Posted tagged ‘Glen Campbell jokes’

Was the ring the thing?

June 23, 2011

Phoenix Suns president Lon Babby called into a Phoenix radio station  to say” I have said it a zillion times. We are not trading Steve Nash,” 

Translation, no one made them a good enough offer.

George Clooney and Elisabetta Canalis announced they have ended their two-year relationship, possibly over his unwillingness to propose marriage.

“So what?” responded millions of men. “There’s still hope,” responded millions of women.

Now we are hearing that Newt Gingrich had a second line of credit at Tiffany’s for $1 million. This level of credit line was known privately at the store as a “Kobe Special.”

Meanwhile, more campaign staffers are deserting  Gingrich. The only way this story could be any better is if some of them went to work for his ex-wives.

North Carolina has received an NCAA notice of allegations from the NCAA outlining numerous “potential major violations” in football. Guess this settles it, the Tarheels have officially arrived as a major football program.

Okay, who predicted this. If the All-Star pitchers were chosen today, the San Francisco Giants starter who most deserves to make the team is…. . Ryan Vogelsong?!!

(and non-Giants fans, yes, look it up  – 5 and 1 record, with an ERA of 1.86  – well over a run lower than any other starter on the staff.)

The US beat Panama in the Gold Cup semi-final Wednesday night. Prompting this response from many American sports fans “That’s really great, what sport were we playing?”

Mark Cuban may now be interested in buying the Dodgers. And it could happen.  Frank McCourt may have accomplished the impossible – getting Bud Selig to think Cuban might be the lesser of any two evils as an owner.

Sad news, Glen Campbell has announced he has Alzheimer’s. The only silver lining, soon he won’t remember the outfits he wore for Rhinestone Cowboy.

Sarah Palin has reportedly quit her bus tour halfway through. Wow, Santa must have decided that as a group comedy writers had been very very good last year.

Follow up story later today:  Sarah Palin now disputes reports that she has canceled her bus tour. She posted on Facebook that she’s been called for jury duty, and that she will resume the tour “when the time comes.” Does Sarah really think she’d be picked? Neither side would expect her to stay through the whole trial.

Two I wish I’d written:

From Marc Ragovin:  Jack McKeon walking out to the mound to make a pitching change is the baseball equivalent of the four corners offense.

From Jim Barach:  A 90 year old Florida woman married a man she met on The amazing part is that she thought she was buying a comforter on eBay.