Posted tagged ‘Chris Christie’

Rough night

October 5, 2011

For comedy writers. The Yankees avoided choking and Chris Christie announced he will not run for President.

But ever onward.

Watching the Yankees win big is like watching Microsoft put another moderately funded start-up out of business.

This afternoon the Tampa Bay Rays became the first team eliminated with the baseball playoffs. When asked their reaction, most sports fans in Tampa responded “We have a baseball team?”

MLB fined St. Louis manager Tony La Russa for complaining on television about “two different strike zones” in Sunday’s game. But Yankees manager Joe Girardi also complained publicly about the strike zone for Sabathia last night. Well, not sure about two different strike zones, but where the Yankees are concerned MLB has two different rule books.

New drugs for PTSD have the effect in some cases of wiping out memories. Although some scientists worry that such medications could also change people’s biographies and thus identities. Of course, there is a way for some men to take the drugs and still have total recall with details available – it’s called a wife.

Note for women who are hoping to get a new iPhone 5 or 4s for Christmas. Most of the guys who will be first in line to get one are single.

A Michigan high school girl , Brianna Amat, was named homecoming queen, and then that same evening went out and kicked the winning field goal for her school. She was immediately offered a tryout with the Philadelphia Eagles.

So the NBA has now cancelled the pre-season, and is threatening to cancel the regular season. Which means that fans of professional basketball will be stuck watching John Calipari coach at Kentucky.

Ralph Nader spoke at UC Berkeley today saying major universities should eliminate athletic scholarships or risk losing their “academic luster.” Of course, in the SEC their idea of “academic luster” means shiny bowl championship rings.

Hank Williams Jr. is apologizing for comparing President Obama to Hitler. But the singer’s’ views are so conservative, you have to wonder, was he apologizing to fans of Obama or fans of Hitler?

Now for the anti-Hank Williams Jr.: Garth Brooks’ lyrics to “We shall be free: “When the last thing we notice is the color of skin. And the first thing we look for is the beauty within. When the skies and the oceans are clean again. We shall be free.” “When we’re free to love anyone we choose. When this world’s big enough for all different views…. We shall be free.” (Google the whole song if you like country music at all.)

Today, October 4, United Airlines sent out a message to their frequent fliers saying that it was “Time to book Thanksgiving travel.” Although of course discount fares for peak days were sold out a couple months ago. Means their marketing department is as on time as many of their planes.

Chris Christie says “Now is not my time.” And says unequivocally that he will not run for President in 2012. This might be the strongest sign yet that despite his poll numbers, Barack Obama is poised to win re-election.

The Almighty works in strange and magical ways. LSU QB Jordan Jefferson, speaking out for the first time since his suspension said “God puts people in certain situations. I don’t regret anything. Everything happened for a reason. I’ve learned a lot from this.” Hmm, missed the part in the Bible where God puts people in bar fights.

From Bill Littlejohn: A video is making the rounds in which a Cowboys fan and his son take three attempts to burn a Tony Romo jersey.In the wake of this, Cleveland Cavaliers fans have announced an instructional video”