Archive for April 27, 2015

Oh say can you speed it up?

April 27, 2015

While MLB is focusing on pace-of-game issues, maybe they should consider also fining National Anthem singers who add several syllables to one-syllable words?

 

The NFL draft is Thursday. DE Shane Ray, a probable first round pick, was cited early this morning in Missouri for a traffic violation and marijuana possession. So should part of the job for a really good sports agent be to lock these kids in a room for the week prior to the draft? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

A Fox News poll found that 51% of Americans say to legalize marijuana, and 48% say to legalize gay marriage. Of course, with legalized marijuana the same-sex marriage tolerance might go up “Whatever, dude, will they offer me some of their wedding cake?”

Having this sense that had Bruce Jenner gone to Nepal for a spiritual retreat before his sex-change operation that the Internet would have exploded by now….

Kim Kardashian said in a “Today” interview that while she doesn’t fully understand her stepfather, she supports him “100%” in his plan to transition to a woman soon. Preferably no doubt as soon as possible so Bruce stops taking headlines from her and Kanye?

Apparently DUI charges against former Seminole P.J. Williams, who is projected to go early in next month’s NFL draft, have been dropped. The Florida D.A. has decided there was insufficient evidence to charge him. Am sure the fact Williams was arrested by the FSU Police Department has nothing to do with this.

Jeb Bush told donors that his Super PAC could hit the $100 million mark in fundraising this month. And told reporters on the same day “I don’t think you need to spend $1 billion to be elected President of the U.S. in 2016.” What, so Jeb thinks you need to spend $2 billion?

Both the Kentucky Derby and Wimbledon have banned selfie sticks this year. Or they could just allow the sticks, and ban the people carrying them. #enoughalready

 

The NCAA is apparently leaning towards reducing the shot clock from 35 to 30 seconds for men’s basketball. Maybe because they don’t want to confuse all these “one-and-dones” with higher math?

So what was the difference between the Toronto Raptors and the Toronto Maple Leafs this year? About a week.

Apparently a brawl, with punches thrown, broke out on a flight from Heathrow last night over legroom. It was on a flight to Muscat, Oman, and a man was arrested upon landing. Surprised it didn’t happen on a flight to the U.S. Of course American carriers would have charged another passengers an entertainment fee to watch.

(From my friend Matt Goldberg, “No Muscat Love on that flight.” )

Apparently representatives from Nevada have been to Colorado to see how recreational marijuana legalization is going. I can see that. Vegas needs more ways to loosen people’s inhibitions.

 

 

 

From Alex Kaseberg “A headline reads ‘Bush leads Clinton in Polls.’ What was the headline below that? ‘E-mails might replace Faxes’?”

When men were men, and women were men too?

April 27, 2015

Max Scherzer, who injured his thumb batting, says the NL should add the DH as “no one wants to see pitchers bat.'” And that “NFW” in a loud southern drawl you hear comes from Madison Bumgarner. ‪#‎SFGiants‬

If Bruce Jenner feels he has “always been a woman”, is this a small twisted revenge on all those East German Olympic women’s medal winners?

Here we go again. In Napa, a 29-year-old high school girl’s soccer coach was arrested after a 16-year-old girl reported he propositioned her and sexted her a picture of his genitals. Leaving aside the illegality and wrongness of this, when will men learn – no one wants to see pictures of your junk.

The Boston Celtics shuffled their lineup for Game 4 today against the Cleveland Cavaliers. Guess this is the NBA version of re-arranging deck chairs on the Titanic.

A British man will marry his 92-year-old fiancee on his 103th birthday June 13. Well this is one way to probably avoid the 7-year-itch.

 

Corinthian Colleges said it will end operations and shut down their campuses, affecting more than 16,000 U.S. students. And of course the SEC schools who never got a chance to schedule them in football.

Sen. Ted Cruz said yesterday that “there is no room for Christians in today’s Democratic Party.” I think this is one appropriate time for the phrase “Jesus wept.”

 

“Why there is no satire” headline of the day- “George W. Bush Bashes Obama on Middle East.

 

After letting the Ottawa Senators climb back from 3-0 to 3-2, the Montreal Canadiens closed out their series by winning today’s game 2-0 behind Carey Price’s 43 saves. So the Canadiens may not be this year’s Stanley Cup champions, but at least they’re not this year’s San Jose Sharks.

Giants and Rockies rained out in Denver.  Well, at least this was one game Casey McGehee knew he wouldn’t hit into a double play.

Although as much as I might rag on McGehee,  he has the same number of home runs  (1) and until today, the same slugging percentage of the man he replaced, Pablo Sandoval.

 

 

And all aboard the bus to hell driven tonight by T.C

“Billy Joel, age 65, and his pregnant girlfriend who is 34 were harassed in a New York restaurant. People were calling him a pervert and dirty old man. He said it totally ruined their 22nd anniversary.”