Posted tagged ‘Gary Stevens jokes’

Power (ball) failure?

May 18, 2013

Apparently if we really want to get voter turnout up in the US, all we need to do is offer voters a free #Powerball ticket.


But there was a Powerball winner tonight,  as the odds indicated this time because  most combinations were picked. And if most Americans understood the math of why that is unusual, they wouldn’t be playing in the first place.


(although as Michael Schilby points out..  A ticket is “cheaper than going to a Cubs game, and, if you’re a Cubs fan, more rewarding.”


One positive thing about Powerball, at least it’s made sure most Americans have learned to count to 59.


Was only six numbers off tonight’s #Powerball jackpot, and I didn’t even play.


So with about a month to go in the NBA finals, we’ve got teams from the major media markets left of San Antonio, Indianapolis, Memphis and Miami. The winner? Might be Major League Baseball.


#Oxbow won the #Preakness. Meaning the Belmont Stakes will now be about as much of a TV ratings success as the rest of #NBC’s lineup.



Not saying Oxbow’s jockey Gary Stevens is old, but rumor has it he had to rush to the track for the 6:18pm post time after finishing his Early Bird special dinner.


(Alex Kaseberg adds, that Stevens is so old,  “he left Oxbow’s right turn signal on the whole race.”)


Wow, never thought I’d type this: If the 2013 SF Giants could pitch and catch, they’d be dangerous.


In 2013, Notre Dame can qualify for a BCS bowl if they win 9 games and finish in the top 14 of the final BCS poll. But due to current contracts, if they win, say, 6-7 games the Fighting Irish, while bowl-eligible, might have to stay home. Oh the horror.


No one was injured when a US Airways Express flight had landing gear problems and ended up making a belly landing at Newark Airport airport last night. But standby for a “wheel maintenance fee.”

So will the main accomplishment of the Houston Astros moving leagues be keeping the LA Angels out of last place in the AL West?


Wouldn’t it be nice if Americans and the media got as up in arms about coming up with a fair and reasonable tax system as they did over whether some political groups were too closely scrutinized over what would be at best a questionable tax-exempt status?