Posted tagged ‘Seattle jokes’

Leaving on a private jet plane?

July 6, 2016

Oklahoma City Mayor Mick Cornett, on Durant’s departure “We’re stunned…. We’ve been spurned by someone we cared deeply about.” “Tell us about it,” said every basketball fan in Seattle.

What’s more surprising at this point? That the SF Giants at 54-33 have the best record in MLB? Or that they have done it while blowing 17 saves.

Charles Barkley is now saying that Kevin Durant is jumping on the Golden State “gravy train” to win a ring. Hmm, so did the Warriors turn down Sir Charles’ offer to ride their bench to get himself a title?

This upcoming Summer Olympics has an official bug spray company. (OFF) Which kind of tells you all you need to know about Rio now.

Ashley Madison has now admitted that some women on its site were actually virtual computer programs. Who’d a thunk it – a website designed for cheaters, was operated by cheaters.

Bernie Sanders in a meeting with House Democrats today allegedly said “the goal is not to win elections.” Even Dennis Kucinich is thinking this guy may not quite be in touch with reality.

Ben Carson tweeted “Social media provides a great platform for discourse, but we must be careful with the messages we send out.” Yep, someone’s definitely not on Trump’s VP list….

Tennessee Sen. Bob Corker took himself off Trump’s VP short list today. This is like “the Bachelor-Bachelorette”, but with many of the contestants just saying no to the rose.

Former Fox News host Gretchen Carlson is suing Roger Ailes for sexual harassment. So how long until they make fun of her on Fox and Friends

In the UK they have spent 7 years and millions of pounds on the “Chilcot” report, probing the reasons that Britain joined the US in the Iraq war. The 2.6 million word report found that Tony Blair used “exaggerated” evidence to convince the British public that Saddam Hussein had WMDs, evidence that was “presented with a certainty that was not justified.”
But of course none of this is an important as Hillary’s emails.

 

Hour long delay for thousands of passengers on trains in and out of San Francisco due to moron in car trying to beat train across tracks.  He lost. But only damaged car. Alas, no Darwin.

Bob Corker, who still supports Trump but withdrew from V.P consideration “His best running mate, by the way, would be Ivanka.”
So is it required for a Trump supporter to be creepy?

You really cannot make this “stuff” up. Paul Ryan says Hillary Clinton was “reckless” in handling classified materials, so she should be denied access to classified materials during the general election.
Right, as opposed to the completely un-reckless GOP nominee?

From Bill Littlejohn “With the signing of Kevin Durant, the Warriors have more expectations than anything outside of a fertility clinic..”

Advertisements

The lights weren’t out, the party wasn’t over.

January 19, 2015

Some say God wanted the Seahawks to win. But isn’t it as likely that God was rooting for the Packers and just turned to the Colts-Patriots figuring the game was over?

The ending of the NFC championship was bad enough Packers fans are getting sympathy cards from Cubs fans.

Quite a number of Seahawks fans actually left with a few minutes left in the game.   Suppose that’s better than all the Packers who didn’t show up in the fourth quarter.

 

Considering how popular both the  ‪#‎Patriots‬ and ‪#‎Seahawks‬ are wonder how many Americans will fast-forward through ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ to get to commercials

 

Will the ‪#‎Seahawks‬ vote ‪#‎Bostick‬ a ‪#‎SuperBowl‬ playoff share?

 

In “prop bets” though,  who had Russell Wilson getting his first completion of the day with less than four minutes less in the second quarter?  And who had him completing more passes in the first half to the Packers than the Seahawks?

The NFL  warned Marshawn Lynch that if he had worn gold cleats Sunday as he planned, he would have been ejected from the NFC championship game. Good to see the league once again focusing on what’s important.

Not a Seahawks fan, but if the problem with Lynch’s gold cleats was that they might have been a distraction, why weren’t the Oregon Ducks’ uniforms declared illegal most weeks.

Meanwhile, TC asks “Did anyone notice that Jim Nantz and Phil Simms were not wearing “Bose” headsets? That has to be a $50,000 fine at least from the NFL! EACH!!!!!”

 

Indianapolis reporter Bob Kravitz tweeted “Breaking: A league source tells me the NFL is investigating the possibility the Patriots deflated footballs Sunday night. More to come.” He added that “no one is suggesting this is why Colts lost” but if true the story will just add to New England’s lovable reputation.

 

On a brighter note, at least the Colts didn’t break their fans’ hearts in the 4th quarter.

First Jim Tomsula. Now rumors have the 49ers looking at Lane Kiffin as an offensive coordinator. And in from Ann Arbor you can almost hear a new resident giggling.

And one thing about Lane Kiffin, he’ll have the “offensive” part down pat.

 

Tony Verna, 81, the inventor of instant replay for sports on TV, has passed away. At his funeral, wonder how many times they will review his life?

FOX News apologized four times Saturday for recent incorrect information about Muslims in Europe- things like more than half the Muslims in France supporting ISIS, Sharia law superseding local law, there being “no-go” zones etc. Less shocking that people on FOX said these things perhaps, then that they apologized for them.