Posted tagged ‘Manny Ramirez’

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Who wants to be a slumdog millionaire?

February 23, 2009

Slumdog Millionaire, filmed on a modest budget in Mumbai, was a big winner at the Academy Awards. Now we’re even outsourcing our awards to India.

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Actually, in the U.S., plans are afoot for a documentary titled “Slumdog Millionaire.” It’s about several real estate investors who used to be billionaires.

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The producers of Slumdog Millionaire brought several of the child actors to the Oscar ceremony. The process, however, wasn’t easy. First they had to work out the travel schedules, then there were the visa issues, and then Angelina Jolie tried to adopt them.

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Regarding this year’s Oscar gowns….was the whole production supposed to be a tribute to “the Little Mermaid?”

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Former President Clinton has been speaking out and giving a lot of helpful advice to President Obama. Even Joe Biden is saying “Bill, less is more.”

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And back to baseball, Los Angeles Dodgers’ general manager says that converations between the team and Manny Ramirez have become “more frequent and longer”, and that while he wouldn’t say it was progress, “we’re just talking much more.”

Is this a contract negotiation or marriage counseling?

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He’s just not that into you…

February 4, 2009

Shouldn’t someone tell the Dodgers that about Manny Ramirez?

(Who has just turned down his third contract offer from the team, this last for $25 million for a year.)

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Question of the night. So how come not paying taxes disqualifies you from being Secretary of Health and Human Services, but it doesn’t disqualify you from being Secretary of the Treasury?

Wonder if this means Geithner might have been disqualifed if he cheated on his medical insurance?

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And if I could draw, I would post an editorial cartoon. Two kids with a lemonade stand, Two money jars on the stand, one labelled “For lemonade”, the other labelled “For the IRS.” And the caption of one kid saying “Well, I do plan to run for office someday.”

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300,000 people showed up for the Pittsburgh Steelers’ victory parade Monday. Which is about as many as will show up to watch the Pittsburgh Pirates. For the season.

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A sheriff in South Carolina is thinking of charging Michael Phelps after simply seeing the picture of him using a bong in a British newspaper. Teenagers and college students all over the state are hoping no one ever shows the sheriff how to use Facebook.

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Bud Selig made over $17 million as commissioner of baseball last year, more than all but three Yankees players – Jason Giambi, Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez. Though to be fair, unlike those players, Selig actually had to work in October.

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Maybe this explains why Selig never pushed for a salary cap – the Yankees are the only team with employees standing between him and allegations of excessive CEO compensation.

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The most watched Super Bowl?

February 3, 2009

Despite a less than marquee matchup between the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Arizona Cardinals, this year’s Super Bowl was the second-most watched ever. Well, yeah, at this point most Americans couldn’t afford to go out and do anything else.

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Although spring training starts in a few weeks, Manny Ramirez still has not decided where he will go for the 2009 season. Even Brett Favre is saying “Dude, make up your mind.”

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Actually Manny Ramirez is looking for at least a four year contract. Presumably so in two years he can complain and say he wants out of it.

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Though speaking of Brett Favre, New York Jets general manager Mike Tannebaum said he told Favre he can take “months if necessary” to decide if he will return for the 2009 season. Isn’t telling Brett Favre to take his time like telling Joe Biden “speak as long as you’d like?”

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After that newspaper photo appeared of him smoking pot in an English newspaper, Michael Phelps said his behavior was “regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment.” Of course, mostly what he regrets is being too stoned to remember that these days most people have cellphone cameras.

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Proof that not all my jokes are anti Republican.

Now we know why Democrats vote against cutting taxes. They don’t plan to pay them anyway.

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But on the other hand:

In Pittsburgh, thanks to the Steelers, schoolchildren were given two hours off from school Monday morning after the Super Bowl. Former President George W. Bush heard about this and said that he thought it would be a nice gesture for the University of Phoenix to give their students the morning off too.

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An Arizona station apologized to its viewers over their accidentally showing 30 seconds of pornography during the Super Bowl. Apparently the station received numerous complaints, mostly from men who wondered why they went back to the game so soon.

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