What happens in Vegas…

Phrase we didn’t expect to hear from anyone six months ago: Marco ‪#‎Rubio‬ saying “I’m the only candidate who can beat Donald ‪#‎Trump‬.

 

 

Now Trump is vowing to put “bad dudes” in Guantanamo Bay. What about making America great again? Shouldn’t that mean he U.S. has the greatest prisons?

Marco Rubio says there’s no national security rationale for closing Gitmo    As if there was ever a real national security rationale for an American prison in Cuba?

Donald Trump tonight on Ted Cruz “”There’s something wrong with this guy.” So maybe that furry thing that lives on Trump’s head is somehow related to that blind squirrel that finds nuts?

 

Johnny Manziel is back on Twitter, Retweeting advice he got from Charlie Sheen?! Ah, good to see Manziel is looking for serious role models.

New York City has been hit by a rash of knife attacks lately, fortunately none of them fatal. If only the slashers were armed?

 

Mitch McConnell, on the Senate’s plan to ignore President Obama’s choice for the Supreme Court, no matter who he or she is: “The Senate will appropriately revisit the matter after the American people finish making in November the decision they’ve already started making today.”
Uh, as far as starting to make decisions, you think at least a dozen politicians haven’t started looking into office space in Iowa for 2020?

Dr. Ben Carson now on President Obama. “He was, you know, raised white….So, for him to, you know, claim that, you know, he identifies with the experience of black Americans, I think, is a bit of a stretch.”
Sounds like someone’s been hanging around on a podium with Donald Trump too long.

Getting at least a few emails a day from various liberal-Democratic groups urging me to sign a petition telling the Senate to vote on President Obama’s Supreme Court nominee. Now, I absolutely want a vote. But anybody really believe GOP senators give a rat’s ass about what Dems think?

Jeopardy says they are no longer accepting Canadian contestants, citing Canada’s privacy regulations. Hmm, or maybe looking at our Presidential primary so far, the show is afraid Canadians will make Americans look even dumber.

A Manhattan lawyer accused of raping a woman in his office says he’s innocent because he has “erectile dysfunction” and had not taken a Viagra on the night in question. I think I almost like “affluenza” better.

 

The oldest sorority on the University of Michigan campus, Kappa Alpha Theta, has been disbanded for “serious violations,” The chapter had already been suspended for hazing and underage drinking. Well, suppose it’s good to know women can be the equals of men, even if it’s getting a ‪#‎cantfixstupid‬

 

The Redskins have confirmed that RGIII will not return to Washington next season. Wonder if the Browns are interested. At worse RGIII could be disappointing without getting arrested.

#‎Facepalm‬ for the day. Travel agency client wants cross country trip next week, so I offer alternatives. He wants a different return, with a flight number that doesn’t exist. Try to explain that. Her response “we didn’t see seats either but we thought you might have better access.”

If you’ve got this far,. I started this blog in 2007.  By  WordPress estimates one of you today is my 500,000th reader.  So thanks, and hope you didn’t get sent to this site by accident.

Explore posts in the same categories: baseball jokes, GOP jokes, travel jokes, Uncategorized

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17 Comments on “What happens in Vegas…”

  1. hellen sims Says:

    CONGRATULATIONS on your longevity…just love your body of work. Hmmmm…you started around the same time then Senator Obama announced his running for President????

    Take Care,

    Hellen Sims

    I Support President Obama.

    Date: Wed, 24 Feb 2016 07:13:16 +0000
    To: hellen_sims@hotmail.com

  2. Dennis Mar Says:

    Even Cal Ripken Jr. would be impressed — it’s one thing to be play everyday but to be humorous everyday? That’s a steeper hill.

  3. Billy Says:

    Congrats Janice! Damn! I think I was 499,999! I’ve been counting all 9 years but I remember being ill on 03/17/2009 and I think I missed one!

  4. Don Sherman Says:

    Start my morning everyday by reading your blog.

  5. Marty Says:

    “and hope you didn’t get sent to this site by accident.”

    It was quite deliberate, thank you.

    Janice, I admire your wit and how you manage to keep informed on so many aspects of the news and how you can crank out this blog 365 days. Hope it keeps going for a long time.

  6. Murray Says:

    Yours is the first blog I read every morning. As a Canadian who takes a morbid interest in the wacky and sometimes scary machinations of American politics, I find your musings both illuminating and entertaining. Your blog should be required reading in every Civics class. And your sports coverage ain’t bad, either. Oh, and you can keep Cruz and Beiber and Dion, with our blessings.

  7. murrdenn Says:

    As a Canadian who views American politics and politicians with a morbid fascination, I find your blog both illuminating and entertaining. It’s the first thing I read every morning, and should be required reading in every Civics class in your country. Oh, and your sports coverage ain’t bad, either. Keep up the good work!

  8. Gary M Says:

    Bravo! Thanks for doing this almost every day!

  9. TC in BC Says:

    Congrats on getting over 500,000 readers. You know if you posted this also in Chinese, you’d have over 5 Billion!!!! (yes, they would all read it again half an hour later) Janice, you are me idol! 😎


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