Posted tagged ‘Pakistan jokes’

Implausible deniability?

May 6, 2011

 Pakistan is sticking to their story that they had no idea where Bin Laden was staying. When told that this defied logic, they pointed out that the current U.S. Secretary of State said she had no idea that her husband was straying.

And in a sports-related vein,  Pakistan’s claim  makes about as much sense as Bud Selig’s claim that he and MLB officials had no idea about the steroid problem.

Los Angeles Lakers’ forward Ron Artest has been suspended from game three against the Mavericks for a flagrant foul on Dallas guard J.J. Barea. Wow, at this point that could be half the Lakers’ season.

Apparently Prince William and Kate will be visiting California in July. No word on their itinerary but surely they will visit San Francisco? The “City by the Bay” certainly knows how to appreciate a good queen.

The Pac 12’s new $3 billion contract with ESPN and Fox will mean a lot more Thursday and Friday night football games, never a favorite of coaches because of what they do to preparation and recovery time. Meanwhile we wonder how some of these kids get the idea it’s all about the money?

Donald Trump has announced he will no longer be driving the celebrity pace car in the Indianapolis 500 this year. Guess he can’t stand even the appearance anymore of turning to the left.

(Augie says the Donald dropped out because someone told him he’d have to wear a helmet and muss up his hair.)

Artest actually just won the NBA’s “J. Walter Kennedy Citizenship” Award last Tuesday.  So does his suspension mean the award will have an asterisk?

Actually Artest really in general does seem to have turned his life around, and has mostly been a model player who’s made service to the community a priority. (He even raffled off his 2010 championship ring to raise money for mental health charities.) 

But seriously, the NBA’s best citizen?  A few years ago that seemed as likely as Kobe Bryant getting an award as the league’s best husband.

A top ranked Washington Capitals were swept out of the NHL playoffs by the Tampa Bay Lightning. The GOP are trying to figure out if there’s a way to blame this on Obama.

President Obama yesterday wished all Americans a happy Cinco de Mayo. And Sarah Palin responded “Idiot. Had Obama grown up in the U.S. he would know; mayo doesn’t sink.  It floats. Mustard sinks.

Apparently George W. Bush, despite his invitation from President Obama, declined to attend today’s Ground Zero ceremony because he was feeling left out and not getting much credit. Of course, part of the problem is that Cheney made him feel the same way.