Posted tagged ‘Rockies jokes’

Getting late early

August 31, 2016

Twitter just gave me the “Who to follow” suggestion of @NBCOlympics Makes sense, the suggestion is as delayed as everything else about this summer’s games.

 

#Rockies can’t hold 6 run lead after 8 innings against #Dodgers. On brighter note #SFGiants next week at Coors should never feel out of a game.

Congrats to #TyBlach,  the newest pitcher promoted to #SFGiants, leads PCL w/ 14 wins. May or may not have major league stuff. But now neither do Cain & Peavy

A’s traded #CocoCrisp to #Indians. Proving again most appropriate @Athletics bobblehead would have blank uniform & come with erasable pen.

Some talk that Colin Kaepernick is being attacked for his sitting down during the National Anthem because he is black, or at least bi-racial. Though have to think if Russell Wilson did it we’d be having a very different discussion.

 

Bleacher Report reporting that Colin Kaepernick has become persona non grata in the NFL.. One executive “In my career, I have never seen a guy so hated by front office guys as Kaepernick.”
Right, because he disrespected the flag. Murder, domestic violence, sexual assault, animal cruelty, those are all forgivable. #WTF?

 

On the other hand,  just guessing #MuhammadAli and #JackieRobinson would not wear socks featuring caps wearing police caps. #ColinKaepernick #WTF?

Congratulations to Rockies rookie Stephen Cardullo, who today on his 29th birthday got his 1st major league home run against the Dodgers in game 1, and a grand slam in game 2.
But maybe SFGiants pitchers might want to get some tape on him before heading to Coors next week.

Loved Dallas Braden on KNBR this morning, talking about Tebow trying to play MLB. He was talking about strength and size really not mattering in baseball – said Jose Altuve is a likely MVP and “he couldn’t get on rides at Disneyland.”

All of this outrage that donors to the Clinton Foundation might have done it to get access to the Clintons. As opposed to big campaign donors who give money to candidates out of the goodness of their hearts?

 

Yet another August 31 political fundraising email starting “I’m sorry to bother you twice on the same day…” Uh, no you aren’t, or you wouldn’t do it. #Justsayno

Donald Trump was off to Mexico before a speech tonight on immigration. And Hillary Clinton today is tweeting about the mental health crisis in America. Coincidence?

So while @realDonaldTrump was in Mexico did he try to teach them to make taco bowls as good as the ones in Trump Tower?

Why does everyone care so much about what Donald Trump said tonight about immigration.  No doubt he will probably will deny saying it tomorrow.

Trump on his meeting with Mexico’s President Nieto “We did discuss the wall. We didn’t discuss payment of the wall.” Well, with all those corporate bankruptcies this is probably the way the Donald is used to doing business.

Donald Trump “It’s our right as a sovereign nation to choose immigrants that we think are the likeliest to thrive and flourish and love us.” Spoken by a man who has chosen immigrants for two of his three wives.

 

Today Trump said “we discussed the wall, we did not discuss who would pay for the wall.” Then Nieto said “I made it clear that Mexico will not pay for the wall” Then Trump gave a speech saying Mexico would pay for the wall.
Maybe this is all preparation for the Donald’s next reality show “Dancing with the Truth.”

 

 

So is there a world leader @realDonaldTrump hasn’t insulted or accused of lying, besides #Putin?

A pikture is werth a thowsand werds.

July 26, 2014

jersey

The above picture is from Troy Tulowitzki jersey night at Coors Field.

(My friend Oscar B. says,   “What are they smoking in Colorado…?  Oops, never mind. )

But Colorado IS a purple state. So maybe spelling really is one of those commie pinko liberal concepts.

There’s a new reality show called “Dating Naked.” For all those who find “The Bachelor” and “Bachelorette” franchises too intellectual.

A Colorado man was arrested for DUI. On a lawn mower. The cops said he was bar-hopping. He says he was just cutting some weeds. Maybe more like looking for some weed?

As if women didn’t love George Clooney enough already. Quoted in People on his engagement to Amal Alamuddin:.”I’m marrying up.”

 

Jay Paterno, explaining why his dad didn’t want to “wrongly accuse” Jerry Sandusky despite multiple allegations “When you know somebody for so long, it’s awfully hard to believe bad things about someone, when every sign in his life points the other way.” “Every” sign?! Guess denial is genetic.

Carmelo Anthony told ESPN that his decision to return to the New York Knicks was about winning, and not about the five-year, $124 million contract. And then Melo left the interview to go back to work selling that bridge in Brooklyn.

Headline at “The Onion”  “Roger Goodell to NFL Players: Murdering your Wife Will Result in Automatic 4-Game Suspension. ”  Of course, it has to be satire. Because if you’re a star the suspension would be reduced to three games max.

 

So if the #SFGiants strategy is to lure the #Dodgers into a false sense of security before the trade deadline, the strategy is working.

#NBA considering 7 day All-Star Break next season. Why not cut season from 82 to 60 games and make it a 1 month break? #toolong

Rough night for #SFGiants pitching but hard to win when your only chance to score might have been on penalty kicks. #kershaw

Maybe it’s the curse of Will the Thrill. Uggla is wearing 22 #retire22 #SFGiants

 

Curt Clawson, a new GOP congressman, just assumed Nisha Biswal and Arun Kumar, two high level U.S. government officials, were from India. And told them what “their country” should do. Well, I suppose it could be worse. Clawson didn’t lecture them about Indian casinos.

A SWAT team stormed a passenger plane at Toronto airport because of an alleged threat. Shockingly, this threat did not involve Rob Ford.

Fox Sports says they will no longer be advertising with Entercom Communications Corp after Kevin Minhane, from their Boston station, blasted Erin Andrews with derogatory and sexist language after the All-Star game, and then blasted her again in his apology. So waiting for Stephen A. Smith to tell Erin Andrews not to provoke such insults?

For the anti-Stephen A. Smith, I give you Keith Olbermann “Eventually after all the b-words and ho comments and penis remarks and nudity demands and waitress jokes, the most powerful national sports league in the world can then get away with suspending a wife-beater for just two games….. The message to the women who the league claims constitute 50% of its fan base is simple. The NFL wants your money. It will do nothing else for you.”