Posted tagged ‘London jokes’

Tale of the tape

August 9, 2012

Yet another tape-delayed night at the Olympics about to begin. But with all the online and other spoilers there’s more drama in watching eliminations in American Idol and DWTS.

 

A thought about beach volleyball. Bikinis in London seem as incongruous as ads for dentists.

Much discussion lately about if the Founding Fathers ever imagined what would happen with the 2nd Amendment. On lighter note pretty darn sure the ancient Greeks never imagined Olympic beach volleyball.

Defending Olympic gold-medal champion race walker Alex Schwazer was kicked out of the London Games for blood doping. Cheating race-walkers? What’s next? Quick, someone set up testing for the Professional Bowlers tour.

At a press conference after being expelled from the Olympics for blood doping, racewalker Alex Schwazer cried and said he was actually happy he’d been caught, saying he wasn’t “made to deceive people”, and “couldn’t take it anymore.” Hmm, what Alex’s next move, running for office?

 

Randy Travis was arrested for DUI after crashing his car. Officials said he was “naked, combative,” and threatened police officers. “Drunk, naked, nasty and busted…” Well, Travis is in a lot of trouble, but he’s got some great starter lyrics for his next song.

Bobby Valentine just said he thinks his Red Sox are a playoff team. And Josh Beckett is thinking, “Hey bro, how much of my beer are have you been drinking?”

On the pre-game show for their nationally-televised game of the week, ESPN seriously dissed most of the SF Giants lineup. Can they do this every night, please?

(for anyone who didn’t see, Giants 15-Cardinals 0)

 

Personally I don’t care if Ann Romney has a whole stable of purebreds.  But can only imagine if instead of Ann, it was Malia Obama who had a expensive horse and was entering dressage competitions.

So the GOP is running a misleading ad saying Obama will let welfare recipients get away without working, when the administration has just implemented a strict waiver program that gives states more flexibility with the rules for things like job training. The waiver originally was pushed by Republicans, including,  surprise, Mitt Romney.

(So besides the debates with Obama, this fall will we get to see Mitt Romney debate himself?)

The Mitt goes to London show

July 27, 2012

Heading off on a seven day cruise vacation – so posts may be less frequent/shorter.    In meantime, it looks like the Olympics will be entertainment enough. Especially the Mitt and Boris (London Mayor) show.

On the first leg of his international trip, Mitt Romney has managed to insult England. What’s he going to do for an encore in Poland, tell a Polish joke?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2179309/Mayor-Boris-Johnson-attacking-Mitt-Romney-Olympic-torch-arrives-London.html

Cat fight: (male politician version) Mitt Romney criticized London’s preparedness for the Olympic games. British PM David Cameron responded “”We are holding an Olympic Games in one of the busiest, most active, bustling cities anywhere in the world. Of course it’s easier if you hold an Olympic Games in the middle of nowhere.”

Mitt Romney has indicated he views this foreign trip to England, Israel, Poland as a leadership audition. So far so good, for President Obama.

Fred Willard, 72, arrested for lewd conduct in an adult movie theater, said on the Jimmy Fallon show that he did nothing to warrant arrest. He might have added “And for some reason my grandchildren say they are getting me a computer for my birthday.

Got to love this quote: “I don’t have a problem making it harder. I want people in Florida to want to vote as bad as that person in Africa who walks 200 miles across the desert. This should not be easy.” (Buying guns, on the other hand, should be easy.)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/jul/26/florida-assault-voting-rights

 

Mitt Romney is now doing a 180 on his negative comments about the Olympics. On the bright side if he keeps this up Mitt may have one of those multiple somersault platform dives named after him.

Kristen Stewart has issued a press release admitting to cheating on Robert Pattinson. And it wasn’t even with Taylor Lautner. (This post probably won’t make sense to anyone over 25.)