 16-13: “When did the NFL preseason start?”