Posted tagged ‘Northern Iowa jokes’

The fat lady was humming, at least….

March 20, 2016

Texas A&M coach Billy Kennedy, when asked about their miracle comeback first said “To God be the Glory.” And God is thinking “Don’t blame me, I had switched to the Wisconsin-Xavier game.”

There was a rumor that for the last minute of  Northern Iowa Texas A&M game  ‪#‎TRUtv‬ executives were about to switch to Heidi? ‪#‎MarchMadness‬

 

 

Am confused. Somehow I thought the ‪#‎Pac12‬ was a major basketball conference? ‪#‎MarchMadness‬

Seven Pac-12 teams in the NCAA Tournament. One, Oregon, left after four days. That Stanford NIT win last year is looking better and better….

Johnny Manziel apparently has hired a super agent in an apparent last-ditch effort to find himself a new team. Hint to Johnny, the reason you’re unemployed isn’t your agent.

Who had ‪#‎MiddleTennesseeState‬ vs ‪#‎Syracuse‬ today? Now all of you liars put your hands down. ‪#‎MarchMadness‬

According to Boston media, Pablo Sandoval could be losing his starting job at third base to  25 year-old Travis Shaw, who is making the major league minimum.  Now,  I was okay when Panda said he needed a new challenge,  I was less okay when he started dissing the SF Giants. Apparently mean bitch karma agrees.

Raymond Moore, the tournament director of the BNP Paribas Open, called the WTA (women’s tennis association) “coattail riders,” and added “If I was a lady player, I’d go down every night on my knees and thank God that Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal were born, because they have carried the sport.”
Just wonder, how many American men tennis players most Americans can name? And also wonder what the odds on Serena playing his tournament again? ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

Andrew Pratt, a WR from Akron who took part in the university’s pro day, was accidentally shot by a teammate yesterday morning, but will recover. Guess Pratt really has proved he’s ready for the NFL.

RIchard Sherman ripped Roger Goodell for the new ejection after two personal fouls rule, and said “he’s just a shirt.” Wonder how much Sherman will get fined for that?

Kicker Jon Semerene was dismissed from Miami’s football team Friday after a DUI arrest that made in third Hurricane to be arrested in a week. So clearly the “Canes are back to being a major program?

Once again, who knows what really has gone on between Adam LaRoche and the White Sox: But if LaRoche had hit .307 last year instead of .207, pretty sure he and his son would still be at spring training.

 

Who the heck is ‪#‎ScottBaio‬?  (rhetorical question, mostly.)

How times have changed with running for President. We used to talk about “the best and the brightest.” Now the reason many give for supporting John Kasich – “at least he’s not bat-sh*t crazy.”

John Kasich said “under no circumstances” would he run serve as V.P. for Ted Cruz or Donald Trump. Right, like there was no way Paul Ryan was going to be speaker.

Bernie Sanders, dismissing the idea that he should drop out of the race, said “It would be extraordinarily undemocratic to the tell the people in half the states in America, ‘Oh, you don’t have a right to get involved in the nominating process for the Democratic candidate,'”
Of course, with the electoral college people in 3/4 of the states in America are basically being told their votes don’t matter in the actual election.

President Obama is visiting Cuba. Wonder how many conservatives will react saying, “So, not only is he a closet Muslim, he’s also a Communist?”

From T.C.  “The Toronto Maple Leafs have invited Chicago White Sox’s Adam LaRoche and his son to visit their locker room any time they want. As a matter of fact, they can even dress for the game and sit on the bench until needed.”

More upsets….

March 23, 2010

It just keeps getting worse for those who had bet on the experts’ predictions – including all those who picked Scott Brown over President Obama in the healthcare finals.


Why size doesn’t always matter – the population of Cedar Falls, Iowa, home of the Northern Iowa Panthers, is about 36,000. Just a few hundred less than the UNDERGRADUATE population of their next opponent, Michigan State.


There are now so many reporters now heading for Iowa that residents of the state who aren’t sports fans must wonder if they scheduled a really early presidential caucus.


Besides Kansas fans, the people who have to be the most upset by the Northern Iowa upset – sportscasters and copy editors who have to say and spell “Faroukmanesh.”


Not to say American sports fans have a short attention span, but with their brackets busted many fans will now care as much about the rest of March madness as they do at this point about Olympic hockey. – “So who won that game anyway?”

(note to Canadian readers, just kidding.)


Marc Ragovin sent along several funny comments yesterday about the new Mets slogan, designed around new closer K-Rod, “We believe in eight inning games.”

But over in Los Angeles, Dodgers fans are asking “When did they get that long?”


And over in Minnesota, where the Twins just lost closer Joe Nathan for the season, the response is “Sign us up for that too.”


The San Francisco 49ers have announced they may go into next season without a general manager. Thereby confusing many fans, who last season saw no discernible evidence that the team HAD a general manager.


And in a commie-pinko, did they really say that moment…. (Conservatives can stop reading now) You have to love all the Republicans who suddenly started saying about healthcare that they didn’t want the government coming between a doctor and a patient. Can we quote them on this the next time Roe v. Wade comes under attack?


Meanwhile, back in California politics, Meg Whitman has spent over $27 million on her campaign in the first three months of 2010. And this is a woman who believes we can’t afford healthcare reform.