Gentlemen, and ladies, start your excuses…..

And if you are reading this, you are probably too late to change your brackets.

“One and done” has some disadvantages and advantages. Last year’s Kentucky players didn’t get to see them raise the NCAA championship banner, this year’s won’t be on campus for all the Robert Morris jokes.

President Obama formally revealed all of this NCAA picks this morning on ESPN. Despite alleged GOP attempts to filibuster them.

Apparently Derek Jeter may start the season on the DL. Though he still hopes to sit in the Yankees dugout, yelling at the other team’s punks to get off his field.

Syracuse’s basketball program is apparently again under NCAA investigation. How will we know when the allegations are really serious? When Jim Boeheim resigns to spend more time with his family.

James Madison won their play-in game for the right to play Indiana. Isn’t this a bit like winning the Christians competition for the right to go against the Lions?

Lindsay Lohan, who reportedly hit the clubs after her rehab plea deal is now saying “It wasn’t me.” Maybe the “Parent Star” star is taking this “evil twin” thing a bit too seriously?

Wisconsin will open their 2015 football season against Alabama. Guess the “Little Sisters of the Poor” aren’t available?

The Tonight Show may be moving back to New York in late 2014. So first question, will all those Dodgers jokes become Yankees jokes or Mets jokes?

Open note to Michelle Shocked: Just shut up and go away again. Your 15 minutes have expired.

Neiman Marcus has paid an undisclosed fine to the FTC in a settlement. Apparently they were selling real fur products and pretending they were fake fur.

As opposed to many Neiman Marcus shoppers who pretend they have “real” faces and bodies when they are….nah, I don’t need to finish this sentence.

At Knoxville airport, Delta workers ordered pizza to be delivered to passengers stuck on the tarmac for a flight diverted due to bad weather. The really shocking thing… the airline didn’t charge them by the slice.

Hanley Ramirez injured his thumb in the WBC final, and may be out up to 10 weeks. At this point the Dodgers and Yankees may not end up in the World Series, but they could meet up in a special baseball edition of “Survivor.”

From my friend Jim Barach, yeah, this just about sums it up.  “On the tenth anniversary of the invasion of Iraq, 53% of Americans say the war was a mistake. The other 47% are still debating between disaster, debacle and catastrophe.”

All in the family trivia: If Indiana wins the NCAA tournament another Harbaugh will be celebrating with a trophy – Joanie Crean, wife of coach Tom Crean, is Jack and Jim’s sister.

Okay, March Madness brackets aside – Angie or Kree to win American Idol. IMHO.

Explore posts in the same categories: political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized

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