Posted tagged ‘Michelle Obama jokes’

Still the one.

July 26, 2016

Hillary Clinton to “young girls” watching,  says she hopes to be the first woman president” but “you will be next.” Ok, but, I would like  more women presidents BEFORE they grow up.

‪#‎BillClinton‬ “For those of us with more yesterdays than tomorrows its all about our children & grandchildren” ‪#‎HesStillGotIt‬ ‪#‎DemsInPhilly‬

Bill Clinton is proving tonight you dont have to be ‪#‎MickJagger‬ to be a 70 year old rock star. ‪#‎DemConvention‬

Bill Clinton may or may not be “First Man” But making strong pitch to take over commercial for ‪#‎MostInterestingManInTheWorld‬

Bill Clinton on Dorothy Rodman “Knowing her was one of Hillary’s greatest gifts to me.” Shameless & lovely plug for the mother-in-law vote.

Seeing just a bit of sniping against Michelle and her future prospects after her speech saying she’s just a first lady. But really, does anyone think if Barack didn’t marry her that he’d be in the Oval Office today? ‪#‎hemarriedup‬

 

#‎MattCain‬ not only got the win tonight, he threw down the hitting gauntlet to ‪#‎Madbum‬ tomorrow. ‪#‎SFGiants‬

Would like to thank aliens who abducted ‪#‎SFGiants‬ & started wearing their uniforms for returning our real Giants tonight.

The Cowboys now have three defensive players suspended for substance abuse at the start of the 2016 season. So to their coaching staff will Dallas be adding a probation officer?

Eagles LB Nigel Bradham was arrested in Miami for aggravated assault; he allegedly beat up a 50 year-old hotel worker who didn’t get his umbrella set up quickly enough. Is Bradham trying to get traded to the 49ers or Cowboys?

Aaron Rodgers on his estranged little brother Jordan on “The Bachelorette” “I haven’t seen the show. To be honest with you, so it hasn’t really affected me a whole lot. As far as those kinds of things go, I’ve always found that it’s a little inappropriate to talk publicly about some family matters, so I’m just — I’m not going to speak on those things, but I wish him well in the competition.”
Sounds like Aaron actually learned something at Cal.

So now Trump is attacking Bernie Sanders. Is there anyone the Donald doesn’t turn on eventually, including the women he marries?

‪#‎CoryBooker‬ responded to @realDonaldTrump’s nasty tweet with “I love you Donald.” So is that the New Jersey equivalent of ‪#‎BlessYourHeart‬

Donald Trump is threatening not to pay a hotel in Virginia for an event Monday because he said it was too hot in the ballroom. Maybe because there isn’t an air-conditioning system in the world that can deal with that much hot air?

Donald Trump now says instead of using Twitter once elected President he’d have a personal White House hotline that will keep him “very busy at night” for complaints against VA hospitals.
Who is he kidding, the Donald didn’t even deal with complaints against Trump University?

 

Some critical of  Bill Clinton’s ignoring ‪#‎MonicaLewinsky‬ years. Same folks didn’t have a problem with ‪#‎Trump‬ not mentioning his 1st 2 wives.

Madeleine Albright says national security is not like hosting a reality tv show. Trump listening and trying to figure out how to fire her.

 

Interesting review of Clinton’s speech. “Bill cast Hillary as a real person—when she herself can seem remote, brittle, defensive and evasive. He sold her far better than she sells herself The man can tell a story. And in politics, that matters.”
The commie pinko sources? FoxNews.com

So the Dems aren’t all quite coming together and singing “Kumbaya.” On the other hand, they’re not making speeches like Ted Cruz, or doing stuff like John Kasich, who posted a fake website for “Trump-Putin 2016.” ‪#‎nottheOnion‬

 

Nice change over all today for unity at the DNC though . From Marc Ragovin “Hillary Clinton got so beaten up in Philadelphia on the opening night of the Democratic National Convention that even Santa Claus felt sorry for her.”

Tough ladies.

January 13, 2012

Demi Moore, 49, who recently ended her marriage to Ashton Kutcher, 33, is now apparently dating a 26 year old male model. Just one thing to say – “You go girl!”

Michelle Obama is denying reports in a recent book of tension between her and White House aides. The First Lady says people have tried to portray her as “some kind of angry black woman.” And she says when she finds out who the liars are she is going to kill them.

Stephen Colbert is hinting he may enter the GOP primary to run for to be “President of the United States of South Carolina.”

Apparently he’s already polling higher than Rick Perry.

Apparently the “vulture capitalist” that GOP rivals (and no doubt Democrats in the fall) are using against Mitt Romney phrase was most famously used against Meg Whitman by HER GOP rival Steve Poizner in 2010 Poizner’s strategist? Stuart Stevens, who is now advising Romney’s campaign. Karma is one mean, smart bitch..

John McCain, who just said choosing Sarah Palin as his running mate was “the best decision” he had ever made, now says the “Citizens United” Supreme Court ruling was “one of the worst decisions I have ever seen.” Well, one out of two’s not bad.

Apparently the weekend before his arrest, when the school knew about the investigation, Jerry Sandusky was watching Penn State play from the president’s box at Beaver Stadium. Anyone still think the school should have hired a new coach from within? (As Shakespeare would say “Something was rotten in the state of Pennsylvania.”)

A “Titanic Memorial Cruise” on the MS Balmoral from Southampton, England, on April 8 is sold out. (The ship will actually sail to the site of the ship’s sinking April 15, the actual 100th anniversary.) On that night presumably women on the cruise will be told not to skip dessert.

U.S. airlines have raised prices $20. Shocking. Not the added cost. But the fact they are calling it a fare hike, not a fuel surcharge, or winter tax, or seat fee, or something….

Just how nasty are Gingrich’s anti-Romney ads? Newt seems so upset with Mitt you’d think they used to be married to each other.

Dominique Strauss-Kahn is being investigated for his ties to a French prostitution ring. His defense is that he was “totally unaware” that the women he met in swinger sessions were prostitutes. Said Strauss-Kahn’s lawyer. “I defy you to tell the difference between a naked prostitute and any other naked woman.” In related news, Bill Clinton asked President Obama to appoint him Ambassador to France.