All chewed up?
Remember when your mom told you if you swallowed chewing gum it would stay in your stomach forever? Well, Aaron Hernandez may find out that spitting that gum out might keep you in prison forever.
–
What a difference a couple weeks can make. Earlier this month the biggest worry the Patriots had was if Tim Tebow would be a positive or negative force on the team, and Paula Deen just had to worry about being blacklisted by places like Weight Watchers.–
–
The Notre Dame-Miami football rivalry over the years has been dubbed “Catholics vs. Convicts.” Who knew, “Christians vs. Convicts” could have been a 2013 Patriots intra-squad game.
–
How hot was it? New York Mayor Bloomberg was seen sneaking a “Big Gulp.”
–
Congrats to the Detroit Tigers’ Max Scherzer, 12-0 with a 3.18 ERA. How impressive is this start? If Scherzer pitched for the Marlins or Astros, his record might even be close to .500.
–
The New England Patriots announced that anyone who purchased an Aaron Hernandez jersey can trade it for one of equal value. Presumably with or without stripes? (Scott Russell wonders if another trade-in option might be an orange jumpsuit?)
–
–
Actor James Woods, 66, has dumped his 26-year old girlfriend for a 20 year-old. “That’s just gross” said even Hugh Hefner.
–
Cleveland 19 – Chicago 10. So how did I miss the opening of NFL preseason?
(the nightcap of the twilight doubleheader was Cleveland 9, Chicago 8. Wonder how often if ever the White Sox have scored 18 runs in two games and lost them both?)
–
Macky Sall, the President of Senegal, told President Obama ‘We are still not ready to decriminalize homosexuality. While we have respect for the rights of homosexuals, we are still not ready to change the law.” Is Sall angling to be asked to come to the U.S. and run for office as a Republican? Or is he trying to get Justice Scalia to visit?
–
Lance Armstrong told “Le Monde” magazine that it would have been “impossible” to win without doping, and that he still considers himself the record-holder for Tour victories. This man is so deep in denial he’s almost an honorary Sandusky.
–
Kyle Petty saying Danica Patrick is a “marketing machine” and not a “race car driver” because her hype and commercial success outweigh her results. So by that standard are the Chicago Cubs not a baseball team?
–
From Hartley Miller ” A 72-year-old Minnesota man has been sentenced to one week in prison for cheating in a fishing competition. In other words, he was caught hook, line and sinker.”
–
A 72-year-old Minnesota man has been sentenced to one week in prison for cheating in a fishing competition. In other words, he was caught hook, line and sinker. – See more at: http://hqprincegeorge.com/home/news/v/Local-Sports/214614/Hartley-Miller-s-Hart-Attack-June-28th-2013-Edition-425#sthash.AXajfEud.dpuf
Explore posts in the same categories: political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized
Tags: hernandez jokes, Janice Hough, NFL jokes, Patriot jokes, Paula Deen jokes
You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.
Left Coast Sports Babe 
Leave a comment