Posted tagged ‘United Airlines computer jokes’

A complete airline computer meltdown – Shirley you can’t be serious?

June 18, 2011

As United Airlines customers found out Friday night – they were serious.  The airline lost all its computers for six hours. Planes couldn’t take off, passengers couldn’t check in, and apparently many passengers on planes couldn’t get off.

Or as JetBlue says “Winter business as usual.”

At one point,  all United flights that had not taken off were grounded indefinitely. Changing the airline’s slogan from ‘It’s time to fly” to “Does anybody really know what time it is?”

Stay tune Monday for a new “computer maintenance ticket” fee?.

Bad timing award?   United Airlines’ computers are slowly coming back online after a six hour complete outage. This in the same week that the FAA authorized American Airlines to replace their pilot flight manuals with iPads.




Bristol Palin’s tell-all memoir will be published next week, following the two books written by her mother. Wonder if she will continue Sarah’s theme of complaining that the media just won’t give them any privacy?

Bristol, for what it’s worth, refers to the the father of her son as a  “gnat.”   So much for last year’s quote  “I believe that wherever possible, if the parents can cooperate and co-parent in a positive way, the child will benefit…. putting aside the past is in Tripp’s best interest.”

New York Archbishop Timothy Dolan is leading the fight against gay marriage in New York. While the Archbishop is entitled to his beliefs, wonder he wasn’t nearly so fervent in fighting to defrock pedophile priests?

Apparently AARP may be willing to negotiate on raising the retirement age for social security. We will know this is for sure if and when they introduce their new AARP spokesman – Brett Favre.

So in the aftermath of the Anthony Weiner debacle, will young couples start changing their wedding vows to say “and forsaking all others, keep thee and thy naughty tweets only unto her?”

Tiger-less U.S. Open update  – (What, there’s a golf tournament this weekend?)   What’s more bizarre? That 22 year old Rory McIlroy shot a U.S. Open record 11 under par for the first two rounds? Or that he did it while double-bogeying the 18th hole Friday?

The NCAA has announced their schedule of 35 bowl games for 2011-12, with ZERO games on January 1. Because it is a Sunday and thus games would conflict on television with NFL games if they settle the lockout. Can’t imagine how these college athletes get the idea it’s all about the money.

Frank and Jamie McCourt have agreed to a divorce settlement that MAY allow Frank to keep control of the Dodgers. Dodgers fans are considering a petition to urge Jamie to keep fighting.

A survey found that Facebook users were 43 percent more likely than other Internet users to say that “most people can be trusted.” That number would have been a lot higher except for all those women who got messages from Anthony Weiner.