Posted tagged ‘Blackberry outage jokes’

Berry berry bad.

October 13, 2011

For some reason, Blackberries across the world have been experiencing service outages with their email, browsing and texting capabilities. Which comes at a particularly bad time for RIM with the recent release of the iPhone 4S. And here some people thought Steve Jobs would be bored up in heaven.

Blackberry’s worldwide problems continued Wednesday, even resulting in major outages in the United States. Although the U.S. problems eased in the afternoon. So much for that morning drop in auto accidents while drivers couldn’t text and check their messages.

“Too much technology” issue of the day: All these airlines pushing their travelers to do mobile boarding passes instead of paper…. Anyone who’s flying with a mobile boarding pass sent to their Blackberry today is completely, er, hosed. (PG version.)

Meanwhile, in Oak Park, Illinois, the city is trying to cut down on “distracted” driving and considering making it illegal to eat while driving a car. Well, as long as they don’t make drinking coffee while driving illegal.

Personally I’d take my chances with a distracted driver holding a coffee cup over many people on the road before they had their morning caffeine.

Postscript to NLCS game three and the NLDS: Hmm, maybe President Obama needs to have a squirrel run across the floor in Congress to rescue his jobs bill.

Wednesday night in St. Louis, fans were given “Rally Squirrel” towels, plus the chance to buy a stuffed animal for $5. This whole phenomenon could be the squirreliest thing in MLB since Bud Selig said he had no idea about the steroid problem.


Meanwhile, for the third game out of four in the ALCS there was at least a delay due to rain. Hmm, maybe God really is a Yankees fan.

Theo Epstein has apparently come to terms with the Chicago Cubs to be their new GM. The contract is apparently for 5 years and $15 million. With the provision that if he gets the Cubs to the World Series, Epstein will be nominated immediately for sainthood.

Boston College AD Gene DeFilippo has apologized to the ACC for saying in a newspaper interview that ESPN told the league to add Pittsburgh and Syracuse.

DeFilippo said in a letter that he “spoke inappropriately and erroneously regarding ESPN’s role in conference expansion.” Translation, ESPN may or may not have told the league to add the teams, but if they did they told us to shut up about it.

Herman Cain leads in a new poll of GOP presidential candidates with 27 %. Mitt Romney remains where he usually is, in second place, this time with 23%. While erstwhile leaders Bachmann and Perry have fallen off. But let’s be real here, what these polls consistently show is that 75-80% of GOP voters want ANYONE but Romney.

V.P. Joe Biden said Herman Cain’s “9-9-9” proposal would “unduly hurt the middle class in America.” Yeah, well that assumes there is still a middle class still left in America.

A Massachusetts family that got lost in a seven-acre corn maze apparently called 911 for help yesterday. Stories like this make you wonder why Obama doesn’t throw up his hands and say “I quit, you Americans are hopeless.”

Despite allegations that Cam Newton’s father “shopped” his services, and despite further allegations by former Auburn players that they were paid, the NCAA has determined that the university was not guilty of major wrongdoing and does not need to vacate their BCS championship. The ruling presumably cited the well-known “SEC codicil.”

From T.C. CFL (Canadian Football League) update. THe Montreal Alouettes’ Anthony Cavillo has set the record for most career yards passing (72,429 yds) for all pro quarterbacks. Congrats were that he passed in the record books. (Dan Marino, Damon Allen and Warren Moon)

Brett Favre was noticeably missing, but that’s only because Deanna still has his video phone.

From another funny friend (not T.C.) who wishes to remain anonymous: The Seahawks tried to trade Aaron Curry to the Raiders last week, too, but Al Davis said, “Over my dead body.”

Berry, berry, quite contrary.

December 18, 2009

Blackberry users across North America were unable to receive messages for several hours Thursday. You know what that means, millions of people in meetings were forced to actually pay attention to the speaker


Yahoo’s market share as a search engine declined again in November. Interested readers can get more details by Googling the story.


If their traffic gets much worse the company may soon be known as Ya-Who?


Sarah Palin apparently took her family to Hawaii for a few days of vacation. She said it was to give them all a little relaxing together time, and besides, the kids had never been to a foreign country.


Prince Charles is being accused of meddling in government affairs, after writing at least 8 letters to British government department heads in the last few years. Of course, considering the length of Charles’s relationship with his current wife Camilla, who could possibly be a better expert on government affairs?


Now that Tiger Woods’ doctor is under investigation for performance enhancing drugs, wonder if his alibi will be, “No, I didn’t sneak off to be with the doctor, I was with a waitress”


Woods and his wife Elin Nordegren may or may not be getting divorced. But one supposed bit of evidence is that Elin has recently been seen not wearing her wedding ring. But as countless people, especially women, have learned, seeing someone not wearing their wedding ring isn’t necessarily a sign of divorce. Unless they get caught.


Sometimes no comment or punchline is needed. Arizona State’s long time baseball coach, Pat Murphy, who was also the three-time reigning Pac 10 coach of the year, resigned on November 20 of this year for personal reasons. USA Today now reports that on November 19 a letter was sent to the school from the NCAA informing them of an investigation of alleged “major rule violations”

University officials insisted there was no link between Murphy’s abrupt resignation and the NCAA investigation.

I like the one from Bud Selig that he had no idea there were steroids in baseball better.

One I wish I had written from Jim Barach:

Tiger Woods has been named the “Athlete of the Decade” by the Associated Press. Woods was picked for his domination, performance and stamina. He didn’t do too badly on the golf course, either.