Posted tagged ‘Obama birth certificate jokes’

Looks like “we” haven’t made it.

September 15, 2012




Bobby Valentine, on the Red Sox – “This is the weakest roster we’ve ever had in September in the history of baseball.” Yeah, he’s got his team’s back – with a sharp knife in it.


Kentucky has a new $7 million dorm for men’s basketball, with all singles and a private chef, along with flat screen televisions, pool tables and leather recliners. It’s almost enough to make the players wish they were staying more than a year.

Chicago Cubs president Theo Epstein said today that rebuilding the team “won’t happen overnight” and that 2013 may also be tough. Undaunted, die-hard Cubs fans immediately put on t-shirts saying “Wait until the year after next year.”

Mitt Romney on pop culture: “I’m kind of a Snooki fan. Look how tiny she’s gotten. She’s lost weight.” Uh, Mitt does know Snooki’s no longer pregnant?

Reading the media coverage, I am confused. So is there some football game before Jim Harbaugh and Jim Schwartz meet up again on Sunday?

Move over Arizona and Florida, we’ve got a new challenger for the crazy crown. In Kansas, the State Objections Board – composed of 3 GOP elected officials –has postponed until Monday a decision on removing President Obama from the state ballot over objections about his birth certificate.

ESPN’s Andrew Stark says Buster Posey is now the favorite for the NL MVP. Shocking. ESPN knows anyone plays baseball well on the West Coast?!

All this hubbub over the topless pictures of Kate. It could have been worse – the paper could have published pictures of Camilla.



David Price got his 18th win of 2012, improving to 7-3 against the Yankees. Unfazed, New York management feels confident that in a new years they will  have Price’s free agency contract ready.




Mitt Romney, about his October 3 upcoming first debate with President Obama:  “I think the challenge that I’ll have in the debate is that the president tends to, how shall I say it, to say things that aren’t true.”

As opposed to what Mitt himself says, which is true until he says something later.




Trump card?

April 28, 2011

 Donald Trump says “I am so proud of myself” for “forcing” Obama to release his birth certificate. So this is what we would have to look forward too with a Trump presidency? Spending a fortune to do something completely unnecessary while ignoring important issues? (Actually sounds like Reagan’s “invasion” of Grenada.)

And really.  My stock response for years now on the Obama birth question. Okay, if you REALLY think there was a conspiracy and his birth certificate was faked, don’t you think the Clinton machne wouldn’t have unearthed it during the primary?

Meanwhile, what happened to Trump’s claim that his investigators were “turning up interesting things?” Maybe that meant they have absolutely found the best Mai Tai in Honolulu?

But now  that Obama has released his birth certificate,  will Trump really follow through and release his tax records. Or will the Democrats hold out for him releasing receipts from his hairdresser?

Since the birth certificate thing didn’t work out, now Trump is suggesting Obama was a “terrible student, terrible,” and asked “How does a bad student go to Columbia and then to Harvard?” “Oh, STFU,” responded George W. Bush.

At this point you almost have to wonder, is Donald Trump part of some perverse scheme to ensure the re-election of President Obama.  By assuring that no sane person will vote for the GOP candidate in 2012?

That Obama birth certificate is really frustrating for a lot of conservatives. Now they need to come up with a new code phrase to say “It’s because he’s black.”

Open note to all birthers. Fine, we admit it, President Obama was not born in the U.S. Barack was actually placed in a space capsule as a baby by his father Jor-el and sent to earth just before his home planet exploded.

from my friend Alex Schubert:  A new survey says that frequent Twitter users have shorter relationships. And really frequent Twitter users don’t have relationships at all.

And back to sports: The New York Mets are apparently $625 MILLION in the hole. Wow, that’s almost as much as the receipts from a sellout at Yankee Stadium.

Former badboy Ron Artest was just named the winner of this year’s J . Walter Kennedy Citizenship Award, presented by the Professional Basketball Writers Association for outstanding service and dedication to the community. Artest will receive the actual award as soon as the writers can locate enough flying pigs for the ceremony.