Archive for January 2019

Much too young to feel this damn cold….

January 31, 2019

Jack McKeon, 88, has been hired as a senior adviser for the Washington Nationals.  Good for McKeon.  But at 88, isn’t “senior advisor” redundant?

Kentucky Governor Matt Bevin says it was “soft” for schools to close due to cold.
So why didn’t he give that Press Conference outside?

Okay, here’s an idea for positive NFL change. Besides adding limited PI review, which the CFL does, let’s talk about targeting and helmet-to-helmet.
The league already reviews plays and fines players, as they did after Saints-Rams. But make, AFTER REVIEW AFTER THE GAME- deliberate helmet-to-helmet/targeting a defenseless receiver an infraction that means unpaid suspension for the next game. Even if the playoffs or Super Bowl.
If safety is REALLY the goal that will make anyone think twice.

US State Department raised its Venezuela travel advisory warning for US citizens to “do not travel.”
With all due respect, is there any American who WANTS to travel to Venezuela right now?

Mitch McConnell said today that making Election Day a federal holiday is part of a “power grab” by Democrats to win elections.
Right, because heaven forbid in a democracy we make it easier for people to you know, actually vote.

As a moderate Democrat, I disagree with AOC on several policy issues. But am in awe of her social media skills – Today’s tweet -“Why don’t people ever tell billionaires who want to run for President that they need to “work their way up” or that “maybe they should start with city council first”?

Sarah Sanders: God “wanted Donald Trump to become president.”
God, “Don’t blame me, heck, I can’t even get a lousy targeting penalty called when SAINTS are involved.

 

 

Okay, if GOP doesn’t want Election Day to be national holiday in theory over cost, it would be inexpensive & effective to give all voters a lottery ticket.

On Morning Joe, Howard Schultz was surprised because while he said “I don’t eat Cheerios,” when Mika Brzezinski told him an 18 ounce box cost $4, he responded “That’s a lot.”
Right, about 2/3 of the price of an equivalent sized Starbucks latte.#NotTheOnion

At least seven people have died due to cold temperatures in the Midwest. Following his California comments waiting for Donald Trump to say it was their fault.for not shoveling their walks or something.

For the attack by his neighbor, Rand Paul was awarded more than $580,000 in expenses and damages. How many Americans are starting GoFundMe pages for the neighbor?

Have to wonder, at some point does  Donald Trump think about fact that if he hadn’t run for President he could be spending this whole Polar Vortex winter at Mar-A-Lago with Playboy bunnies and porn stars?

 

Serious final note –  Frank Robinson is reportedly in hospice care. 2019 so far kind of sucks.

Robberies

January 30, 2019

For those who say “get over it” with the Saints being robbed by refs- the Patriots also had an early lead – 14-0 at halftime, “let” KC come back, and ended up facing 3rd and 10 early in OT on their own 35. Imagine if a Chiefs defender had decked Edelman, PI, helmet-to-helmet and no call.
New England would have punted, and Kansas City, since Mahomes was dialed it, probably would have won. But I am sure Patriots fans would be “over it.”

San Antonio Spurs get a home win with a buzzer beater from Rudy Gaby, 126-124 over the… Phoenix Suns?!?   Speaking of being robbed,  Spurs coach Gregg Popovich

“I thought that they outplayed us, outcoached us, outphysicaled us, outexecuted us. We had no respect for them or for the game. We didn’t play with each other. It was a pathetic performance, and Phoenix got robbed.”

 

While we were focused on hamberders…. According to reporter Michael Harriott, at Trump’s Clemson fast-food dinner “”15 of the University’s black players listed on the school’s official roster attended the White House visit, the vast majority of whom (11) were freshmen or sophomores who had very little playing time during the season. Just one senior made the trip and only six of the players in attendance were even listed on Clemson’s national championship depth chart. There are at least 57 black student-athletes on Clemson’s official team roster, which means 74 % of Clemson’s African-American players chose not to make the trip to the White House..”

In California, Ghirardelli and Russell Stover have to pay over $750,000 in fines for “oversized containers” that “mislead” consumers into thinking they were getting more candy than they are actually buying.

This does not bode well this Easter for makers of hollow chocolate bunnies.”

A 56 year-old man is facing felony charges after allegedly stealing pills he thought were opioids. They were actually laxatives. (Where? Of course, Florida.)
But talk about a sh*tty story.

Wistful at the thought that with Polar Vortex this week comedians could have been falling all over each other to come up with the best “President Hillary Clinton is cold” joke.

Donald Trump says he will give a Super Bowl pregame interview on Sunday.
Yet another reason for Saints fans not to watch the game.

 

After allegations of knowing hiring illegal workers and helping them falsify document, apparently Donald Trump’s companies will start using E-Verify. – which Trump has touted in some speeches.
Translation, until they got caught, they saw no reason to change business as usual.

Howard Schultz toying with running for President might be doing as much for the Starbucks brand as “New Coke” did for Coca Cola.

 

Howard Schultz, a life-long Democrat, is trying to explain why he would run for President as an Independent. But really, there’s only one reason – because he has no chance to win Democratic primary.

 

 

Don’t touch

January 28, 2019

Nickell Robey-Coleman, Los Angeles CB whose illegal hit on Saints TommyLee Lewis sent Rams to Super Bowl is now saying age is starting to affect Tom Brady’s play. Wait until LA figures out that touching Brady and often his receivers, is an automatic 15 yard penalty

Phonetically # should be pronounced “Super Bowl Lie.” Coincidence?

Tom Brady says there is zero chance he will retire after this season. Translation – Giselle doesn’t want him around the house.

 

American creativity is not dead. Nor is #WhoDat spirit  https://www.facebook.com/groups/164795546974540/

 

On a lighter sports note, just watched movie “Secretariat” again. Forget NFL, MLB, NBA arguments etc…. we are talking serious GOAT. #31lengths

Saying that animals need to be full grown, United Airlines has banned puppies and kittens as “emotional support animals.”
But actually aren’t ALL puppies and kittens emotional support animals?

Howard Schultz somehow feels he needs to run as an independent because it would be absolutely impossible for a billionaire with no political experience to get a major party’s nomination?  WTF?

 

Okay Howard Schultz, you have “seriously considered” running for President.
Now time to say “After serious consideration this idea stinks more than when my baristas accidentally burn coffee.”

Simple math. 30-35% of Americans would still support Trump if he shot someone on 5th Avenue. A third party party candidate only needs about 10-15% of the rest to ensure Donald’s re-election.  50% before you factor in Greens, Libertarians and people who write in their pets, is not enough in an electoral college universe.

Trump is applauding Bible study in schools. Uh, about those commandments, including coveting thy neighbor’s wife. “I did try & f*ck her. She was married. I moved on her like a bitch…”

 

Sarah Sanders “The President doesn’t want to go through another shutdown.”
So I guess she ran out of burnt facts for her eyeliner?

Sticking by the Bay

January 27, 2019

RIP Peter Magowan, 76, former managing-partner of the SF Giants.   Though younger fans may not remember, he was one of the people most responsible for keeping that team that plays in the monstrosity called Tropicana Field from being the Tampa Bay Giants.

(Ironically, he was due to be honored this year, and the Giants’ opening day opening at now… ugh, Oracle Pack – are the Tampa Bay Rays.)

Gregg Popovich angrily called a timeout 16 seconds into tonight’s Spurs game, after the Wizards scored an easy bucket. San Antonio ended up winning 132-119.
Can’t win a game in 1st quarter, but Pop knows…sometimes you can lose it.

Golden State Warriors look so good with five all-stars healthy now about only thing that could stop them is Bill Vinovich’s crew officiating the NBA finals.

Tampa Bay Rays announced that Tropicana Field will become first cash-free sports venue in North America. Wonder if the team got approval from both of their season ticket holders?

So on Monday hundreds of thousands of federal employees will return to work for first time in over a month, after being given only a few hours notice before the shutdown.
And you think the leftovers in YOUR office fridge are scary.

Another mass shooting in US, this time in Louisiana. Suspect again is young white man. Wonder if Trump has his staff look into all these killings in hopes one was committed by an immigrant.

Not even that Kamala Harris is my first choice. But already seen Twitter attacks on her over Willie Brown – not from MAGAers but Bernie supporter

 

Can I go on record as saying as long as underage boys or girls, or rape, aren’t involved, I really don’t care who the Democratic nominee has slept with?

Open note to Democrats wanting to be elected President in 2020 – how about showing us what you can do to help save the country from Trump in 2019?

Grounded.

January 26, 2019

Poor Donald Trump had he only kept Shutdown long enough to close down Atlanta airport next weekend for Super Bowl he’d at least been guaranteed in 2020 to win Louisiana.

ESPN’s Adam Schefter reports that Robey-Coleman was fined $26,739 for helmet-to-helmet hit on Saint’s Tommylee Lewis.
Even the loser’s share of Super Bowl is over $55,000.
Going forward NFL doesn’t think players can figure the math?

Disgruntled Pittsburgh WR Antonio Brown apparently wants to join SF 49ers. And hey, what says winning with class more than player who sits out last game of year with playoff implications because he’s feuding with his quarterback?-

Imagine if Barack Obama had shut down the government over Mitch McConnell not scheduling a vote on Merrick Garland.

 

Trump agrees to reopen government without funding for his wall, but adds “As everyone knows, I have a very powerful alternative but I’m not going to use it at this time.”
Translation, I’m not going to declare a national emergency until I know Mueller is ready to release his report.

Who knew that the most powerful people in America are air traffic controllers?

 

 

Nixon Foundation – Calling Roger Stone “a Nixon campaign aide or adviser is a gross misstatement.”
So yes, we have a new answer for the GOP in “how low can you go?”#DisownedByNixon

Apparently Roger Stone was arrested by furloughed FBI agents working without pay.
Some statements don’t even need a punchline.

Trump is upset that CNN just happened to be there when Roger Stone was arrested. Gosh, and who’d a thunk any furloughed FBI agent might have had any incentive to alert the media?

Thinking “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”, which IS marvelous, is almost like “Dirty Dancing.” Except if Baby found that being funny was as good as finding a hot guy to get her out of her corner.

Your reminder that while none of Obama’s campaign staff, lawyers and confidants were arrested, while he was President, Barack DID wear a tan suit.

At least some consistency.

January 24, 2019

As crazy as this world these days, at least there is some consistency.  ESPN devoting headlines after opening round at the Farmers Insurance Open to Tiger Woods… eight shots off the lead.

 

Now former SF Giants pitcher Hunter Strickland has signed with the Seattle Mariners. So just imagine how mellow he’ll be now that he’ll be in America’s most caffeinated city.

Apparently ticket prices for Super Bowl have dropped by 17 percent since Sunday’s conference championship games – a “worst-case” demand scenario because Patriots have gone 4 times already and Rams fan base isn’t that interested.
Womp womp.

 

Maybe some of the big acts who refused to play Super Bowl halftime show should consider a charity concert during the game in New Orleans.

Look, nothing’s going to change with Rams Saints game result, even though petition is up over 750,000 signatures.
But at a time when NFL routinely acknowledges mistakes after the fact, along with suspensions and fines for targeting, absolute crickets from the league office. Not even a slap on the wrist for Nickell Robey-Coleman who BRAGGED about it again on Monday

Trump “The grocery store will float you the food on credit until the shutdown is over. That’s how it works.”
And George H.W. Bush was lambasted for not knowing how a grocery store scanner worked? WTAF?

So will Trump Hotel in DC let all furloughed federal employees put meals and drinks on account?

What’s tomorrow, Trump will say furloughed workers will can have all the groceries they want, and Mexico will pay for them.

Interesting that even in the middle of an acrimonious shutdown, Speaker Pelosi refers to him as “President Trump” where he refers to her as “Nancy.” But Democrats need to be more civil.

 

Trump “Many of those people that are not getting paid are totally in favor of what we’re doing.”
Would he like to trot some of those people out at a Press Conference? Or are they too busy standing in food bank lines?

Southwest Airlines just announced govt shutdown means their planes can’t be certified for over-water travel and thus has delayed their plans to offer scheduled flights to Hawaii starting this winter. And the delay could be months.

Waiting for Trump to say he doesn’t care about foreign travel.

Many national parks are in Red States, & small businesses who cater to those parks – motels, restaurants, gift shops, etc, are REALLY hurting with the Trump Shutdown. But it’s okay because they’ll get back pay too. Oh wait, never mind.

From USA Today – an “on again off again” Indiana girlfriend of Sun Trust Bank killer “I never understood where it started. For some reason (he) always hated people and wanted everyone to die.”
She said he bought a gun last week, but that she and others had shrugged it off because he always liked firearms.”
Right, and who would think an angry young white man would be dangerous?

All of a kind

January 24, 2019

Give him points for honesty. A-Rod on Clemens and Bonds and the Hall of Fame. “Of course I want them to get in, because that would mean that I have an opportunity to get in one day,”

As New Orleans fans plan Super Bowl boycotts and keep signing a petition in protest of Sunday’s missed call that gave Rams the NFL Championship Game win, interesting to note in LOS ANGELES, more viewers watched the Chiefs-Patriots game than the Rams-Patriots.

(Btw, the petition won’t change anything, but it will upset Roger Goodell —   so please feel free to share and add your name, over 700,000 as of tonight.  https://www.change.org/p/we-want-an-nfc-championship-rematch-sunday-jan-27-after-refs-missed-call)

 

Don’t have to look picture to know suspect in latest mass shooting in Sebring, Florida is a white man. Donald Trump hasn’t tweeted about it.

 

According to his FB page, suspect in Sebring Florida shooting, with at least 5 dead, is a fan of both Milo Yiannopoulos and Alex Jones.
So where is GOP outrage on how he was radicalized?

About building that wall to stop crime. Don’t suppose it would be possible to recreate that cask of amontillado story in the White House…?

In one sentence from Nancy Pelosi: “There is serious and justified concern that this president would shut down the government any time he does not get his way legislatively. That is why we must hold the line on this shutdown.”

 

Can Secret Service tell Donald Trump no one is now available to inspect his fast food and thus for safety reasons he can’t have any hamburgers until shutdown is over?
Government would be open tomorrow.

For that matter, so how quickly would the shutdown end if military pilots who are taking Melania to and from Mar-A-Lago tell Trump it’s not safe to fly?

Fox News claims “a poll finds a slim 51 % majority says Trump is responsible for the shutdown, while 34 % blame congressional Democrats.
17 points is “a slim majority?” Guess it’s the same math that says losing popular vote by almost 3 million is a landslide win.

Actually, if Donald Trump wants to give a SOTU speech on Hannity’s show, let him go ahead. But NO other network should cover it.

Trump SOTU statement basically tonight.
“If I can’t give it in the House, I will not give it with my spouse.
I will not give it in a box, I will not even go on Fox.”

and then

 

Build A Wall
Crime Will Fall.
Fooled you All
It’s About MY Haul
$$$

Moose!

January 22, 2019

Mike Mussina just elected to Baseball Hall of Fame. About time. Go Stanford.

Chiefs have fired their defensive coordinator after loss to Patriots on Sunday. Well, of course, he neglected to tell players they weren’t allowed to TOUCH Tom Brady.

Saints have been criticized a lot for play-calling and not going for 3 running plays before kicking a FB late in 4th, when Rams would have had it back with about a minute left. Actually the play calling was vintage Payton, going for the game-winning TD. Which looking at videos they would have had easily. …

More people in Los Angeles watched Chiefs-Patriots game than Rams-Saints.  Hope the Super Bowl doesn’t conflict with a Lakers game.

Now at least one airline warning “customers traveling from US airports may experience longer wait times than usual at security TSA checkpoints due to current US Govt. shutdown. We strongly recommend customers arrive at US airports at least 3 hrs before departure time of their flight.”
Are we great yet?

So now that the birthers have started in on Kamala Harris, suppose it would save time if Cory Booker brings a copy of his birth certificate with him when he announces he is running for President.

And now that Supreme Court has let Trump transgender military ban stand can’t wait to see all the MAGAers stampeding to recruiting offices to take transgender troops’ places.

As Senate prepares to vote Thursday on a bill to open government until Feb. 8 while working on border security funding, your reminder – with McConnell’s blessing and support, they passed “near-identical legislation on bipartisan lines before the shutdown began.”

So Donald Trump is insisting he still wants to do SOTU next week. Fine, why doesn’t he do it from real center of his government -Fox News Studios?

Trying to imagine if a liberal public school had organized a field trip for students to DC for the purpose of marching for abortion rights….

I’m so old I can remember that even the worst Winter or Spring break behavior from high school or college students didn’t require a PR firm.

 

 

Lara Trump to furloughed workers “It is a little bit of pain, but it’s going to be for the future of our country….”
So is she going to send them some lovely Trump branded cake to eat during the shutdown?

Screw dat

January 22, 2019

Not only did ref no-call screw Saints yesterday, also denied fans a chance for a GUARANTEED record breaking Super Bowl. Up until now oldest QB to win the game was Peyton Manning, 39. Brees is 40, Brady 41.

Your reminder that the NFL, a multi-billion dollar operation, still uses part-time officials.

Referee Bill Vinovich who chose not to flag Rams’ Robey-Coleman for PI or helmet-to-helmet works most of the time as certified public accountant. Wonder if he pays the same careful attention to tax returns?

Who knew that answer to “Who Dat say Gonna Beat Dem Saints?” was the refs?

NFL apparently spoke to Sean Payton on the phone less than an hour after the game and admitted that should have been a pass interference.
Well, hey, not like it was game changing or anything.

Has anyone told the Rams that not only can they not get away with pass interference during the Super Bowl, it’s roughing the passer if they get close enough to muss up Tom Brady’s hair.

 

I’m so old I remember having a President who spent MLK day volunteering in DC soup kitchens, instead of rage tweeting from his bedroom.

(and the same President who wants to be known for creating Space Force  was in his bedroom last night rage tweeting during a full lunar eclipse.)

Look, we all know if MLK Jr. was alive today Donald Trump would have given him a nasty nickname and attacked him as a radical leftist.

Trump did visit MLF  Memorial day in DC today for about 2 minutes, and said not a word about Martin Luther King Jr. At least he didn’t give a speech about himself.

Rudy Giuliani told Fox News today that his team & Robert Mueller’s “communicated” about Cohen-Trump BuzzFeed News article and “agreed a significant portion of it was false.”

And why should anyone doubt anything Rudy says?

 

Fox News pundit Mark Levin… “I keep hearing it’s day 29 of the government shutdown. It’s amazing how we count weekends, Christmas, New Year’s, Martin Luther King’s birthday on Monday as the government shutdown.”
Right, because nobody has to eat or pay bills on weekends and holidays.”

Trump claiming Nancy Pelosi thinks walls are immoral. Uh no, Pelosi didn’t say all walls are immoral – she said YOUR proposed wall was “immoral, ineffective and expensive.”
And Nancy is right.

A picture is worth a thousand words?

January 21, 2019

missedcall

Getting up to ramming speed?

January 20, 2019

Thinking in spirit of the city, New Orleans residents should deliver one big gooey filled King Cake to each member of Los Angeles Rams tonight. And challenge them to eat every bite before the game.

 

Lakers hoped to keep James Harden under 50 tonight.   Well, even in overtime – mission accomplished. And it was about as successful as George W. Bush’s version.  Los Angeles 134, Houston 138.

Uh, for a reaction to this Trump quote, paging Spurs coach Gregg Popovich (and have him bring a map)
“Everybody knows that walls work. You look at different places, they put up a wall, no problems. You look at San Antonio, you look at so many different places. They go from one of the most unsafe cities in the country to one of the safest cities immediately, immediately”

Covington Catholic — per Wikipedia the “only all-male high school in northern Kentucky. Maybe not coincidence it’s located on “Dixie Highway.”

But Rogers and Hammerstein were right  “You have to be carefully taught.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAZ8yOFFbAc

 

 

Today is 15th anniversary of Howard Dean scream. You know, when Americans decided a man who sounded like that was too emotional and unhinged to be President.

No sympathy at all for furloughed federal Federal Workers in Trump speech. Guess he figures they can all ask their parents for a little million dollar lo

Considering Donald  Trump has his own plane, wouldn’t it have been nice gesture to send Melania on it to Mar-A-Lago this weekend, instead of spending taxpayer dollars for military jet while federal worker are lining up at food banks?

Your reminder that while trashing Buzzfeed, Donald Trump yesterday acknowledged the greatness of Robert Mueller. “A very sad day for journalism, but a great day for our Country!”

 

Finally, once again, mention of the California police officer killed by an undocumented immigrant. But crickets on officer Natalie Corona, 23, from a Mexican immigrant family, ambushed and murdered by a white man.
F*ck you, Donald Trump

Countdown to kickoffs.

January 19, 2019

Kansas City fans – We hope Mahomes can end our 49 year Super Bowl drought.
Boston fans – We really are the underdogs, promise. In fact, they should deflate our footballs to make it more fair.
New Orleans fans – Sorry, what, we can’t hear you? Who Dat! Who Dat! Who Dat!
Los Angeles fans – Is there a big game this weekend? Is Lebron back?

Weather forecast in Kansas City this Sunday night for the Chiefs Patriots game has improved from near zero to temperatures in the 20s. Gosh, by Midwest winter standards that’s practically shorts weather.

Another Southwest plane slid off the runway today. Fortunately no injuries but never thought “Wanna Get Away” meant getting off the tarmac.

Apparently 376 Central Americans have just requested asylum after crossing US border in Arizona through tunnels. So yeah, about that wall.

Over 10,000 furloughed federal employees have now applied for food stamps. And sadly some of them are probably at the US Dept of Agriculture that oversees food stamps.

School where Karen Pence teaches doesn’t just forbid LBGT students, they reserve “right to expel student if they, their parents, or someone in their household engages in homosexual or bisexual activity, or supports or condones that behavior.” “Supports or condones that behavior?” What, like playing Elton John music?”

Got it, so Donald Trump only hires “the best people” but they become weak and stupid liars after they quit or he fires them.

New Trump rule. “Under no circumstances during a government shutdown will any government owned, rented, leased or chartered aircraft support any Congressional delegation, without the express written approval of the White House Chief of Staff.”

But FLOTUS needing a spa weekend, THAT’s essential.

Why Saturday for Trump important announcement? Does he know that even his cult member don’t want their football games interrupted? Or is he trying to end shutdown so Melania can avoid criticism when she takes a government plane back from her Florida spa weekend.

Democrats have now passed 9 separate bills to open government. Just saying.

Your reminder that the 9 bills Democrats have passed to open the government are almost the same bills the GOP-led Senate passed UNANIMOUSLY before Christmas.

Boogie nights

January 18, 2019

DeMarcus Cousins to join Golden State Warriors this weeekend. Just in time to heat up the NBA Preseason.

 

Washington Wizards beat the NY Knicks Thursday in London 101-100.
As if Britain doesn’t have enough to worry about with Brexit issues think NBA could have sent them two real professional teams?

Phil Mickelson, 48, shot a 12-under 60 in the Desert Classic Thursday tying his career low. Hope this is a good omen for that youngster Drew Brees, 40 on Sunday.

Does Michael Cohen have good security and a food taster? Asking for a country.

Marriott is changing the name of their frequent guest programs to “Bonvoy.” “Bonvoy?”
And just think, someone got paid millions of dollars to come up with that….

 

As the Trump shutdown continues, one group not asking why Nancy Pelosi isn’t giving in to appease Donald is women who’ve ever had a toddler. (Because we know – give into one tantrum, and worse ones follow.

 

On the same day Trump canceled Nancy Pelosi’s congressional delegation trip to Afghanistan,  he sent Melania in an Air Force Jet to Mar-A-Lago.

 

That last line doesn’t even need a punchline. But presumably with cake for local residents to eat?

 

That moment when Donald Trump’s personal attorney reportedly paying to rig pools in Trump’s favor is only 2nd biggest bombshell story involving Michael Cohen today.

 

Sigh, posted on Twitter that Nancy Pelosi couldn’t go commercial as a government employee because no US airliner flies to Kabul.
Some MAGAer snarkily sent me a screen shot showing Emirates Airline flights. Right, no US airline, which government employees are supposed to take. But hey, why let laws get in the way of supporting a good tantrum.

 

 

I’m so old I remember waking up and not even giving a thought to what insanity President of the United States had done already this morning….

Masters scholar athletes?

January 17, 2019

Now former Alabama and Texas quarterbacks Jalen Hurts and Shane Buechele are the latest to have decided to enter the graduate transfer portal, which would allow them to play for their new universities next season.

Just once, I’d love to hear one of these guys announce what in graduate program they’re supposedly going to study.

-.
.

 

New Dodgers President of Business Enterprise Tucker Kain has some big ideas – including “night clubs and sports bars inside Dodger Stadium.”
Well, it might be one way to get fans to stay past the 7th inning.

Bill Belichick says he’s not concerned about the freezing weather expected in Kansas City for AFC championship. Well, and even if Patriots HAD played well enough for #1 seed, forecast is for snow and sleet in Boston this Sunday.

Interim Michigan State President John Engler was forced to say he’ll resign today after telling Detroit News that Nassar’s victims had been in the “spotlight” & are “still enjoying that moment at times, you know, the awards & recognition.”
How long until Engler gets offered a job in Trump White House?

Trump said he bought 1,000 hamburgers for Clemson football team, White House said it was more like 300. Does this mean he’s got 700 burgers stored in fridge to survive a long shutdown?

Possible major flooding expected with storms in California over next two days. How long until Donald Trump somehow blames the state for it?

 

Note to SF Bay Area drivers. Rushing across the train tracks as signals start flashing and crossing arms start coming down is never smart. Doing that when it’s raining hard with slick roads is Darwin Award material.

Trump tweets today that “radical Democrats are the party of open borders and crime” while his cult members in Senate vote against sanctions on criminal Russian oligarch Oleg Deripaska. #NotTheOnion

 

So with SOTU being possibly delayed does that mean White House can stop work on translating it from the original Russian?

Apparently Chris Christie’s new book eviscerates Jared Kushner. But really, did Jared ever think the man who shut down a bridge over a perceived slight would forget being kicked out of a role in Trump administration?
Womp womp.

 

 

We cannot find him in the House.
We cannot find him with his spouse.
We cannot find him in a chair
We cannot find him anywhere
#WheresMitch.

The Eagle has landed?

January 15, 2019

 

Eagles coach Doug Pederson said yesterday “Carson Wentz is the quarterback going forward.” Guessing Wentz might be forgiven for not being too unhappy New Orleans Saints came to beat Philadelphia last week?

Brandon Wimbush is transferring from Notre Dame to UCF “I am excited to announce that UCF has granted me an awesome opportunity to play my last year of collegiate football for their great University.”
Well, at least he isn’t even pretending it’s about academics.

So do hamberders go well with covfefe?

The official White House story is that Trump fed the Clemson team fast food because of the shutdown. Gosh, if there were only a hotel near the White House where Trump knew the catering staff….

British Parliament rejects PM Theresa May’s Brexit deal with the European Union – 432 votes to 202
Gosh, who knew a country could get a vote so wrong?

So maybe Britain can just do a mulligan and have the whole country revote on Brexit?
Millions of Americans wish they could do the same with 2016.

This 2020 election cycle is going to be tough for Donald Trump. So many women running for President, so little time to think of childish nicknames for them all.

Open note to IRS workers, if Donald Trump calls you back to work without pay it might be an understandable error to accidentally release his tax returns.

Surest sign things are not going well for Donald Trump? Fox News has headlines about another caravan again.

Historically Presidents have loved to visit children’s classrooms. Guess we can be sure though Donald Trump won’t visit the new school where Karen Pence will teach,  which bans LGBTs.  They don’t allow anyone guilty of “moral misconduct” – including “heterosexual activity outside of marriage (e.g., premarital sex, cohabitation, extramarital sex).”

Seriously, how hard would it be for Donald Trump to end the shutdown, declare he will privately fund the wall as a profit making operation and then lie about it being done?

 

From Marc Ragovin  “Now that Steve King has been stripped of his committee seats, he will probably announce his retirement to spend more time with his klan … I mean clan.”

Beyond Boston

January 15, 2019

Tom Brady  – “I know everyone thinks we suck “I know everyone thinks we suck and, you know, can’t win any games.”
Not quite Tom, everyone knows the Patriots can win football games. Most of them still think you guys suck. #cheaters

As Trump buys fast food for Clemson players, have to wonder, how many restaurants in DC are hurting big time now because furloughed federal workers aren’t eating lunch or stopping by after work?

 

A tanker carrying 20 TONS of liquid chocolate overturned near Flagstaff today, spilling its contents over the highway. All we need is a truck full of chilis for the world’s biggest mole party.

While Trump spoke in New Orleans today, originally he was confused and said he wsa going to Nashville. They both start with N. What’s the problem?

Trump praised Saints once he figured out he was in New Orleans & not Tennessee. Guess no one told Donald this comment last season about him from Sean Payton “I think we need a little more wisdom in that office. Seems like every time he’s opening his mouth, it’s something that is dividing our country & not pulling us together.”

Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul, who criticizes socialized medicine as much as anyone in Congress,, will travel to Ontario, Canada later this month to get hernia surgery.    Is this a stealth move to try to get Canada to build a wall to keep him there?

 

While Donald Trump rants about “Angel moms” & falsely limits them to moms whose children were killed by undocumented immigrants, your reminder he has still said NOTHING about police officer #NatalieCorona, 23, from a Mexican immigrant family, murdered by a white man.

 

When asked to comment on Steve King racist remarks, Donald Trump responded “I haven’t been following it.”
Translation: the story hasn’t been covered on “Fox and Friends.”

Donald Trump, ignoring his merit-based immigration claims from the past today to farmers – “people aren’t going to come, except for the people we want to come, because we want to take people in to help our farmers.”
Uh, one of the people he used as a racist dog whistle last fall was the killer of Mollie Tibbetts, who had been a reliable  and good – albeit undocumented – immigrant worker for four years in Iowa.

Former Trump campaign advisor, Barry Bennett who has a political consulting firm with Corey Lewandowski, about furloughed workers “It’s inconvenient that they’re not getting paid. But it’s for time they’re not even going into the office.”
So the question of the day “Evil? Or just amoral?”

 

Better marching in late than never?

January 14, 2019

Today’s 14-point New Orleans Saints comeback was the largest in the team’s playoff history. Of course, last year in Minnesota coming back from 17-0 would have been the record. Not, not still bitter.

Much talk of how Saints might have drafted Mahomes if KC hadn’t.   Yeah, Patrick was on the Saints raider. Right below the guy Sean Payton did draft, and said he wanted more – Marshon Lattimore.

Anyone else noticed time never goes as slowly as it does when your team has a 4th quarter lead.

As for the Chargers against Patriots, well, at least they helped cover the over.

Not a Cowboys fan, but Terrell Owens calling out coach Jason Garrett as “not the answer” after their loss to Rams yesterday.
Because TO knows all about winning a Super Bowl?

Jeanine Pirro asked Trump if he ever worked for Russia.
“I think it’s the most insulting thing I’ve ever been asked.”

Uh, wasn’t there a possible one word answer?

Lots of snow in DC. Hope it doesn’t shut down the government.

A 21-year-old man playing hide-and-seek in an abandoned building in Detroit with friends died last night when he ran to hide and fell down an elevator shaft.
Let me guess, alcohol might have been involved. #DarwinAward

Lindsey Graham complaining about New York Times story on alleged FBI probe of Donald Trump after he fired Comey, “That story came from somebody who leaked it with an agenda.”
That’s like blaming Deep Throat for Watergate

Now Trump tweeting that “Border is eventually going to be militarized and defended or the United States, as we have known it, is going to cease to exist.”
Uh, in many ways the United States, as we have known it, has ceased to exist since Donald moved into White House.
I miss having a President.

More from Trump tweet storm “Best line in the Elizabeth Warren beer catastrophe is, to her husband, “Thank you for being here. I’m glad you’re here” It’s their house, he’s supposed to be there!”
Uh, where’s Melanie?  (sic)

And the doinks just keep on coming

January 13, 2019

Did Adam Vinatieri suddenly get 10 years older in the past week?

 

Lawrence Taylor reportedly sent prostitutes to his opponents’ hotel rooms before big games

Thinking on a more PG level  Saints  fans should be hospitable hosts and send King Cakes to Eagles’ hotel rooms tonight. Lots of big King Cakes with gooey icing, maybe pecan and cream-cheese filled too.

Okay, who had Colts scoring first TD in 2nd quarter, before they had a 1st down?

And is there a football magnet on the goal posts this year?

So the Arizona Cardinals just hired Kliff Kingsbury, who couldn’t win at Texas Tech with Patrick Mahomes?

Alabama sophomore DE LaBryan Ray was arrested last night in Tuscaloosa for alleged public intoxication. Just how drunk do you have to be as a Crimson Tide player to be arrested in Alabama for it?0And so does Putin claim Trump as a dependent on his tax returns?

If Mitch McConnell would simply allow Senate to VOTE on the same bill they passed unanimously in December, then we’d at least know what side all Senators are on with the shutdown.

Five killed so far in Winter Storm Gia crashes in Kansas and Missouri. By Trump logic should the states be blamed for not clearing the roads and letting people drive in the snow?

At times like this with bombshells about Trump rvealed by Washington Post and NY Times, it is important to remember that Barack Obama once wore a tan suit.

Trump may have gotten rid of records from his private meeting with Russia’s leader. But I’ll bet Putin kept his.

 

 

California police officer Ronil Singh, 33, fatally shot by an illegal immigrant, tweeted about and eulogized repeatedly by Donald Trump.
Natalie Corona, 23, fatally shot by a white man with a battery conviction, and crickets.
Sad, and pathetic.

Did he kneel?

January 11, 2019

Tim Tebow is engaged. So guess he’s finally been completing his passes.

 

Two-years, $20 million for Jed Lowrie, 34, with Mets. Nice deal. And maybe at his age Lowrie is tired of dealing with playoff pressure?

Congratulations to Gregg Popovich, now #3 on all-time NBA coaching wins list.  The Spurs this year have EIGHT new players on their roster and no real point guard. It is just possible Pop is GOAT coach.

And 56 points from Lamarcus Aldridge and an NBA record 84% (16-19) on 3-pointers, and 154 points in double OT.  Just like everyone expected for the second game of a back-to-back.

 

Unidentified person reportedly decapitated by a helicopter at a small Florida airport. The local sheriff called it “a “very serious aircraft accident.”
I think I prefer- a serious Darwin winner.

Iowa GOP Rep Steve King -“White nationalist, white supremacist… how did that language become offensive?”
But hey, a Democratic woman Rep. called Trump a “motherf*cker” and another woman danced. #priorities

 

Someone registered officialsecuretheborderfund.com

Worth a click.

If Donald Trump wants to prove Democrats are lying about meetings why doesn’t he just televise all meetings he has with them?

 

 

So the Stable Genius who knows everything about everything also claims he had no idea what his personal lawyer and campaign manager were doing?

Lindsey Graham says “We’re stuck, I don’t see a way forward” about this shutdown.
Uh, Senator, how about passing the SAME bill you passed in December, which the Democrats have passed in January?

 

A police officer was shot and critically injured in Davis tonight. No comment from Donald Trump – and no doubt there won’t be. Unless it turns out shooter was undocumented.

Trump fundraiser of the day:
“Look at just a few examples of what the Liberal Elites had to say about the Presidential Address:
Jim Acosta: “Trump address hazardous to the truth.”
Jimmy Kimmel: “Rarely does a president of the United States interrupt primetime television to warn us about a completely made up thing.”
Chuck Schumer: “This president just used the backdrop of the Oval Office to manufacture a crisis.”

Now look at what hard-working American patriots like you said:
Jackie from Georgia: “Mr President. I back you 1000%.”
Grace from Colorado: “I love you Sir!! You are such a blessing to our Country and I cannot thank you enough! I pray for you every day! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”
Ed from Michigan: “Great explanation on the the southern border keep it up God bless you sir.””

Wonder if Jackie, Grace and Ed are names he gives those voices in his head?

That’ll teach him?

January 10, 2019

Clemson DT Dexter Lawrence, who was suspended indefinitely over PEDs and missed Tigers’ postseason games, has announced he will leave early for 2019 NFL draft. Makes sense, because in NFL a positive drug test only costs you 4 games.

 

Eight NFL head coaches fired, six white men – so far hired. How’s that “Rooney Rule” working out?

More from our well-regulated militia:  A former LSU offensive lineman lost a leg in a duck hunting incident after his dog reportedly jumped on his gun and, the weapon went off.    Well, dog-gone it.

 

SF Giants changing name from AT&T Park to Oracle Park. And it’s only a coincidence if fans suddenly end up with a major increased in dropped calls?

FDA issued recall notice for “Modjeskas” candy, sold by Kentucky company and QVC as it might be contaminated with Hepatitis A. Okay, MAGAers, you know what to do. Defy science, buy more of the candy and “own the libs.”

Trump argues we need wall to stop migrants driving right across in their “unbelievable vehicles… stronger, bigger, and faster vehicles than our police have, than ICE has” So Trump is TRYING to get more Americans to buy cars made in Mexico?

Maybe if someone told Donald Trump that until the shutdown is over, health inspectors won’t be able to vouch for the safety of his fast food orders…

Trump insists walls work.   But curiously a wall didn’t work to stop Dorothy, a tin man, scarecrow and lion.   Speaking of REALLY successful witch hunts…

 

Coast Guard suggested their employees consider a garage sale during their furlough. Hmm, or maybe some private sales of stuff they might happen to find on boats trying to sneak into the US?

So when the next hurricane destroys parts of Florida, Louisiana or Texas, will Trump withhold FEMA money until people stop building near the shoreline?

None of the headlines today seem to have real Trump Oval Office Tuesday speech message right. “My campaign manager shared political polling data with a business associate tied to Russian intelligence but I REALLY hope you won’t notice.”