Left Coast Sports Babe

Researchers have found that the disease that killed Lou Gehrig may not have been “Lou Gehrig’s Disease.” Responded former President George W. Bush – “See, I KNEW it was a hard question.”

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My son, Carey Schwartz, heard this line on this morning’s ESPN Sportscenter “by the way, all 3 of Jason Heyward’s walk-off hits this season have come at home.”

Really?

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Roger Clemens was indicted today on perjury charges for lying to Congress. When will they ever learn? You just cannot get away with lying on Capitol Hill – unless you’ve gotten there by being elected.

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Clemens’ lawyer has said that the fact that his client voluntarily testified before Congress without being subpoenaed is proof that he is innocent. Not necessarily, it could also be proof that Roger is stupid.

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One thing for sure, it doesn’t look like Roger is any “Rocket” scientist.

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The SF Giants’ Aaron Rowand, batting .246, got a very warm reception when he finally played in the third game of the series against the Phillies in Philadelphia. Partly because Philadelphia fans remember him fondly, but probably even more because the Phillies weren’t stupid enough to pay $12 million a year to keep him.

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Open note to these players like Adrian Peterson or Albert Haynesworth who seem to have trouble with their teams regarding showing up or being in shape for training camp: There’s a simple solution – just say you might be retiring, then show up when you please and get nothing but gratitude.

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An American Airlines flight from San Francisco to JFK was delayed by a “verbal threat.” Either that or it was all a misunderstanding. The bomb on board the caller may have been referring to was the in-flight movie “The Last Airbender.”

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Bedbugs have now apparently bitten people in two New York City movie theaters. And all over the city men are telling their significant others “Honey, you know I’d love to see ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ with you, but I just don’t want you to be hurt”

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Besides disorderly conduct and creating a nuisance, apparently prosecutors are going to charge Jersey Shore’s star “Snooki” with being “criminally annoying.” If they can get a conviction on that last one, think we can indict Brett Favre and Lebron James next?

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President Obama really missed his chance with this whole religion thing. A simple statement would have been “Of course I’ve been praying to God regularly for years. I’m a Bears fan. Remember Rex Grossman?”

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Marc Ragovin, on the fact that Prosecutors were only 1 for 24 in their chargers against Rod Blagojevich. That’s about as good as Mets hitters with men in scoring position.
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This entry was posted on August 20, 2010 at 12:01 am and is filed under political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: baseball jokes, Brett Favre jokes, Janice Hough, Roger Clemens jokes