Where’s FEMA when you need them?

This just in: Penn State campus police say they are investigating a report that Joe Paterno may be sick.

Mitt Romney was campaigning in Orlando today. It went well except for one awkward moment when a Disney employee saw him and reported that one of their audio-animatronic figures must have gotten loose.

Apple’s CEO Tim Cook says he is “outraged” at reports of worker mistreatment. Is he outraged that workers are being treated badly or outraged that the media is reporting it?

Frank McCourt is starting to weed down groups bidding for the Dodgers. Great….and this selection process is being done by the man who made Los Angeles the franchise it is today.


My friend Jeff Klein (from Los Angeles) points out “He is the only person I know who can derail one of the biggest sports franchises, declare bankruptcy, have a messy divorce, be despised by everyone, endure a take over by MLB, and end up leaving one billion dollars richer. Romney-McCourt 2012.”

Mitt Romney is really getting angry at Newt Gingrich in Florida. Wonder how long it will take before Mitt threatens to strap him to the roof of the campaign bus.

On other hand, Romney apparently leads Newt Gingrich by 10 points with women in a recent Florida poll. Makes sense – the state is full of a lot of first and second wives.

Drew Brees, who will be a free agent, isn’t talking about “feeding his family,” or “being respected,” or testing the market. He does say he doesn’t want his deal to keep the Saints from retaining other key free agents. “My No. 1 priority, and it always has been this, is keeping our team together.” What a concept.

Colts owner Jim Irsay isn’t happy about Peyton Manning’s comments about the team, including saying that Indianapolis may not bring him back. Irsay said Manning should have “kept it in the family.” Well, at least for a few weeks, until the Colts owner was planning on booting him out of the family.

Stories continue to emerge about the dysfunctional Jets locker room, and indeed NY coach Rex Ryan said he didn’t have “the pulse” of the team. Many Jets fans were surprised to hear that – the team was playing like they didn’t HAVE a pulse.

The Orlando Magic blew a 27 point lead at home Thursday night, and lost to the Boston Celtics 91-83. The Magic scored EIGHT points in the 4th quarter. What, is Dwight Howard now angling for a trade to Miami?

Explore posts in the same categories: baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized

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One Comment on “Where’s FEMA when you need them?”

  1. tc Says:

    Is it possible that the o/u for the NHL and NFL All Star games to both be 60?


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