Left Coast Sports Babe

How can you not love the SF Giants’ Matt Duffy. Or at least his cat Skeeter?

It just gets better. Now Yankees COO Lonn Trost says he doesn’t like fans who paid retail selling tickets cheaply on sites like Stubhub: “It’s not that we don’t want that fan to sell it, but that fan is sitting there having paid a substantial amount of money for a ticket and (another) fan picks it up for a buck-and-a-half and sits there, and it’s frustrating to the purchaser of the full amount. And quite frankly, the fan may be someone who has never sat in a premium location. So that’s a frustration to our existing fan base.”
Clearly, they need a violin section to fill those premium empty seats….‪#‎thehumanity‬

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Coach Mike Krzyzewski says he will still coach the U.S. Olympic team, despite planned knee replacement surgery after the NCAA season is over. Hmm, thought the only active big name in basketball old enough for knee replacement surgery was Tim Duncan.

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Colts linebacker Jonathan Newsome was arrested near Indianapolis last night and JAILED over two counts of marijuana possession. Add another to the list of potential free agents who want to sign with the Denver Broncos.

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Adele said “‘I cried pretty much all day” after the Grammys. Maybe she can write a song about the experience.

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With this Apple/San Bernadino thing I think I’ve figured out many Americans’ approach to privacy – the government should do everything necessary to keep me safe, as long as it doesn’t involve my own personal information.

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The Tax Policy Center analyzed Ted Cruz’s proposed 10% flat tax and said not only would it favor the wealthy, but it would cost the country $8.6 trillion over a decade. Waiting for Cruz to respond that numbers have a liberal bias.

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Thinking Will Rogers never met ‪#‎DonaldTrump‬ or ‪#‎TedCruz‬.

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Pope Francis on Trump. “A person who thinks only about building walls, wherever they may be, and not building bridges, is not Christian,” Going to be fun now to see the Donald attack the Pope.

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Walmart is giving all their employees pay raises this year, so the average full-time worker will make $13.38. (about $25,000 a year.) Part-timers will get an an average hourly wage of $10.58. They say it will cost them $1.6 billion for their 1.4 million workers.
By comparison Walmart’s top 6 executives make a combined total of $76 million….

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After a DNA test, Bristol Palin has apparently conceded in a custody and support battle that former fiance Dakota Meyer is the father of her 2 month old daughter. So how many options were there? ‪#‎abstinenceambassador‬

Sandra Day O’Connor,  who thinks Obama should nominate a new Supreme Court judge, and the Senate confirm him or her. “We need somebody in there to do the job and just get on with it.”

Three words “You go girl.”

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As the conspiracy theories fly on Scalia, the Borowitz Report once again has it right: “The only suspect I have definitively ruled out is Mitch McConnell,” a leading conspiracy theorist said. “No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t imagine a scenario where he accomplished something.”

This entry was posted on February 18, 2016 at 11:06 pm and is filed under baseball jokes, GOP jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: Apple jokes, Cruz jokes, Janice Hough, Pope jokes, SF Giants jokes, spring training jokes, Trump jokes, Walmart jokes, Yankees jokes