Posted tagged ‘Canseco jokes’

Trading places

July 30, 2015

‪The New York Mets‬‘ Wilmer Flores cried on the field Thursday night thinking he was traded. But social media turned out to be wrong.  Wonder how many  Phillies‬ will cry Friday night realizing they HAVEN’T been traded.

A day after they had their shortstop in tears over a trade that didn’t happen, the Mets blew a 6 run lead and had to sit through four hours of rain delays in losing to the Padres 8-7. Maybe God doesn’t like crying in baseball.

Money money money money….. From the LA Times, with the trade of Hector Olivera, in 2015 alone, “the Dodgers would pay seven players — Olivera, Matt Kemp, Dan Haren, Dee Gordon, Brian Wilson, Brandon League and Ryan Webb — $80 million not to play for them. The Tampa Bay Rays had an opening-day payroll of $76 million”

The LA Dodgers did get Mat Latos. Well, it’s a good fit. He will show up for his first pitching appearance at AT&T Park with a ready made booing section. ‪#‎IhateSF‬ ‪#‎Theyhateyoutoo‬

Waiting for Mat Latos to say about his new team, we “went and changed our whole lineup, put guys with ‘Dodgers’ across their jerseys. Yeah, we did.”

(for those who don’t follow baseball, Latos complained loudly in 2010 that the SF Giants had made too many trades in their pursuit of his Padres. With almost the exact same words above.  And then he went out and lost some very big games to SF.)

Urban Meyer has suspended four players, including star DE Joey Bosa, for Ohio State’s first game against Virginia Tech, due to “violations of athletic department policy,”   Wow. So Meyer figure out a way to wait to suspend them until the Buckeyes’ second game against Hawaii?   The Hokies must not have much of a team this year.

Looks like there may finally be some sad closure for MH 370. Over at CNN they’re trying not to be too gleeful over the possibility of another month at least of “Special Reports.”

Jose Canseco says that to show his support for Caitlyn Jenner he “will be dressing up and living as a woman for a week,” And he will feature his week as a woman on his new internet show “Spend a Day with Jose.”

Canseco is not trying to be Caitlyn Jenner, he’s trying to be a Kardashian. ‪#‎publicitywhore‬

Many people are still stunned by the news that Patriots Tom Brady actually thought it was a good idea to destroy his phone. Of course, Brady didn’t have the option to hand it off to Marshawn Lynch.

A new Presidential election poll says Bernie Sanders would beat Donald Trump. Heck, Jed Bartlett would beat Trump. Come to think of it, what is Martin Sheen doing these days?

Now the U.S. Government is getting involved. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service tweeted today – “We’re investigating the killing of ‪#‎CecilTheLion‬. Will go where facts lead. We ask Dr. Palmer or his rep to contact USFWS immediately.”

As awful as the story is, maybe it will lead to changes. Certainly it’s got to be one of the few times when the Obama administration has at least 80% bipartisan agreement in this country.

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Okay, leaving aside the serious larger issues, have to wonder, how were the University of Cincinnati cops dumb enough both to KNOW the shooting of Samuel DuBose was on video tape with an audio, and still to think they’d get away with lying? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

And then there were more than four?

November 16, 2014

Best thing about only one SEC team in the top four of the college football rankings? Increases the chances of getting the playoff from 4 to 8 games sooner rather than later.

Although with all these upsets and near upsets, have to wonder, is college football trying to match the NFL for parity?

 

Original mantra from naysayers on climate change. “Well, China isn’t involved anyway, so what difference does it make?” New mantra “Well, it’s not like you could trust the Chinese anyway.”

 

Sad to say, but in the US more people are dying from frat parties than Ebola

 

The Charlotte Hornets’ Lance Stephenson drew a foul by hitting himself in the fact and flopping. Let’s hope Chris Paul and Blake Griffin didn’t see it.

#21 Duke was upset by Virginia Tech today 17-16, despite the Blue Devils’ having had several late scoring opportunities. So is Duke really trying to be the “Stanford of the East?”

 

Meanwhile Bruce Jenkins of the SF Chronicle on the Stanford-Utah game “Apathy met irrelevance at Stanford Stadium on Saturday, and by the finish, it didn’t seem to matter whether Utah or the Cardinal prevailed.” Yeah, just about sums it up.

So much for all those worries about Stanford coach David Shaw leaving for the NFL.

The Marlins signed Giancarlo Stanton to a 13 year $325 million contract. Presumably the idea is to win another World Series and then trade him and his contract to the Yankees?

Jose Canseco tweeted that he was playing in a poker tournament and “and something crazy happened to my finger that I shot off and they put back on….”  Apparently it fell off.   As Alex Kaseberg said “Talk about a bad hand.”

California’s Santa Clara County has only a few more thousand ballots to count, and they hope to be done by the weekend. Almost two weeks after the election. Ah, it’s good to live in the birthplace of the high tech industry.

 

From T.C.  “The world’s top ranked badminton player has failed a doping test. Badminton World Federation officials finally had to confront him when his serves reached speeds of 400 mph.”

T.C  also passes this on, “Heard on the radio, Charles Barkley can chow down now after saying he wouldn’t eat another meal until the Lakers won. I bet he wouldn’t dare try that with the Oakland Raiders.”