Posted tagged ‘Tebow time jokes’


December 12, 2011

What greedy Broncos fans really want now from Tebow is for him to start turning water into beer.

But okay, all these doubters who don’t believe Tebow is, as he says, a virgin. I’m inclined to believe the guy. If for no other reason than that any woman who HAD slept with him would have probably sold the story to the National Enquirer for $1 million plus.

Anyone else think that God is not only backing Tebow, that He/She is just f*ckng with us?

As long as Tebow doesn’t start singing “Climb Every Mountain.”

Actually, the Denver Broncos should be the favored team of those who miss watching NBA games on television. Just as in the NBA, there’s no point in really tuning in until the fourth quarter.

Ryan Braun’s spokesman issued a statement denying any “intentional violation” of Major League Baseball rules. But really, has any star player EVER come right out and said “Yeah, you caught me.” Only the little guys. Waiting to see what “tainted supplement” Braun supposedly took.

Chris Paul may now be headed to the Clippers? Jay Leno’s going to need to rewrite his punchlines.

The NFL MVP is supposedly the player a team absolutely cannot do without. Based on that criteria, shouldn’t the 2011 MVP be Peyton Manning?

Mitt Romney’s campaign is trying to recover from his casual offer to wager $10,000 with Rick Perry in Saturday’s debate. Even Pete Rose is saying he wouldn’t have made that bet.

The University of Cincinnati issued major suspensions to four players involved in last night’s basketball brawl with Xavier. Guess the school doesn’t want the team competing with the Bengals.

A United Airlines 757 en-route from Denver to Los Angeles had to divert to Grand Junction Sunday morning when an engine shut down. Wonder if the airline gave passengers extra frequent flier miles? Or charged them for the extra stop.

Three straight second-place Heismann finishes for Stanford: The Cardinal is becoming the Susan Lucci of college football.

Watched the Minnesota Vikings blow a chance (with the help of a missed call) to beat the Detroit Lions today and fall to 2-11. Had Peyton Manning not been injured, Andrew Luck would probably be reunited with Toby Gerhart next year.

Actually, the Lions should have been called for a face mask at the goal line with a few seconds to go…. But for any Stanford fan with painful memories of Big Game against Cal in 2009, just one question… why didn’t Detroit give it to Toby Gerhart with first and goal from the one?

Now it turns out that Penn State asst coach Mike McQueary, allegedly told a family friend a different story about the shower incident. According to a Harrisburg paper. “he heard ‘sex sounds’ and a running shower before a young boy peered around the corner of the shower’s stall, then saw an adult arm reach around the boy’s waist and pull him out of view.” Beginning to wonder if there is/was an honest person in the whole program.