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Is it safe?

April 22, 2014

Security folks are still trying to figure out how a teenage boy was able to get onto the San Jose airport tarmac and into the wheel well of a commercial jet. On the brighter side, TSA said that day they did confiscate over 100 bottles of water.

 

Apparently Lindsey Vonn and Elin Nordegren have become good friends. Makes sense, Elin wants to know about her kids’ potential stepmom, and LIndsey wants to know how to check Tiger’s cellphone.

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A New Jersey cardiologist, trying to get out of paying $135,000 for FOUR visits to a strip club. claims he was drugged during each visit. Jeez. The guy is smart enough to get into med school, and he can’t think of a more creative excuse?

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The teenager who stowed away in the wheel well of that Hawaiian Airlines flight said he was trying to see his mother in Somalia. So give him an A for effort and an F for geography.

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On the Late Show last night, Courteney Cox said last night again that the “Friends” reunion is “not gonna happen.” Translation. no one has yet given them enough rea$on$.

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It will cost the Buffalo Bills about $3 million to settle a class action lawsuit for sending too many text messages to fans. So presumably the team will only send their fans one text to explain why this settlement means a rise in ticket prices.

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AOL is reporting that their email users have been hacked. Shocking. AOL still has email users?

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Inside airline humor:  The SF Chronicle’s Leah Garchik reports there will be a 50th reunion this weekend of Pan Am Class 12, 16 women who trained together in 1964 to become stewardesses. And then presumably after the reunion many of the women will go back to work as flight attendants on United’s Hawaii routes.

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Bob Dole, 90, in an interview said his “main concern about (the 2016) elections is that, well, I just hope I’m still around to vote then. If not … I plan to vote absentee.” If Jimmy Carter had said that the GOP would be screaming about potential voter fraud.

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More from Bob Dole “A number of the younger members, first-termers like Rand Paul, (Marco) Rubio Morand that extreme-right-wing guy – Ted Cruz? All running for president now. I don’t think they’ve got enough experience yet.” So maybe Dole secretly wants to run again with John McCain?

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At this point opposing pitchers facing the #SFGiants hitters must feel the way cats do when they stumble upon a convention for disabled mice.

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Well, as frustrated as the #SFGiants are, at least their players aren’t likely to be involved in a brawl. None of them can hit anyone.

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Shocks and aftershocks.

March 11, 2011

On a serious if snide note – To all Tea Partiers and others who want to slash government spending absolutely to the bone:. How do you feel about cutting the USGS (United States Geological Survey) and FEMA budgets now?

(my sister, a seismologist, points out that if we were in a government shutdown, it would be illegal for any USGS employee to do any work or even talk to the media right now.)

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And back to a semi-lighter note.  The Government of Japan has issued warnings for residents NOT to head to the coast to see the waves. Can we just give anyone who disobeys those orders a Darwin award right now? 

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Think you’re feeling lonely today? Imagine being a Republican union member in Wisconsin.

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House Speaker John Boehner said that the Obama administration is exacerbating rising energy costs. Tough words from a man who isn’t even willing to cut down on his own personal use of electricity with his tanning bed.

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‎30 million votes for the first, relatively trivial, night of American Idol? Maybe the producers can adjust the show so that the final is in the fall – combining it with the general election might actually increase turnout.

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The three officials who missed two major turnovers in the last seconds of the St. John’s-Rutgers game have voluntarily withdrawn from the remainder of the Big East tournament. Well, it’s not like they were doing anything anyway.

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The Dalai Lama says he’s retiring. Responded Brett Favre “The first time is the hardest.”

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Charlie Sheen thinks Rob Lowe would be a good replacement for him on “Two and a Half Men.” On the other hand, Muammar Qaddafi might soon be available.

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David Brooks may have ignited a controversy by saying of Newt Gingrich “I wouldn’t let that guy run a 7-11, let alone the country.”  Brooks has already had a angry demand for an immediate apology, from 7-11.

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AOL announced it will slash 900 jobs worldwide, or nearly 20 percent of its work force. This is shocking news, AOL still HAS a work force?
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Huffington Post usually runs banner headlines on major corporate layoffs. So I’m sure it must be an oversight that they don’t have such a headline on AOL laying off 20 percent of its staff.

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And they said it couldn’t be done. Tonight the Miami Heat had most of America rooting for…the Lakers!?

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Ohio State officials, in a letter to the NCAA, said that they originally considered a stronger punishment for football coach Jim Tressel than just missing the Buckeyes’ first two games. But that might have violated the most important of the school’s rules – “Thou shalt win.”

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