Left Coast Sports Babe

Bristol Palin’s baby daddy and his current girlfriend, Sunny Oglesby, 20, have had a baby girl. Her name, no joke, “Breeze Beretta Johnston.” See, there are worse fates than to be born to Snooki.

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At a press conference today, Apple unveiled their iPhone 5, with “a taller Retina display, faster LTE speeds, and a newer smaller connector.” And millions of baby boomers said “I have no idea what any of that means.”

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Oops, the pretty picture of warships below U.S fighter jets the last night of the Democratic convention turned out to feature Russian ships, and the DNC has apologized. Stupid mistake. But it wasn’t caught by any politicians who are veterans. Of either party.

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From my funny friend Alex Kaseberg. “In New Hampshire they renamed a pond called Jew Pond. Now it is called ‘Should It Kill You to Call Your Mother?’ Pond.”

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It’s a long nearly eight weeks to the election. But good news for folks on both sides – Jason Sudeikis, who does a great job with Romney and Biden, is returning to SNL.

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Notre Dame announced they will leave the Big East and join the ACC for all sports except football. Anyone else wish these universities would spend as much time worrying about tuition costs and academics as they do about what conferences they play in?

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A cat crawled unseen into a family’s suitcase and actually made it alive,   as checked luggage,   from Columbus, OH to Orlando  FL.  Wonder if the airline is trying how to retro-actively charge a pet fee?

 

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Another liberal voice weighing in on Libya? “I don’t feel that Mr. Romney has been doing himself any favors in the past few hours. Sometimes when really bad things happen, when hot things happen, cool words or no words is the way to go.”- Columnist Peggy Noonan.

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Budweiser is donating $5,000 for every SF Giants walk off win this year. Although recently they should be donating $5,000 for every time Jeffrey Affeldt comes in in relief – they sell more beer.

 

 

Mitt Romney,  saying he really isn’t anti-taxing the rich ”  I can tell that you people at the high end, high income taxpayers, are going to have fewer deductions and exemptions. Those numbers are going to come down, otherwise they’d get a tax break. And I want to make sure people understand,  I am not reducing taxes on high-income taxpayers.”

Leaving aside the Biden-esque length of the awkward sentence, wonder if one of the exemptions  Mitt wants to reduce  would be offshore accounts?

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This entry was posted on September 12, 2012 at 11:26 pm and is filed under baseball jokes, political jokes, sports jokes, Uncategorized. You can subscribe via RSS 2.0 feed to this post's comments.

Tags: election jokes, iPhone jokes, Janice Hough, Levi johnson baby jokes

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