Archive for August 25, 2012

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Small and large steps

August 25, 2012

Upon the death of Neil Armstrong, the U.K Guardian referred to the Apollo 11 moon landing as “the moment of greatness” that “defined the American century.” And looking forward? Well, Snooki is in labor.

 

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Armstrong’s death also reminds me of the quote attributed to Casey Stengel, about the truly awful 1962 New York Mets….that “man would walk on the moon before the Mets would win the pennant.

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The headlines say that Tom Cruise got off cheaply in only paying Katie Holmes 400,000 a month child support. Thinking Katie feels she got off cheap in only having to stay married to him five years.

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Joe Biden has cancelled his campaign visits to Florida due to the imminent arrival of Tropical Storm/Hurricane Isaac. Insert “more than enough blowing hot air”” joke here:

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An RV bearing the slogan “Who’s Your Daddy” is functioning as a mobile clinic doing DNA paternity tests in New York City. Wonder how long until they get a sponsorship deal with the NBA?

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At this point the extended NFL exhibition season has taken out more players than the Saints’ bounties.

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Roger Clemens, 50, tossed 3 1/3 scoreless innings for the Sugar Land Skeeters tonight, adding fuel to the rumors that he will pitch at some point this season for the Houston Astros. Although actually what Roger probably really wants is to pitch AGAINST the Astros.

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With their  trade with the Red Sox, the Dodgers have added another $261 million in payroll. Any truth to the rumor that Los Angeles’s 2013 uniforms will feature pinstripes?

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The Boston Red Sox are thrilled to have gotten rid of Josh Beckett. Republicans trying to figure out the process to put Todd Akin on waivers.

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Betty White said in an interview with People that her favorite foods are  “hot dogs and Red Vines and potato chips and French fries.  Maybe there’s something about those preservatives.

 

From Marc Ragovin:    Jennifer Garner recently referred to husband Ben Affleck as “walking testosterone.” In a related development, Affleck has announced that he is quitting acting to become the San Francisco Giants’ new left fielder. . . .

 

And an actual serious link below, though it might seem like a joke.  An op-ed from Charlie Crist, the former Republican governor of Florida.  Guess  there’s not any chance he’ll be a surprise speaker at the GOP convention.

 

http://www.tampabay.com/opinion/columns/obama-is-right-leader-for-our-times/1247631

 

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Down for the count?

August 25, 2012

You cannot make this “stuff” up: Lynyrd Skynyrd is performing at the GOP convention. The band’s latest album? “Last of a dyin’ breed.”

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Jerry Nelson, who voiced Count von Count on Sesame Street, has passed away. He was 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16….76, 77, 78 years old.

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Todd Akin said again today he is staying in the Senate race. I’m waiting for him to say his rape comment was a “legitimate” mistake.

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The Los Angeles Dodgers may get Josh Beckett, Carl Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez from the Boston Red Sox. Performance enhancing? Maybe. Payroll enhancing? Definitely.

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If Josh Beckett ends up with the Dodgers, Los Angeles will assume the two years and $31.5 million remaining on his contract. Wonder if that includes a beer and chicken stipend.

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My friend Michael passes on this tweet from an unknown source…”if Magic takes Beckett from Sox he will be more popular in Boston than Larry Bird”

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Houston owner Jim Crane said he was open to the idea of Clemens rejoining the team, even at the age of 50. Will Roger ever be a major league pitcher again? Probably not. But he might be good enough for the Astros’  rotation.

 

Wonder if the Tour de France is going to find the best “clean” rider to declare the winner for the years Lance Armstrong won. And if so does the kid still even have his his “Big Wheel?”

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Senior LB Storm Klein who was dismissed from Ohio State following a domestic violence charge, was reinstated by Coach Urban Meyer after pleading guilty to a reduced charge of misdemeanor disorderly conduct. And who saw that coming?
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Campaign quote of the day: “Big business is doing fine in many places. They know how to find ways to get through the tax code, save money by putting various things in the places where there are low tax havens around the world for their businesses.” Obama again? No, Mitt Romney, at a fundraiser.
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Mitt Romney campaigning in Michigan today said “No one’s ever asked to see my birth certificate.” True. But no one’s now asking to see Barack Obama’s tax returns.
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Bill “Spaceman” Lee, 65, got the win for the independent San Rafael Pacifics last night, and became the oldest pitcher ever to win a professional baseball game. And he still probably throws harder than Barry Zito.
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Footage has surfaced of Ryan Lochte with Prince Harry in Las Vegas. Not playing strip billiards, but having a 3am swimming race. Now that the video’s out, wonder if the hotel’s already cleaned the pool?
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