Back to jokes.

21 people in San Jose were treated for burns on their feet after a Tony Ribbons  “Unleash the Power Within” seminar, which concluded with participants “firewalking” in bare feet over hot coals.

Uh, wouldn’t a better title be “Unleash the Idiot Within?”

 

What’s more bizarre? That in late July 2012 Tim Lincecum won to boost his record to 4-10. Or that many skeptics dismissed the win by saying “Oh, it’s only against the Phillies?”

Our long national nightmare is over. Starting Monday, “The Daily Show” and “The Colbert Report” are back on Direct TV.

When asked about the new NBA idea to put ads on uniforms, MLB commissioner Bud Selig said “You learn never to say never, but you know, with us, uniforms are really important.” Translation, “The Yankees don’t want ads.”

Tennessee Titans WR Kenny Britt was arrested this morning for DUI in Kentucky. Okay, so we can’t solve all the problems of the world, but maybe the NFL could start mandating contracts that include players using cars and drivers?

A large black dog crossing the road in front of Tour de France riders has caused a crash in Friday’s stage of the race. And somewhere a French cat is sitting in the sun smirking and thinking “chien fou.”

An Oregon woman is selling her house after a divorce with a “For Sale” sign saying “Husband left us for a 22 year old. No adulterers please.” Maybe if she’s lucky she’ll sell it to a gay couple who’ve been together 40 years.

The U.S. Defense Department is making a special allowance for the San Diego Gay Pride parade, allowing  service members for the first time to march in such an event in uniform.

One word:  “Fabulous.”

From Gary Bachman:  “Olympic officials will reportedly provide more than 150,000 condoms to athletes at no cost during the London 2012 Olympic Games. The USA Men’s Basketball team asked, ‘What are condoms?’

Aubrey Huff is going to return to San Francisco for another MRI. Apparently he had a knee setback. “Darn” said absolutely no Giants fans.

 

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3 Comments on “Back to jokes.”

  1. Tom Dodd's avatar Tom Dodd Says:

    Considering the set up for Brandon Crawford’s 3 run homer in Atlanta, I wonder if, before sending him to the plate with bases loaded in Philly, Bochy didn’t have him whacked on the right knee.

  2. Augie's avatar Augie Says:

    “From Gary Bachman:  “Olympic officials will reportedly provide more than 150,000 condoms to athletes at no cost during the London 2012 Olympic Games. The USA Men’s Basketball team asked, ‘What are condoms?’

    More like, “only 150,000? Amateurs.” What did they hand out to the female athletes? Medals to hold firmly between their knees?

    On the military allowing uniformed members to march in Gay Pride parades, they should carry slogans – Marines -“A Few Good Men Wanted,” Sailors- “Any Port in a Storm,” WIN (women in the navy) should go back to their old name- WAVES and use “Join the navy, ride the waves,” Army- “Over there, over here, over queer, keep the ‘gay-son’ rolling,” Submariners – “We go deeper, stay longer,” Air Force- yeah, right.

  3. maaj's avatar maaj Says:

    The Aurora shooter should be sentenced to life in a Clockwork Orange style theater watching Nancy Grace


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